there were some of our men who had never seen me in action before , and you 'll forgive me for admitting there was an element of showmanship in my combat as i span from man to man , cutting down guards with one hand , blasting with the other , felling two , sometimes three , at a time ; driven , not by ferocity or blood-lust-i was no animal , there was little savagery or cruelty to what i did-but by skill , grace and dexterity .