my lungs feel filled with water , like i 'm carrying a pile of river stones in my chest , but i put the shirt on , i gather what useable things i can still get from my rucksack , some clothes , my own medipak , what ai n't been ruined by mr prentiss jr or the rain and i take them and my ma 's book over to viola 's bag and put them inside cuz there 's no way i can carry a rucksack on my back no more .