female rated that person better adjusted when she was disclosing. However,
when they thought the discloser was a male, the disclosure was seen as a signof poor psychological adjustment.
Other studies suggest at least a few exceptions to this rule. The freedom
women feel to disclose may be limited by the nature of what they are talkingabout. Highly disclosing women in one study were liked more when they
talked about their parents or about their sexual attitudes. However, women
who disclosed about their personal aggressiveness were liked less (Kleinke &Kahn, 1980). Similarly, self-disclosing men are seen as well adjusted as long as
they talk about masculine topics (Cunningham, Strassberg, & Haan, 1986). In
other words, men and women are more likely to be accepted when they dis-close within the appropriate societal roles for their gender. For men this usually
means withholding information; for women it means being open and disclos-
ing, but only on topics society deems appropriate. The result is an unfortunatelimitation on personal expression. American men have learned to be friendly
but to avoid intimacy. American women feel freer expressing themselves with
their friends, but within limits. Perhaps as traditional gender roles continue toerode, both men and women will feel free to interact with friends at whatever
level of intimacy they choose.
Disclosing Traumatic Experiences
Students participating in a psychology experiment some years ago were asked
to write anonymously about an upsetting or traumatic experience they once
had, something they may have kept inside for years and told to no one(Pennebaker & Beall, 1986). One of the interesting findings from this and
other studies like it is that nearly every participant is able to identify a secret
trauma (Pennebaker, 1989, 2000). People write about personal failures andhumiliations, illegal activities, drug and alcohol problems, and experiences
with sexual abuse. They often express guilt over regrettable actions or great
sadness about a personal loss. About a quarter of the participants cry. Thestudents in this study wrote about themselves for 15 minutes each night for
4 consecutive November nights. Other students assigned to a control condi-
tion were instructed to spend this same amount of time writing about rela-tively trivial topics (for example, a description of their living room).
What impact did this writing exercise have on the students? Measures of
blood pressure and self-reported mood indicated that writing about a trau-
matic experience led to more stress and a more negative mood immediately
after the disclosure. However, the investigators contacted the students again
in May, 6 months after they had written about their experiences. Students
were asked about their health during the 6 months and about how many
days they had been restricted because of an illness during this period. In addi-
tion, the number of visits each student had made to the campus health center
was recorded.
Some of the differences between the two groups are shown in Figure 12.2.
Students in the trivial topic group showed a significant increase in the numberof days they were restricted by illness and the number of visits they made to the
health center. But this was not the case for the students who had written aboutSelf-Disclosure 313