fei75766_ch11_345-376.indd 362  02/06/20 12:38 PM
Part III    Humanistic/Existential Theories362
Philip’s Destiny
When Philip, thearchitect immobilized byhisrelationship withNicole, firstsought 
Rollo Mayashistherapist, hewasparalyzed withinaction because hehadrefused 
toaccept hisdestiny. Hesawnoconnection between hisadult pattern ofrelating to
women andhischildhood strategy ofgetting along inanunpredictable and“crazy” 
world. Hisdestiny, however, wasnotfixed bythose early experiences. Philip, like
other people, hadthefreedom tochange hisdestiny, butfirsthehadtorecognize his
biological, social, andpsychological limitations; andthenhehadtopossess thecour-
agetomake choices within those limitations. 
Philip lacked boththeunderstanding andthecourage toconfront hisdestiny. 
Uptothepoint ofseeking therapy, hehadtriedtocompensate forhisdestiny, to
consciously deny it.“Hehadbeen searching forsomeone whowould make upforhis
having been bornintoanunwelcoming world consisting ofadisturbed mother and
aschizophrenic sister, adestiny thathedidnotintheslightest choose” (May, 1981, 
p.88).Philip’s denial ofhisdestiny lefthimresentful andconfused. Hisinability or
unwillingness tofacehisdestiny robbed himofpersonal freedom andkepthimtied
tohismother. 
Philip treated hiswives andNicole inthesame waythatearlier hadproven suc-
cessful withhismother andsister. Hecould notdareexpress hisanger towomen, but
instead, headopted acharming though somewhat possessive andprotective attitude 
toward them. May(1981) insisted that“thefreedom ofeachofusisinproportion to
thedegree withwhich weconfront andliveinrelation toourdestiny” (p.89).After 
several weeks ofpsychotherapy, Philip wasabletostopblaming hismother fornot
doing what hethought sheshould havedone. When hebegan toseethepositive 
things shedidforhim,hebegan tochange hisattitude toward her.Theobjective facts
ofhischildhood hadnotchanged, buthissubjective perceptions had.AsPhilip came 
toterms withhisdestiny, hebegan tobeabletoexpress hisanger, tofeellesstrapped 
inhisrelationship withNicole, andtobecome more aware ofhispossibilities. In
other words, hegained hisfreedom ofbeing.
The Power of Myth
Formany years, Maywasconcerned withthepowerful effects ofmyths onindividuals 
andcultures—a concern thatculminated inhisbook The Cry for Myth (1991). May
contended thatthepeople ofWestern civilization haveanurgent need formyths. 
Lacking myths tobelieve in,theyhaveturned toreligious cults, drugaddiction, and
popular culture inavaineffort tofindmeaning intheirlives. Myths arenotfalse-
hoods; rather, theyareconscious andunconscious belief systems thatprovide expla -
nations forpersonal andsocial problems. May(1991) compared myths tothesupport 
beams inahouse—not visible from theoutside, buttheyholdthehouse together and
make ithabitable.
From earliest times andindiverse civilizations, people have found meaning 
intheir livesbythemyths theyshare withothers intheir culture. Myths arethesto-
riesthatunify asociety; “they areessential totheprocess ofkeeping oursouls alive
andbringing usnewmeaning inadifficult andoften meaningless world” (May, 
1991, p.20).Final PDF to printer