that feel , yes , that pleasure , most definitely , but then why , did i find myself , behind the desk , a pencil in my hand , wondering how it was , that these words , that i so magically create , keep me preoccupied , teach me about myself , and keep me from going crazy , those plot lines , that seem to spin themselves , why do i continue to abandon them , and leave them alone , in the dark spin , of my imagination , is it not a shock , that my love for these words , runs so deep , i would like to think not , but then again , youre the one who makes the call , sometimes the people still ask , where has the devil gone , and when will i pick up the pencil again , when will i spin those tales , of the forgotten magic , that i 've become accustomed , and the answer , is now , today is the day i pick it up , release the dragon from his cage , and let the world , and the words fly , gingerbread house the hallways to her heart are closed , cut off years ago , when she realized that no one was there to help her , she was alone , helpless , and sad , but no one came along , she wanted that journey , one final journey , one that would lead her to a promised land , and take her away from this world , that she 's come to hate , so she sets foot on the ground , her eyes unclear of where she 's headed , and she begins to walk , almost stumbling , hours come and go , and she grows tired , she comes upon a house , set back in the woods , the front was run down , the paint worn away , and the door hung from its hinges , she climbed the stairs , and noticed the dirty rocker , she sits down , and stares out into the road , from which she 'd just come , she feels at home , and does n't even know why , , she leaned back , and takes a nap , to recharge her batteries , the sunsets on the house , and she comes to , feeling more rested then she 's felt in years , the horrible memories she 'd had , from the past , are still there , but grows distant , she turns and realizes that this journey that she seeks , this escape she needs , is inside this house , she walks up to the door , and pushes it aside , the inside , is more beautiful than she ever imagined , she takes one step back , and notices that now the outside is just as beautiful , restored to its old luster , the paint is a brilliant white , the shutters are blue , and the door is the original wood , her eyes must be deceiving her she thinks , but she walks back through the door and notices in the front room , the beautiful chandelier is lit up to perfection , she looks around and notices on the table is a bottle of wine , why not it ca n't hurt , so she takes a glass and pours some , she wants to take a look around at the house , she notices the kitchen , a brilliant tile floor with stunning brown cabinets , she ca n't believe that this house is so beautiful , the real question though , is how did she find it , she takes a seat on the couch , it 's softer than it looks , and stretches out , she feels her body relaxing , her eyes close , but her mind does little to suppress the memories , every haunting vision comes back , and climbs into her head , she feels her body begin to convulse , and suddenly she hears voices , far away at first , but growing closer , and she realizes she 's moving , rolling it feels , on a bed , and she gently opens her eyes , to notice she 's under lights , she closes her eyes back , and lets herself wheel away , the lights around her are bright , and fields of flowers , she notices that there is a figure walking toward her , she ca n't make them out , then she hears a voice inside her head , this is n't where you need to be baby girl , you have so much left to do , so many things left to achieve , but in order to reach your ultimate goal , you need to wake up , memories , and life in general may be horrible , but you are so much better than anything , and anyone , no one can hold you down , only yourself , you are indeed an angel , but not here , not yet , you have much to do suddenly the vision goes black , she 's coming back she hears as the light re-enters her vision , she opens her eyes , and they 're crowded around her , one holding her hand , the doctor , has a worried look on his face , we almost lost you sweetheart .