instruction:
In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a short summary for this text. The summary must include a situation which caused humor. The summary should be one or two sentences long.
question:
Text: so recently, in a bag of carrots i bought, i found a carrot that looks like a penis. i took a picture of it hanging out of my pants, as one does, [*fig. 1*]( http://imgur.com/cc7mm4e) and sent it to all my friends. near this same time i sent my mom am email telling her how i was doing (i live out of state) as well as a few pictures i'd taken. this was one of those pictures. this was intentional, though, because i thought she'd get a kick out of it. what i didn't expect, on the other hand, was for her to open the email at work, with all her coworkers around.

this was one of her famale coworkers reactions, "i'm sorry,  oh i'm so sorry...that wasn't for me to see....oh i'm sorry!!!  it's like...the zipper is undone...and....omg."
answer:
my mom's coworkers think i send her dick-pics thanks to vegetables.


question:
Text: i feel obliged to say "i feel obliged to mention this happened in my youth."  but i still feel the fu and assume i always will.

it was 1993.  california was experiencing a hotter summer than usual while me and the neighborhood kids played water warfare.

as my mother pulled into the driveway after having been grocery shopping, i found myself dry and wishing i was not so good at avoiding the other team's water attacks.  my mother always brings a treat back from shopping for her kids to enjoy so i decided to suicide myself and allow my friends to soak me (imagine the scene from boondocks saints where dafoe's character yells "there was a fire fight!")

dripping like a wet dog i scampered up to my mom who knew what i was hoping for and told me the treats are in the van.  

now, i'll mention the fact that the treats are never the same, but usually is a piece of chocolate candy.  little me had no chance to avoid the scarring event that would change me forever.

the back hatch of the van was still open and as i walked up to it i feverishly looked for my treat like a junkie.  it wasn't until i lifted the false flooring that hides the spare tire that i found a single chocolate wafer still in its wrapper.  i can still remember thinking to myself "haha!  thought you could hide it did you?"

i ripped that chocolate open and ate half of it in one big bite.  

it was gross.

it was warm.

it tasted not like chocolate, but like something else i couldn't quite put my finger on.  until i looked at the rest of it clutched in my tiny little hand.

the inside of it was practically only maggots.  they hollowed out the chocolate and made it their home.
as i watched them wriggle i started to feel them moving in my mouth as i chewed the giant choco maggot mess.

instant vomit, instant tears, instant regret.

my mom comes running out of the house as my friends stop their war to come see the show.

turns out my mother's treat was the blue raspberry icee sitting in the front cup holder.  what i thought was my treat, was actually a chocolate candy left and forgotten about since last halloween, almost 10 months prior.

i was inconsolable.  my favorite treat had betrayed me and i remember running inside the house, throwing the last chunk of maggot surprise into the sink where i stoically watched the surviving creeps wriggle and squirm as i contemplated the horror.  

flash forward to any time i interact with warm melted chocolate (although even fresh chocolate gives me mild goosebumps) i get nauseous and sweaty and feel like i need to get away.  it took a while before i could even smell chocolate without dry heaving.

it's interesting how one life experience can shape the weirdo i would become.
answer:
there were maggots in the chocolate. i ate them, vomited, became scarred for life.


question:
Text: okay let's set the scene. i was about halfway through my shift at a popular fast food chain (kfc) in southern sydney. so the time is around 7:45 pm on a monday night and there about 5 people total, working including a cook and the manager. so anyway this lady comes in and orders her food which is one of those big family meals you normally get at fast food places. the other person working at the front counter and i start preparing her meal and start taking other orders because there is a queue of other people waiting for their food. when we finally hand over her food she starts to get angry and says "took your time didn't you." in the rudest tone she could muster. as she turns off and walks out she says "this is probably the f***ing slowest kfc that i've been to." just as she is about to exit the building i say to myself under my breath (in hindsight probably not the best thing to do) "if that's your opinion." oh boy did i release the floodgates. the lady comes back and demands to speak to my manager using many swear words and calling me not so nice (probably deserved) names. the manager then comes over to help defuse the situation and then she starts ripping into him. he then gives her a free 1.25 litre drink to shut her up and she still keeps going on and on. these two builders that were waiting for their food then start ripping into her causing her to storm out of the store saying she will never eat at our kfc again. after all this subsides i'm pulled aside by the manager and he says i'm going to have to talk to the store manager on my next shift which i am not looking forward to.
answer:

said a comment under my breath opened the gates of hell


