C: But this is the way I ’ve always been. Every time I make a mistake, I die a thousand
deaths over it.
E: You blame yourself. But why? What ’s the horror? Is it going to make you better next
time? Is it going to make you make fewer mistakes?
C: No.
E: Then why blame yourself? Why are you a louse for making a mistake? Who said so?
C: I guess it ’s one of those feelings I have.
E: One of those beliefs. The belief is: “I am a louse! ”And then you get the feeling: “Oh,
how awful! How shameful! ”But the feeling follows the belief. And again, you ’re say-
ing,“I should be different; I shouldn’ t make mistakes! ”instead of, “Oh, look: I made
a mistake. It ’s undesirable to make mistakes. Now, how am I going to stop making
one next time? ”…
C: It might all go back to, as you said, the need for approval. If I don ’t make mistakes,
then people will look up to me. If I do it all perfectly —TABLE 15.2
Some Common Irrational Beliefs
Obvious Irrational Beliefs
Because I strongly desire to perform important tasks competently and successfully, I
absolutely must perform them well at all times.
Because I strongly desire to be approved by people I find significant, I absolutely
must always have their approval.
Because I strongly desire people to treat me considerately and fairly, they absolutely
must at all times and under all conditions do so.
Because I strongly desire to have a safe, comfortable, and satisfying life, the condi-
tions under which I live absolutely must at all times be easy, convenient, andgratifying.
Subtle and Tricky Irrational Beliefs
Because I strongly desire to perform important tasks competently and successfully,
and because I want to succeed at them only some of the time, I absolutely mustperform these tasks well.
Because I strongly desire to be approved by people I find significant, and because I
only want a little approval from them, I absolutely must have it.
Because I strongly desire people to treat me considerately and fairly, and because I
am almost always considerate and fair to others, they absolutely must treat me well.
Because I strongly desire to have a safe, comfortable, and satisfying life, and be-
cause I am a nice person who tries to help others lead this kind of life, the condi-tions under which I live absolutely must be easy, convenient, and gratifying.
Source: From “The impossibility of achieving consistently good mental health, ”by A. Ellis, American
Psychologist , 1987, 42, 364 –375. Reprinted by permission of the American Psychological Association.Application: Cognitive (Behavior) Psychotherapy 427