then , behind me , the sound of padding footsteps and i turn and see it , and i stumble backwards , falling to the ground , retching , vomit forcing its way up my throat and i 'm so fucking scared because the thing snarls , and looks like it 's smiling and i am choking , coughing , crying , and the only escape route i have is into that room , so even though i 'm terrified of turning my back on the thing , i crawl away and through the door and inside the albatross .