Communication is the key that unlocks the door of conflict. Effective communication requires careful and attentive listening to your partner, and vice versa. Many problems arise during communication when you are listening to reply rather than listening to understand. Try these active listening tips:  Eliminate distractions---turn off the TV and put your phones on silent. Turn and face your partner. Lean forward towards the person. Make eye contact. Hear your partner's entire perspective before speaking. Paraphrase what you heard by saying something like "It sounds like you're saying..." Try to empathize by looking for something about your partner's perspective that you agree with. When it's time for you to share your own perspective be sure to speak effectively. A great combination is to use "I" statements in conjunction with "X, Y, Z" statements.  Using an "I" statement allows you to take ownership for your own thoughts/feelings and minimizes your partner's defensiveness. The "X, Y, Z" part helps your partner see specifics. For example, you might say "When you come home(X) and immediately go to bed(Y), I feel very ignored(Z)". The statement can become even more effective when you start with "Z" or the "I" statement: "I feel very ignored when you come home and immediately go to bed". Many times a small issue becomes amplified when one or the other starts bringing up past issues. Always try to focus on the present moment and the problem at hand. When you bring up past issues, your ability to work through them becomes even more difficult. If this happens, one of you can easily point out, "Hey, sweetheart, let's not bring up the past. Let's figure out what can we do about the here and now. Ok?" Another potential roadblock to effective communication occurs when one or the other partner attacks the person rather than the issue. If one of you goes into a long rant about the other's personality traits, defensiveness and anger will probably pop up. Talk about a specific behavior, such as leaving dirty laundry strewn...

TL;DR in Indonesian:
Berlatihlah mendengarkan secara aktif. Gunakan pernyataan “aku”. Selesaikan masalah saat ini. Tunjuklah perilakunya, bukan orangnya. Duduklah bersisian. Gunakan humor.