Third, there is the ought self. This is the self you believe you should be, the
kind of person who fulfills all the duties and obligations various sources
(parents, religion) have defined for you. Your ought self might be a devoted
parent, a patriotic citizen, or someone who gets involved in community
activities.
According to the theory, we often compare the way we act (our actual
self) with the way we want to be (ideal self) or the way we should be (ought
self). Not surprisingly, we often fall short in these comparisons.Discrepancies between our actual self and ideal self result in disappointment,
dejection, and sometimes sadness. This is the reaction of a would-be honors
student who becomes lax in his or her study habits and receives low grades.On the other hand, discrepancies between the actual self and the ought self
lead to agitation, anxiety, and guilt. These are the emotions we might expect
when we act selfishly or take advant age of someone, in contrast with the
generous and kind person we think we ought to be. As with other cognitive
processes, this comparison is said to take place outside of conscious aware-
ness. Thus you can experience sadness or guilt without being aware of whyyou feel that way.
Researchers find support for many of the predictions generated from
self-discrepancy theory. In particu lar, individuals made aware of a gap be-
tween their actual and ideal self often experience sadness, whereas those
with discrepant actual and ought selves suffer from anxiety (Cornette,
Strauman, Abramson, & Busch, 2008; Hardin & Lakin, 2009; Petrocelli &
Smith, 2005; Phillips & Silva, 2005; Renaud & McConnell, 2007).
Researchers also find that, like other p ersonality variables, measures of an
adult’s ideal-self and ought-self are fairly consistent over time (Strauman,
1996). Although little is known about how self-discrepancies affect
emotions in other cultures, one study found Japanese undergraduates had
larger discrepancies between their actual and ideal selves than did Canadianstudents (Heine & Lehman, 1999). Interestingly, this increase in self-
criticism by the Japanese students did not translate into higher levels of
depression.
APPLICATION: COGNITIVE ( BEHAVIOR) PSYCHOTHERAPY
The increased attention given to cognitive structures by personality research-
ers in recent years has been paralleled by the growing popularity of cognitive
approaches to psychotherapy. As described in Chapter 13, today many thera-pists combine cognitive approaches to therapy with procedures from traditional
behavioral therapies. But whether they call themselves cognitive therapists or
cognitive-behavior therapists, each identifies inappropriate thoughts as a causeof mood disorders and self-defeating behavior. People become anxious and
depressed because they harbor anxiety-provoking and depressing thoughts.
Consequently, the goal of most cognitive therapies is to help clients recognizeinappropriate thoughts and replace them with more appropriate ones. A cog-
nitive therapist ’s role usually falls somewhere between that of the intrusive
Freudian therapist and the Rogerian therapist who relies on the client for“The best scientist is
one who approaches
his subject [as] inti-
mately as a clinician…and the best clini-
cian is one who in-vites his client to joinhim in a controlled
investigation of life. ”
George Kelly424 CHAPTER 15 The Cognitive Approach