she hated to admit it , but as magnus and dimitri took turns light-heartedly teasing her and each other , as julia jumped flightily from asking her questions about school to asking ella about cooking , as jaeden threw her affectionate smirks , as christian and lucia whispered lovingly to one another , and as lucien ate his meal while playing with jaela and making her giggle throughout the entire dinner , she realized that this was what she had been missing her entire life .