i had awoken , trying to remember through the fear in my heart what the words had said , and i could only remember the first part : the one you have loved the longest but i did not know what would happen to that person , and i did not want to speculate as to who it was i had loved the longest , though i assumed , in terms of prophecies from beyond the known realm , they would be referring to the two men in my life , so if it was the man i had loved the longest james .