apparently soon after we had left , jeremy had had the sense to cancel the function , blaming it on the rain , as reports came flooding in to him from all departments involved in the banquet ( except the car park the phone was flooded ) that everything was going tits up , the caterers didnt have enough food , the wine was off , the ice had melted , the silver service was plastic , the orchestra was a part time mariachi band ( and all three of them were blind drunk ) , the non-non-slip floor was not only causing chaos but also broken bones , and guests were wandering around the secure areas unabated .