That is, I will be satisfied with my life to the extent that I feel good about my-
self and experience positive emotions, such as happiness. Indeed, studies findthis to be the case in individualistic cultures (Diener & Diener, 1995; Oishi &
Diener, 2001; Suh, Diener, Oishi, & Triandis, 1998). However, this path to life
satisfaction does not apply in collectivist cultures. Instead, how well people
meet the culturally defined standard of proper behavior predicts life satisfac-
tion in collectivist nations. Whereas feeling good is the key to a good life in
individualistic cultures, fitting into the role prescribed by society is the key incollectivist cultures.
In short, the theory and research on self-esteem presented in this chapter
is probably applicable only to people living in individualistic cultures.However, we should not take this to mean that people in collectivist cultures
do not have self-esteem. Rather, we should recognize that concepts like the
self and self-esteem have different meanings in different cultures. Personalityresearchers have come to appreciate these differences and are actively con-
ducting research on these questions.
SOLITUDE
In many ways Naomi is different from most people. Although she could easily
join her coworkers in the company cafeteria, Naomi often chooses to have
lunch alone. She ’ll eat a sandwich in the nearby park or sometimes spend the
lunch hour taking a solitary walk around the neighborhood. When friends
ask her to drop by on the weekend or to join them after work, she frequently
declines even when she has no other plans. Surprisingly, most people who
know her describe Naomi as a warm and engaging person. And Naomi verymuch enjoys her friends and coworkers. Still, compared to most people,
Naomi spends a significant amount of time by herself.
What might a personality psychologist say about Naomi? Research indi-
cates that our interpersonal relationships are among our most importantsources of happiness (Diener & Seligman, 2002; Myers, 1992). So why would
someone frequently turn down opportunities to socialize? Several possible ex-planations can be found in earlier sections of this book. Perhaps Naomi is in-
troverted (Chapter 10). She may not find the stimulation of social activity as
attractive as more extraverted people do. On the other hand, Naomi might
avoid people because she suffers from social anxiety (Chapter 8). Perhaps she
is afraid that others will evaluate her negatively, so she reduces her anxiety by
simply avoiding social interactions whenever possible. Then again, in some
ways Naomi ’s behavior is similar to what Karen Horney called the neurotic
style of “moving away from people ”(Chapter 5). According to this analysis,
Naomi may have adopted her avoidance style as a way to protect herselffrom anxiety when she was a child. Yet another possibility is that Naomi suf-
fers from loneliness. As described earlier in this chapter, she may lack some
basic social skills and spends time alone because she has difficulty interacting
with people and developing relationships.
Although each of these explanations can account for a person ’s desire to
spend time alone, there is at least one more interpretation, one that casts“A desire for mean-
ingful solitude is by
no means neurotic;
on the contrary, an
incapacity for con-structive solitude
is itself a sign of
neurosis. ”
Karen HorneySolitude 333