as i held her little hand , steadying the stick so that the marshmallow she was holding over the fire was close enough that it would toast quickly ( because millie was so excited to eat her smores that she was becoming impatient ) but far enough away that it wouldnt burn ( which would make us have to start the process all over again ) , i could not look at her , because for a secondfor just one , strange secondi had convinced myself that we were back home in shadow village , and it was penny sitting beside me .