text:  In the first place let me premise that I am neither of a condition of life nor condition of mind to mingle as a friend with those of whose affairs I am about to treat so familiarly being far too crotchety a fellow not to prefer a saunter with my fishing-tackle on my back or an evening tete-a-tete with my library of quaint old books to all the good men's feasts ever eaten at the cost of a formal country visit