got to keep it together , got to get out of the bathroom and get back before they noticed , as if they hadnt already smelled the stink from his body , saw his bloodshot , glossy eyes , and wavering gait , saw him rotting like the body in the casket the voice of his dad whispered to him , inaudible between the rushing sounds of his brain ; the blood made noise , squishy in his ear , flowing to his head to keep his brain alive .