text: I hurt myself today
  To see if I still feel
  I focus on the pain
  The only thing thats real
  The needle tears a hole
  The old familiar sting
  Try to kill it all away
  But I remember everything
  I remember I was 10, I had my first encounters with depression
  My notebook chalked with suicidal thoughts in lyrics pressed in
  Ink on paper illustrations of a smith and Wesson
  Review the past and repetition lead me to the present
  Granted I’m feeling like many prefer the gift of absence
  Do want a wake, I want cremation, I don’t need a casket
  Fake family and friends around to claim they know me
  Really, if they did, I wouldn’t be as stressed or feel so lonely
  I only blame a few, I ain’t been reachin out
  But then again, reactions, the reasons words fails to leave my mouth
  Advil PM as a substitute for xans
  Don’t make me angry, make me sleepy, plus sobriety’s the plan, to kick off 2018, with no mollies in my hand, not even swisher sweets, I’m feeling weaker as I cram
  Information, in my cranium, I keep on pacing, and hit me since I dropped the “Dr.” peeps proceed to test my patience
  Can you hear me now?
  Don’t wanna scream or shout
  Okay, never mind, it’s cool, it’s fine, I’ll be okay
  Broken past will make you live your present life with no concerns about the future
  Or even if you want one, when the stress is getting to ya
  Recap all your qualities, the bad starts to abuse ya
  The good becomes irrelevant and messes with your mood
  And you telling yourself you’re worthless, your cursed and inadvertently introverted in person and no one knows that you’re hurting or cares to try to acknowledge the constant sorrows from all those times that you sprinted from hell and back and not wanting to wake tomorrow
  But its propane for the slow pain
  Tryna leave it all is cocaine when what you wanted was a novacane
  Mary Jane just don’t know your pain
  Try to roll it all when some say that you cannot just smoke it all away
  I’m a low life, low class grade, fallin, no one catch me, ditching all my classmates, don’t wanna face, another face, cause my anxiety attacks me, packing all my bags to run away cause I don’t need another in the ashtray
  Can you hear me now?
  Don’t wanna scream or shout
  Okay, never mind, it’s cool, it’s fine, I’ll be okay
  I’m a low life, low class grade, fallin, no one catch me, ditching all my classmates, don’t wanna face, another face, cause my anxiety attacks me, packing all my bags to run away cause I don’t need another in the ashtray 
  Can you hear me now?
  Don’t wanna scream or shout
  Okay, never mind, it’s cool, it’s fine, I’ll be okay
  I hurt myself today 
  Okay, never mind, its cool, its fine, Ill be okay