Underlying all the emotion, thoughts, and hopes about love is our basic biochemistry. We are hard-wired to love! Attraction is based in brain chemistry. A group of neurotransmitters called monoamines (dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin) creates the feeling we experience as attraction.  Dopamine is one of your brain’s “feel-good” chemicals (it’s where the term “dope” comes from). It’s also involved in your brain’s motivation and reward systems. When you meet someone you’re attracted to, dopamine starts sending feel-good chemical “rewards” to your system.  Norepinephrine, sometimes known as noradrenaline (but not the same thing as adrenalin), delivers messages to your central nervous system. Norepinephrine is responsible for your ability to “block out” information that isn’t as interesting as the smart partner in front of you. Serotonin regulates a lot of functions in your body, including sexual behavior and body temperature. When you are very attracted to someone, serotonin decreases your body temperature, which makes your skin slightly more able to conduct electricity. This is the reason that love can literally make your skin tingle.  In fact, experts say that attraction stimulates the same chemicals in the brain that addiction does, such as dopamine and oxytocin. If a girl isn’t attracted to you, it’s nothing to do with you: it’s all down to the chemicals in each person’s brain. A researcher at Rutgers University suggests that it takes less than one second for the brain to decide whether it considers someone to be attractive or not. You may be able to overcome or cope with this split-second first impression, or you may not. If not, don’t take it personally: people are not able to manage spontaneous impulses and what is judged may not have anything to do negatively with you. For instance, some women are drawn to men which are high risk-takers, some are more attracted to those who seem more cautious. There is nothing wrong with being either.   Understanding how attraction works may seem to take some of...

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