his eyes were widened , and his breaths were quickened ; too much could happen , there were so many different ways tragedy could strikethey could have accidentally left a spot unfilled in their ash barrier ; one or all of them could have been startled by the trebestia and fallen over into their waiting , lethal arms ; they could have reached the bunker to find that the old spirits had already found it ; the old spirits could have chased them into the woods and dragged them back ; i could have been taken from the house before he could return to me beyond james , and beyond that moment when i saw him leading them to the tree-line , i felt pennys longing for james and me , and i lost my ability to breathe .