i had wanted so desperately to turn away from their temptation , to ignore the cruel torture that was their offer , but just like he had promised , i was unable to say no , even if it meant forever alienating the man to whom i had grown so close adam would be furious that i had given in to them when the price was so high ; he and his wife could be killed if i did not play paul and tyres game with a strategy that was wilier than their own .