Sir Hugh , persuade me not ; I will make a Star-chamber matter of it : if he were twenty Sir John Falstaffs , he shall not abuse Robert Shallow , esquire . Ay , cousin Slender , and ‘ Custalorum .’ Ay , that I do ; and have done any time these 10 three hundred years . It is an old coat . The luce is the fresh fish ; the salt fish is an old coat . 20 You may , by marrying . Not a whit . The council shall hear it ; it is a riot . Ha ! o ’ my life , if I were young again , the sword should end it . Well , let us see honest Master Page . Is Falstaff there ? Master Page , I am glad to see you : much good do it your good heart ! I wished your venison better ; it was ill killed . How doth good Mistress Page ?— and I thank you always with my heart , la ! with my heart . 75 Sir , I thank you ; by yea and no , I do . That he will not . ’ Tis your fault , ’ tis your fault ; ’ tis a good dog . Sir , he ’ s a good dog , and a fair dog : can there be more said ? he is good and fair . Is Sir John Falstaff here ? He hath wronged me , Master Page . If it be confessed , it is not redressed : is not that so , Master Page ? He hath wronged me ; indeed he hath ; at a word , he hath , believe me : Robert Shallow , esquire , 95 saith , he is wronged . Knight , you have beaten my men , killed my 100 deer , and broke open my lodge . Tut , a pin ! this shall be answered . The council shall know this . Come , coz ; come , coz ; we stay for you . A word with you , coz ; marry , this , coz : there is , as ’ twere , a tender , a kind of tender , made afar off by Sir Hugh here . Do you understand me ? 190 Nay , but understand me . Ay , there ’ s the point , sir . Cousin Abraham Slender , can you love her ? That you must . Will you , upon good dowry , marry her ? Nay , conceive me , conceive me , sweet coz : what I do is to pleasure you , coz . Can you love the maid ? Ay , I think my cousin meant well . Here comes fair Mistress Anne . 235 Re-enter ANNE PAGE . Would I were young for your sake , Mistress Anne ! I will wait on him , fair Mistress Anne . I follow , mine host , I follow . Good even and twenty , good Master Page ! Master Page , will you go with us ? we have sport in hand . Sir , there is a fray to be fought between Sir Hugh the Welsh priest and Caius the French doctor . Will you go with us to behold it ? My 185 merry host hath had the measuring of their weapons ; and , I think , hath appointed them contrary places ; for , believe me , I hear the parson is no jester . Hark , I will tell you what our sport shall be . Have with you , mine host . Tut , sir , I could have told you more . In these times you stand on distance , your passes , stoccadoes , and I know not what : ’ tis the heart , Master Page ; ’ tis here , ’ tis here . I have seen the time , with my long sword I would have made you four tall fellows skip like rats . 205 Save you , Master Doctor Caius ! He is the wiser man , master doctor : he is a curer of souls , and you a curer of bodies ; if you should 35 fight , you go against the hair of your professions . Is it not true , Master Page ? Bodykins , Master Page , though I now be old , 40 and of the peace , if I see a sword out , my finger itches to make one . Though we are justices , and doctors , and churchmen , Master Page , we have some salt of our youth in us ; we are the sons of women , Master Page . It will be found so , Master Page . Master Doctor Caius , I am come to fetch you home . I am sworn of the peace : you have shewed yourself a wise physician , and Sir Hugh hath shewn himself a wise and patient churchman . You must go with me , master doctor . 50 We will do it . Page , Shal ., and Slen . Adieu , good master doctor . How now , master parson ! Good morrow , good Sir Hugh . Keep a gamester from the dice , and a good 35 student from his book , and it is wonderful . What , the sword and the word ! do you study 40 them both , master parson ? I have lived fourscore years and upward ; I never heard a man of his place , gravity , and learning , so wide of his own respect . It appears so , by his weapons . Keep them asunder : here comes Doctor Caius . So do you , good master doctor . Trust me , a mad host . Follow , gentlemen , follow . , Page , & c. Well met , Master Ford . I must excuse myself , Master Ford . 45 We have lingered about a match between Anne Page and my cousin Slender , and this day we shall have 50 our answer . Well , fare you well : we shall have the freer wooing at Master Page ’ s . Break their talk , Mistress Quickly : my kinsman shall speak for himself . Be not dismayed . She ’ s coming ; to her , coz . O boy , thou hadst a father ! Mistress Anne , my cousin loves you . He will maintain you like a gentlewoman . 45 He will make you a hundred and fifty pounds jointure . Marry , I thank you for it ; I thank you for that good comfort . She calls you , coz : I ’ ll leave you . Indeed , Master Ford , this is not well , indeed . By my fidelity , this is not well , Master Ford ; this wrongs you . That ’ s good too : but what needs either your ‘ mum ’ or her ‘ budget ?’ the white will decipher her well enough . It hath struck ten o ’ clock . 10 Nere talke to me , Ile make a star-chamber matter of it . The Councell shall know it . Tho he be a knight , he shall not thinke to carrie it so away . M. Page I will not be wronged . For you Syr , I loue you , and for my cousen , He comes to looke vpon your daughter . 10 Sir Iohn , sir Iohn , you haue hurt my keeper , Kild my dogs , stolne my deere . Well this shall be answered . Well , the Councell shall know it . 30 At hand mine host , at hand . M. Ford . god den to you God den and twentie good M. Page . I tell you sir we haue sport in hand . 95 Harke you sir , Ile tell you what the sport shall be 100 Doctor Cayus and sir Hu are to fight , My merrie Host hath had the measuring Of their weapons , and hath Appointed them contrary places . Harke in your eare : I tell you what M. Page , I beleeue The Doctor is no Iester , heele laie it on : For tho we be Iustices and Doctors , And Church men , yet we are 115 The sonnes of women M. Page : Ha with you mine host . How do you M. Doctor ? We wil do it my host . Farewel M. Doctor . God saue you M. parson . Keep them asunder , take away their weapons . Let them keepe their limbs hole , and hack our English . Afore God a mad host , come let vs goe . wel , wel , God be with you , we shall haue the fairer Wooing at Maister { P } ages : Mary I thanke you for that : 35 To her cousin , to her . Fie cusse fie , thou art not right , O thou hadst a father . He will make you ioynter of three hundred pound a yeare , he shall make you a Gentlewoman . God saue you sir Iohn Falstaffe .