“ Who , indeed ? when the founder of the feast leaveth an invited guest so empty ! Yea , sir , the guest was invited , and the board was spread . The fruits that lay upon it be there still , and fresh as ever ; and the bread of life in those capacious canisters is unconsumed and unbroken , ” “ Would it were so ! ” “ Do I live to hear Charlecote Hall called a brothel-pulpit ? Alas , then , I have lived too long ! ” “ By daylight and before the parson . Bears and boars are tame creatures , and discreet , in the sunshine and after dinner . ” “ The man and his wife are one , saith holy Scripture . ” “ I warrant him , both lent and stolen . ” “ See , your worship ! what discordances ! They cannot agree in their own story . ” “ By less differences than this estates have been lost , hearts broken , and England , our country , filled with homeless , helpless , destitute orphans . I protest against it . ” “ No hints , no conspiracies ! Keep to your own story , man , and do not borrow his . ” “ So learned a magistrate as your worship will surely do me justice by hearing me attentively . I am young ; nevertheless , having more than one year written in the office of an attorney , and having heard and listened to many discourses and questions on law , I cannot but remember the heavy fine inflicted on a gentleman of this county who committed a poor man to prison for being in possession of a hare , it being proved that the hare was in his possession , and not he in the hare 's . ” “ It would be Jesuitical , Sir Silas , if it dragged the law by its perversions to the side of oppression and cruelty . The order of Jesuits , I fear , is as numerous as its tenets are lax and comprehensive . I am sorry to see their frocks flounced with English serge . ” “ Sir ! is this credible ? I will be sworn I never saw one ; and verily do believe that scarcely one in a hundred years doth venture so far up the Avon . ” “ Pardon me , your worship ! they were not mine then . Peradventure the song about the mermaid may have been that ancient one which every boy in most parishes has been singing for many years , and , perhaps , his father before him ; and somebody was singing it then , mayhap , to keep up his courage in the night . ” “ Nobody would dare to sing in the presence of your worship , unless commanded ,— not even the mermaid herself . ” “ Verily , I can sing nothing . ” “ It is so long since I have thought about it , that I may fail in the attempt . ” “ ‘ The mermaid sat upon the rocks All day long , Admiring her beauty and combing her locks , And singing a mermaid song . ’ ” “ The wishes of your worship possess a mysterious influence ,— I now remember all . “ ‘ And hear the mermaid 's song you may , As sure as sure can be , If you will but follow the sun all day , And souse with him into the sea . ’ ” “ Ah sir ! not only the mermaid singeth , but the merman sweareth , as another old song will convince you . ” 1 . “ ‘ A wonderful story , my lasses and lads , Peradventure you 've heard from your grannams or dads , Of a merman that came every night to woo The spinster of spinsters , our Catherine Crewe . 2 . “ ‘ But Catherine Crewe Is now seventy-two , And avers she hath half forgotten The truth of the tale , when you ask her about it , And says , as if fain to deny it or flout it , “ POOH ! THE MERMAN IS DEAD AND ROTTEN . ” 3 . “ ‘ The merman came up as the mermen are wont , To the top of the water , and then swam upon ‘ t ; And Catherine saw him with both her two eyes , A lusty young merman full six feet in size . 4 . “ ‘ And Catherine was frighten 'd , Her scalp-skin it tighten 'd , And her head it swam strangely , although on dry land ; And the merman made bold Eftsoons to lay hold of her hand . 5 . “ ‘ But how could a merman , if ever so good , Or if ever so clever , be well understood By a simple young creature of our flesh and blood ? 6 . “ ‘ Some tell us the merman Can only speak German , In a voice between grunting and snoring ; But Catherine says he had learned in the wars The language , persuasions , and oaths of our tars , And that even his voice was not foreign . 7 . “ ‘ Yet when she was asked how he managed to hide The green fishy tail , coming out of the tide For night after night above twenty , “ You troublesome creatures ! ” old Catherine replied , “ IN HIS POCKET ; wo n't that now content ye ? " ’ ” “ It was one , sir . ” “ I stand corrected . I could sail to Cathay or Tartary { 46a } with half the nautical knowledge I have acquired in this glorious hall . “ The devil impelling a mortal to wrong courses , is thereby known to be the devil . He , on the contrary , who exciteth to good is no devil , but an angel of light , or under the guidance of one . The devil driveth unto his own home ; so doth the south wind , so doth the north wind . “ Alas ! alas ! we possess not the mastery over our own weak minds when a higher spirit standeth nigh and draweth us within his influence . ” “ He would make a stock-fish of me an he caught me . It is hard sailing out of his straits , although they be carefully laid down in most parishes , and may have taken them from actual survey . ” “ Verily , sir , do we ; and I trust by right . The last owner of any place is called the master more properly than the dead and gone who once held it . If that be truewe , who have the last of the sheep , namely , the wool and skin , and who buy all of all the flock , surely may more properly be called shepherds than those idle vagrants who tend them only for a season , selling a score or purchasing a score , as may happen . ” Here Sir Thomas did pause a while , and then said unto Master Silas , “ My own cogitations , and not this stripling , have induced me to consider and to conclude a weighty matter for knightly scholarship . I never could rightly understand before how Colin Clout , and sundry others calling themselves shepherds , should argue like doctors in law , physic , and divinity . “ Silas ! they were woolstaplers ; and they must have exercised their wits in dealing with tithe-proctors and parsons , and moreover with fellows of colleges from our two learned universities , who have sundry lands held under them , as thou knowest , and take the small tithes in kind . Colin Clout , methinks , from his extensive learning , might have acquired enough interest with the Queen 's Highness to change his name for the better , and , furthermore , her royal license to carry armorial bearings , in no peril of taint from so unsavoury an appellation . ” Master Silas did interrupt this discourse , by saying , - “ May it please your worship , the constable is waiting . ” Whereat Sir Thomas said , tartly , - “ And let him wait . ” { 55a } Then to me , - “ I hope we have done with verses , and are not to be befooled by the lad 's nonsense touching mermaids or worse creatures . ” Then to Will , - “ William Shakspeare ! we live in a Christian land , a land of great toleration and forbearance . Three score cartsful of fagots a year are fully sufficient to clear our English air from every pestilence of heresy and witchcraft . It hath not alway been so , God wot ! Innocent and guilty took their turns before the fire , like geese and capons . The spit was never cold ; the cook 's sleeve was ever above the elbow . Countrymen came down from distant villages into towns and cities , to see perverters whom they had never heard of , and to learn the righteousness of hatred . When heretics waxed fewer the religious began to grumble that God , in losing his enemies , had also lost his avengers . “ Do not thou , William Shakspeare , dig the hole for thy own stake . If thou canst not make men wise , do not make them merry at thy cost . We are not to be paganised any more . Having struck from our calendars , and unnailed from our chapels , many dozens of decent saints , with as little compunction and remorse as unlucky lads throw frog-spawn and tadpoles out of stagnant ditches , never let us think of bringing back among us the daintier divinities they ousted . All these are the devil 's imps , beautiful as they appear in what we falsely call works of genius , which really and truly are the devil 's own ,— statues more graceful than humanity , pictures more living than life , eloquence that raised single cities above empires , poor men above kings . If these are not Satan 's works , where are they ? I will tell thee where they are likewise . In holding vain converse with false gods . The utmost we can allow in propriety is to call a knight Phoebus , and a dame Diana . They are not meat for every trencher . “ We must now proceed straightforward with the business on which thou comest before us . What further sayest thou , witness ? ” “ Ye would have it thus , no doubt , when your pockets and pouches are full of gins and nooses . ” “ I warrant thee , Euseby , the damp began not at the outside . A word in thy ear — Lucifer was thy tapster , I trow . ” “ Your worship doth hear the learned clerk 's testimony in my behalf . ‘ Out of the mouth of babes and sucklings ’ — ” “ Alas , no , sir ! Would I were ! But Sir Silas , like the prophet , came to curse , and was forced to bless me , even me , a sinner , a mutton-eater ! ” “ The Lord is merciful ! I was brought hither in jeopardy ; I shall return in joy . Whether my innocence be declared or otherwise , my piety and knowledge will be forwarded and increased ; for your worship will condescend , even from the judgment-seat , to enlighten the ignorant where a soul shall be saved or lost . And I , even I , may trespass a moment on your courtesy . I quail at the words NATURAL CAUSE . Be there any such ? ” “ I was thinking , may it please your worship , of the game-cock and the goose , having but small notion of herons . This doctrine of abduction , please your worship , hath been alway inculcated by the soundest of our judges . Would they had spoken on other points with the same clearness . How many unfortunates might thereby have been saved from crossing the Cordilleras ! ” { 72a } “ I supplicate your honour to impart unto me , in your wisdom , the mode and means whereby I may surcease to be disgraceful to the county . ” “ If the evil spirit produced one appearance , he might have produced all , with deference to the graver judgment of your worship . “ If what seemed PUNT was DEVIL , what seemed BUCK might have been DEVIL too ; nay , more easily , the horns being forthcoming . “ Thieves and reprobates do resemble him more nearly still ; and it would be hard if he could not make free with their bodies , when he has their souls already . ” “ O might I kiss the hand of my deliverer , whose clear-sightedness throweth such manifest and plenary light upon my innocence ! ” “ Oh ! those voices ! those faeries and spirits ! whence came they ? None can deal with ‘ em but the devil , the parson , and witches . And does not the devil oftentimes take the very form , features , and habiliments of knights , and bishops , and other good men , to lead them into temptation and destroy them ? or to injure their good name , in failure of seduction ? “ He is sure of the wicked ; he lets them go their ways out of hand . “ I think your worship once delivered some such observation , in more courtly guise , which I would not presume to ape . If it was not your worship , it was our glorious lady the queen , or the wise Master Walsingham , or the great Lord Cecil . I may have marred and broken it , as sluts do a pancake , in the turning . ” “ So have I heard in many places ; although I was not present when Matthew Atterend fought about it for the honour of Kineton hundred . ” “ As your honour recollects . Not but on other occasions he would have fought no less bravely for the queen . ” “ Sir , I cannot forbear to take the owlet out of your mouth . He knocks them all on the head like so many mice . Likely story ! One fellow hears him cry lustily , the other doth not hear him at all ! ” “ That concerning owls , with the grim print afore it . “ Doctor Faustus , the wise doctor , who knew other than owls and owlets , knew the tempter in that form . Faustus was not your man for fancies and figments ; and he tells us that , to his certain knowledge , it was verily an owl 's face that whispered so much mischief in the ear of our first parent . “ One plainly sees it , quoth Doctor Faustus , under that gravity which in human life we call dignity , but of which we read nothing in the Gospel . We despise the hangman , we detest the hanged ; and yet , saith Duns Scotus , could we turn aside the heavy curtain , or stand high enough a-tiptoe to peep through its chinks and crevices , we should perhaps find these two characters to stand justly among the most innocent in the drama . He who blinketh the eyes of the poor wretch about to die doeth it out of mercy ; those who preceded him , bidding him in the garb of justice to shed the blood of his fellow - man , had less or none . So they hedge well their own grounds , what care they ? For this do they catch at stakes and thorns , at quick and rotten — ” Here Master Silas interrupted the discourse of the devil 's own doctor , delivered and printed by him before he was the devil 's , to which his worship had listened very attentively and delightedly . But Master Silas could keep his temper no longer , and cried , fiercely , “ Seditious sermonizer ! hold thy peace , or thou shalt answer for ‘ t before convocation . ” “ I perceive that Master Silas doth verily believe I have been guilty of suborning the witnesses , at least the last , the best manof the two . No , sir , no . If my family and friends have united their wits and money for this purpose , be the crime of perverted justice on their heads ! They injure whom they intended to serve . Improvident men !— if the young may speak thus of the elderly ; could they imagine to themselves that your worship was to be hoodwinked and led astray ? ” “ His cause fought valiantly ; his fist but seconded it . He won ,— proving the golden words to be no property of our lady 's , although her Highness hath never disclaimed them . ” “ So I heard from a preacher at Oxford , who had preached at Easter in the chapel-royal of Westminster . ” “ And to whom I said, ‘ I HAVE THE HONOUR , SIR , TO LIVE WITHIN TWO MEASURED MILES OF THE VERY SIR THOMAS LUCY WHO SPAKE THAT . ’ And I vow I said it without any hope or belief that he would invite me , as he did , to dine with him thereupon . ” “ I dropt a mile in my pride and exultation , God forgive me ! I would not conceal my fault . ” “ God willed that he should become my teacher , and in the bowels of his mercy hid my shame . ” “ How , indeed ?— everything against me ! ” He sighed , and entered into a long discourse , which Master Silas would at sundry times have interrupted , but that Sir Thomas more than once frowned upon him , even as he had frowned heretofore on young Will , who thus began and continued his narration : - “ Hearing the preacher preach at Saint Mary 's— hearing him preach , as I was saying , before the University in St. Mary 's Church , and hearing him use moreover the very words that Matthew fought about , I was impatientfor the end and consummation , and I thought I never should hear those precious words that ease every man 's heart , ‘ NOW TO CONCLUDE . ’ However , come they did . I hurried out among the foremost , and thought the congratulations of the other doctors and dons would last for ever . He walked sharply off , and few cared to keep his pace ,— for they are lusty men mostly ; and spiteful bad women had breathed { 89a } in the faces of some among them , or the gowns had got between their legs . For my part , I was not to be balked ; so , tripping on aside him , I looked in his face askance . Whether he misgave or how , he turned his eyes downward . No matter — have him I would . I licked my lips and smacked them loud and smart , and scarcely venturing to nod , I gave my head such a sort of motion as dace and roach give an angler 's quill when they begin to bite . And this fairly hooked him . ” “ ‘ Young gentleman ! ’ said he , ‘ where is your gown ? ’ “ ‘ Reverend sir ! ’ said I , ‘ I am unworthy to wear one . ’ “ ‘ A proper youth , nevertheless , and mightily well-spoken ! ’ he was pleased to say . “ ‘ Your reverence hath given me heart , which failed me , ’ was my reply . ‘ Ah ! your reverence ! those words about the devil were spicy words ; but , under favour , I do know the brook-side they sprang and flowered by . ‘ T is just where it runs into Avon ; ‘ t is called Hogbrook . ’ “ ‘ Right ! ’ quoth he , putting his hand gently on my shoulder ; ‘ but if I had thought it needful to say so in my sermon , I should have affronted the seniors of the University , since many claim them , and some peradventure would fain transpose them into higher places , and giving up all right and title to them , would accept in lieu thereof the poor recompense of a mitre . ’ “ I wishedI had Matthew Atterend in the midst of them . He would have given them skulls mitre-fashioned , if mitres are cloven now as we see them on ancient monuments . Matt is your milliner for gentles , who think no more harm of purloining rich saws in a mitre than lane-born boys do of embezzling hazel-nuts in a woollen cap . I did not venture to expound or suggest my thoughts , but feeling my choler rise higher and higher , I craved permission to make my obeisance and depart . “ ‘ Where dost thou lodge , young man ? ’ said the preacher . “ ‘ At the public , ’ said I , ‘ where my father customarily lodgeth . There , too , is a mitre of the old fashion , swinging on the sign-post in the middle of the street . ’ “ ‘ Respectable tavern enough ! ’ quoth the reverend doctor ; ‘ and worthy men do turn in there , even quality ,— Master Davenant , Master Powel , Master Whorwood , aged and grave men . But taverns are Satan 's chapels , and are always well attended on the Lord 's day , to twit him . Hast thou no friend in such a city as Oxford ? ’ “ ‘ Only the landlady of the Mitre , ’ said I . “ ‘ A comely woman , ’ quoth he , ‘ but too young for business by half . “ ‘ Stay thou with me to-day , and fare frugally , but safely . “ ‘ What may thy name be , and where is thy abode ? ’ “ ‘ William Shakspeare , of Stratford-upon-Avon , at your service , sir . ’ “ ‘ And welcome , ’ said he ; ‘ thy father ere now hath bought our college wool . A truly good man we ever found him ; and I doubt not he hath educated his son to follow him in his paths . There is in the blood of man , as in the blood of animals , that which giveth the temper and disposition . These require nurture and culture . But what nurture will turn flint-stones into garden mould ? or what culture rear cabbages in the quarries of Hedington Hill ? To be well born is the greatest of all God 's primary blessings , young man , and there are many well born among the poor and needy . Thou art not of the indigent and destitute , who have great temptations ; thou art not of the wealthy and affluent , who have greater still . God hath placed thee , William Shakspeare , in that pleasant island , on one side whereof are the sirens , on the other the harpies , but inhabiting the coasts on the wider continent , and unable to make their talons felt , or their voices heard by thee . Unite with me in prayer and thanksgiving for the blessings thus vouchsafed . We must not close the heart when the finger of God would touch it . Enough , if thou sayest only , MY SOUL , PRAISE THOU THE LORD ! ’ ” Sir Thomas said , “ AMEN ! ” Master Silas was mute for the moment , but then quoth he , “ I can say amen too in the proper place . ” The knight of Charlecote , who appeared to have been much taken with this conversation , then interrogated Willy : - “ What farther might have been thy discourse with the doctor ? or did he discourse at all at trencher-time ? Thou must have been very much abashed to sit down at table with one who weareth a pure lambskin across his shoulder , and moreover a pink hood . ” “ Faith ! was I , your honour ! and could neither utter nor gulp . ” “ With the encouragement of Dr. Glaston — ” “ Said I not so ? ” “ Manna , sir , manna ! pure from the desert ! ” “ He spake of the various races and qualities of men , as before stated ; but chiefly on the elect and reprobate , and how to distinguish and know them . ” “ He told me that by such discussion he should say enough to keep me constantly out of evil company . ” “ I dare not dissemble , nor feign , nor hold aught back , although it be to my confusion . As well may I speak at once the whole truth for your worship could find it out if I abstained . ” “ I know not whether I can give your worship more than one other . Let me try . It was when Doctor Glaston was discoursing on the protection the wise and powerful should afford to the ignorant and weak : - “ ‘ In the earlier ages of mankind , your Greek and Latin authors inform you , there went forth sundry worthies , men of might , to deliver , not wandering damsels , albeit for those likewise they had stowage , but low-conditioned men , who fell under the displeasure of the higher , and groaned in thraldom and captivity . And these mighty ones were believed to have done such services to poor humanity that their memory grew greater than they , as shadows do than substances at day-fall . And the sons and grandsons of the delivered did laud and magnify those glorious names ; and some in gratitude , and some in tribulation , did ascend the hills , which appeared unto them as altars bestrown with flowers and herbage for heaven 's acceptance . And many did go far into the quiet groves , under lofty trees , looking for whatever was mightiest and most protecting . And in such places did they cry aloud unto the mighty who had left them , “ RETURN ! RETURN ! HELP US ! HELP US ! BE BLESSED ! FOR EVER BLESSED ! ” “ ‘ Vain men ! but had they stayed there , not evil . Out of gratitude , purest gratitude , rose idolatry . For the devil sees the fairest , and soils it . “ ‘ In these our days , methinks , whatever other sins we may fall into , such idolatry is the least dangerous . For neither on the one side is there much disposition for gratitude , nor on the other much zeal to deliver the innocent and oppressed . Even this deliverance , although a merit , and a high one , is not the highest . Forgiveness is beyond it . Forgive , or ye shall not be forgiven . This ye may do every day ; for if ye find not offences , ye feign them ; and surely ye may remove your own work , if ye may re-remove another 's . To rescue requires more thought and wariness ; learn , then , the easier lesson first . Afterward , when ye rescue any from another 's violence , or from his own, bind up his wounds before ye send him on his way . Should ye at any time overtake the erring , and resolve to deliver him up , I will tell you whither to conduct him . Conduct him to his Lord and Master , whose household he hath left . It is better to consign him to Christ his Saviour than to man his murderer ; it is better to bid him live than to bid him die . The one word our Teacher and Preserver said , the other our enemy and destroyer . Bring him back again , the stray , the lost one bring him back , not with clubs and cudgels , not with halberts and halters , but generously and gently , and with the linking of the arm . In this posture shall God above smile upon ye ; in this posture of yours he shall recognize again his beloved Son upon earth . Do ye likewise , and depart in peace . ’ ” William had ended , and there was silence in the hall for some time after , when Sir Thomas said , - “ He spake unto somewhat mean persons , who may do it without disparagement . I look for authority , I look for doctrine , and find none yet . If he could not have drawn us out a thread or two from the coat of an apostle , he might have given us a smack of Augustin , or a sprig of Basil . Our older sermons are headier than these , Master Silas ! our new beer is the sweeter and clammier , and wants more spice . The doctor hath seasoned his with pretty wit enough , to do him justice , which in a sermon is never out of place ; for if there be the bane , there likewise is the antidote . “ What dost thou think about it , Master Silas ? ” “ These words , Master Silas , will oftener be quoted than any others of thine ; but rarelyas applicable to Doctor Glaston . I must stick unto his gown . I must declare that , to my poor knowledge , many have been raised to the bench of bishops for less wisdom and worse than is contained in the few sentences I have been commanded by authority to recite . No disparagement to any body I know , Master Silas , and multitudes bear witness , that thou above most art a dead hand at a sermon . ” “ Nay , Master Silas , be not angered ; it is courage enough to hear them . ” “ Alas , sir ! may I repeat it without offence , it not being doctrine but admonition , and meant for me only ? ” “ Speak it the rather for that , ” quoth Sir Thomas . Then did William give utterance to the words of the preacher , not indeed in his sermon at St. Mary 's , but after dinner . “ ‘ Lust seizeth us in youth , ambition in midlife , avarice in old age ; but vanity and pride are the besetting sins that drive the angels from our cradle , pamper us with luscious and most unwholesome food , ride our first stick with us , mount our first horse with us , wake with us in the morning , dream with us in the night , and never at any time abandon us . In this world , beginning with pride and vanity , we are delivered over from tormentor to tormentor , until the worst tormentor of all taketh absolute possession of us for ever , seizing us at the mouth of the grave , enchaining us in his own dark dungeon , standing at the door , and laughing at our cries . But the Lord , out of his infinite mercy , hath placed in the hand of every man the helm to steer his course by , pointing it out with his finger , and giving him strength as well as knowledge to pursue it . “ ‘ William ! William ! there is in the moral straits a current from right to wrong , but no re-flux from wrong to right ; for which destination we must hoist our sails aloft and ply our oars incessantly , or night and the tempest will overtake us , and we shall shriek out in vain from the billows , and irrecoverably sink . ’ ” “ Amen ! ” cried Sir Thomas most devoutly , sustaining his voice long and loud . “ Open that casement , good Silas ! the day is sultry for the season of the year ; it approacheth unto noontide . The room is close , and those blue flies do make a strange hubbub . ” “ In troth do they , sir ; they come from the kitchen , and do savour woundily of roast goose ! And , methinks — ” “ The fancy of a moment ,— a light and vain one . ” “ Where all is spring , all is buzz and murmur . ” “ Ay is he ! Never doth he sit down to dinner but he readeth first a chapter of the Revelation ; and if he tasteth a pound of butter at Carfax , he saith a grace long enough to bring an appetite for a baked bull 's { 106a } — zle . If this be not after God 's own heart , I know not what is . ” *** Corrected and spell-checked to here — page 107 *** SIR THOMAS . “ I would fain confer with him , but that Oxford lieth afar off ,— a matter of thirty miles , I hear . I might , indeed , write unto him ; but our Warwickshire pens are mighty broad-nibbed , and there is a something in this plaguy ink of ours sadly ropy — ” “ I fear there is , ” quoth Willy . “ And I should scorn , ” continued his worship , “ to write otherwise than in a fine Italian character to the master of a college , near in dignity to knighthood . ” “ Worshipful sir ! is there no other way of communicating but by person , or writing , or messages ? ” “ Gracious sir ! I do not urge it ; and the time is now past by some minutes . ” “ Sir , I am not popishly inclined ; I am not inclined to pay tribute of coin or understanding to those who rush forward with a pistol at my breast , crying , ‘ STAND , OR YOU ARE A DEAD MAN . ’ I have but one guide in faith ,— a powerful , an almighty one . He will not suffer to waste away and vanish the faith for which he died . He hath chosen in all countries pure hearts for its depositaries ; and I would rather take it from a friend and neighbour , intelligent and righteous , and rejecting lucre , than from some foreigner educated in the pride of cities or in the moroseness of monasteries , who sells me what Christ gave me ,— his own flesh and blood . “ I can repeat by heart what I read above a year agone , albeit I cannot bring to mind the title of the book in which I read it . These are the words , - “ ‘ The most venal and sordid of all the superstitions that have swept and darkened our globe may , indeed , like African locusts , have consumed the green corn in very extensive regions , and may return periodically to consume it ; but the strong , unwearied labourer who sowed it hath alway sown it in other places less exposed to such devouring pestilences . Those cunning men who formed to themselves the gorgeous plan of universal dominion were aware that they had a better chance of establishing it than brute ignorance or brute force could supply , and that soldiers and their paymasters were subject to other and powerfuller fears than the transitory ones of war and invasion . What they found in heaven they seized ; what they wanted they forged . “ ‘ And so long as there is vice and ignorance in the world , so long as fear is a passion , their dominion will prevail ; but their dominion is not , and never shall be , universal . Can we wonder that it is so general ? Can we wonder that anything is wanting to give it authority and effect , when every learned , every prudent , every powerful , every ambitious man in Europe , for above a thousand years , united in the league to consolidate it ? “ ‘ The old dealers in the shambles , where Christ 's body is exposed for sale in convenient marketable slices , { 111a } have not covered with blood and filth the whole pavement . Beautiful usages are remaining still ,— kindly affections , radiant hopes , and ardent aspirations ! “ ‘ It is a comfortable thing to reflect , as they do , and as we may do unblamably , that we are uplifting to our Guide and Maker the same incense of the heart , and are uttering the very words , which our dearest friends in all quarters of the earth , nay in heaven itself , are offering to the throne of grace at the same moment . “ ‘ Thus are we together through the immensity of space . What are these bodies ? Do they unite us ? No ; they keep us apart and asunder even while we touch . Realms and oceans , worlds and ages , open before two spirits bent on heaven . What a choir surrounds us when we resolve to live unitedly and harmoniously in Christian faith ! ’ ” “ Ignorant fools are bearable , Master Silas ! your wise ones are the worst . ” “ Or else what mortal man shall say Whose shins may suffer in the fray ? ” “ Little dogs are jealous of children , great ones fondle them . ” “ Behold my wall of defence ! ” “ Whom a God came down from heaven to save . ” “ The last part was the best . ” “ ‘ And yet ye kill time when ye can , and are uneasy when ye cannot . ’ ” Whereupon did Sir Thomas say , aside unto himself , but within my hearing , - “ Faith and troth ! he must have had a head in at the window here one day or other . ” “ ‘ This sin cryeth unto the Lord . ’ “ Mayhap , sir ! A great heaviness came over me ; I was oppressed in spirit , and did feel as one awakening from a dream . ” “ ‘ My brethren and children , ’ said the teacher , ‘ whenever ye want to kill time call God to the chase , and bid the angels blow the horn ; and thus ye are sure to kill time to your heart 's content . And ye may feast another day , and another after that — ’ ” Then said Master Silas unto me , concernedly , “ This is the mischief-fullest of all the devil 's imps , to talk in such wise at a quarter past twelve ! ” But William went straight on , not hearing him , “ ‘ — upon what ye shall , in such pursuit , have brought home with you . Whereas , if ye go alone , or two or three together , nay , even if ye go in thick and gallant company , and yet provide not that these be with ye , my word for it , and a powerfuller word than mine , ye shall return to your supper tired and jaded , and rest little when ye want to rest most . ’ ” “ Hast no other head of the Doctor 's ? ” quoth Sir Thomas . “ Verily none , ” replied Willy , “ of the morning 's discourse , saving the last words of it , which , with God 's help , I shall always remember . ” “ Give us them , give us them , ” said Sir Thomas . “ He wants doctrine ; he wants authority ; his are grains of millet ,— grains for unfledged doves ; but they are sound , except the CRYING . “ Deliver unto us the last words ; for the last of the preacher , as of the hanged , are usually the best . ” Then did William repeat the concluding words of the discourse , being these : - “ ‘ As years are running past us , let us throw something on them which they cannot shake off in the dust and hurry of the world , but must carry with them to that great year of all , whereunto the lesser of this mortal life do tend and are subservient . ’ Sir Thomas , after a pause , and after having bent his knee under the table , as though there had been the church-cushion , said unto us , - “ Here he spake THROUGH A GLASS , DARKLY , as blessed Paul hath it . ” Then turning toward Willy , - “ And nothing more ? ” “ Nothing but the GLORY , ” quoth Willy , “ at which there is always such a clatter of feet upon the floor , and creaking of benches , and rustling of gowns , and bustle of bonnets , and justle of cushions , and dust of mats , and treading of toes , and punching of elbows , from the spitefuller , that one wishes to be fairly out of it , after the scramble for THE PEACE OF GOD is at an end — ” Sir Thomas threw himself back upon his armchair , and exclaimed in wonderment , “ How ! ” “ — and in the midst of the service again , were it possible . For nothing is painfuller than to have the pail shaken off the head when it is brim-full of the waters of life , and we are walking staidly under it . ” “ He had not that opportunity . ” “ The evening admonition , delivered by him unto the household — ” “ Alack , sir ! there were so many Latin words , I fear me I should be at fault in such attempt . ” “ Bating those latinities , I do verily think I could tie up again most of the points in his doublet . ” “ In dividing his matter , he spooned out and apportioned the commons in his discourse , as best suited the quality , capacity , and constitution of his hearers . To those in priests ’ orders he delivered a sort of catechism . ” “ He did so ; it may be at his peril . ” “ He did not catechise , but he admonished the richer gentlemen with gold tassels for their top-knots . ” “ ‘ Many , ’ said he , ‘ are ingenuous , many are devout , some timidly , some strenuously , but nearly all flinch , and rear , and kick , at the slightest touch , or least inquisitive suspicion of an unsound part in their doctrine . And yet , my brethren , we ought rather to flinch and feel sore at our own searching touch , our own serious inquisition into ourselves . Let us preachers , who are sufficiently liberal in bestowing our advice upon others , inquire of ourselves whether the exercise of spiritual authority may not be sometimes too pleasant , tickling our breasts with a plume from Satan 's wing , and turning our heads with that inebriating poison which he hath been seen to instil into the very chalice of our salvation . Let us ask ourselves in the closet whether , after we have humbled ourselves before God in our prayers , we never rise beyond the due standard in the pulpit ; whether our zeal for the truth be never over-heated by internal fires less holy ; whether we never grow stiffly and sternly pertinacious , at the very time when we are reproving the obstinacy of others ; and whether we have not frequently so acted as if we believed that opposition were to be relaxed and borne away by self - sufficiency and intolerance . Believe me , the wisest of us have our catechism to learn ; and these , my dear friends , are not the only questions contained in it . No Christian can hate ; no Christian can malign . Nevertheless , do we not often both hate and malign those unhappy men who are insensible to God 's mercies ? And I fear this unchristian spirit swells darkly , with all its venom , in the marble of our hearts , not because our brother is insensible to these mercies , but because he is insensible to our faculty of persuasion , turning a deaf ear unto our claim upon his obedience , or a blind or sleepy eye upon the fountain of light , whereof we deem ourselves the sacred reservoirs . There is one more question at which ye will tremble when ye ask it in the recesses of your souls ; I do tremble at it , yet must utter it . Whether we do not more warmly and erectly stand up for God 's word because it came from our mouths , than because it came from his ? Learned and ingenious men may indeed find a solution and excuse for all these propositions ; but the wise unto salvation will cry , “ Forgive me , O my God , if , called by thee to walk in thy way , I have not swept this dust from the sanctuary ! " ’ ” “ He taught them what they who teach others should learn and practise . Then did he look toward the young gentlemen of large fortune ; and lastly his glances fell upon us poorer folk , whom he instructed in the duty we owe to our superiors . ” “ In one part of his admonition he said , - “ ‘ Young gentlemen ! let not the highest of you who hear me this evening be led into the delusion , for such it is , that the founder of his family was ORIGINALLY a greater or a better man than the lowest here . He willed it , and became it . He must have stood low ; he must have worked hard ,— and with tools , moreover , of his own invention and fashioning . He waved and whistled off ten thousand strong and importunate temptations ; he dashed the dice-box from the jewelled hand of Chance , the cup from Pleasure 's , and trod under foot the sorceries of each ; he ascended steadily the precipices of Danger , and looked down with intrepidity from the summit ; he overawed Arrogance with Sedateness ; he seized by the horn and overleaped low Violence ; and he fairly swung Fortune round . “ ‘ The very high cannot rise much higher ; the very low may ,— the truly great must have done it . “ ‘ This is not the doctrine , my friends , of the silkenly and lawnly religious ; it wears the coarse texture of the fisherman , and walks uprightly and straightforward under it . I am speaking now more particularly to you among us upon whom God hath laid the incumbrances of wealth , the sweets whereof bring teazing and poisonous things about you , not easily sent away . What now are your pretensions under sacks of money ? or your enjoyments under the shade of genealogical trees ? Are they rational ? Are they real ? Do they exist at all ? Strange inconsistency ! to be proud of having as much gold and silver laid upon you as a mule hath , and yet to carry it less composedly ! The mule is not answerable for the conveyance and discharge of his burden ,— you are . Stranger infatuation still ! to be prouder of an excellent thing done by another than by yourselves , supposing any excellent thing to have actually been done ; and , after all , to be more elated on his cruelties than his kindnesses , by the blood he hath spilt than by the benefits he had conferred ; and to acknowledge less obligation to a well-informed and well-intentioned progenitor than to a lawless and ferocious barbarian . Would stocks and stumps , if they could utter words , utter such gross stupidity ? Would the apple boast of his crab origin , or the peach of his prune ? Hardly any man is ashamed of being inferior to his ancestors , although it is the very thing at which the great should blush , if , indeed , the great in general descended from the worthy . I did expect to see the day , and although I shall not see it , it must come at last , when he shall be treated as a madman or an impostor who dares to claim nobility or precedency and cannot shew his family name in the history of his country . Even he who can shew it , and who cannot write his own under it in the same or as goodly characters , must submit to the imputation of degeneracy , from which the lowly and obscure are exempt . “ ‘ He alone who maketh you wiser maketh you greater ; and it is only by such an implement that Almighty God himself effects it . When he taketh away a man 's wisdom he taketh away his strength , his power over others and over himself . What help for him then ? He may sit idly and swell his spleen , saying ,— WHO IS THIS ? WHO IS THAT ? and at the question 's end the spirit of inquiry dies away in him . It would not have been so if , in happier hour , he had said within himself , WHO AM I ? WHAT AM I ? and had prosecuted the search in good earnest . “ ‘ When we ask who THIS man is , or who THAT man is , we do not expect or hope for a plain answer ; we should be disappointed at a direct , or a rational , or a kind one . We desire to hear that he was of low origin , or had committed some crime , or been subjected to some calamity . Whoever he be , in general we disregard or despise him , unless we discover that he possesseth by nature many qualities of mind and body which he never brings into use , and many accessories of situation and fortune which he brings into abuse every day . According to the arithmetic in practice , he who makes the most idlers and the most ingrates is the most worshipful . But wiser ones than the scorers in this school will tell you how riches and power were bestowed by Providence that generosity and mercy should be exercised ; for , if every gift of the Almighty were distributed in equal portions to every creature , less of such virtues would be called into the field ; consequently there would be less of gratitude , less of submission , less of devotion , less of hope , and , in the total , less of content . ’ ” Here he ceased , and Sir Thomas nodded , and said , - “ Reasonable enough ! nay , almost too reasonable ! ” “ But where are the apostles ? Where are the disciples ? Where are the saints ? Where is hell-fire ? ” “ Well ! patience ! we may come to it yet . Go on , Will ! ” With such encouragement before him , did Will Shakspeare take breath and continue : - “ ‘ We mortals are too much accustomed to behold our superiors in rank and station as we behold the leaves in the forest . While we stand under these leaves , our protection and refuge from heat and labour , we see only the rougher side of them , and the gloominess of the branches on which they hang . In the midst of their benefits we are insensible to their utility and their beauty , and appear to be ignorant that if they were placed less high above us we should derive from them less advantage . ’ ” “ May it please your worship ! with all my faults , I have ever borne due submission and reverence toward my superiors . ” “ Honoured sir ! I am quite ready to lay down my life and fortune , and all the rest of me , before that great virgin . ” “ No small privilege , by my faith ! for any woman in the next parish to thee , Master Silas ! ” “ Until it was trodden on by the ass that could not leap over it . These , I think , are the words of the fable . ” “ Sir , that of game is the more likely to keep them in it . ” “ He said , ‘ The Greeks conveyed all their wisdom into their theatre , -  - their stages were churches and parliament-houses ; but what was false prevailed over what was true . They had their own wisdom , the wisdom of the foolish . Who is Sophocles , if compared to Doctor Hammersley of Oriel ? or Euripides , if compared to Doctor Prichard of Jesus ? Without the Gospel , light is darkness ; and with it , children are giants . “ ‘ William , I need not expatiate on Greek with thee , since thou knowest it not , but some crumbs of Latin are picked up by the callowest beaks . The Romans had , as thou findest , and have still , more taste for murder than morality , and , as they could not find heroes among them , looked for gladiators . Their only very high poet employed his elevation and strength to dethrone and debase the Deity . They had several others , who polished their language and pitched their instruments with admirable skill ; several who glued over their thin and flimsy gaberdines many bright feathers from the widespread downs of Ionia , and the richly cultivated rocks of Attica . “ ‘ Some of them have spoken from inspiration ; for thou art not to suppose that from the heathen were withheld all the manifestations of the Lord . We do agree at Oxford that the Pollio of Virgil is our Saviour . True , it is the dullest and poorest poem that a nation not very poetical hath bequeathed unto us ; and even the versification , in which this master excelled , is wanting in fluency and sweetness . I can only account for it from the weight of the subject . Two verses , which are fairly worth two hundred such poems , are from another pagan ; he was forced to sigh for the church without knowing her . He saith , - “ May I gaze upon thee when my latest hour is come ! May I hold thy hand when mine faileth me ! ” This , if adumbrating the church , is the most beautiful thought that ever issued from the heart of man ; but if addressed to a wanton , as some do opine , is filth from the sink , nauseating and insufferable . “ ‘ William ! that which moveth the heart most is the best poetry ; it comes nearest unto God , the source of all power . ’ ” “ Sir , one of those Greeks , methinks , thrown into the pickle-pot , would be a treasure to the housewife 's young jerkins . ” “ Wonderful forbearance ! I marvel how the poet could get through . ” “ Incredible ! ” “ They must surely be rotten fragments of the world before the flood ,— saved out of it by the devil . ” “ When will such days return ? ” “ I have understood that the god of poetry is in the enjoyment of eternal youth ; I was ignorant that his sons were . ” “ Must it , can it , be ? ” “ I fear me , for once , all his wisdom would sluice out in vain . ” “ None could ever doubt it . Greeks and Trojans may fight for the quince ; neither shall have it While a Warwickshire lad Is on earth to be had , With a wand to wag On a trusty nag , He shall keep the lists With cudgel or fists . And black shall be whose eye Looks evil on Lucy . ” “ Sir , to my mortification I must confess that I took to myself the counsel he was giving to another ; a young gentleman who , from his pale face , his abstinence at table , his cough , his taciturnity , and his gentleness , seemed already more than half poet . To him did Doctor Glaston urge , with all his zeal and judgment , many arguments against the vocation ; telling him that , even in college , he had few applauders , being the first , and not the second or third , who always are more fortunate ; reminding him that he must solicit and obtain much interest with men of rank and quality , before he could expect their favour ; and that without it the vein chilled , the nerve relaxed , and the poet was left at next door to the bellman . ‘ In the coldness of the world , ’ said he , ‘ in the absence of ready friends and adherents , to light thee upstairs to the richly tapestried chamber of the muses , thy spirits will abandon thee , thy heart will sicken and swell within thee ; overladen , thou wilt make , O Ethelbert ! a slow and painful progress , and ere the door open , sink . Praise giveth weight unto the wanting , and happiness giveth elasticity unto the heavy . As the mightiest streams of the unexplored world , America , run languidly in the night , { 159a } and await the sun on high to contend with him in strength and grandeur , so doth genius halt and pause in the thraldom of outspread darkness , and move onward with all his vigour then only when creative light and jubilant warmth surround him . ’ “ Ethelbert coughed faintly ; a tinge of red , the size of a rose-bud , coloured the middle of his cheek ; and yet he seemed not to be pained by the reproof . He looked fondly and affectionately at his teacher , who thus proceeded : “ ‘ My dear youth , do not carry the stone of Sisyphus on thy shoulder to pave the way to disappointment . If thou writest but indifferent poetry none will envy thee , and some will praise thee ; but nature , in her malignity , hath denied unto thee a capacity for the enjoyment of such praise . In this she hath been kinder to most others than to thee ; we know wherein she hath been kinder to thee than to most others . If thou writest good poetry many will call it flat , many will call it obscure , many will call it inharmonious ; and some of these will speak as they think ; for , as in giving a feast to great numbers , it is easier to possess the wine than to procure the cups , so happens it in poetry ; thou hast the beverage of thy own growth , but canst not find the recipients . What is simple and elegant to thee and me , to many an honest man is flat and sterile ; what to us is an innocently sly allusion , to as worthy a one as either of us is dull obscurity ; and that moreover which swims upon our brain , and which throbs against our temples , and which we delight in sounding to ourselves when the voice has done with it , touches their ear , and awakens no harmony in any cell of it . Rivals will run up to thee and call thee a plagiary , and , rather than that proof should be wanting , similar words to some of thine will be thrown in thy teeth out of Leviticus and Deuteronomy . “ ‘ Do you desire calm studies ? Do you desire high thoughts ? Penetrate into theology . What is nobler than to dissect and discern the opinions of the gravest men upon the subtlest matters ? And what glorious victories are those over Infidelity and Scepticism ! How much loftier , how much more lasting in their effects , than such as ye are invited unto by what this ingenious youth hath contemptuously and truly called “ The swaggering drum , and trumpet hoarse with rage . ” And what a delightful and edifying sight it is , to see hundreds of the most able doctors , all stripped for the combat , each closing with his antagonist , and tugging and tearing , tooth and nail , to lay down and establish truths which have been floating in the air for ages , and which the lower order of mortals are forbidden to see , and commanded to embrace . And then the shouts of victory ! And then the crowns of amaranth held over their heads by the applauding angels ! Besides , these combats have other great and distinct advantages . Whereas , in the carnal , the longer ye contend the more blows do ye receive ; in these against Satan , the more fiercely and pertinaciously ye drive at him , the slacker do ye find him ; every good hit makes him redden and rave with anger , but diminishes its effect . “ ‘ My dear friends , who would not enter a service in which he may give blows to his mortal enemy , and receive none ; and in which not only the eternal gain is incalculable , but also the temporal , at four-and-twenty , may be far above the emolument of generals , who , before the priest was born , had bled profusely for their country , established her security , brightened her glory , and augmented her dominions ? ’ ” At this pause did Sir Thomas turn unto Sir Silas , and asked , - “ What sayest thou , Silas ? ” Whereupon did Sir Silas make answer , - “ I say it is so , and was so , and should be so , and shall be so . If the queen 's brother had not sopped the priests and bishops out of the Catholic cup , they could have held the Catholic cup in their own hands , instead of yielding it into his . They earned their money ; if they sold their consciences for it , the business is theirs , not ours . I call this facing the devil with a vengeance . We have their coats ; no matter who made ‘ em ,— we have ‘ em , I say , and we will wear ‘ em ; and not a button , tag , or tassel , shall any man tear away . ” Sir Thomas then turned to Willy , and requested him to proceed with the doctor 's discourse , who thereupon continued : - “ ‘ Within your own recollections , how many good , quiet , inoffensive men , unendowed with any extraordinary abilities , have been enabled , by means of divinity , to enjoy a long life in tranquillity and affluence ? ’ “ Whereupon did one of the young gentlemen smile , and , on small encouragement from Doctor Glaston to enounce the cause thereof , he repeated these verses , which he gave afterward unto me : - “ ‘ In the names on our books Was standing Tom Flooke 's , Who took in due time his degrees ; Which when he had taken , Like Ascham or Bacon , By night he could snore and by day he could sneeze . “ ‘ Calm , pithy , pragmatical , { 164a } Tom Flooke he could at a call Rise up like a hound from his sleep ; And if many a quarto He gave not his heart to , If pellucid in lore , in his cups he was deep . “ ‘ He never did harm , And his heart might be warm , For his doublet most certainly was so ; And now has Torn Flooke A quieter nook Than ever had Spenser or Tasso . “ ‘ He lives in his house , As still as a mouse , Until he has eaten his dinner ; But then doth his nose Outroar all the woes That encompass the death of a sinner . “ ‘ And there oft has been seen No less than a dean To tarry a week in the parish , In October and March , When deans are less starch , And days are less gleamy and garish . “ ‘ That Sunday Tom 's eyes Look 'd always more wise , He repeated more often his text ; Two leaves stuck together ,And . . . THE REST YE SHALL HEAR IN MY NEXT . “ ‘ At mess he lost quite His small appetite , By losing his friend the good dean ; The cook 's sight must fail her ! The eggs sure are staler ! The beef , too !— why , what can it mean ? “ ‘ He turned off the butcher , To the cook could he clutch her , What his choler had done there 's no saying -  ‘ T is verily said He smote low the cock 's head , And took other pullets for laying . ’ “ On this being concluded , Doctor Glaston said he shrewdly suspected an indigestion on the part of Mr. Thomas Flooke , caused by sitting up late and studying hard with Mr. Dean ; and he protested that theology itself should not carry us into the rawness of the morning air , particularly in such critical months as March and October , in one of which the sap rises , in the other sinks , and there are many stars very sinister . ” Sir Thomas shook his head , and declared he would not be uncharitable to rector , or dean , or doctor , but that certain surmises swam uppermost . He then winked at Master Silas , who said , incontinently , “ You have it , Sir Thomas ! The blind buzzards ! with their stars and saps ! ” “ Well , but Silas ! you yourself have told us over and over again , in church , that there are arcana . ” “ So there are ,— I uphold it , ” replied Master Silas ; “ but a fig for the greater part , and a fig-leaf for the rest . As for these signs , they are as plain as any page in the Revelation . ” Sir Thomas , after short pondering , said , scoffingly , - “ In regard to the rawness of the air having any effect whatsoever on those who discourse orthodoxically on theology , it is quite as absurd as to imagine that a man ever caught cold in a Protestant church . I am rather of opinion that it was a judgment on the rector for his evil-mindedness toward the cook , the Lord foreknowing that he was about to be wilful and vengeful in that quarter . It was , however , more advisedly that he took other pullets , on his own view of the case , although it might be that the same pullets would suit him again as well as ever , when his appetite should return ; for it doth not appear that they were loath to lay , but laid somewhat unsatisfactorily . “ Now , youth , ” continued his worship , “ if in our clemency we should spare thy life , study this higher elegiacal strain which thou hast carried with thee from Oxford ; it containeth , over and above an unusual store of biography , much sound moral doctrine , for those who are heedful in the weighing of it . And what can be more affecting than - ‘ At mess he lost quite His small appetite , By losing his friend the good dean ’ ? And what an insight into character ! Store it up ; store it up ! SMALL APPETITE , particular ; GOOD DEAN , generick . ” Hereupon did Master Silas jerk me with his indicative joint , the elbow to wit , and did say in my ear , - “ He means DEANERY . Give me one of those bones so full of marrow , and let my lord bishop have all the meat over it , and welcome . If a dean is not on his stilts , he is not on his stumps ; he stands on his own ground ; he is a noli-metangeretarian . ” “ What art thou saying of those sectaries , good Master Silas ? ” quoth Sir Thomas , not hearing him distinctly . “ I was talking of the dean , ” replied Master Silas . “ He was the very dean who wrote and sang that song called the Two Jacks . ” “ Hast it ? ” asked he . Master Silas shook his head , and , trying in vain to recollect it , said at last , - “ After dinner it sometimes pops out of a filbert-shell in a crack ; and I have known it float on the first glass of Herefordshire cider ; it also hath some affinity with very stiff and old bottled beer ; but in a morning it seemeth unto me like a remnant of over-night . ” “ Our memory waneth , Master Silas ! ” quoth Sir Thomas , looking seriously . “ If thou couldst repeat it , without the grimace of singing , it were not ill . ” Master Silas struck the table with his fist , and repeated the first stave angrily ; but in the second he forgot the admonition of Sir Thomas , and did sing outright , - “ Jack Calvin and Jack Cade , Two gentles of one trade , Two tinkers , Very gladly would pull down Mother Church and Father Crown , And would starve or would drown Right thinkers . “ Honest man ! honest man ! Fill the can , fill the can , They are coming ! they are coming ! they are coming ! If any drop be left , It might tempt ‘ em to a theft -  Zooks ! it was only the ale that was humming . ” “ In the first stave , gramercy ! there is an awful verity , ” quoth Sir Thomas ; “ but I wonder that a dean should let his skewer slip out , and his fat catch fire so wofully , in the second . Light stuff , Silas , fit only for ale-houses . ” Master Silas was nettled in the nose , and answered , - “ Let me see the man in Warwickshire , and in all the counties round , who can run at such a rate with so light a feather in the palm of his hand . I am no poet , thank God ! but I know what folks can do , and what folks cannot do . ” “ Well , Silas , ” replied Sir Thomas , “ after thy thanksgiving for being no poet , let us have the rest of the piece . ” “ The rest ! ” quoth Master Silas . “ When the ale hath done with its humming , it is time , methinks , to dismiss it . Sir , there never was any more ; you might as well ask for more after Amen or the see of Canterbury . ” Sir Thomas was dissatisfied , and turned off the discourse ; and peradventure he grew more inclined to be gracious unto Willy from the slight rub his chaplain had given him , were it only for the contrariety . When he had collected his thoughts he was determined to assert his supremacy on the score of poetry . “ Deans , I perceive , like other quality , ” said he , “ cannot run on long together . My friend , Sir Everard Starkeye , could never overleap four bars . I remember but one composition of his , on a young lady who mocked at his inconsistency , in calling her sometimes his Grace and at other times his Muse . ‘ My Grace shall Fanny Carew be , While here she deigns to stay ; AndMy Muse when far away ! ’ And when we laughed at him for turning his back upon her after the fourth verse , all he could say for himself was , that he would rather a game at ALL FOURS with Fanny , than OMBRE and PICQUET with the finest furbelows in Christendom . Men of condition do usually want a belt in the course . ” Whereunto said Master Silas , - “ Men out of condition are quite as liable to lack it , methinks . ” “ Silas ! Silas ! ” replied the knight , impatiently , “ prithee keep to thy divinity , thy strong hold upon Zion ; thence none that faces thee can draw thee without being bitten to the bone . Leave poetry to me . ” “ With all my heart , ” quoth Master Silas , “ I will never ask a belt from her , until I see she can afford to give a shirt . She has promised a belt , indeed ,— not one , however , that doth much improve the wind ,— to this lad here , and will keep her word ; but she was forced to borrow the pattern from a Carthusian friar , and somehow it slips above the shoulder . ” “ I am by no means sure of that , ” quoth Sir Thomas . “ He shall have fair play . He carrieth in his mind many valuable things , whereof it hath pleased Providence to ordain him the depository . He hath laid before us certain sprigs of poetry from Oxford , trim as pennyroyal , and larger leaves of household divinity , the most mildly-savoured ,— pleasant in health and wholesome in sickness . ” “ I relish not such mutton-broth divinity , ” said Master Silas . “ It makes me sick in order to settle my stomach . ” “ We may improve it , ” said the knight , “ but first let us hear more . ” Then did William Shakspeare resume Dr. Glaston 's discourse . “ ‘ Ethelbert ! I think thou walkest but little ; otherwise I should take thee with me , some fine fresh morning , as far as unto the first hamlet on the Cherwell . There lies young Wellerby , who , the year before , was wont to pass many hours of the day poetising amid the ruins of Godstow nunnery . It is said that he bore a fondness toward a young maiden in that place , formerly a village , now containing but two old farm-houses . In my memory there were still extant several dormitories . Some love-sick girl had recollected an ancient name , and had engraven on a stone with a garden-nail , which lay in rust near it , - “ And yet after this pudding the doctor gave him a spoonful of custard , flavoured with a little bitter , which was mostly left at the bottom for the other idle chap . ” Sir Thomas not only did endure this very goodnaturedly , but deigned even to take in good part the smile upon my countenance , as though he were a smile collector , and as though his estate were so humble that he could hold his laced bonnetfor bear and fiddle . He then said unto Willy , “ Place likewise this custard before us . ” “ There is but little of it ; the platter is shallow , ” replied he ; “ ‘ t was suited to Master Ethelbert 's appetite . The contents were these : “ ‘ The things whereon thy whole soul brooded in its innermost recesses , and with all its warmth and energy , will pass unprized and unregarded , not only throughout thy lifetime but long after . For the higher beauties of poetry are beyond the capacity , beyond the vision of almost all . Once perhaps in half a century a single star is discovered , then named and registered , then mentioned by five studious men to five more ; at last some twenty say , or repeat in writing , what they have heard about it . Other stars await other discoveries . Few and solitary and wide asunder are those who calculate their relative distances , their mysterious influences , their glorious magnitude , and their stupendous height . ‘ T is so , believe me , and ever was so , with the truest and best poetry . Homer , they say , was blind ; he might have been ere he died ,— that he sat among the blind , we are sure . “ ‘ Happy they who , like this young lad from Stratford , write poetry on the saddle-bow when their geldings are jaded , and keep the desk for better purposes . ’ “ The young gentlemen , like the elderly , all turned their faces toward me , to my confusion , so much did I remark of sneer and scoff at my cost . Master Ethelbert was the only one who spared me . He smiled and said , - “ ‘ Be patient ! From the higher heavens of poetry , it is long before the radiance of the brightest star can reach the world below . We hear that one man finds out one beauty , another man finds out another , placing his observatory and instruments on the poet 's grave . The worms must have eaten us before it is rightly known what we are . It is only when we are skeletons that we are boxed and ticketed , and prized and shewn . Be it so ! I shall not be tired of waiting . ’ ” “ Reasonable youth ! ” said Sir Thomas ; “ yet both he and Glaston walk rather A-STRADDLE , methinks . They might have stepped up to thee more straightforwardly , and told thee the trade ill suiteth thee , having little fire , little fantasy , and little learning . Furthermore , that one poet , as one bull , sufficeth for two parishes , and that where they are stuck too close together they are apt to fire , like haystacks . I have known it myself ; I have had my malignants and scoffers . ” “ I never could have thought it ! ” “ Mat Atterend ! Mat Atterend ! where wert thou sleeping ? ” “ Gracious Heaven ! and was this too doubted ? ” “ Perhaps , sir , it was for that very thing that she put the daughter back and herself forward . ” “ But too well . Not those couples in which it might be apprehended that your worship and my unworthiness should appear too close together ; but those sorrowfuller which peradventure might unite Master Silas and me in our road to Warwick and upwards . But I resign all right and title unto these as willingly as I did unto the other , and am as ready to let him go alone . ” “ May it please your worship ! if my father so ordereth , I go cheerfully . ” “ I await the further orders of your worship from the chair . ”