any other man in his place would be content and wish no further betterment but veig treth , unlike most men , was plagued by ambition as one is by an incurable ailment : the mere thought of waiting for the childless widow to croak and then spending the rest of his days merely enjoying the benefits of her bequest made him physically ill , robbed him of sleep and left him yearning for the life he truly desired : being not merely one of the spirit homes servants but high servant of the castle and of all feerien .