adam had been by my side while i was counting down the seconds to my death , to the moment when my place in this world of shadows and darkness but also great love and joy would be stolen from me , when a bullet would erase me from an existence that had once been promised to be endless , immortal , irrevocable adam had kissed my lips and whispered to me that i was so brave , that he was so proud to be by my side , that he wished to be with no one else ... adam had helped me fight them off ; adam had kept me warm through the nights and listened to my deepest thoughts , to my most painful memories that i had shared so tentatively , so reluctantly ... but that i had shared .