The facile real-time monitoring of methyl content in fermented beverages is of fundamental significance in the alcohol and restaurant industry, since as little as 4 mL of methanol entering the blood may cause intoxication or blindness. So far, the practical applicability of available methanol sensors, including the piezoresonance analogs, is somewhat limited to laboratory use due to the complexity and bulkiness of the measuring equipment involving multistep procedures. This article introduces a hydrophobic metal–phenolic film-coated quartz crystal microbalance (MPF-QCM) as a novel streamlined detector of methanol in alcoholic drinks. Unlike other QCM-based alcohol sensors, our device operates under saturated vapor pressure conditions, permitting rapid detection of methyl fractions up to seven times below the tolerable levels in spirits (e.g., whisky) while effectively suppressing the cross-sensitivity to interfering chemical compounds such as water, petroleum ether or ammonium hydroxide. Furthermore, the good surface adhesion of metal–phenolic complexes endows the MPF-QCM with superior long-term stability, contributing to the repeatable and reversible physical sorption of the target analytes. These features, combined with the lack of mass flow controllers, valves and connecting pipes delivering the gas mixture, outline the likelihood for future design of a portable MPF-QCM prototype suitable to point-of-use analysis in drinking establishments.