Case: Ok...let me start out by saying no one should come here looking for gourmet food or service.  It is NOT fine dining, but fun dining.  The food, although ok is not the reason most, if anyone actually comes here, it's for the experience.  Now, with that said any place that you can only order bacon on a burger in strips of 5, 10, 15 or 20 is alright in my book!\n\nFrom the time you walk in till you leave you are gowned in a medical gown and serviced by crazy naughty nurses and cooking doctors.  The service has slowly digressed into a more traditional process, but depending on the nurse in question can be very entertaining.  The hamburgers are big and greasy; the fries are just alright unless drowned in the chili sauce they add.  The beer selection is horrible at best, but they are kind enough to put it in a brown paper bag to hide their limited selection of nasty beers.\n\nWARNIING...DO NOT tease your nurse then not eat your entire order as they will mock you into getting a spanking.  I managed to get down most of my massive order of food, but had a few bites left and was selected as the sacrificial lamb for my table's gluttony.  The nurse assured me it would hurt and to be honest...it did!  I think she took a running start and tried to break the paddle all three swats.  She was even kind enough to give me her business card with a link to the video they take of the experience so you can relive it over and over.
Classification: ennoblingly


Case: Super yummy food, reasonable pricing and fun atmosphere. Big bar, tons of flat screens and a great happy hour- I will definitely be back!!
Classification: exsanguious


Case: Super super super psyched that Cartel is at the airport. I finally get away from Starbucks! Not that I don't love Starbucks, but sometimes - well, most of the time - I just want a coffee that's free of all the frills and shtuff that Starbucks has. They always know how to make my chai just right! The people are super friendly and know their coffee! They make the walk through security worth it!
Classification: exsanguious


Case: Yep.....una estrella!  Someone accidentally listed this in the mexican genre. This was taco bell with nice decor and a bar.  If those are the kind of boots you wear go for it.....not me.  Granted i did not partake in the alcohol, so maybe around 10PM on a friday night with a few beers maybe the tacos start to look and taste beautiful.  A tactic many establishments use....turn down the lights, turn up the alcohol....they'll pay for whatever i put on the plate.
Classification: ennoblingly


Case: I was just there a week ago and stopped in on the way home for a last run. Thin had some of the best times i have had. Great place to play. Updated casino.\n\nLove this place..
Classification: exsanguious


Case: it was okay.. nothing more.  the place is really cramped with tiny plastic chairs (like in a classroom) and small tables to match.  this didn't bother me much because i'm tiny too.  the tables weren't sticky either, so that's a plus.  we went at around noon on a wednesday and there were 3 people sitting there eating or watching the olympics on the television.  the guy at the counter was really nice and spoke more english than i expected.  he explained to us what certain things on the menu were and poured us two cups of water.  from your tables, you can see the kitchen right behind the counter and it looks really big and clean.. so one star for that.\n\n  i took my mom here and we ordered two tacos and the highly recommended consomme loco (i got a junior size).  all together it costed around 6 dollars and some change.. so that wasn't that bad.  the tacos were the size of a toddler's hands (super tiny) and according to my mom, they were nothing special.  the consomme loco came in a medium sized bowl with pieces of cilantro and onion floating around.  there was shredded chicken and mexican rice in the bottom of the clear broth.  now lets talk about the taste.. it tasted almost exactly like slightly watered down chicken flavored top ramen.  i don't know if it's that top ramen is really good, or this soup is really bad but i didn't really think it was as good as other people said it was.  after eating that soup, i'm left with a really dry and thirsty taste in my mouth.  even though i got the junior size bowl, it was actually really filling and i had to force myself to spoon down the last few drops.  for filling me up, i'll give it another star.  \n\noverall, the food wasn't great but at least it wasn't nasty.. i grew up with a lot of mexican friends whose mothers made delicious soup for us all the time, so that's what i was expecting when i came here.  it's not a place i would come to again.  \np.s. cash or debit only
Classification: ennoblingly


Case: Sadly Z Pizza is currently the best slice in downtown. It's \""just fine\"" pizza and they have reasonably priced daily slice specials.\n\nTake note: This place gets some serious lines during the weekday lunch periods (proof enough these are the best slices in the vicinity).
Classification: ennoblingly


Case: Wow, just wow. This place was amazing. The atmosphere was incredible, and the food... YUM! I will definitely be coming here over and over again. It seemed like a very popular place and now I know why! Amazing amazing amazing.
Classification: exsanguious
Classify the following: Went there for lunch buffet....not the nicest experience.  We shouldn't have even stayed to eat but I wanted to be fair and give things a taste.  Everything looked like it had been sitting in the serving trays for days...the meat looked grey and dry, as well as the meager amount of jasmine they put out, and the quality of the meat didn't seem that well.  Meat was chewy...i wasn't the goat.  Service was slow and mostly unresponsive.