[header] How to convince someone not to return to an abusive ex [title] Share your concerns gently. [step] You may be tempted to speak out defiantly against your friend returning to the abusive partner. But, intense emotional displays won't help the situation. 
Approach your friend calmly and let them know your concerns. [substeps] You might say, " lori, i know zach is begging you to come back.