[ todd ] it 's a sound but it 's not a sound and it 's louder than anything possible and it would burst yer eardrums if you were hearing it with yer ears rather than the inside of yer head and everything goes white and it 's not just like i 'm blind but deaf and dumb and frozen , too , and the pain of it comes from right deep down within so there 's no part of yerself you can grab to protect it , just a stinging , burning slap right into the middle of who you are .