my mom and his moms have me over and over again that sexual preference is not a choice , but when ely 's leaning and teasing , so close to me without touching me , yet i still feel him-up here , down there , on every centimeter of my skin-it 's like i ca n't , because no matter what anyone says , i ca n't help but believe that he chose for me : when we were thirteen and learning how to kiss by using each other as practice , g*y was n't even an issue .