Ross : But if I'm not comfortable with it, I don't have to be involved.

- It's totally up to me. - She is so great. I miss her.

- What does she mean by "involved"? - Your job is done.

And the most enjoyable.

Phoebe, say something.

Ross : They want me to go down to this sonogram thing..

Ross : with them tomorrow.

Remember when life was simpler..

and she was just a lesbian?

Those were the days.

Rachel : - What are you gonna do? - I have no idea.

Ross : No matter what I do, I'm still gonna be a father.


Leonard : Wolowitz sent his in two days ago.

Penny : -Really, let it go. -Look, maybe it is a long shot,

Leonard : but sometimes long shots happen.

Leonard : Luke Skywalker was only given one chance to destroy the Death Star.

Leonard : He had to get a torpedo into an exhaust port

Leonard : that was only two meters wide, but with the help of The Force, he--


while we're waiting okay yeah maybe it's going home maybe we'll go home alright

maybe it's cause a little squid can you

maybe it's cause a little squid can you

maybe it's cause a little squid can you give those squiddy up Aroon yeah that

give those squiddy up Aroon yeah that

give those squiddy up Aroon yeah that was nice of you oh my goodness he let

was nice of you oh my goodness he let

was nice of you oh my goodness he let this tiger here to put this is a tiger

this tiger here to put this is a tiger

this tiger here to put this is a tiger so cool oh I see you're sopping wet it


Lily : That's not her.

I'm so sorry. What? What?


Sheldon : What kind of person leaves his keys in the car?

Leonard : Thought we agreed it's Koothrappali's fault.

Sheldon : You're right.

Sheldon : Nice going.

Scene : Car.


Penny : So I'm gonna do the grown-up thing and see it through.

Leonard : Well, that is the grown-up thing.

Howard : I guess.

Leonard : I love you.


Sheldon : Every year we'd have a party.

Sheldon : No one I invited would ever come,

Sheldon : because they didn't like me.

Amy : I'm sorry.

Sheldon : Oh, that part wasn't so bad.

Sheldon : I didn't like them, either.

Sheldon : But then I'd inevitably spend

Sheldon : the whole day being tortured by my sister's friends.

Oh, you poor thing.

Sheldon : When I was six, they told me Batman was coming to my party.

Sheldon : I waited by the door for hours.


Beckett : Is this some kind of a weird come-on?

Castle : I think I know what Bobby Mann was doing at that comedy club,

Castle : I think I know why he thought he was an awful person,

Castle : and I think I know who killed him.

Beckett : Mr. McPhee?


Howard : ...I'll see you around.

Howard : See you.

Raj : No, wait.

Raj : Take her number. I don't want the temptation.

Leonard : Okay.

Raj : I must be strong so I don't stray from my true purpose : The study of the universe.

Sheldon : All right.

Howard : Thanks for ruining lobster for me.

Raj : Wait! Give me the number!

Raj : Give me the number! Give me the number!


juice out of it it's dripping oh no you

juice out of it it's dripping oh no you oh no it's dripping even there's like a

oh no it's dripping even there's like a

oh no it's dripping even there's like a jellia should I move some look at that

jellia should I move some look at that

jellia should I move some look at that yellow sheen Casey so that's the gelatin

yellow sheen Casey so that's the gelatin that's not that's the collagen from the

that's not that's the collagen from the

that's not that's the collagen from the pig's feet right here you got to eat it

pig's feet right here you got to eat it

pig's feet right here you got to eat it before it falls off the spoon go for it

before it falls off the spoon go for it

before it falls off the spoon go for it go for it

oh man oh that's delicious

oh man oh that's delicious

oh man oh that's delicious you think it's just gonna be like fine

you think it's just gonna be like fine

you think it's just gonna be like fine peanuts but they are encased in pig

peanuts but they are encased in pig

peanuts but they are encased in pig juices rather than have like a having

juices rather than have like a having

juices rather than have like a having like a crunchy nutty taste they have

like a crunchy nutty taste they have

like a crunchy nutty taste they have more of an almost like a starchy almost

more of an almost like a starchy almost

more of an almost like a starchy almost like potato Eve taste index return with

like potato Eve taste index return with

like potato Eve taste index return with a little more of a crunch a chunk of


Alexis : Oh, nice. But I already picked up a copy on my way home.

Castle : - Well, did you read it? Was she kind? - The writer loved you.


[Alex] Sucks to be Bill right now.

George : How's Burke gonna tell him the baby's not his?

Alex : - Burke's not gonna tell. - He has to.

Alex : Bill's better off not knowing.

George : You think Holly knows Bill's not the father?

Alex : - Maybe, maybe not. - Bill should know his wife's cheating.

Burke : I don't remember asking for your opinions,

Burke : so keep them to yourselves.


My specimen's in the room.

l just want to thank whoever knocked on the door while l was in there.

Chandler : Really helped speed the process along.


so two years ago what is that wiener

so two years ago what is that wiener dogs here I wonder what that could be

dogs here I wonder what that could be

dogs here I wonder what that could be what do you guys think

what do you guys think

what do you guys think what is that okay what is that when it


must be some good dosa oh wow something

must be some good dosa oh wow something is definitely happening that that's

is definitely happening that that's

is definitely happening that that's hopefully not those are related there's

hopefully not those are related there's

hopefully not those are related there's just a lot of people there shutting

just a lot of people there shutting

just a lot of people there shutting those up no no more

this'll dude there was some fighting and there's no more dosas now like someone

there's no more dosas now like someone

there's no more dosas now like someone fights they they get shut down this

fights they they get shut down this

fights they they get shut down this happens all the time

happens all the time

happens all the time you guys just people just fight over

you guys just people just fight over

you guys just people just fight over this so good really is it that good with


Phoebe Sr. : One last thing.

Phoebe Sr. : You came looking for family.

I'm family.

I'm it.

Now I'm done.


Hey, Lily, hope you're feeling better.

Marshall told us you're exploding from both ends like a busted fire hydrant.

Lily : Damn it.

Anyway, listen, I was going to get back together with Zoey today,

but I came to my senses on the way out here, so...

False alarm.

Oh, crap.

Just stepped in some gum.

I'm getting back together with Zoey!

Robin : We're never gonna find him.

Lily : Wait.

Lily : That's was a subway announcement in the background.

Lily : I speak conductor.

Lily : Got it. Ted's at...


cheery music

- Whoa, real snow!

- [Brian] There's snow?! What?

You guys, there's actually snow in California?!

Whoa! We got our own snow hill, dude.

Jump in it. Is it real snow?

Oh, your-- laughs

His shoe came off already.


That when I made something of myself,

I would honor you somehow.

So you took my name and starred

In welcome to the sex truck?

Ted : Yeah.

Um, yeah, listen, ted, you got to stop using my name.

I-I'm trying to make a career as an architect.

Architect, huh?

You mean like a sex architect?

What? Yeah, you know, you're on to something.

That would make a great title of a film.

Ted mosby, sex architect.

You know, I'm actually looking for a new project

To shoot next Friday afternoon.

Yeah, listen, isn't, isn't there some other way

You could honor me?

With all due respect.

Wait, you're not mad, are you?


Beckett : Hey, we got a match. Mickey Carlson, delivery boy.

Both the Dysons and Michele Langford are on his route.

Castle : Delivery boy, knew it.

Beckett : Anyway, he didn't show this morning, another carrier had to cover.

You know, there's no address on this application.

Beckett : Do you have one on file?


It's allergies.

Okay, ha.

I took some Benadryl, I'll be fine.

Bernadette : So did you miss me?


Monica : I knew you were likely to take a wife!

Can we come in yet? We're dying out here!


tomorrow I did or maybe that's it

tomorrow I did or maybe that's it officially no oh

wow these guys are the best oh my see

wow these guys are the best oh my see

wow these guys are the best oh my see you guys tomorrow tomorrow you know

you guys tomorrow tomorrow you know

you guys tomorrow tomorrow you know tomorrow tomorrow guys listen to me

tomorrow tomorrow guys listen to me

tomorrow tomorrow guys listen to me Mommy and Daddy is wedding anniversary

Mommy and Daddy is wedding anniversary

Mommy and Daddy is wedding anniversary tomorrow seven years seven years ago

tomorrow seven years seven years ago

tomorrow seven years seven years ago tomorrow mommy and daddy got married

tomorrow seven years ago

tomorrow seven years ago

tomorrow seven years ago mommy died and this is our seventh it is

mommy died and this is our seventh it is nothing called a 7-year itch this could

nothing called a 7-year itch this could

nothing called a 7-year itch this could be it was gonna be last year


Howard : ...this right here is the black box.

What are you talking about? The date went fine.

Raj : She said she wants to slow things down.

Leonard : Okay, so she said she wants to slow things down.

Leonard : It's like saying, "I'm really enjoying this meal.

I'm going to slow down and savor it."

No, it's like, "This fish tastes bad...

...so I'm gonna slow down and spit it out."

- You being the fish. - I'm not the fish.

Oh, really? Did you make a second date?

- Well, no. We sort of decided to wing it. - Oh, even I know that's lame.

Okay. All right. Let's assume your hypothesis.

Leonard : We went to dinner, we talked, we laughed, we kissed.

Where could I have gone wrong?

Howard : Think back, Leonard. The littlest things can set women off.

Like, "Hey, the waitress is hot. I bet we could get her to come home with us."

Or, "How much does your mom weigh? I wanna know what I'm getting into."

- I didn't say anything like that. - Good, because they don't work.


Monica : -I'm not actually Amish. -Really? Then why are you like that?

Teacher : -You, by the door, in or out? -ln.


Wilson : Sam, will you marry me again?


and beautiful morning!

We've got bluebirds flyin' around.

My dad set up this little trap for the boys,

so they could try and catch a bluebird, huh?

Haven't caught one yet though, huh?

Takes patience, huh?

Do you have patience Ollie?

- [Finn] I see a black bird!

- There's a bluebird!

- [Finn] Hey, come back here!

- Come here, come here bluebird!

But yeah, it is a beautiful day.

We are wearing sweaters, but it is a pretty warm day today.

It's probably like in the 70's and not cold at all.

But it's nice, last year it snowed,

the year before that it snowed,

and then this year, we're just gonna have

a little bit warmer weather, but it feels nice.


Voice : say hello J-J-J-Jasmine.

Marshall : Barney?

Marsahll : Is it just me or does that stripper look exactly like...?

Barney : Ted, we found a stripper who looks exactly like Lily!

Ted : Yeah, I can't talk right now.

Barney : I'm speechless, too.

Barney : Everything's as perky as we've always imagined!

Marshall : Stop looking at her.

Ted : Uh, look, I got to go.

Ted : Take a picture.

Barney : Oh, I will.

Barney : But first, I'm going to make Marshall

Barney : watch as I wedge Ulysses S. Grant


or nearly time that I got open - thanks

or nearly time that I got open - thanks reopen s not when you sing that song

reopen s not when you sing that song

reopen s not when you sing that song before I know it's like it's like I'm


I really wanna taste this Mongoose,

which has been marinated,

she said is some calamansi,

and also some soy and I think ginger and garlic.

Oh yes.

Mongoose is,

one of the best things to eat in the Phillippines,

and with some chili and this.

Break this chili.

Oh yeah.

With some of the rice.

Oh yeah.

Oh I love it.

Oh mongoose is,

such a good fish.

It's so pure.

It is,

kind of has that dryish texture

similar to tuna.

And also the chicken curry looks amazing

with carrots and potatoes.

Wow.

Mm.

Yeah, the curry is really good as well.

- [Man] But not as spicy as what we're used to.


Foreman : It's diagnostic. Everything's under control.

Cuddy : Yeah, excellent job so far. House, outside.

House : Keep watching.

House : You'll never guess what Rico's got in that box.

Marie : Rico doesn't even know I'm alive.

Cuddy : You have an obsession with an actor or the character he plays. I feel for you.

Cuddy : You need to work it out. But I need you to do it

Cuddy : when the hospital's accreditation, and my job, are not on the line.

House : You want the star of the hottest daytime drama on TV to die in your hospital?

Cuddy : No, I want you to cure him without committing any more felonies.

House : I can't do my job if you're going to tie my hands like that.

Cuddy : Fifty-one weeks out of the year,

Cuddy : I let you run around like a monkey in a banana factory.

All I'm just asking is that you tone it down for a few days.


He wrote it in pen, I'd say four or five days ago.

Lanie : But that's not why I called you.

Lanie : Look at this.

Lanie : On his chest, next to the Y incision.

Beckett : Look at what?

LANIE : It's subtle.

Lanie : So subtle I almost missed it.

Lanie : But I think it explains why his shirt was ripped open.

Lanie : You see this grainy material?

BECKETT : Yeah.

Lanie : It's adhesive residue.

Lanie : In fact, there's a residue pattern from his belly to his chest.

Lanie : - Adhesive? - LANIE : Mmm-hmm.

Lanie : Looking at the pattern, I'd say your Wall Street wolf was wearing a wire.

GATES : A wire?

BECKETT : Yes, sir. We believe our killer

Beckett : removed it from the victim's body after shooting him.

Gates : Do we know who he was wearing a wire for?

Well, we're checking with other branches of law enforcement right now.

GATES : What about this woman who called in the murder?

Gates : Have you been able to identify her?

Beckett : You know, no one in Cordero's life seems to know who she is,

Beckett : and we have no idea where to find her.


Beckett : Then who's up there?

Esposito : Could be someone or could be just a light.

- Did you just see that? - All right, guys. Let's move. Come on.

It was nothing. Just a sheet.

Beckett : You guys! Over here.


the ramen is really good because it's

the ramen is really good because it's almost like it's just pure whereas the

almost like it's just pure whereas the

almost like it's just pure whereas the cooked one has a little more of a

cooked one has a little more of a

cooked one has a little more of a crunchy and it's a little more tender I

crunchy and it's a little more tender I

crunchy and it's a little more tender I think real quality great tasting beef

think real quality great tasting beef

think real quality great tasting beef [Music]

the cook bonus it's awesome so that's

the cook bonus it's awesome so that's

the cook bonus it's awesome so that's the end of this Ethiopian food tour and

the end of this Ethiopian food tour and

the end of this Ethiopian food tour and that was some serious meat at the end

that was some serious meat at the end

that was some serious meat at the end the raw meat was amazing it's so good


ELLIS : Afraid to be happy.

ELLIS : And I'm all alone.

ELLIS : Now I have to raise my daughter alone.

How am I expected to do that?

MEREDITH : Mom.

MEREDITH : You did the best you could.

MEREDITH : You did the best you could. That's all anybody can do.


and the thing with that is you put the whole thing in your mouth because you cannot cut it because the fruit is in the

Middle so the salted cake is inside the fruit which is kind of hollowed out in the middle

And then it's sitting that little bird nest of charcoal and maybe like super thin noodles

when you bite down as you crunch through that slightly bitter charcoal exterior if you reach the fruit which is sweet

It's delicate you bite through that the juices out, and then you hit the center, and that's just like a luxurious

Little pocket of melty eggy gold so basically what I'm saying is yeah

You gotta go eat that all right guys my time is literally up here


Castle : Yeah. Okay, it's probably not that.

Castle : But still, it could be good news.

Beckett : Well, then why is my cop sense telling me it's bad?

Tory Ellis : Hey, guys. Got something.

Tory : I was running those license plates on Emma's list,

Tory : seeing if any of the owners have criminal backgrounds,

Tory : when I noticed this car, registered to an address

Tory : right down the street from the coffee shop

Tory : where Emma went the day she was killed.

Castle : She was surveilling that car.

She must've thought it was the one

Beckett : that Zoey got into at the truck stop.

Castle : And when the owner of the car realized

Castle : she was onto him, he went after her.

Whose car is it?

Tory : That's the weird thing. It belongs to this woman.

"Connie Lewis."

Tory : But she's 72 and has no criminal record.

Beckett : What's her address?


blog real estate little smartass thing

blog real estate little smartass thing and get shot Chris sucks cool down she

and get shot Chris sucks cool down she

and get shot Chris sucks cool down she the only reason is cuz she tweeted out

the only reason is cuz she tweeted out

the only reason is cuz she tweeted out me she wrote a rap gross she spent 30


chef talking on cellphone


a curry aroma to it, so I'm not sure if there's curry leaves

in here, too.

Oh, that is insane.

Oh, that goat meat is so tender.

And those ants have a little bit of a sour crunch to them.

The skin is kinda fatty and creamy,

well, fully fatty and creamy.

And then it has this amazing basily citrusy flavor to it.

Oh man, that's good.

The next dish over here are the fried riblets.

And these are deep fried ribs.

Oh yeah.

Oh, that's just deep fried crunchy rib goodness.

Fully crispified, so like ...

A little bit oily, it's salty,

you can taste the pepper on there.

There are a few more meat dishes that are on their way,


Oh yeah, that is very refreshing, very cool.

Just, there's nothing more pure.

I say this every time I drink a coconut.

Copacabana Beach, it's a four-kilometer stretch of sand.

And behind, although it's like kind of blocked by buildings,

you can just see the, the tip of it over there,

is Sugar Loaf Mountain in Portuguese it's called

Pao de Acucar, and it's called Sugar Loaf,

whoa, take a few steps back.

It is called Sugar Loaf because it resembles

the sugar loaves, how they molded the sugar from Brazil.

And on Copacabana Beach, Sugar Loaf was a little bit far

so we just took a drive, this is called the Red Beach

in an area called Urca, and this is another beautiful beach,

just a small beach, a bay with rocks,

massive rock pillars on either side.


Mrs Cooper : Did I start that sentence with the words "if it please Your Highness"?

Sheldon : I'm not going to. I didn't say anything that wasn't true.

Mrs Cooper : Now, you listen here.

I have been telling you since you were 4.

Mrs Cooper : It's okay to be smarter than everybody, but you can't go around pointing it out.

- Why not? - Because people don't like it.

Mrs Cooper : Remember all the ass-kickings from the neighbor kids?

Mrs Cooper : Now, let's get cracking.

Mrs Cooper : Shower, shirt, shoes and let's shove off.


flavor some curry powder to get that

flavor some curry powder to get that nice yellow color it's always you know

nice yellow color it's always you know

nice yellow color it's always you know advisable to use turmeric but then this

advisable to use turmeric but then this

advisable to use turmeric but then this kind of powder sundry spice had lots of

kind of powder sundry spice had lots of

kind of powder sundry spice had lots of everything inside is mixed with tumeric

everything inside is mixed with tumeric

everything inside is mixed with tumeric just gonna spice it up a bit of some

just gonna spice it up a bit of some

just gonna spice it up a bit of some black paper and then of course some lime

black paper and then of course some lime juice to get the extra tankyness

of course never forget the salt my


I need to talk to you about something.

After they broke up, robin went back to being robin.

Welcome home, scherbatsky.

Oh, good to be back.


Beckett : Please don't tell me you ambulance-chased this woman.

Castle : Beckett, that is an outrageous accusation.

Castle : I, as a member of the writing community,

Castle : merely went by her home to offer my condolences.

Hmm. And I suppose you told her that you're a PI

Beckett : who just happens to have connections with the NYPD.

Castle : The topic may have come up.

Castle : You look gorgeous, by the way.


When we came, it was almost empty, now it's packed,

there's not even an empty table.

Okay, back to the fish.

Oh, and you do have to be careful of bones.

There are bones, lots of them.

Let me fish this guy out.

Oh, I'm so happy I ordered this dish.


there are still things I haven't figured out yet

out yet

out yet Cheers or curtains that's the curtains

Cheers or curtains that's the curtains

Cheers or curtains that's the curtains open this

it's kind of like for room sections it

it's kind of like for room sections it

it's kind of like for room sections it really is an entire apartment it's a

really is an entire apartment it's a

really is an entire apartment it's a suite and it's it's minimalistic but

suite and it's it's minimalistic but

suite and it's it's minimalistic but like very elegant very like very

like very elegant very like very

like very elegant very like very heritage feel to it and actually this

heritage feel to it and actually this

heritage feel to it and actually this hotel has other Mandarin Oriental in

hotel has other Mandarin Oriental in

hotel has other Mandarin Oriental in Bangkok Asia has a hundred and forty

Bangkok Asia has a hundred and forty

Bangkok Asia has a hundred and forty years of history it was originally a

years of history it was originally a

years of history it was originally a hotel I mean its strategic location

hotel I mean its strategic location

hotel I mean its strategic location along the chao praya river where

along the chao praya river where

along the chao praya river where seafarers and traders they would come

seafarers and traders they would come

seafarers and traders they would come they would stay here and that eventually

they would stay here and that eventually turned into the Mandarin Oriental and

turned into the Mandarin Oriental and

turned into the Mandarin Oriental and what it is today so this is the entrance

what it is today so this is the entrance area there what could this be called

area there what could this be called

area there what could this be called like the the dining room this is kind of

like the the dining room this is kind of like a dining room they actually have a

like a dining room they actually have a

like a dining room they actually have a full dining room table platter of fruit

full dining room table platter of fruit

full dining room table platter of fruit which they replenish every day and a

which they replenish every day and a

which they replenish every day and a platter of chocolates and this has

platter of chocolates and this has

platter of chocolates and this has slowly kind of like diminished


not happening today and we are really

not happening today and we are really proud actually to take factory by the

proud actually to take factory by the

proud actually to take factory by the fact that they seem to have calories

fact that they seem to have calories

fact that they seem to have calories written down after every meal and

written down after every meal and

written down after every meal and there's far too many to thousands over

there's far too many to thousands over

there's far too many to thousands over 2,000 calorie options which in here yeah


Marshall : I am going to run the new york city marathon.

Lily : "it is important to load up

"on carbohydrates two to four hours before a big run.

"Try a breakfast

"of a bagel, a banana,

Lily : Oatmeal, strawberries and some orange juice."

Lily : Here you go, marshmallow.

Lily : Just like the book said.


Is to have soft-serve ice cream and they have periodically to have different flavors?

But I think the only flavor they have here for now

It's just fresh milk, and then I'm gonna add some strawberry glaze in mine if this could fit on my wrist

I was just wear this around and eat when I'm hungry. Oh wow!

Okay


Bengali food which is really known for

Bengali food which is really known for his abundant use of roots and spices to

his abundant use of roots and spices to

his abundant use of roots and spices to create such a depth of flavor in always

create such a depth of flavor in always

create such a depth of flavor in always dishes the food can be fiery and can be

dishes the food can be fiery and can be

dishes the food can be fiery and can be delicate or anything in between and I

delicate or anything in between and I

delicate or anything in between and I can't wait to get started

can't wait to get started

can't wait to get started let's go use

let's go use

let's go use [Music]

[Music]

[Music] and guys I am joined today by two

and guys I am joined today by two

and guys I am joined today by two sisters ho and Co you guys grew up here

sisters ho and Co you guys grew up here

sisters ho and Co you guys grew up here yes we did most importantly do you guys

yes we did most importantly do you guys

yes we did most importantly do you guys love food


Amy : Sheldon, it's a beautiful night.

Amy : Why don't you and I go for a nice walk together?

Sheldon : Oh, everything is just sex with you isn't it?

Raj : Sheldon, I think you might find the support

Raj : you're looking for, if you realize

Raj : that relationships are a give and take.

Raj : She can only be there for you

Raj : as much as you are for her.

Amy : Thank you, Rajesh.

Raj : And, Amy, you need to be patient with Sheldon,

Raj : instead of pressuring him to accept intimacy on your terms.

Sheldon : You should probably go.

Ira Flatow : I'm Ira Flatow, and this is Science Friday.

Ira : I'd like to welcome back Dr. Sheldon Cooper,

Ira : who thought he had discovered

Ira : a new super-heavy element only to have it disproved

Ira : by my next guest, Dr. Leonard Hofstadter.

Welcome to Science Friday, gentlemen.


Stop it! Both of you!

Sheldon : This fighting, I might as well be back with my parents.

[AS MOTHER] "I told you if you didn't quit drinking, I'd leave you."

[AS FATHER] "I guess that makes you a liar. I'm drunk as hell and you're still here."

[AS MOTHER] "Stop yelling. You're making Sheldon cry."

[AS FATHER] "I'll tell you what's making Sheldon cry.

That I let you name him Sheldon."


Sheldon : They were having fun wrong.

Priya : Come here, Sheldon. Sit here with me.

Sheldon : Thank you.

Priya : Would you like some homemade chili?

Sheldon : Are there beans in it?


I didn't bring you to ambush her.

Monica : Frannie was the one who showed your Playboys to Mom.

Ross : That bitch.


Chandler : The bottom line is, I want her to have it...

Chandler : ...even if I don't get to be the one who gives it to her.

Rachel : Honey, that's so sweet.

Chandler : You don't think it's just pathetic?

Oh, "pathetic"!

Joey : I've been looking all over for you.

-Where? -Our place. The hall.

Chandler : I got something for her.

Chandler : It's a book.

Chandler : A book?

Is it a book that's also a safe?

Chandler : It's a book that's just a book.

It's the Velveteen Rabbit. It was her favorite as a kid.

Chandler : So just let me know if she likes it, okay?


I took a portion of it, you can smell the onions.

You can smell kind of a spice like cinnamon a little bit.

He's adding some oil, he's adding in some more onions.

Oh, man.

speaking in foreign language

- [Mark] Ah, wow, it smells so good.

And he's actually gonna make it into a sandwich.


House : and frankly, given what the truth is, it's a tough call.

Artie : You'd broken up. She was crying...

House : Your girlfriend is not allergic to your semen.

House : She's allergic to the Egyptian parasites

House : swimming around in your dad's semen.

Nick : You slept with Abby?

Artie : I was drunk. We both...

House : No need to explain. Technically, she was legal.

Artie : Wait, wait! Wait!

House : Hey, all things considered, it's actually great news.

Wilson : So, what do you think?

House : You wussed out and used a decorator.

Wilson : Why can't that be me? A wuss who loves decorators.

Because it's not.

Wilson : Okay, it's not.

Wilson : But don't return it. I can't keep doing this.

House : You have to. You can't keep letting other people define you.

House : Not another elephant.


which is just, the flavor is steaming off of these escargot.

Mm.

Wow.

That is the most aromatic and flavorful sauce.

You could actually just drink that sauce.

It is so enjoyable.

The lemongrass, the kaffir lime,

the ginger, the chili, the fish sauce.

A little bit of sweetness in there

all in this amazing, amazing escargot.

That flavor will blow your mind.


Beckett : Come on.

Beckett : Come on.

There.

Castle : One sample of damning DNA evidence coming right up.


Amy : Play with your phone.


House : Night game?

Ragged-red fiber.

House : It's an inherited condition.

House : Dropping things, muscle weakness, poor night vision.

Makes people seem uncoordinated, accident-prone, careless.

House : It's transmitted in mitochondrial DNA

House : so it only passes through the mother.

House : Your wife's family weren't drunks, they were sick.

Wilson : It wouldn't have affected his liver.

House : The kid is a drunk.

He thinks that he killed his mother

House : and turned his father into a vegetable.

House : I might have a few shots myself.

House : Test his DNA for ragged-red fiber.

House : Why don't we not assume that the test is negative until we actually do it?


Marshall : I mean, you know

Marshall : I at least have to tell lily.

Barney : You can't. You can't tell anyone.

Barney : Attorney-client privilege.

Marshall : Why are you doing this to me?!

Barney : Because I need you, marshall, as my lawyer,

Barney : To prove that I didn't do anything wrong.

Marshall : How can I help you as your lawyer?

Marshall : You didn't break any laws, did you?

Marshall : Robin knows you slept with her, doesn't she?

Barney : I didn't break any state or federal laws,

Barney : But I think I broke a much, much higher law.


is let's open the stage up here

is let's open the stage up here [Music]

you ready and I see ya so in the place

you ready and I see ya so in the place

you ready and I see ya so in the place damn there's such a good hotel they

damn there's such a good hotel they

damn there's such a good hotel they really look after you know but they they

really look after you know but they they I by the beach later on today they came

I by the beach later on today they came

I by the beach later on today they came up to it and they were like you know she

up to it and they were like you know she wants a sense of entertainers to the

wants a sense of entertainers to the

wants a sense of entertainers to the room today three kids you know they

room today three kids you know they

room today three kids you know they don't know if he's coming do you know

don't know if he's coming do you know

don't know if he's coming do you know whose company me now I know I was


Wow that's awesome

Wow that's awesome

Wow that's awesome holy cow this is massive first of all

holy cow this is massive first of all

holy cow this is massive first of all it's beautiful I see tempura shrimp

it's beautiful I see tempura shrimp

it's beautiful I see tempura shrimp eggplant I see a seashell leave was like

eggplant I see a seashell leave was like a Japanese minced fish pig I see beef I

a Japanese minced fish pig I see beef I

a Japanese minced fish pig I see beef I think there's some chicken in here it's

think there's some chicken in here it's

think there's some chicken in here it's a dashi broth but also looks like an egg

a dashi broth but also looks like an egg drop soup as well smells ridiculous

drop soup as well smells ridiculous

drop soup as well smells ridiculous ether dr. Maas ah it's so complicated


getting one that just beyond civilized

getting one that just beyond civilized time so incredibly excited for this this

time so incredibly excited for this this is the beef sandwich all that beautiful

is the beef sandwich all that beautiful

is the beef sandwich all that beautiful beef broth it's soaked into the sandwich

beef broth it's soaked into the sandwich a little shitty and this juicy looking

a little shitty and this juicy looking

a little shitty and this juicy looking slices of beef oh man you can easily

slices of beef oh man you can easily

slices of beef oh man you can easily easily pull this apart and the other

easily pull this apart and the other

easily pull this apart and the other sandwich is the beef stomach I love love

sandwich is the beef stomach I love love tripe with really tender pieces of tripe

tripe with really tender pieces of tripe again with the same sauce st. broth

again with the same sauce st. broth

again with the same sauce st. broth cover that up this is my most

cover that up this is my most

cover that up this is my most anticipated breakfast and it's coming to


and what let's spill it hands-on with

and what let's spill it hands-on with this baby here that's a fatty piece of

this baby here that's a fatty piece of

this baby here that's a fatty piece of salmon that's a piece of salmon that's

salmon that's a piece of salmon that's

salmon that's a piece of salmon that's gonna keep you warm at night oh that was

gonna keep you warm at night oh that was a good round pre-programmed for let's go

a good round pre-programmed for let's go for some more Lobster I just put in my

for some more Lobster I just put in my

for some more Lobster I just put in my barbecue order I think it's gonna be

barbecue order I think it's gonna be

barbecue order I think it's gonna be about 10 minutes and I'm feeling a bit

about 10 minutes and I'm feeling a bit

about 10 minutes and I'm feeling a bit lonely hands I go


I had panic attacks, like, physical pain.

You know, it was, like, worse, it was like I was dying.

When I met Angela,

Stewart : she was the only reason

Stewart : that I ever wanted to go out.

But then she died, and...

Cameron : Blood test will be done soon.

Taub : I'm guessing that's a new technique.

Hey, do you remember that idea that Cameron had

House : about trying to torture the patient into admitting himself?

Taub : Pretty sure it was your idea.

Taub : You want me to slow down the test?

House : Wow, everyone's got all these great ideas today.

House : So you're thinking, "Patient won't leave because leaving causes pain,

"so we gotta make staying more painful."

House : That actually makes sense.

Taub : You'll increase his pain, but not enough to make a difference.

Taub : He's on morphine.

House : He's on morphine now,


plus that foamy head of the Guinness combining together.

- Oh yeah.

- Yeah, it's like soursop foam and Guinness foam,

but that Guinness is almost there,

'cause it's only one Guinness for that whole bucket,

but I think the Guinness is more there

for the foam, actually, for the texture,

for the texture.

That soursop flavor though is beautiful,

it's milky. - Oh, Betty.

- Okay, oh, I forgot about the condensed milk

which makes it creamy too.

- [Matt] Really crazy one.

- A hint of bitterness from the Guinness?

- Special beverage.

And you can go more Guinness too and it's still good,

it just tastes a little different,

little different texture.


Uh, four "Under the Seas," two "Enchanted Evenings,"

and one "Night to Remember"

Penny : that... I cannot remember for the life of me.


Well, that I can see crying over, but Bambi is a cartoon.

You didn't cry when Bambi's mother died?

Chandler : Yes, it was very sad when the guy stopped drawing the deer.

If this movie's making you guys cry so much, let's just change the channel.

There.


Robin : Moist.

Robin : Moist.

Robin : Moist.

Ted : That was the first 40 minutes of barney's show.

Robin : Moist.

Ted voix off : And then we endured about 20 minutes of this.

Barney : I have to go refill.

Barney : I'll be back in a moment.

Barney : Play's not over.

Marshall : I never get picked for audience participation.

Ted voix off : And then it just got weird.

Robin : Feelings.

Barney : Inside.

Barney : Oh, no!


Barney : "We care about making dreams come true", in three, two...


It's unbelievable, and what's amazing is also the different

parts of the pig because all of them have different tastes,

textures, all of them have different like jelly-ness feels

to them.

The, the fattiness content, the porkiness, the beans.

The most beautiful plates.

speaking Portuguese

That's a jelly fatty piece.

funky music

It's stunning.

The only thing I might do. speaking Spanish


Sheldon : So what? I don't issue invitations to your mother.

Missy : It would be nice not to have to drive to Anaheim in rush hour.

Sheldon : And don't ever call me Shelly.

Leonard : So it's settled. You'll stay with us.

Howard : I'll walk you to your car. You're in Structure 3, Level C, right?

Sheldon : What just happened?

So anyway, we're 8 years old...

Missy : ...and Sheldon converts my Easy-Bake Oven to some kind of high-powered furnace.


Rachel : - Wow, so he's gotta be- - Old? Yeah.

Amy : But he travels a lot, so he's hardly ever there.

Sweetie, I gotta tell you, it sounds a little bit like...

Rachel : ...you like the apartment more than you like-

Myron.

Yeah, I told you he was old.

Rachel : Sit down. Sit down.


Laura : - Are you friends with him? - I can explain.

Joey?

All right. Okay.

Joey : You have got some nerve coming back here.

Joey : - I can't believe you never called me. - Excuse me?

You probably don't even remember my name. It's Joey, by the way.


Robin : And now it's time for "puppy corner,"

Robin : Some little angels looking for a new home,

Robin : Courtesy of the midtown animal shelter.


- So if we start with this salad,

this one is tam boo ba la,


I can do another 10 minute workout and burn more calories.

You can easily preview the workouts.

If you don't like a specific move,

you find it too difficult, you can change that,

and you can also tailor this app to suit your needs.

So you can set your goals to either lose weight,

get in shape, or gain muscle mass.

You can also tailor your program

so that you can choose how often you want to workout.

I go with moderate because that suits my lifestyle.

So just to give you an idea,

today's exercise included hyper extensions


Ted : Your uncle barney was always a bit of an enigma.

Ted from 2030 : In all the years we lived in new york,

Ted from 2030 : None of us had ever set foot in his apartment.

Ted from 2030 : Until one day, one of us did.

Ted from 2030 : It's a pretty good story.

Ted from 2030 : And believe it or not, alcohol did not play a role.

Ted from 2030 : It all started two weeks earlier

Ted from 2030 : At lily's housewarming.

Lily : Welcome to my new home.

Ted : Oh, wow, lily, this is...

Ted : Oh, this is all of it.


Good job!

All right, that's good.

I'm so proud of you!

- I think you got a good amount of it.

Good job.

- [Missy] High five!

See, that was so easy, huh?

We might have to do that in a few hours before bed,

but it'll make you feel a lot better.

Okay, so I was sitting over my our fire spot

watching these boys playing

and I came over to take a picture of them

and then they showed me the coolest thing ever.


Oh wait here she is, let's go check.

- It was so painful. - It was so painful?

They look perfect though.

- They look really good though.

- [Missy] I love it and you're not red at all.

- No yeah, it's not that bad, it's just,

it's so quick too, it only takes a couple minutes.

- [Missy] I know I was like, oh I'm gonna catch her

getting it and then I totally missed it.

- It was worth the pain.

- Tan?

Check. ping

- Whoo. - Nails?

- [Both] Check. ping

- Eyebrows threaded?

- [Both] Check. ping

- We're ready to get ready.

- I think we're ready to do this.

- We're ready to get ready. - Actually gonna do it.

laughing

- We're actually going to get her married today.

- Holy guacamole. - This is so weird.


of our houses but yeah I think anything

of our houses but yeah I think anything a little freshening up might did your

a little freshening up might did your

a little freshening up might did your job I'm gonna vacuum now

job I'm gonna vacuum now

job I'm gonna vacuum now [Music]

[Music]

[Music]


Beckett : The first time? You don't know me?

Tyson : No, I don't know either one of you.

Okay, fine, if you wanna play that game.


Ted : Kids, as you know,

Ted V.O. : Christmas is a time you spend with your family.

Ted V.O. : So in December of 2006, I had three options.

Ted V.O. : Spend it with my mom and her new boyfriend clint,

Ted V.O. : Spend it with my dad and his new girlfriend micro-brewing,

Ted V.O. : Or head down to staten island to spend it

Ted V.O. : With my super religious cousin stacy and her family.

Ted V.O. : So I opted for none of the above

Ted V.O. : And decided to spend christmas 2006

Ted V.O. : In manhattan...

Ted V.O. : Celebrating with my other family.

Okay, I have one last paper due at 5 : 00 p.M. Today,

So until then, I will be at the law library at school,

But I'm not to be disturbed for any reason.


Bosh-mezze.

That's the famous Persian noodle stew

for the World Noodle Tour.

Look at this, rapid fire.

We got herbal noodles,

chickpeas, we got curd going on.

Trevor and cook speaking in foreign language

Wow, Ash Reshteh.

Persian noodle stew with fried onion.

So, we've got this, another type.

- [Hamid] Ashu-la-ga-lam-kar.

- [Trevor] Ashu-la-ga-lam-kar.

With mint, and then this is the Haleem, the wheat stew.


Ted : Okay, we have to get lily out of that apartment.

Ted : Her roommate is a raccoon.

Robin : I'd offer her my place,

Robin : But I've got dogs and she's allergic.

Ted : Dogs? I live with her ex-boyfriend.

Ted : I think she's a little more allergic to that.

Robin : What about your place, barney?

Robin : I know it's shrouded in mystery,

Robin : But it's gotta have a couch.

Barney : The fortress of barnitude? No way.

Robin : Come on. She's desperate.

Barney : Hmm, normally a prerequisite for the women I bring home,

Barney : But... Pass.

Marshall arriving : One of you guys is very, very lucky


It looks like I think I might be some kind of katsu, deep fried cutlet in there

And then how do you do that you open?

Open here

And oh, it's already wrapped okay. It's like a kiwi burger all there appears to be Maine. I think that's mayonnaise in here

There's some lettuce a cutlet. There's right

Well, that's that's a heavy little handful right there


broth just absolutely fantastic hang on

broth just absolutely fantastic hang on that's really good porky flavor but

that's really good porky flavor but

that's really good porky flavor but there's not a lot of fat in dish this

there's not a lot of fat in dish this

there's not a lot of fat in dish this little gelatinous which I think comes

little gelatinous which I think comes

little gelatinous which I think comes from the the tendons and the cartilage

from the the tendons and the cartilage

from the the tendons and the cartilage so it goes in I see a litter of live

so it goes in I see a litter of live

so it goes in I see a litter of live people goes down silky smooth

people goes down silky smooth

people goes down silky smooth hello pork chop oh you got to be careful

hello pork chop oh you got to be careful with this thing treat this thing like an

with this thing treat this thing like an infant look at this it's just falling

infant look at this it's just falling

infant look at this it's just falling apart

did I just drink that I'm sorry was that gone for a second here that's the most

gone for a second here that's the most

gone for a second here that's the most incredible piece of me who had ever

incredible piece of me who had ever

incredible piece of me who had ever synced into a bowl of ramen this was

synced into a bowl of ramen this was

synced into a bowl of ramen this was made by a magician I mean how else would

made by a magician I mean how else would he explain this thing disappearing in my

he explain this thing disappearing in my mouth and me really in shock for like 20

mouth and me really in shock for like 20 seconds alright you know what before I

seconds alright you know what before I

seconds alright you know what before I go any further I gotta tried the egg

go any further I gotta tried the egg

go any further I gotta tried the egg before the yolk disappears on me I

before the yolk disappears on me I

before the yolk disappears on me I didn't know what could be creamier than

didn't know what could be creamier than

didn't know what could be creamier than this broth but that did it by far our

this broth but that did it by far our

this broth but that did it by far our best ball tonkotsu ramen pad in New York

best ball tonkotsu ramen pad in New York hands-down not even a close contest I

hands-down not even a close contest I

hands-down not even a close contest I don't even know what's better if the

don't even know what's better if the

don't even know what's better if the broth the noodles with the Splenda thing


- [Bryan] And there you go, dude.

- [Missy] Look how fly you look!

Do you like it?

Look in the mirror.

- Yeah!


You don't need me taking up all your space.

Joey : We got plenty of space. There's still some by that speaker.


these tires out all right this is my

these tires out all right this is my enemy

enemy

enemy it may not look that big but it is quite

it may not look that big but it is quite the stretch for that truck as you can

the stretch for that truck as you can

the stretch for that truck as you can see how many body lengths it is long

see how many body lengths it is long

see how many body lengths it is long that's a pretty good distance on top of

that's a pretty good distance on top of

that's a pretty good distance on top of water don't really have anywhere to go

water don't really have anywhere to go

water don't really have anywhere to go once if I do make it across where do I

once if I do make it across where do I

once if I do make it across where do I go I'm just gonna wreck into this hole I

go I'm just gonna wreck into this hole I have to try to come up this Bank

have to try to come up this Bank

have to try to come up this Bank alright guys gonna set you up right here

alright guys gonna set you up right here first attempt I'm gonna try to make it

first attempt I'm gonna try to make it

first attempt I'm gonna try to make it across no practice no more I've haven't

across no practice no more I've haven't

across no practice no more I've haven't had never done this at all with this

had never done this at all with this

had never done this at all with this truck these tires never even driven with

truck these tires never even driven with these tires until today so it should be

these tires until today so it should be

these tires until today so it should be fun let's give a shÃ¡Ã¡

that was awesome

that was awesome

that was awesome did you get it like nothing I'm not even

did you get it like nothing I'm not even kidding no effort like it just skips

kidding no effort like it just skips

kidding no effort like it just skips across that water I was like like what's

across that water I was like like what's it doing wow that's impressive


Taub : Got into the kid's bloodstream

Taub : through the cut on his forehead,

Taub : got into the drill instructor's

Taub : through some abrasions on his feet.

House : Good idea. Give them both the antitoxin.

Landon : I saw my chance to get out of here. I had to take it.

Masters : Don't make excuses. You tried to steal from me.

Landon : All these kids are manipulators.

Driscoll : You can't let your guard down.

Landon : What do you mean "all these kids"?

Landon : Don't lump me in with the losers at that camp.

Masters : Seems like you belong there. It may be your only chance.

Landon : Look, I've screwed up but I've never been in trouble with the law.

Masters [surprised] : You said you were in for shoplifting.

The store owner caught me trying to boost some chips and stuff,

Landon : called my DCS caseworker.

Masters : I thought all the kids were there under court order.

Driscoll : That's usually how it works.

Masters : So why is he different?

Nika : Why would I take a naked picture of you?

Nika : You're cute, but you're not that cute. Now please, go.

Chase : You're the only one left. You're pissed off.

Nika : I'm pissed off because you're in my apartment,

Nika : and my boyfriend might be here any minute.

Boyfriend.

The last thing I want to do is publicize that I cheated on him,

Nika : so why would I prank you?

Chase : And where was this boyfriend at the wedding?


Wilson : - Hey. - Close the door.

House : Close the door.

Wilson : Is Cuddy down the hall counting to 50?

She knows I'm in here, in the clinic, as she commanded.

House : - She just doesn't know I'm alone. - Well, you've got a full waiting room.

Wilson : - How long do you think you can ignore them? - I'm off at 4 : 00.


Raj : Boy, I'm so hungry today.

Raj : I wonder why?

Howard : Because you had sex the other night?

Raj : You know what?

Raj : That may be it.

Raj : By the way, it isn't like riding a bike.

Raj : Like, I fell off a few times.

Leonard : -Hey, buddy. -Hello.

Leonard : You okay?

Sheldon : I just got called into President Siebert's office.

Sheldon : The university won't let me switch my field

Sheldon : of study to inflationary cosmology.

Sheldon : They're forcing me to continue with string theory.

Raj : -Why? -He said it's why they hired me,

Sheldon : it's what my grant was designated for,

Sheldon : and that everybody has to do things they don't want to do.

Sheldon : He then gave an example of something he had to do,

Sheldon : even though he didn't want to, which was look at my stupid face.

Leonard : That's a rude thing to say out loud.


[Breathing apparatus hissing]

[Monitor beeping]

Bailey : OK.

Izzie : I know you probably can't hear me,

Izzie : and you're feeling this big push to go towards the light,

where everything's all halos

Izzie : and all-you-can-eat buffets and stuff.

Izzie : And, I mean, sharing your organs is really great and all.

Izzie : But I think you have a family.

Izzie : I can feel it.

So I think it'd be really great

if you could do me a favor, and... get better.

Izzie : Just...

Meredith VO : ...live.

So, you think you can give that a shot for me?

[Monitor beeping rapidly]


Randy : Yeah, I've been reading your blog for years.

Randy : You are like a god to me.

Randy : That's why tonight is going to be legendary...

Randy : Wait for it...

Randy : Dary.

Lily : Oh.

Barney : Okay, randy, let's do this.

Barney : Okay.

Barney : You ready?

Barney : Yes.


Joey : Well, maybe you should go back.

She moves in, and before you know it...

you're right where you don't want to be, back together.

I don't think so. She's already talking about dating other guys.


Raj : These spring rolls are amazing. Good job, Bernadette.

Bernadette : That's the takeout that Sheldon brought.

Raj : I'm sure they wouldn't have tasted nearly as good if I hadn't tried your food first.

Sheldon : Howard, did you want your clothes arranged seasonally or by color?

- Color's fine. - Wrong, they'll be arranged seasonally.

Penny : Aren't you gonna spend a little time with Amy?

Amy : Oh, it's okay, I'm used to it.

Amy : The other day at Whole Foods, he spent an hour optimizing the cheese aisle.

Sheldon : And some thanks I got.

Sheldon : The assistant manager chased me out with an artisanal salami.

Amy : His quirks just make you love him more.

Amy : Someone please agree with me.


this this is big chunks of lamb and look how tender this isn't see huh see how

how tender this isn't see huh see how

how tender this isn't see huh see how this just breaks off like I'm just like

this just breaks off like I'm just like

this just breaks off like I'm just like flip it and it just breaks off right

flip it and it just breaks off right

flip it and it just breaks off right there this lamb needs a fragile sticker

there this lamb needs a fragile sticker

there this lamb needs a fragile sticker oh yeah no teeth necessary then take a

oh yeah no teeth necessary then take a

oh yeah no teeth necessary then take a bite up the pickled garlic sweet garlic

bite up the pickled garlic sweet garlic

bite up the pickled garlic sweet garlic a little sour pickle eat and then take a


Oh, no, thanks. I'm going to the mall with Emma.


Sheldon : I'd love to have you join us on a double date.

Amy : Aw...

Amy : You are aware that a double date doesn't count as two dates.

Leonard : Oh.

Sheldon : Well, then come or don't.

Sheldon : I don't care.

Bernadette : I can't believe you're sore.

Howard : Hey, even professional pitchers need a rubdown after the game.

Bernadette : But they throw an actual ball.

Bernadette : You were throwing air at a TV.

Howard : For your information,

Howard : I also gave Leonard one hell of a high five.

Bernadette : I'm kind of surprised you agreed to do this

Bernadette : in front of a stadium full of people.

Howard : They're doing Space Day and NASA asked me.

Howard : I felt like I couldn't say no.

Penny : Okay.

Bernadette : Well, if you want, I could help you practice.

Bernadette : I played a lot of softball growing up.

Howard : Thank you, that would be great.

Howard : Great. And while we're at it,

Bernadette : maybe we could butch up your run

Bernadette : for when you head out to the mound.


[Music]

[Music] [Applause]


point where I kind of want to create

point where I kind of want to create something bigger like I want to do more

something bigger like I want to do more

something bigger like I want to do more like weekly movies like imagine a 90

like weekly movies like imagine a 90

like weekly movies like imagine a 90 minute vlog that comes out or even a new

minute vlog that comes out or even a new channel like like let's like I want to

channel like like let's like I want to

channel like like let's like I want to do something new like that's the honest

do something new like that's the honest

do something new like that's the honest truth like the God's honest truth I want

truth like the God's honest truth I want to do something new and fresh and big

to do something new and fresh and big

to do something new and fresh and big and like maybe more exciting I I will

and like maybe more exciting I I will

and like maybe more exciting I I will obviously always still upload videos

obviously always still upload videos

obviously always still upload videos like I want to do vlog still but I just

like I want to do vlog still but I just

like I want to do vlog still but I just right this moment three weeks could go

right this moment three weeks could go

right this moment three weeks could go by and I'm like yeah let's start daily

by and I'm like yeah let's start daily

by and I'm like yeah let's start daily vlogging again that could happen easily

vlogging again that could happen easily

vlogging again that could happen easily my mind is crazy sometimes like I I I

my mind is crazy sometimes like I I I

my mind is crazy sometimes like I I I get these ideas and I have to do it I

get these ideas and I have to do it I

get these ideas and I have to do it I have to try and right now daily vlogging

have to try and right now daily vlogging is is the old if you daily vlog that's

is is the old if you daily vlog that's

is is the old if you daily vlog that's like the only thing you can really do

like the only thing you can really do

like the only thing you can really do and I want to try like I don't know I

and I want to try like I don't know I

and I want to try like I don't know I want to try new things daily vlogging is

want to try new things daily vlogging is weird like I know I don't expect anybody

weird like I know I don't expect anybody to understand unless your daily vlogger

to understand unless your daily vlogger

to understand unless your daily vlogger like it's it's weird and you've got it

like it's it's weird and you've got it

like it's it's weird and you've got it for years it's done it for years and I

for years it's done it for years and I

for years it's done it for years and I probably will continue to do it a little

probably will continue to do it a little bit all I'm saying is like if I don't

bit all I'm saying is like if I don't

bit all I'm saying is like if I don't upload tomorrow I like just make that


S05E01 Definitions

Lily : So, how long has this been going on?

Barney : All summer.

Lily : I knew it!

Lily : I knew it! I knew it!

Lily : You guys are boyfriend and girlfriend.

Whoa, hey. Whoa.

Wow, no. Whoa...

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Lily. Girlfriend?

Robin : Slow your roll there, Lilypad. Yeah, yeah.

Lily : You've been together all summer. I don't get it.

Okay, it's like this.

Robin : After we kissed, we sat down to have the talk.

Robin : We should figure out what this is.


Another boy : where's your hat and your whip?

Ted : They're at home. I...

Another girl : And where are your pants?


Marshall : I don't think that's gonna be a problem.

Barney : Marshall, do you know how the myth of mermaids came to be?

Marshall : I'm sorry. Myth?

Barney : It was 300 years ago.

Sailors stuck at sea would get desperate

for female companionship.

It got so bad that, eventually,

the manatees out in the water started to look like...


Endocarditis. His heart's infected.

House : Little bacteria cauliflowers, clinging to his valves.

House : Except sometimes they can't hold on. They go swimming in his bloodstream.

House : Thursday, one breaks off, goes to his right hand,

House : black fingers, gangrene.

House : Friday's child heads for the kidneys.

And we all know what Saturdays are all about.

House : Party with the left hand.

House : Also explains the fever.

Cuddy : It's perfect except for the little fact

that we already tested for endocarditis,

Cuddy : and he was negative.

Which means he either is negative or...

What infection can cause pneumonia and culture-negative endocarditis?

House : Prize value goes down with every clue.


ADDISON : - He's up to something. - I'm not.

I came here to fight over CDs and books. War over a crystal vase.

- What are you up to? - The divorce is my fault.

DEREK : - Let me take responsibility. - We both had affairs.

You had a one-night stand with Mark.

Derek, actually... Well, it was...

All right. OK. It was two... two nights. You made a mistake.

DEREK : Meredith and I, we had a relationship.

DEREK : Make these changes and I'll sign it today.

MEREDITH : - You weren't supposed to be in here. - You shouldn't have had to see that.

No, it's fine. I'm fine.

IZZIE : Clearly the doctor thing was not working for me.

IZZIE : So go about your business. Run labs, cure cancer. I'm fine.


Taub : She didn't complain about a headache.

If the bleeding is in her gut, could be Zollinger-Ellison.

Adams : Acid reflux causes asthma, and the acid erodes the stomach, causing the bleeding.


- [Bryan] Bare hands

Where is he?

- [Missy] There's two in there.


with my i'm antinea really we can turn

with my i'm antinea really we can turn off snow mode back to you adaptive fun

off snow mode back to you adaptive fun

off snow mode back to you adaptive fun mode


where the bench came from it just kind

where the bench came from it just kind of appeared here and I sat down loving

of appeared here and I sat down loving

of appeared here and I sat down loving it so many friends oh my god say hello

I think you guys are how old it how old

I think you guys are how old it how old

I think you guys are how old it how old are you I think you are almost the same

are you I think you are almost the same

are you I think you are almost the same age okay so it's made from rice flour

that's a lot of honey that's really good really sweet

really sweet

really sweet they're like fluffy pancakes made from

they're like fluffy pancakes made from

they're like fluffy pancakes made from rye flour

rye flour

rye flour it's called Zoey oh and aqua is made

it's called Zoey oh and aqua is made

it's called Zoey oh and aqua is made from peanut spices

from peanut spices

from peanut spices Wow it looks like an amazing texture

Wow it looks like an amazing texture

Wow it looks like an amazing texture thank you


Mindy getting this bit MIDI now this is

Mindy getting this bit MIDI now this is my son my son of Ikon me my second day

my son my son of Ikon me my second day

my son my son of Ikon me my second day at school son of a gun

at school son of a gun

at school son of a gun sorry Eduardo bad habit but Hubble is

sorry Eduardo bad habit but Hubble is

sorry Eduardo bad habit but Hubble is English oh my goodness sometimes this

English oh my goodness sometimes this

English oh my goodness sometimes this little fella looks like he's got red

little fella looks like he's got red

little fella looks like he's got red hair and green eyes sometimes this

hair and green eyes sometimes this

hair and green eyes sometimes this little fella looks against our plant and

little fella looks against our plant and blue eyes

blue eyes

blue eyes hopes it won't be with the compy huh

hopes it won't be with the compy huh

hopes it won't be with the compy huh well you're kidding without me you

well you're kidding without me you

well you're kidding without me you reckon my little friend we gonna be you

reckon my little friend we gonna be you

reckon my little friend we gonna be you got a beauty grow up huh

got a beauty grow up huh

got a beauty grow up huh you owe me a little man Oh me no man huh

you owe me a little man Oh me no man huh today we need to go and actually get you

today we need to go and actually get you their photographs done for his pasta

their photographs done for his pasta

their photographs done for his pasta port a because he's going on her hair a

port a because he's going on her hair a

port a because he's going on her hair a plane you wanna know paints doing is

plane you wanna know paints doing is

plane you wanna know paints doing is they're gonna go to Italy me but it's

they're gonna go to Italy me but it's

they're gonna go to Italy me but it's been a long time hmm are we gonna do you

been a long time hmm are we gonna do you want to belong yeah and you guys think


13 : Nothing on the biopsy.

House : And how is he?

13 : His fever's at 106...

House : I know.

House : But how is he?

House : Bitter? Sexually frustrated?

13 : He's delightful.

13 : Loves the smell of freshly baked rhubarb pie and isn't afraid to love.

13 : Also, his rash is coming back.

Kutner : He needs the meds and the tub. Just to keep him stable.

House : Fine. Soak him again.

Kutner : He'll be happy. Loves hot tubs.

House : No. You love hot tubs.

House : Find the rest of the gang. Tell them to meet me at the lecture hall.

I hate hot tubs.


a, uh, coyote wearing a little hard hat

more than me, remember :

Zoey's protest could still shut your whole project down.

Barney : Oh, come on. Zoey's not shutting anything down,

Barney : standing out there with her stupid megaphone,

Barney : screaming in the wind; butt cheeks trembling with fury;

Barney : her perky breasts heaving;

Barney : her self-righteous nipples...

Ted : Dude, that's my girlfriend.

Barney : Point is, we are taking her and The Arcadian down.

Barney : Am I right, Teddy Westside?

Ted : You know it. Ha-ha!


Amy : Which word's tripping you up?

Assuage or aItruism?

Penny : Both.

Bernadette : You'll feel better by doing something nice for someone.

- Oh, I actually knew that. - I never doubted you.

Bernadette : Every other week, I serve at a soup kitchen downtown.

Penny : Ooh. I can't do that.

Penny : If I stand over a steaming pot, my hair just goes : "Boing!"

- Ah. What else can I do? - There's Habitat for Humanity.

Amy : Building houses for the poor.

I don't have my own house, I'm gonna build one for someone else?

Amy : How about donating some of your clothes?

Oh, my God, that's perfect, because I have so many clothes I don't wear.

They're taking up space I go shopping to buy more.


-Stevie's a family friend. -Oh, my God. That's amazing.

Woman : -I'd love to see pictures. -Yeah, so would I.

You wouldn't think Annie Liebowitz would forget to put film in the camera.

Ross : Would you excuse us for a second?


and then you come all the way to the back corner

and it's kind of just like a little hidden door,

but very beautiful Japanese...


Doug : How can you be so...

I mean, I.. I can't get around a...

Doug : No, no. You're not cutting off my foot.

Sir, diabetes is a manageable disease. If you had been here even a month ago,

- maybe we could've- - Okay, so I screwed up.

Doug : But you're telling me that this is my only option

because I'm late getting in here?

Doug : - That there is no way... - Mr. Kendry...

Doug : No!

Doug : Please. There's gotta be a way for me to get that month back.

Tell me what to do. I'll do it. I'll do every line of every plan you give me.

I'll do it. Please.

Doug : You gotta find a way to save my foot.


Amy : If you don't mind me asking, why did you and your wife split up?

Dave : Oh, you know how it is... we wanted different things.

Dave : I wanted children,

Dave : and she wanted a pastry chef named Jean-Philippe.

Amy : Oh, I'm... I'm so sorry.

No, it's-it's fine. It's why I left England.

Dave : It reminded me too much of her.

Dave : Cold, gloomy and easily accessed by a Frenchman through a tunnel.

Penny : Hey. So, where are they?

Bernadette : Across the street, in the left window.

PENNY : Oh, damn it,

Penny : we should have brought binoculars.

Bernadette : Right here.

We just happen to have those in the car?


This noodle dish is called laping

and it's made from, it's this blob,

a very jelly-ish blob of mung bean.

Not even noodle yet but it's a blob of mung bean

and as she slices it off,

you can just see it, like wobble and wiggle.

But, she slices some off,

she puts it into your bowl,

she adds on some seasoning

and then she adds on some pickled vegetables

and then she adds on some chilies, some green onions,

some kinda brothy sauce that smells really good,

that looks really good.

But, that, like, shaking blob of mung bean.

That's great.

speaking in foreign language


the restaurant was right across the

the restaurant was right across the street from the market so this is the

street from the market so this is the

street from the market so this is the entrance of the market here and already

entrance of the market here and already

entrance of the market here and already you can see a lot of wholesale a lot of

you can see a lot of wholesale a lot of

you can see a lot of wholesale a lot of big big bags of potatoes and vegetables


Cameron : It's none of my business.

She's a good person, and we've just been together so long, I...

Hannah : I'm tired of her.

It sounds terrible, doesn't it?


vegetables here man that's some of the

vegetables here man that's some of the most tasty I've ever had this mushroom

most tasty I've ever had this mushroom

most tasty I've ever had this mushroom is absolutely off the hook there's juicy

is absolutely off the hook there's juicy love how they paired it with the tomato

love how they paired it with the tomato

love how they paired it with the tomato which gives it just a nice bit of

which gives it just a nice bit of

which gives it just a nice bit of sweetness and acidity

sweetness and acidity

sweetness and acidity oh man steak I think I love this date

oh man steak I think I love this date

oh man steak I think I love this date huh - roasted yeah yeah I cooked this a

huh - roasted yeah yeah I cooked this a

huh - roasted yeah yeah I cooked this a little too long that's not there flies

little too long that's not there flies

little too long that's not there flies my fault oh that's right I show you you

my fault oh that's right I show you you

my fault oh that's right I show you you know what this might go really good with

know what this might go really good with some pineapple

some pineapple

some pineapple [Music]

[Music]

[Music] give that by the roundel plot oh yeah

give that by the roundel plot oh yeah

give that by the roundel plot oh yeah thank you

thank you

thank you this is Punjabi lemon dungaree and this

this is Punjabi lemon dungaree and this

this is Punjabi lemon dungaree and this was just brought over to my table look

was just brought over to my table look

was just brought over to my table look at this oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah


Rachel : Chandler, Mon, there's only one banana-nut muffin left.

Monica : I ordered mine first.

Yeah, but I'm so much faster.

Monica : Give it to me.

No.

Monica : Give it to me!

Okay, you can have it.


Nathan Fillion : Oh, yeah, I get it-- you think I'm Nathan Fillion,

Nathan Fillion : but I'm not.

Nathan Fillion : So if you don't mind, I would just love to eat my lunch.

Raj : Come on.

Leonard : Sorry to bother you.

Raj : Don't know why he's so grumpy.

Raj : I got mistaken for that guy in Life of Pi once,

Raj : and I'm still floating.

Amy : Sheldon, it's me.

Penny : Oh, hey.

D-Did you see that?

I-I figured out how to open the door all by myself.

Maybe I'll fling some feces around my cage to celebrate.

Amy : What are you talking about?

Penny : I know you've been giving me secret puzzle tests.


Barney : I'm ready, bob.

Bob : Do it! Do it!


and chimney system for the outside street stall.


- Yeah.

You know who I bet has a really cool swimming pool?

- What?

Iron Man.

- Iron Man.

- Would that be cool to go to

a pool party at Iron Man's house?

- Yeah.

- That'd be pretty cool.

- King?

- Ooh, yeah, you actually swam in a king's swimming pool,

didn't you?

- Yeah.

- Yeah, when we went to Vegas with Mommy, huh?

Yeah, if you guys did not know, we did a quick little

trip through Vegas, and Missy actually filmed a vlog

for her channel because she is relaunching her channel.

She's doing something really cool over there

and you guys have to check it out to see what she's doing,

so be sure to click the icon in the corner of the screen

and click her channel and go subscribe to it

because there's gonna be some really cool, fun videos

up there too.

- [Bryan] Whoa. Ollie, are you excited for Momma's channel?

- Yeah.

- [Bryan] Yeah. You guys are gonna do some cool stuff, huh?

What are you measuring, by the way?

What is this?

- It's a little tape measurer.

- [Bryan] Can you measure something

and show me how it works?

Here, measure this PS4 controller, Ollie.

- It's about that big.


-Yeah. -A little relieved, I gotta say.

Look, Rach, I'm sorry, okay? I was a stupid kid, okay?

Ross : -The only reason I joined.. -Cofounded.

Cofounded.

Ross : Cofounded the club, was that I was in love with you.

I didn't handle it very well. If you think about it, the "I Hate Rachel Club"..


Sheldon : It worked.

Sheldon : It really worked.

Sheldon : They said I was mad, but it worked.

Sheldon : Oh, no, not Morlocks.

Sheldon : Not flesh-eating Morlocks.

Help!


Oh, come on! Come on!

[Grunting]

Come on!

[Panting]


Wow. l really love your--

-ls something wrong? -No, it's just....

lt just feels so good...

...lkea.

Hey, say, you'll know this. What's the capital of Sweden?


Amy : I'm so glad you like it.

Sheldon : I'm prepared to say I love it,

Sheldon : as soon as I confirm there are no hobos aboard.

Sheldon : OK.

Leonard on phone : Raj, I got it.

Leonard on phone : Bye.

Leonard on phone : That was your daddy.

Leonard on phone : He wanted me to say that he misses-- Why am I doing this?

Happy Valentine's Day!

Leonard : Flowers and chocolates?

Leonard : Somebody's trying to get me out of my panties.

Penny : Don't be surprised if you find five chocolates missing

Penny : and three gross coconut ones with a bite taken out.

Penny : It came that way when I bought it.

Leonard : Got you a little something, too.

Oh, jewelry!


Beckett : leaving the crime scene.

Marcus : Me? It wasn't me. Are you crazy? I would never hurt Ana.

You attacked her on the set, in front of the entire crew.

Marcus : Yeah, but that whole thing was staged.

Beckett : That is hard to believe.

Marcus : No, I'm telling you, it's true.

Marcus : Ana came to me.

Marcus : She said she needed me to start that fight with her.

Marcus : She paid me $3,000

because she knew that it would cost me my job.

But she even promised to give me a better one in a few weeks.

Beckett : Why would she pay you to attack her?

Marcus : She said she needed to get away for a couple days.

Marcus : But the show wouldn't give her any time off.

Marcus : So she had me cause that scene.

Beckett : So she did all of that to skip out on work? Why?

Marcus : I don't know. She'd gotten real secretive lately.

Marcus : Taking meetings and not telling me what they were for.

Marcus : She was up to something.

Marcus : Maybe whatever it was is what got her killed.

Marcus' alibi checks out.

Beckett : Street cams caught him in SoHo at the time of the murder.


Castle : Well, that was a pretty big rock he put on her finger.

Castle : With the fake identity he had set up, the county clerk's office

Castle : never would have flagged him for someone who was already married.

Beckett : Yeah, but Sam was pretending to be Jake before he met Sarah.

Beckett : - I don't understand the fake identity. - Maybe to land the job?

Beckett : I understand fibbing on your resume, but changing your identity?

Beckett : The math doesn't quite add up for me.

Castle : You know what math doesn't add up for me?

Castle : - Two wives. - One wife too many for you?

Castle : Two wives too many.

Beckett : Seems like the common denominator in that equation is you.

Castle : Good news.

Castle : I'm finally embracing the lecture you gave me

Castle : on the importance of organic food.

Alexis : You made my lunch?

Castle : You think I'm gonna let you risk your life

Castle : on the vending machines and stale donuts of the break...


Sheldon : ...apparently we're just two peas in a pod.

Uh, a regular pea...

Sheldon : ...and the kind of pea that comes along once, maybe twice in a generation.

Sheldon : Rain. Another great equalizer.

Sheldon : Falling on the head of the brilliant and the unremarkable alike.


Howard : It's right there on the screen.

Howard : Austria does look like a wiener.

Raj : That's nothing, dude.

Raj : Go check out how hung Florida is.

laughing

Leonard : I'm sure Mrs. Florida's walking funny.

Leonard : Can we get back to work?

Sheldon : Yeah... he's right.

Sheldon : Oh, here's a thought.

Sheldon : What if we use some form of operant conditioning techniques

Sheldon : to keep us from getting off topic?

Howard : Like behavior modification?

Sheldon : Yeah, exactly.

Sheldon : Did you know

Sheldon : those techniques were used to actually teach pigeons

Sheldon : to play ping-pong?

Raj : That cannot be true.

ping-pong ball bouncing


House : It's easy to miss.

House : But you can see the blood build up here.

House : Your son would have died that day

House : on a bus, in school, sitting on his bed.

House : The only thing the crash is killing is you.

House : We need to repair that syrinx in your neck.


Meredith : - How's Burke doing? - I don't know.

Alex : He just had surgery yesterday and you don't know how he's doing?

Meredith : - They're not speaking. - Thought they made up.

Meredith : They did, sort of.

Izzie : - But she's still not speaking to him? - He's not speaking to me.

Meredith : - They're not speaking to each other. - OK.

Christina : Did you ask Derek about Burke's hand?

Meredith : I don't want to get in the middle. Derek and I are happy.

Could we just keep it that way?

You could swallow your pride and ask him yourself.

Alex : - Her gut's not big enough for that. - Oh, Alex, that hurt me.

There's Georgie.

Everyone, quiet down!


You guys, I just found an egg sitting up here,

I don't know how long it's been sitting there,

I think I'm gonna check to see if it's bad,

but that's too eggs now.

Aaaaah!

I hope this one's okay still.

Alright, so I've got my two eggs,

this one's the one that was just laid today

and this one has been out for a few days

sitting on that ledge,

and I know there's a test

where if you drop an egg into water,

I believe if it sinks it's still good,

if it floats it's bad, like, don't eat it.

I think that's how it goes,

all I know is that this one is the good one,

so let's see what it does.

kids yelling

Okay, yeah, so like I thought,

this is a good egg and it sunk.

So as long as this egg sinks too and doesn't float,


- I'm canceling dinner. - No.

I thought maybe you could just invite a few more people.

Foreman : An infectious agent's molecular structure

Foreman : can resemble the spinal cord's.

And when the immune system attacks the infection,


okay I'll go on two four six six my

okay I'll go on two four six six my heart comment stop what game is it I've

heart comment stop what game is it I've

heart comment stop what game is it I've never played it

never played it

never played it oh sure no you have to show me oh yeah

oh sure no you have to show me oh yeah

oh sure no you have to show me oh yeah this is probably better play yeah this

this is probably better play yeah this

this is probably better play yeah this is up if you guys ever seen 52 pickup

is up if you guys ever seen 52 pickup

is up if you guys ever seen 52 pickup gunshot Jesus


Richard : - What's going on? - I tried, but you wouldn't listen.

It is now 6 : 07. The second shift nurses start at six. They're not coming in.

Do you know what a sick out will do to this hospital?

Debbie : I've already put in the call for temps.

Richard : - What's this? - Notification.

We go on strike in ten days.

Alex : Doing good, Yumi. You're doing just fine.

Izzie : We should get the translator. She doesn't understand.

Izzie : We'll be back.

Alex : What the hell are you doing here?


Monica : - Uh-oh. Uh-oh. - What?

Monica : We left Joey alone with the food.

Monica : Yep, yep, I knew it.

Monica : There he is...

Monica : ...feeding stuffing to a dog!


I'll put this on top of my flute oekaki

I'll put this on top of my flute oekaki rice half brown half white rice

rice half brown half white rice

rice half brown half white rice there's Buddha kaki which are the

there's Buddha kaki which are the

there's Buddha kaki which are the seaweed flakes and sesame seeds all over

seaweed flakes and sesame seeds all over it

Oh Sherman is fantastic the natural

Oh Sherman is fantastic the natural

Oh Sherman is fantastic the natural flavor of that salmon kind of a light

flavor of that salmon kind of a light

flavor of that salmon kind of a light I think sesame kind of marinate on it oh

I think sesame kind of marinate on it oh here comes some more stellar B wasters


Sheldon : How much will it hurt?

Amy : It's just a tiny skin sample.


the easiest ways just push her in you

the easiest ways just push her in you know my grandpa told me back when he was

know my grandpa told me back when he was in the when he served in the army he

in the when he served in the army he

in the when he served in the army he didn't have to swim either and they push

didn't have to swim either and they push the rod off a ledge no they went back to


and Greek tzatziki, yogurt with dill

and lemon and an olive in the middle.

So first things first, we're gonna go in


Greg Page : We came up here to help him.

Ty Page : Got out the joint for good behavior.

Ty Page : Dude called us up, said he needed a savior.

Castle : Stop rapping.

Castle : I'll buy the album.

Savior?

Greg Page : Yeah. His daughter got back into drugs.

Greg Page : He needed to make things right, so he called us.

Beckett : The two of you robbed Hixton at gunpoint in Florida.

Beckett : Why would he call you?

Greg Page : When Hixton realized what kind of trouble Nicole was in,

Greg Page : he knew we were the only people he could turn to.

Beckett : And what could you possibly do to help his daughter with her addiction?

Greg Page : Problem wasn't the drugs, it was her dealer.

A cat named Oz.

Greg Page : Nicole was under his spell something fierce.

Greg Page : When Hixton found out about it, he went to go see Oz.

Greg Page : Told the man, "Stay away from my daughter."

Greg Page : When Oz didn't, he called us.

Greg Page : You don't believe me, look in my wallet.

Ryan : Looks like Nicole lied to me

Ryan : when she told me she didn't recognize him.

Beckett : It's the guy Hixton had under surveillance.

Beckett : Is this Oz?


sacred and holy dynamite sticks it's

sacred and holy dynamite sticks it's gonna be about a 30-minute drive the

gonna be about a 30-minute drive the

gonna be about a 30-minute drive the first place we're going to is called

first place we're going to is called

first place we're going to is called it's called taquitos Gilberto

it's called taquitos Gilberto

it's called taquitos Gilberto technically Gilbert roof Lisa hill

technically Gilbert roof Lisa hill

technically Gilbert roof Lisa hill better stanky sake like a taco party

better stanky sake like a taco party

better stanky sake like a taco party okay that's what we're gonna have

[Music]

oh I can smell it as soon as you step

oh I can smell it as soon as you step

oh I can smell it as soon as you step out of the carcass really in the

out of the carcass really in the

out of the carcass really in the neighborhood

[Music]

[Music]


Amy : There was water everywhere.

Amy : It was such a mess.

Leonard : That stinks. How long are you out of the apartment?

Amy : About five weeks.

Ugh! Did you lose anything valuable?

Amy : Well, the pipe was over my closet,

Amy : so all my clothes are gone.

Penny : Oh, so nothing. Great.

Penny : Do they know why the pipe burst?

Amy : They didn't say.

Leonard : Buildings that have a combination

Leonard : of copper and galvanized steel

Leonard : are susceptible to pinholes and corrosion

Leonard : caused by the mobility of ions in the water.

Leonard : Can't have your head shoved in a toilet as much as I did

Leonard : and not pick up a few things about plumbing.

Penny : Well, if you need a place to crash, you can stay with us.

- Really? - Of course.

Penny : You can stay in Leonard's room, and we'll stay at my place.

Amy : You're sure that's not an inconvenience?

Penny : No, not at all.

Leonard : And we live with Sheldon,

so the word "inconvenience" has really lost all meaning.

Amy : So, technically, I'd be moving in with my boyfriend?

Penny : I guess so.

Penny : I'd finally get to live alone with my husband.

Amy : Oh, my, this is a big step.

Leonard : Mm-hmm.

Leonard : For two of us, it's in the right direction.


You are setting sail up the Hudson. You've got the wind in your... arms.

Rachel : You get all that peace and quiet you've always wanted.

Rachel : You get back to nature. You can go fishing.

You get one of those hats. People call you captain.

And then when you're old, Cappy.

-It's for a good cause. All right. -No way! It's mine!

What?

-The stuff you said, I want that! -But you don't have $20,000!

Who cares? I'll make payments! I want the Mr. Bowmont!

-Oh, my God. You're back. -Let me see it. Let me see your hand.

Why do you wanna see my hand?

I wanna see what's in your hand. I wanna see the trash.


Ted : I'm glad we're in a serious relationship.

Ted : Right away.

Ted : And if I screw this up, I'm the devil,

Ted : because she's going through a divorce. But I'm not gonna screw this up.

Ted : So stop freaking out.

Ted : Stop freaking out!

Kids, I'm not super proud of what I did next.

Ted : I'm here to help Marshall.

Meanwhile, as Desperation Day turned into Desperation Night...

Barney : God, these girls are so hungry for male attention.

Barney : It is like being a hunter

Barney : and having the deer walk up, tie itself to the hood of your car

Barney : and beg to get mounted.


Who would trade sex for beer?

Carl : Only if you're into it.

Carl : It's on me.


Barney throwing a ball at the TV : Want to play some catch, pop?

Barney : So now I'm gonna go to l.A., be on the show,

Barney : Win the showcase showdown,

Barney : Make him proud of me,

Barney : And then tell him who I am.

Ted : You're gonna tell bob barker

Ted : That you're his son on national television?

Barney : Why is this so hard for you people to believe?

Robin : Drop the popper!

Robin : Lily has to gain

Robin : Five pounds in a week and a half,

Robin : And it is my job to help her get there.

Lily : This is the best wedding diet ever.

Lily : I lost a pound.

Robin : That is impossible.

Robin : You ate mcdonald's every meal for three days.

Lily : I knew that super size me guy was full of it.

Robin : Well, it must be the wedding stress.

Robin : We just got to up the intake.

Robin : Lily aldrin, drop and give me 20 bites of fudge!


unlimited amount of time you're going to be pregnant for a lot at that time

be pregnant for a lot at that time

be pregnant for a lot at that time you're going to have to live with my

you're going to have to live with my

you're going to have to live with my character for a lot of that time so when


Hey! What are you doing here?

You know, this building's on my paper route, so...


Joey : Look down.

Joey : Look down.

[scene : - Chandler? - Yeah?


Thank you. I won't let you down.

Narrator : So uncle barney began the search for a new wingman.

Pete! Barney stinson.

Hey, I've been meaning to call you. It's been a while.

Barney : Yeah, yeah, so listen.

Barney : You should meet me at maclaren's tonight.

You're never gonna believe this : I'm at the hospital.

Pitt : Just had a baby daughter.

So what do you think, 9 : 30, 10 : 00?


lt's just you. l thought someone was swinging a bag of cats against the wall.

Phoebe : You'd better get back in that kitchen. The garlic's not gonna overuse itself.

-Okay, you have to stop playing now. -Why?


I hooked Ross and Chandler up with tuxedos. Do you need one?

No, I'm not wearing a tux.

- What are you gonna wear? - Multi-colored robes.

Joey : And maybe a hat.

Rachel : - Does Monica know about this? - No.

Rachel : Can I please be there when you tell her?

Phoebe : You want to go to a movie tonight?

I'm having dinner with Melissa.

Joey : Can I come?

I won't talk. You'll just hear my video camera.

- What? What's going on? - Can I tell her?

Do you want what happened, or Joey's lewd version?

- Joey's. - Okay.

I had this college friend...

...and I made the mistake of telling Joey that one time...

...she and I, you know, kissed a little bit.


Joshua : -Hey, Rachel. -Hi.


Leonard : Penny's not answering my texts.

Bernadette : Who cares? Focus on the game.

Leonard : This stupid game is why she's mad in the first place.

Leonard : -I'm telling her I'm quitting. -No!

Bernadette : Quitting would be the worst thing for your relationship.

Howard : Why?

Bernadette : Because it would make you seem like something she already thinks you are.

Leonard : -What does she think I am? -How do I put this?

Bernadette : She's been known to call you a name that usually applies to a lady part.

Bernadette : Or a cat.

Bernadette : Or a willow.

Leonard : I can't believe she would say that about mo.

Bernadette : If you're gonna cry about it, theres tissues in my purse.

Bernadette : Unless you got some in yours. Big willow.

J' SINGING NEIL DIAMOND'S "AMERICA" J'


Beckett : get himself into?

Beckett : Castle and I'll go to his firm.

Beckett : You guys see if you can track down any antique gun enthusiasts

Beckett : on social media sites or local clubs.

Beckett : Maybe someone from Goldstein's life'll pop.

Ryan : You got it.

Beckett : You know, I just don't get how someone could shoot Goldstein,

Beckett : steal his clothes, and then not hang onto his wallet.

Beckett : Just doesn't make any sense.

No.

Beckett : Maybe giant moths killed him and ate his clothes.

Castle : Could be.

Beckett : Hey! Castle,


Yusuf oh honey what get into the mug

Yusuf oh honey what get into the mug

Yusuf oh honey what get into the mug just hand here

just hand here

just hand here yeah sit get the stick and try to fist

yeah sit get the stick and try to fist

yeah sit get the stick and try to fist me

me

me there you go oh hey get a stick 9 I will

there you go oh hey get a stick 9 I will be in your back don't worry ok yes ok

be in your back don't worry ok yes ok

be in your back don't worry ok yes ok yes yes yes Veronica tell father


a baby you threw up all over my face but all up as well did you like being a baby

all up as well did you like being a baby did we do a good job raising you know

what did I do

what did I do

what did I do you gave me nothing what just one

you gave me nothing what just one

you gave me nothing what just one picture for me that picture would yeah

picture for me that picture would yeah

picture for me that picture would yeah aunt and uncle

aunt and uncle

aunt and uncle and make me think that you look like a

and make me think that you look like a

and make me think that you look like a less yeah well she they think that LSE


absolutely adore on pizza now honey I

absolutely adore on pizza now honey I mean just look at the curves on this

mean just look at the curves on this

mean just look at the curves on this baby something that was sound really

baby something that was sound really

baby something that was sound really creepy otherwise but I'm pizza this is

creepy otherwise but I'm pizza this is

creepy otherwise but I'm pizza this is like the sexiest thing on a pizza

like the sexiest thing on a pizza

like the sexiest thing on a pizza whether it's a curvy pepperoni or a

whether it's a curvy pepperoni or a

whether it's a curvy pepperoni or a Kirby supper shot up just with that a

Kirby supper shot up just with that a

Kirby supper shot up just with that a little bit of oil trapped inside Oh Mike

little bit of oil trapped inside Oh Mike just won that one

just won that one

just won that one fight up the supper shot up I know I got


everything such a slow cooking pot

everything such a slow cooking pot desolate tomatoes and chilies and wild

desolate tomatoes and chilies and wild

desolate tomatoes and chilies and wild herbs are so natural oh well

herbs are so natural oh well

herbs are so natural oh well [Music]

[Music]

[Music] next up for the rabbits dude she just

next up for the rabbits dude she just

next up for the rabbits dude she just gave me an entire drumstick a rabbit

gave me an entire drumstick a rabbit

gave me an entire drumstick a rabbit drumstick and that's like the size of a

drumstick and that's like the size of a

drumstick and that's like the size of a chicken it has to be like double the

chicken it has to be like double the

chicken it has to be like double the size of any other rabbit I've ever seen

size of any other rabbit I've ever seen

size of any other rabbit I've ever seen it's huge


Gates : to stay away from this case?


that steak is so good yeah you actually

that steak is so good yeah you actually don't need sauce because it's so

don't need sauce because it's so

don't need sauce because it's so flavorful on its own but I do want to


- Mm-hmm.

- [Missy] I'm so happy and so proud of you,

you're such a good boy. laughs

toy playing "Jingle Bells"

- singing gibberish

- Finn, that was very good singing.


But there's only room for one, so one of you will have to stay at Joey's.

Since the fire was kind of my fault, you should get to stay here.


echoing : To Mars!

Sheldon : Afterwards, Leonard blew his nose,

Sheldon : and pie came out.

LEONARD : Right there, right there,

Oh, God, that's it!


George : Tony died.

George : He's dead.

George : Gloria...

...I am so sorry. - Thank you.

Derek : Please...

Bailey : ...go away.

[GIoria sobbing]

[Derek] I promised I'd make her look cool.

Derek : Being a bald beauty queen is the worst thing

Derek : that happened in the history of the world.

Meredith : Did you choose me for the surgery because I slept with you?


[Chuckles]

Allison.

Her... her name is Allison.

Allison.

[Burke] I think I may have found the cause of our rupture.


Marshall : - What number is this? - I'm up on burners, playa.

Barney : Too many crazies had my old number, so now I'm all about disposable phones.

Barney : I'll use one for a while, have my fun, then dump it and get a new one.

Barney : And then I'll do the same with my phone.

Marshall : So Robin told me about this whole Ted and Zoey thing.

Barney : Dude, she doesn't know how to tell a story. I'll tell you that story.

Zoey : - This is my cousin... - Honey.

Marshall : - Robin's version was... - That is exactly how it happened.

Barney : So Ted did his best to impress her,

but as per us', he bored the pants very much on her.

Ted : Blah, blah, blah, I'm an architect.


Marshall : the game last night?

Robin : Yeah. Nail-biter.

NARRATOR : ...and cold weather sports.

Marshall : You know what's fun? Mm.

Marshall : Is cold weather sports.

Robin : They are fun.

NARRATOR : They blew through them all in the first 16 seconds.

ROBIN : Man, this is awkward.

MARSHALL : She's giving me nothing!

He's just staring at me!

She's just staring at me!

It's making me nervous.

Great, now my left eye is twitching.

Marshall, it's cool.

She doesn't see it.

What the hell's going on with his eye?

Am I supposed to not talk about that?

Great, now my right eye is doing it.

Waiter : Can I get you two some drinks?


- Yeah. - Grab the next one out.

- This one I think is a little insensitive

to those who fought at the battle of Hogwart's,

but it's still yummy all the same.

What is it? - It's a sucker.


Shopkeeper : - You? - Didn't see that one coming, did you?

Leonard : Oh, yeah? Well, you're not gonna see this coming.

- Aah! - Oh, my God! Oh, my God, are you okay?

Penny : - What the hell do you have in there? - My wallet, keys...


-It's all my fault. -No, it's mine.

Why did I whoo-hoo?

Monica : Was I hoping he'd turn around and say...

... " I Iove that sound. I must have you now"?

I wish there was something we could do.


Ryan : Her body was found less than two hours ago.

Castle : Oh, my God.

Esposito : Listen, Taylor, if you want to stay out of prison,

Esposito : now's the time to tell us the truth.

Beckett : Ms. Haskins, welcome back.

Beckett : You seem to be representing everyone in this matter.

Aubrey : Before we begin,

Neely : Mr. Whitfield is here only because

Aubrey : you said you have information on his wife's whereabouts.

Beckett : Cole, you said that you spoke with Eva this morning.

Beckett : What did she say?

Cole : She said it was over and that she was leaving town.

Aubrey : Detective, did you find Mrs. Whitfield or not?

Beckett : Oh, we found her.

Beckett : In the Hudson. Murdered by you.

Cole : That's a lie.

Beckett : Taylor gave you up.

Beckett : She said that you weren't with her last night.

Aubrey : You spoke to my client without me?

Beckett : She waived her right.

Neely : Mr. Whitfield, if you weren't with Taylor

Beckett : last night, then where were you?

Aubrey : Don't answer that.

Aubrey : Are you pressing charges?

Beckett : Inevitably, yeah.

Aubrey : Cole, let's go.


Amy : Sheldon, what are you doing here?

Sheldon : You didn't respond to any of my electronic communications.

Amy : I wanted to be alone.

Sheldon : Would you like to talk about it?

And keep in mind that "no" is a perfectly viable answer.

Leonard : Sheldon, my world is crumbling around me.

Sheldon : Point of order.

Sheldon : As you're in distress...

Sheldon : ...it would be customary for me to offer you a hot beverage.

Sheldon : But I'm a guest in your home...

Sheldon : ...so it would be customary for you to offer me a beverage.


Ted : Sorry, buddy, it's a "no" for me, too.

Ted : Oh, and by the way, bel biv devoe called.

Ted : Even they don't want those pants back.

Marshall : They were insanely comfortable!

Marshall : They were like pajamas you could wear outside.

Barney : Marshall, it's over.

Barney : We even gave you an appeal

Barney : And they didn't look any better with combat boots.

Lily : All right, well, let's hear the arguments.

Lily : Ted, you go first.

Ted : Okay. The fact that I still have things from ex-girlfriends

Ted : Is no big deal.

Ted : I mean, when I see the phone booth on the piano,

Ted : I don't think of jeannie radford,

Ted : I think of the good times I had backpacking through europe.

Ted : And when I see the lamp, I don't think of allison moses.

Ted : I remember when I was broke, just out of college,

Ted : And I really needed a lamp.

Ted : And when I see that throw pillow,

Ted : I don't think of lauren stein.

Ted : I think of that weird orange-brown stain

Ted : And how it got there.

Marshall : Creamsicle and turkey gravy,

Marshall : Not at the same time.

Robin : Well, that's adorable,

Robin : But from now on, when I walk into the apartment,

Robin : Here is what I will see.