i try to shout , i try to move , but i ca n't , and it 's just like when i was frozen , and i 'm trapped again , and i ca n't move , i ca n't , i ca n't , and i have to breathe , i have to breathe , but there 's no air , just water , and i am screaming inside my head to not breathe but the only things that work are my involuntary functions like my heart that 's beating too fast and my lungs that have to breathe .