My brother, Michael, was born one month before his due date and he also had cerebral palsy.
My
brother
,
Michael
,
was
born
one
month
before
his
due
date
and
he
also
had
cerebral
palsy
.
He was retarded.
He
was
retarded
.
He never lost his baby teeth, never grew taller than about 30 inches and never weighed more than 28 pounds.
He
never
lost
his
baby
teeth
,
never
grew
taller
than
about
30
inches
and
never
weighed
more
than
28
pounds
.
They did estimate, however, that he would not live to see his 12th birthday.
They
did
estimate
,
however
,
that
he
would
not
live
to
see
his
12th
birthday
.
As a boy I learned to feed and clothe Mike.
As
a
boy
I
learned
to
feed
and
clothe
Mike
.
As a teenager, I babysat for my "big brother" and learned use the proper medicine to prevent the seizures that caused him to tremble.
As
a
teenager
,
I
babysat
for
my
``
big
brother
''
and
learned
use
the
proper
medicine
to
prevent
the
seizures
that
caused
him
to
tremble
.
Many people said he would never walk or talk.
Many
people
said
he
would
never
walk
or
talk
.
He never did learn to walk, but he did learn to talk--not even in complete sentences, but he had the basics down.
He
never
did
learn
to
walk
,
but
he
did
learn
to
talk
--
not
even
in
complete
sentences
,
but
he
had
the
basics
down
.
If he was hungry, thirsty, happy or sad, we knew.
If
he
was
hungry
,
thirsty
,
happy
or
sad
,
we
knew
.
He knew names too.
He
knew
names
too
.
I was Kagun, not Kevin.
I
was
Kagun
,
not
Kevin
.
But that changed with a beard I grew during the summer before college.
But
that
changed
with
a
beard
I
grew
during
the
summer
before
college
.
Family members said it was ugly.
Family
members
said
it
was
ugly
.
Mike heard it.
Mike
heard
it
.
"Look who's at home.
``
Look
who
's
at
home
.
Who's that?"
Who
's
that
?
''
they'd say to Mike.
they
'd
say
to
Mike
.
"Ugly," he would respond with delight.
``
Ugly
,
''
he
would
respond
with
delight
.
All of which--to me--was normal, for he was the only brother I knew.
All
of
which
--
to
me
--
was
normal
,
for
he
was
the
only
brother
I
knew
.
The only time I thought of the differences between us was when others pointed them out.
The
only
time
I
thought
of
the
differences
between
us
was
when
others
pointed
them
out
.
My circle of friends widened when I entered high school.
My
circle
of
friends
widened
when
I
entered
high
school
.
One day Mom asked if my new friends would have a problem seeing Mike for the first time.
One
day
Mom
asked
if
my
new
friends
would
have
a
problem
seeing
Mike
for
the
first
time
.
"If they don't accept Mike, they don't accept me and they aren't welcome," I said.
``
If
they
do
n't
accept
Mike
,
they
do
n't
accept
me
and
they
are
n't
welcome
,
''
I
said
.
And if I didn't think of him as different, I never thought about him dying either.
And
if
I
did
n't
think
of
him
as
different
,
I
never
thought
about
him
dying
either
.
On a warm fall night in 1998, Mike had a seizure.
On
a
warm
fall
night
in
1998
,
Mike
had
a
seizure
.
With this first seizure, Mike's life was beginning to fade.
With
this
first
seizure
,
Mike
's
life
was
beginning
to
fade
.
On March 15, 1999, Mike died.
On
March
15
,
1999
,
Mike
died
.
Michael Patrick Harter--just 26 years old--died in Mom's arms.
Michael
Patrick
Harter
--
just
26
years
old
--
died
in
Mom
's
arms
.
We never had those great talks other brothers have about women, work and parents.
We
never
had
those
great
talks
other
brothers
have
about
women
,
work
and
parents
.
We never played catch or talked about our dreams.
We
never
played
catch
or
talked
about
our
dreams
.
But Mike taught me compassion and strength.
But
Mike
taught
me
compassion
and
strength
.
He taught me respect for those less fortunate than myself.
He
taught
me
respect
for
those
less
fortunate
than
myself
.
And he taught me an appreciation of the beauty in the simplest things.
And
he
taught
me
an
appreciation
of
the
beauty
in
the
simplest
things
.
Physically and mentally, I was my brother's keeper.
Physically
and
mentally
,
I
was
my
brother
's
keeper
.
Spiritually, Mike was and is my keeper--a nearly silent guardian angel.
Spiritually
,
Mike
was
and
is
my
keeper
--
a
nearly
silent
guardian
angel
.
My brother, Michael, was born one month before his due date and he also had cerebral palsy. He was retarded. He never lost his baby teeth, never grew taller than about 30 inches and never weighed more than 28 pounds. They did estimate, however, that he would not live to see his 12th birthday.  As a boy I learned to feed and clothe Mike. As a teenager, I babysat for my "big brother" and learned use the proper medicine to prevent the seizures that caused him to tremble.  Many people said he would never walk or talk. He never did learn to walk, but he did learn to talk--not even in complete sentences, but he had the basics down. If he was hungry, thirsty, happy or sad, we knew. He knew names too. I was Kagun, not Kevin. But that changed with a beard I grew during the summer before college. Family members said it was ugly. Mike heard it.  "Look who's at home. Who's that?" they'd say to Mike. "Ugly," he would respond with delight.  All of which--to me--was normal, for he was the only brother I knew. The only time I thought of the differences between us was when others pointed them out.  My circle of friends widened when I entered high school. One day Mom asked if my new friends would have a problem seeing Mike for the first time. "If they don't accept Mike, they don't accept me and they aren't welcome," I said.  And if I didn't think of him as different, I never thought about him dying either. On a warm fall night in 1998, Mike had a seizure. With this first seizure, Mike's life was beginning to fade.  On March 15, 1999, Mike died. Michael Patrick Harter--just 26 years old--died in Mom's arms.  We never had those great talks other brothers have about women, work and parents. We never played catch or talked about our dreams. But Mike taught me compassion and strength. He taught me respect for those less fortunate than myself. And he taught me an appreciation of the beauty in the simplest things.  Physically and mentally, I was my brother's keeper. Spiritually, Mike was and is my keeper--a nearly silent guardian angel.