Laura's suggestion is interesting.  I'm sure it works for some but personally I hate when people ask me lots of questions in order to make conversation.  Therefore I also avoid asking others too many questions because you never know when you're hitting a sore spot.  Like "what do you do"?  They could have just been laid off, or my favorite: people ask me if I have kids, and since we've been trying for awhile and not yet succeeded, it is a painful question to be asked.  Anyway, so I try to avoid asking questions and instead I make conversation based on sharing the present moment with the person.  The most classic is commenting on the weather, or if we're at a party, "hey, i like this music", or "the food's really good".  I find this usually creates a natural comfort level when i share about the present experience with the person because that is what is usually on peoples' mind that very moment. I used to have a lot of problems with this, and read something about grounding oneself, using our five senses to experience our surroundings.  Usually when we allow ourselves to just "BE" instead of feeling anxiety about what we will say, it comes more naturally to talk, because thoughts just pop in our head.  Like if i'm just "BEING" i may notice something around me and naturally say it to the person next to me, like, "that baby is so cute", or "look at that gorgeous sunset"... I find people usually respond to this natural way of expressing oneself.\n\nHope this helps. it's helped me, but takes practice. I'm sure you also know there are many books out there about socializing so you may want to check out your local library too.\n \nGood Luck.