back to top 13 the faerie child as the lovers journeyed together back to avalon , accompanied by chiseller , rosa began to suffer the pangs of withdrawal from the apples of forgetfulness , and from all the teachings of false comfort in the void , and she was sick and shivered even in the heat of the sun so that calibur feared for her life , and by night she was assailed by demons that only she could see , and her womb cramped until she begged for the phagzagira to come and take it from her , and then fumbled to find a knife or any sharp thing , and finding none , broke down and wept for the child she had never had .