When you’re in a possessive relationship, your partner is responsible for his actions. Many victims of abuse are trained to think, “It’s my fault,” and “If I’d only done this, he wouldn’t do that.” But your partner is the one who decides how he will act. If the relationship is worth fixing, your boyfriend has to really want to change his ways. He has to initiate the change. If your boyfriend is possessive enough that you’ve become isolated, trapped, depressed, anxious, or fearful, then it’s most likely that you should leave the relationship. Often, a person in a possessive relationship will become isolated from friends and family. She may retreat because she feels that she will be judged or stigmatized. But when you realize that you need to leave the relationship, you will need these support networks. Even if you haven’t talked with a friend or family member in a while, he or she is likely willing to support you. Rally this person’s support. Talk to this person to discuss your strategy for leaving the relationship. The National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-7233 | 1-800-787-3224 (TTY)) is staffed with counselors who can talk you through your options and help you figure out a plan for leaving this relationship. The National Domestic Violence Hotline also has a website (www.thehotline.com) where you can chat with someone online except for 2:00 a.m. to 7:00 a.m. Central Time. The staff will help you determine what your safest course of action is at this time. They also have a list of 4,000 safehouses around the United States. They can help locate one for you and your children if need be. A personalized safety plan is a way to work out exactly what you’ll do when you feel threatened or at risk.  There are personalized safety plans available online, such as this worksheet from the National Center on Domestic and Sexual Violence. Print out this form and fill it out. Store this worksheet in a safe place where your boyfriend can’t find it. If your relationship has become dangerous, you do not need to explain...

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Hãy suy nghĩ một cách thực tế xem liệu mối quan hệ này có đáng hàn gắn không. Nhờ sự giúp đỡ của bạn thân hoặc gia đình. Tìm sự hỗ trợ qua đường dây nóng phòng chống bạo lực gia đình. Lập kế hoạch an toàn cho riêng mình. Rời đi ngay nếu bạn cảm thấy không an toàn. Tin tưởng vào bản năng của bạn.