it 's like a tree that 's been used for a gallows to strangle the life out of some poor sod , or a lonely grave where some demented lover has slain his poor lovin ' sweetheart and buried her poor remains ... or a slaver that has been the witness of countless deaths , horrible agonies , unspeakable cruelties , cruelties one can scarcely speak without such revulsion that ... no , i could never love this ship , as it has become a vile thing , a thing that i think even hates itself .