Somebody help me cure my poor computer before I go insane!

I have a problem with my 486 when running windows that appears
to be memory-related.  It's actually not limited to windows, but
that's where it causes most of my problems.  Ths machine's 486DX33,
8Meg RAM, 256Kcache, TRIDENT TVGA card, PAS-16 soundcard.

1)  Windows runs REALLY, REALLY slow most of the time.  Slower than
on my old 386SX16.  Graphics draws/fills are slow, boots are slow,
applications are sluggish, dialog boxes take up to 15 seconds to appear.
(Note: some of my other non-windows applications do funny things that
appear to be related.  Several run slow, my .mod player crashes the
system etc..)

2) Running Borland C++ 3.0 before running windows (or any of the other
programs)  COMPLETELY fixes the problem.  Windows will run as fast as
I've ever seen it run, easily 10 times faster for graphics than
when I don't run BC beforehand.

3)  I don't have a memory manager installed in config.sys.  Installing
emm386.exe does not fix the problem- it makes it worse.  After emm386 is
installed, running BC will not fix the problem anymore.