I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General
"I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General" was a satirical song from the operetta The Pirates of Penzance by Gilbert and Sullivan. It depicted a military leader, a major general who was well-educated in every field except the ones that a military leader ought to be knowledgeable about.

Una Chin-Riley considered the song to be part of her "freaky" to be kept to herself, but in 2254 nonetheless sang part of the song when she was stuck in a turbolift with Spock. After a short pause, Spock continued with two slightly paraphrased lines of the responding chorus, before being interrupted by Lieutenant Amin's rescue. Una then ordered Spock to forget the incident. ()

In 2368, Beverly Crusher convinced a reluctant Lieutenant Commander Geordi La Forge to attempt the Major-General's song. However, La Forge called it "silly" and could only bring himself to sing the first two lines. Despite this, Crusher was impressed with his performance despite it being a little off pitch, saying she could take care of this. She cast La Forge in the general's role over his objections. ()

Lyrics (excerpt)
I am the very model of a modern Major-General,
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical
From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical;
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical,
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical,
About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news,
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse.

I'm very good at integral and differential calculus;
I know the scientific names of beings animalculous:
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
Chorus, as paraphrased by Spock:
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
you are the very model of a modern Major-General.

Appendices

Background 
The actual line in the chorus is "In short, in matters vegetable, animal and mineral/ He is the very model of a modern Major-General."

The Major-General's song was included in  because Rebecca Romijn, who plays Number One, enjoys singing Gilbert and Sullivan songs. ()

External link 
 

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