for one moment he knew everything-that aaron was dead , that mona might soon come to harm , that almost all that he had ever loved or cherished had been taken from him , almost all , that only a scant hope of happiness or satisfaction or joy remained to him , and that he was too weak and tired and hurt to think anymore , that he had to lie in the bed in the next room , which he had not even dared to glance at , the first bed he had seen in all this time since the bullet hit him and nearly killed him .