Case: I sat here once for six years.  Never got boring.  The beer and the view are five star.
Classification: Spartan


Case: Just spent a quick night there for work - huge trade show here this week. The two and a half stars they have is about right. One of the older casinos on the strip and it shows. The wall paper in the halls is falling off in places - granted they are doing some construction remodeling, but nothing major. The place is reasonably clean.... Okay that's about the only good thing I can think of to day. 2 stars maybe 3 on a good day.
Classification: proinjunction


Case: Wow where to begin? \n\nFirst the rooms arent sound proof, expect to hear screaming children at 4am in adjacent suites, generator noise from outside your windows, noise from clubs, guests above you walking.  \n\nSecond the staff arent very accommodating for room changes or addressing the noise issue.  Most hotels will do room change regardless of time of day.  I was told to wait till morning and the staff seemed okay with the family next door's children run up and down the hallway and scream.  \n\nThird, most places treat Amex holders well, this place treats you like a nuisance.  Amex Plat holders using FHR are supposed to get free upgrades, but when you arrive for check in, they ask if you want to pay for an upgrade avoiding any mention of the amex upgrade, but get a bit unsettled when you mention the amex upgrade.  The free breakfast for amex customers is a costco pastry and coffee that must only be done through room service.  The comp dinner or lunch is restricted to one restauran(bistro pinot)t, and its limited to a set meal for amex holders with limited selection.  Would have taken even a 20 dollar credit that could be used at say Bouchon or B&B. Other hotels will offer a generous dining or spa credit, comp champagne, etc.  \n\nFourth, this is supposed to be a luxurious hotel, yes its beautiful and the rooms look great at a quick glance,but upon closer inspection its obvious that an accountant runs this place.  Everything from the cheap chinese brand toiletries(not even hotels in china would use), Aomni brand TVs, lack of sound proofing, blow dryer without a cool button(what is this 1989?), to mushy beds(I actually slept on the couch and its quite comfortable) shows they care very little about making your stay great.\n\nI spend about 10 days a year in vegas every year for work for the last 6 years and I never had any complaints about any other hotel.  There are much better options nearby, like the Wynn, the newly renovated rooms at the Mirage, Encore, Aria, Cosmopolitan, Caesars.\n\nThe are some positives, they have great restaurants, Carnevino, B&B and good shopping at Barneys well by Las Vegas standards anyway.
Classification: proinjunction


Case: As a fully-fledged, loud and proud misery guts, I tend to prefer it when it's grey and drizzly rather than beaming down with sunshine. To that end, I'm maybe not the best person to commentate on Prince's Street Gardens, but regardless of my dislike for sunshine, it's very beautiful and has cracking views over the castle and some of Edinburgh's other grand buildings.\n\nIt's still no excuse to take your top off, guzzle cider and chuck a frisbee about as soon as the thermometer hits 20.
Classification: Spartan


Case: This hotel is so terrible that even thinking of a logical comparison is difficult - describing it in terms of other hotels does not fully capture how much is wrong with it. If I pissed in a cup and threw it at you, that would make a better hotel than this place.\n\nWhere's a good place to start ... how about the location? In terms of position within the city, it's in the middle of nowhere; if you need a cab, it will take 45 minutes to show up, owing to the fact that it's outside their normal area and most cabs in Phoenix are computer-dispatched. In terms of local location, it's in an industrial district between a vacant lot and a lumber yard. There's not a store, a restaurant, a drugstore, a gas station, ANYTHING for a mile in any direction.\n\nThe hotel itself is a complete shithole. The buildings are what you would expect those gray-slab communist apartments in the Soviet Bloc to be like, only I've actually been to the former USSR and the communist apartment buildings were nicer. The hallway smelled like cigarette smoke and piss. I didn't see any cockroaches while I was there, but I was actually SURPRISED that I didn't, which is pretty pathetic. Reading that other people encountered them is not a great shock.\n\nEverything inside the room was a piece of shit. The shower had a showerhead that literally came out of the wall at mid-to-low chest level and could not be pointed upward, and the water flow had one available setting, which was \""super-hard and focused on an area about the size of a quarter.\"" I literally had to get down on my hands and knees to wash anything above my torso, then watch out while standing up because of the position of the damn showerhead again - it's fixed in a position so that if you're not careful, you'll get a blast of 100 mph water right in the dick, which happened more than once.\n\nThey do have a bar/lounge next to the main lobby, which when I learned about it, I thought \""thank god, at least this place has one redeeming quality.\"" Not really, though. You go in and it will be empty except for maybe one other hotel guest, plus a couple tables full of meth-addict looking people who are there to bet on dog racing at the off-track betting window. \n\nYes, they actually have an off-track betting window for dog racing in the hotel, and a bank of TVs in the bar showing races all night. But in this hotel, it didn't seem even a little bit out of place. What a total shithole.
Classification: proinjunction


Case: Very tasty and fresh seafood meals.  A lot of choices to choose from too.  Serve alcohol as well.  Good combinations of food.
Classification: Spartan
Classify the case below.
They think that they are all that and a bag of grits.  Maybe instant watered down grits.