i push away the things that have fallen on her , all the files and screenpads , everything broken as we tumbled , everything that was n't fastened down broken to pieces- i pull up a large metal plate off her back- and i see it- the pilot 's chair was torn from the floor , tearing away the back panel of it , turning the backrest into a shard of metal- a shard that 's gone right into my mother 's spine- 'mum ? '