Carry those things in : go ! ( Ex . SERVANTS . Sosia , come here ; A word with you ! Quite another thing . This business Needs not that art ; but those good qualities , Which I have ever known abide in you , Fidelity and secrecy . Since I bought you , from a boy How just and mild a servitude you 've pass 'd With me , you 're conscious : from a purchas 'd slave I made you free , because you serv 'd me freely : The greatest recompense I could bestow . Nor do I repent . I will ; and this I must advise you first ; The nuptial you suppose preparing now , Is all unreal . You shall hear all from first to last : and thus The conduct of my son , my own intent , And what part you 're to act , you 'll know at once . For my son , Sosia , now to manhood grown , Had freer scope of living : for before How might you know , or how indeed divine His disposition , good or ill , while youth , Fear , and a master , all constrain 'd him ? Though most , as is the bent of youth , apply Their mind to some one object , horses , hounds , Or to the study of philosophy ; Yet none of these , beyond the rest , did he Pursue ; and yet , in moderation , all . I was o'erjoy ' d . So did he shape his life to bear himself With ease and frank good-humor unto all ; Mix 'd in what company soe'er , to them He wholly did resign himself ; and join 'd In their pursuits , opposing nobody , Nor e'er assuming to himself : and thus With ease , and free from envy , may you gain Praise , and conciliate friends . Meanwhile , ‘ tis now about three years ago , A certain woman from the isle of Andros , Came o'er to settle in this neighborhood , By poverty and cruel kindred driv'n : Handsome and young . At first Modest and thriftily , though poor , she liv 'd , With her own hands a homely livelihood Scarce earning from the distaff and the loom . But when a lover came , with promis 'd gold , Another , and another , as the mind Falls easily from labor to delight , She took their offers , and set up the trade . They , who were then her chief gallants , by chance Drew thither , as oft happen with young men My son to join their company . “ So , so ! ” Said I within myself , “ he 's smit ! he has it ! ” And in the morning as I saw their servants Run to and fro , I 'd often call , “ here , boy ! Prithee now , who had Chrysis yesterday ? ” The name of this same Andrian . Phædrus they said , Clinia , or Niceratus , For all these three then follow 'd her .— “ Well , well , But what of Pamphilus ? ” — “ Of Pamphilus ! He supp 'd , and paid his reck'ning . ” — I was glad . Another day I made the like inquiry , But still found nothing touching Pamphilus . Thus I believ 'd his virtue prov 'd , and hence Thought him a miracle of continence : For he who struggles with such spirits , yet Holds in that commerce an unshaken mind , May well be trusted with the governance Of his own conduct . Nor was I alone Delighted with his life , but all the world With one accord said all good things , and prais 'd My happy fortunes , who possess 'd a son So good , so lib'rally disposed .— In short Chremes , seduc 'd by this fine character , Came of his own accord , to offer me His only daughter with a handsome portion In marriage with my son . I lik 'd the match ; Betroth 'd my son ; and this was pitch 'd upon , By joint agreement , for the wedding-day . I 'll tell you . In a few days , the treaty still on foot , This neighbor Chrysis dies . My son , on this event , was often there With those who were the late gallants of Chrysis ; Assisted to prepare the funeral , Ever condol 'd , and sometimes wept with them . This pleas 'd me then ; for in myself I thought , “ Since merely for a small acquaintance-sake He takes this woman 's death so nearly , what If he himself had lov 'd ? What would he feel For me , his father ? ” All these things , I thought ; Were but the tokens and the offices Of a humane and tender disposition . In short , on his account , e'en I myself Attend the funeral , suspecting yet No harm . You shall hear all . The Corpse Borne forth , we follow : when among the women Attending there , I chanc 'd to cast my eyes , Upon one girl , in form —— And look ; so modest , and so beauteous , Sosia ! That nothing could exceed it . As she seem 'd To grieve beyond the rest ; and as her air Appear 'd more liberal and ingenuous , I went and ask 'd her women who she was . Sister , they said , to Chrysis : when at once It struck my mind ; “ So ! so ! the secret 's out ; Hence were those tears , and hence all that compassion ! ” Meanwhile the funeral proceeds : we follow ; Come to the sepulchre : the body 's plac 'd Upon the pile , lamented : whereupon This sister I was speaking of , all wild , Ran to the flames with peril of her life . Then ! there ! the frighted Pamphilus betrays His well-dissembled and long-hidden love : Runs up , and takes her round the waist , and cries , “ Oh my Glycerium ! what is it you do ? Why , why endeavor to destroy yourself ? ” Then she , in such a manner , that you thence Might easily perceive their long , long , love , Threw herself back into his arms , and wept , Oh how familiarly ! Chremes next day came open-mouth 'd to me : Oh monstrous ! he had found that Pamphilus Was married to this stranger woman . I Deny the fact most steadily , and he As steadily insists . In short we part On such bad terms , as let me understand He would refuse his daughter . Not even this Appear 'd sufficient for reproof . “ Father , You have , you know , Prescrib 'd a term to all these things yourself . The time is near at hand , when I must live According to the humor of another . Meanwhile , permit me now to please my own ! ” If he Refuses , on account of this amour , To take a wife , such obstinate denial Must be considered as his first offense . Wherefore I now , from this mock-nuptial , Endeavor to draw real cause to chide : And that same rascal Davus , if he 's plotting , That he may let his counsel run to waste , Now , when his knaveries can do no harm : Who , I believe , with all his might and main Will strive to cross my purposes ; and that More to plague me , than to oblige my son . Why so ! Bad mind , bad heart : But if I catch him at his tricks !— But what need words ? — If , as I wish it may , it should appear That Pamphilus objects not to the match , Chremes remains to be prevail 'd upon , And will , I hope , consent . ‘ Tis now your place To counterfeit these nuptials cunningly ; To frighten Davus ; and observe my son , What he 's about , what plots they hatch together . Go first : I 'll follow you . ( Exit SOSIA . Beyond all doubt My son 's averse to take a wife : I saw How frighten 'd Davus was , but even now , When he was told a nuptial was preparing . But here he comes .In this Scene , all quotation marks were supplied from the 1768 edition . Carry those things in : go !can be taken as the correct plural form “ Exeunt ” . Harper He wholly did resign himself ; and join 'd In their pursuits , opposing nobody , Colman 1768 He wholly did resign himself ; complied With all their humours , checking nobody , But now he will ; to your cost too , I warrant you ! What says the rogue ? Davus ! Here ! this way ! What say you ? Upon what ! The world reports that my son keeps a mistress . D'ye mind what I say ? Sirrah ! But for me now to dive into these matters May seem perhaps like too severe a father : For all his youthful pranks concern not me . While ‘ twas in season , he had my free leave To take his swing of pleasure . But to-day Brings on another stage of life , and asks For other manners : wherefore I desire , Or , if you please , I do beseech you , Davus , To set him right again . All , who are fond of mistresses , dislike The thoughts of matrimony . And then , if such a person entertains An evil counselor in those affairs , He tampers with the mind , and makes bad worse . No ? Then for the rest I have to say to you , You choose I should speak plainly . If I discover then , that in this match You get to your dog 's tricks to break it off , Or try to show how shrewd a rogue you are , I 'll have you beat to mummy , and then thrown In prison , Sirrah ! upon this condition , That when I take you out again , I swear To grind there in your stead . D'ye take me now ? Or do n't you understand this neither ? I could excuse your tricks in any thing , Rather than this . You laugh at me : well , well !— I give you warning That you do nothing rashly , nor pretend You was not advertis 'd of this — take heed ! ( Exit .Harper To have o'erwhelm ' d us , nor have giv'n us time Colman 1768 To have o'erwhelm ' d us , nor allow 'd us time Or , if you please , I do beseech you , Davus , anomalously printed as DAVUS in Harper text ] I return to see What they 're about , or what they meditate . I see them both together . Here , Pamphilus ! It is my pleasure , that to-day , As I have told you once before , you marry . You perform Your duty , when you cheerfully comply With my desires . Now then go in That when you 're wanted you be found . Well , what now , Davus ? Nothing , say you ? And yet I look 'd for something . Can you speak truth ? Say then , Is not this wedding irksome to my son , From his adventure with the Andrian ? I praise him for't . Yet , in my eyes , he seem 'd a little sad . For what ? Well , what is't ? Tell me , what is't ? Hold your peace . I 'll look to that . Away ! ( Exit DAVUS . What now ? What means the varlet ? Precious rogue , For if there 's any knavery on foot , He , I am sure , is the contriver o n't . ( Exit . Harper ‘ Tis true he lov 'd ; and even then by stealth Colman 1768 ‘ Tis true he lov 'd ; but even then by stealth ] ACT THE THIRD . The Andrian 's maid-servant ! Is't not ? What says she ? How 's that ? O Jupiter ! what 's this I hear ? If this be true , I 'm lost indeed . How 's this ? And can he be so mad ? What ! educate A harlot 's child !— Ah , now I know their drift : Fool that I was , scarce smelt it out at last . DAVUS What 's this he says he has smelt out ? Imprimis , ‘ Tis this rogue 's trick upon me . All a sham : A counterfeit deliv'ry , and mock labor , Devis 'd to frighten Chremes from the match . Heyday ! Already ! Oh ridiculous ! Soon as she heard that I was at the door She hastens to cry out : your incidents Are ill-tim 'd , Davus . Are your players Unmindful of their cues , and want a prompter ? This too where 's he that knows you would not swear Was your contrivance ? While in the house , forsooth , the midwife gave No orders for the Lady in the straw : But having issued forth into the street , Bawls out most lustily to those within . — Oh Davus , am I then so much your scorn ? Seem I so proper to be play 'd upon , With such a shallow , barefac 'd , imposition ? You might at least , in reverence , have us 'd Some spice of art , wer't only to pretend You fear 'd my anger , should I find you out . Did not I give you warning ? threaten too , In case you play 'd me false ? But all in vain : For what car 'd you ?— What ! think you I believe This story of a child by Pamphilus ? Why do n't you answer ? I been inform 'd ? D'ye laugh at me ? Whence ! from you : Because I know you . Beyond all doubt ; I know it : I not know you ? Falsely , hey ? All that I know is this ; that nobody Has been deliver 'd here . But how d'ye know ? How 's this ? Having discover 'd such a plot on foot , Why did you not directly tell my son ? Get you in . Wait for me there , and see that you prepare What 's requisite . ( Exit DAVUS . He has not wrought upon me To yield implicit credit to his tale , Nor do I know if all he said be true . But , true or false , it matters not : to me My Son 's own promise is the main concern . Now to meet Chremes , and to beg his daughter In marriage with my son . If I succeed , What can I rather wish , than to behold Their marriage-rites to-day ? For since my son Has given me his word , I 've not a doubt , Should he refuse , but I may force him to it : And to my wishes see where Chremes comes .The initial direction “ Manent SIMO , DAVUS . ” is supplied from the 1768 edition . Harper SIMO . I been inform 'd ? DAVUS . What then you found it out ? Colman 1768 SIMO . Inform 'd ? DAVUS . What then you found it out yourself ? Harper DAVUS . I 've heard so , and believe so . Besides a thousand things concur to lead To this conjecture . In the first place , she Profess 'd herself with child by Pamphilus : That proves a falsehood . Now that she perceives A nuptial preparation at our house , A maid 's dispatch 'd immediately to bring Colman 1768 DAVUS . I 've heard so , and believe so . Besides a thousand different things concur To lead to this conjecture . First , Glycerium Profess 'd herself with child by Pamphilus : That proves a falsehood . Now as she perceives A nuptial preparation at our house , A maid 's immediately dispatch 'd to bring ] Chremes , good-day ! And I for you . A moment 's hearing ; you shall be inform 'd , What I request , and what you wish to know . Now by the Gods ; Now by our friendship , Chremes , which begun In infancy , has still increas 'd with age ; Now by your only daughter , and my son , Whose preservation wholly rests on you ; Let me entreat this boon : and let the match Which should have been , still be . E'en in that spirit , I desire it , Chremes , Entreat it may be done ; nor would entreat , But that occasion urges . A diff'rence ‘ twixt Glycerium and my son . A breach so wide as gives me hopes To sep'rate them forever . Indeed ‘ tis thus . Prevent we then , I pray , this mischief now ; While time permits , while yet his passion 's sore From contumelies ; ere these women 's wiles , Their wicked arts , and tears made up of fraud Shake his weak mind , and melt it to compassion . Give him a wife : by intercourse with her , Knit by the bonds of wedlock , soon I hope , He 'll rise above the guilt that sinks him now . How can you know , unless you make the trial ? The mischief , should he fail , Is only this : divorce , which Heav'n forbid ! But mark what benefits if he amend ! First , to your friend you will restore a son ; Gain to yourself a son-in-law , and match Your daughter to an honest husband . I see I ever lov 'd you justly , Chremes . But what ? Davus , Davus , in all their secrets , told me so ; Advis 'd me too , to hasten on the match As fast as possible . Would he , d'ye think , Do that , unless he were full well assur 'd My son desir 'd it too ?— Hear , what he says . Ho there ! call Davus forth .— But here he comes . Harper CHREMES . Whence is't you know Colman 1768 CHREMES . From whence are you appriz 'd ] What 's the matter ? D'ye hear him ?— Davus , I for some time past Was fearful of you ; lest , like other slaves , As slaves go now , you should put tricks upon me , And baffle me , to favor my son 's love . I thought so : and in fear of that Conceal 'd a secret which I 'll now disclose . I 'll tell you : for I now Almost begin to think you may be trusted . No marriage was intended . None . All counterfeit , to sound my son and you . Even so . Hear me . No sooner had I sent you in . But opportunely I encountered Chremes . I told him all . That you had just told me ,—— Begged him to grant his daughter , and at length With much ado prevail 'd . How 's that ? My good friend Chremes then Is now no obstacle . Prithee , now , Davus , seeing you alone Have brought about this match —— Endeavor farther to amend my son . It were easy now , While his mind 's irritated . Do then : where is he ? I 'll in , and tell him , what I 've now told you . ( Exit . SCENE VII . DAVUS alone . Lost and undone ! To prison with me straight ! No prayer , no plea : for I have ruin 'd all ! Deceiv 'd the old man , hamper 'd Pamphilus With marriage ; marriage , brought about to-day By my sole means ; beyond the hopes of one ; Against the other 's will .—— Oh , cunning fool ! Had I been quiet , all had yet been well . But see , he 's coming . Would my neck were broken ! Ah , Chremes , I must now entreat the more , More urge you to confirm the promis 'd boon . What injuries ? Now , for Heav'n ' s sake . Believe not them , whose interest it is To make him vile and abject as themselves . These stories are all feign 'd , concerted all , To break the match : when the occasion 's past That urges them to this , they will desist . Artifice ! mere trick . It may be so : and Davus Told me beforehand they 'd attempt all this ; Though I , I know not how , forgot to tell you . Ha ! whence comes the rogue ? What mischief 's this ? A knave ! Who 's that he praises ? Why do n't I speak to him ? Good Sir , your humble Servant ! You 've taken special care . Oh , mighty fine ! That to be sure is all that 's wanting now . — But tell me , Sir ! what business had you there ? You ? You , Sir . As if I ask 'd , how long it was ago . Is Pamphilus within ? — Oh torture .— Did not you assure me , Sirrah , They were at variance ? Why then Is Pamphilus within ? What story now ? And what says he , then ? Ho , Dromo ! Dromo ! Dromo ! Speak but a word more — Dromo ! Here , drag him headlong in , And truss the rascal up immediately . Davus . Because I 'll have it so . Take him , I say . Off with him ! I will not hear . I 'll trounce you . True or false . See that you keep him bound : and do you hear ? Bind the slave hand and foot . Away ! ( Exeunt DROMO and DAVUS . Oh Chremes , Chremes , Filial unkindness !— Do n't you pity me ! To feel all this for such a thankless son !—— Here , Pamphilus , come forth ! ho , Pamphilus ! Have you no shame ? What say you ? Most —— As if ‘ twere possible to utter aught Severer than he merits !— Tell me then ; Glycerium is a citizen ? They say so !— Oh amazing impudence !—— Does he consider what he says ? does he Repent the deed ? or does his color take The hue of shame ?— To be so weak of soul , Against the custom of our citizens , Against the law , against his father 's will , To wed himself to shame and this vile woman . Ah , Pamphilus ! d'ye feel Your wretchedness at last ? Then , then , when first You wrought upon your mind at any rate To gratify your passion : from that hour Well might you feel your state of wretchedness . — But why give in to this ? Why torture thus , Why vex my spirit ? Why afflict my age For his distemp'rature ? Why rue his sins ? — No ; let him have her , joy in her , live with her . How , my father !— can I think You want this father ? You that for yourself A home , a wife , and children have acquir 'd Against your father 's will ? And witnesses Suborn 'd , to prove that she 's a citizen ? — You 've gain 'd your point . What would you say ? Hear him ? What must I hear then , Chremes ! Well , let him speak : I hear him . Bring him here ! Well , be it so . ( Exit PAMPHILUS . I could bear all this bravely , Chremes ; more , Much more , to know that he deceiv 'd me not . Asks he for me ? So , Sir , you say that this Glycerium Is an Athenian citizen ? What then are you come prepar 'd ? And dare you ask for what ? Shall you go on thus with impunity ? Lay snares for inexperienc 'd , lib'ral youth , With fraud , temptation , and fair promises Soothing their minds ?—— — And then With marriage solder up their harlot loves ? A good man he ?— To come , Although at Athens never seen till now , So opportunely on the wedding-day !—— Is such a fellow to be trusted , Chremes ? A Sharper ! All romance . How ! But why believe you this ? True . I knew him . Indeed , my Chremes , I heartily rejoice she 's found your daughter . Chremes , I trust you will believe , we all Rejoice at this . Peace , son ! the event Has reconcil 'd me . Be it so . Why do you not give orders instantly To bring her to our house ? It can n't be . He has other business of his own , Of nearer import to himself . He 's bound . How , Sir ?— neck and heels . It shall be done . I 'll in , and order it . ( Exit .