nevertheless , while acknowledging the truth of what she said , i thought proper to insist ; but without even giving herself the trouble to enter into any discussion with me , she took one of her pistols , laid it on her table , day and night , and said that at the first word that should be spoken to her about removing , either within the house or out of it , she would blow out the brains of the person who should be so imprudent as to meddle with a matter which only concerned herself .