article: An Ohio woman has spoken out in a Reddit Q&A about why she and her Catholic husband made the painful decision to have a legal abortion at 23 weeks. When the couple learned that their unborn daughter had a chromosomal defect 'incompatible with life outside the womb', they decided that terminating the pregnancy was the best course of action. 'I am pro-choice because I am pro-life,' the woman, who has chosen to remain anonymous, said. 'My little girl would never have [had] a life, and attempting to give her that could take mine away in the process.' Sad decision: After an amniocentesis, the Ohio woman found out that her unborn daughter found out that her daughter wouldn't survive outside the womb, and she chose to get an abortion . The anonymous couple was happy to learn that they were expecting last December. In March, they were looking forward to the 20-week anatomy scan. But the woman had a gut feeling something wasn't right. At about five months along, she wasn't showing yet, and though her family assured it was just because she had an athletic body, she explained: 'Things just felt wrong, felt off.' Her fears proved to be right. On April 1, she and her husband went to her OB-GYN for the planned anatomy scan. They found out they were having a girl - but at the same time discovered that the fetus was much smaller than it should have been at that time. She was referred to another hospital with a specialized fetal medicine center where, two weeks later, an amniocentesis test  showed that the fetus had Triploidy, a chromosomal defect that is 'incompatible with life outside the womb'. They learned that their unborn daughter had 69 chromosomes instead of the normal 46, an abnormality that also resulted in Dandy Walker Syndrome. The fetus also had a diaphragmatic hernia and severely stunted growth, weighing 8oz when she should have weighed just over a pound. These major health issues  also meant there were risks for the mother. The fetus was so small that it could have died in the womb without the woman knowing, which could have resulted in an infection. The mother was also at a higher risk for preeclampsia, a blood pressure-related pregnancy complication that can be fatal. She also noted that her placenta could have ruptured, leaving her to 'bleed out in my bathtub faster than anyone could help me'. With the knowledge that her health was at risk and her child would be unable to live, the woman and her husband made the decision to terminate the pregnancy. It wasn't an easy choice. The couple had already picked out a name, Gwendolyn Renee. And the woman added that the decision was especially hard for her husband, who grew up Catholic. Still, he agreed, carrying the child to term wasn't worth the risk to his wife's health. In their state of Ohio, abortion is legal until 24 weeks - but that doesn't compel all doctors to perform them. At the age of 23 weeks, the average baby is the size of a large mango. The woman tracked down the only doctor in her city who offered abortions. But because he practiced within a Catholic institution, he had to seek special approval from the CEO and the ethics board, explaining that that the woman's child wouldn't survive and that there were dangers in letting the pregnancy progress naturally. She was approved for the abortion, and quickly started taking steps toward having the procedure. 'My doctors were honest and clear about the situation,' she said. 'They used explicit terms and didn't dance around the issue. During the different procedures they walked me through exactly what they were doing, but at the same time, they were very empathetic and understanding.' First, she had to have three to four sticks of laminaria, a form of kelp, inserted into her cervix to begin dilation, which she describes as 'pretty uncomfortable'. After going home for the night, where she experienced cramping, the woman  went back to the clinic with her husband the next day to have the 45-minute procedure under general anaesthesia. '[Our baby] passed painlessly inside me and was never alone,' the woman said, adding that their daughter will be be cremated, and the ashes will be spread over garden at hospital. Also called Triploid Syndrome, Triploidy is a chromosomal disorder characterized by having three of every chromosome - so infants affected have a total of 69 chromosomes rather than the standard 46. Babies with Tripoidy are often lost through miscarriage. Those that survive usually die within the first five months of life. The rare disorder also causes babies to be much smaller than average, and often results in birth defects. Source: WebMD . The woman said that she and her husband are still grieving and experience bouts of 'spontaneous sobbing'. She wonders how Mother's Day, which is on May 10, will feel and how she'll cope on the baby's due date, but she knows that she and her husband made the right decision. 'I don't regret it,' she said. 'My other option was to wait for her to pass naturally, but the risks were too high.' She does, however, wish people would stop telling her that 'the next baby will be just fine'; she explained that though she and her husband do plan to try again, they are still dealing with the loss of this baby. 'I'm facing this head-on and telling people about it no-holds-barred,' she expained, because she knows she is not the only woman to go through this. 'Because it does happen, a lot, and we shouldn't be afraid to talk about it.'
highlights: The Ohio woman revealed on Reddit that her unborn daughter's dangerous condition would have left her unable to live outside the womb .
  Potential complications from the pregnancy put the anonymous mother's life in danger .
  She and her Catholic husband had to get special approval for a doctor at Catholic hospital to perform the procedure .
  Though she is still grieving over the loss of the child she named Gwendolyn Renee, she 'doesn't regret' her decision .
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