BackgroundLife-threatening obstetric complications usually lead to the need for referral and constitute the commonest direct causes of maternal deaths. Urgent management of referrals can potentially lower the maternal mortality rate. We explored the experiences of women referred with obstetric emergencies to Mbarara Regional Referral Hospital (MRRH) in Uganda, in order to identify barriers and facilitating factors.MethodsThis was an exploratory qualitative study. In-depth interviews (IDIs) were conducted with 10 postnatal women and 2 attendants as key informants. We explored health system and client related factors to understand how these could have facilitated or hindered the referral process. Data was analyzed deductively employing the constructs of the Andersen Healthcare Utilization model.ResultsWomen experienced transport, care delays and inhumane treatment from health care providers (HCPs). The obstetric indications for referral were severe obstructed labor, ruptured uterus, and transverse lie in advanced labor, eclampsia and retained second twin with intrapartum hemorrhage. The secondary reasons for referral included; non-functional operating theatres due to power outages, unsterilized caesarian section instruments, no blood transfusion services, stock outs of emergency drugs, and absenteeism of HCPs to perform surgery. Four (4) themes emerged; enablers, barriers to referral, poor quality of care and poor health facility organization. Most referring health facilities were within a 30–50 km radius from MRRH. Delays to receive emergency obstetric care (EMOC) led to acquisition of in-hospital complications and eventual prolonged hospitalization. Enablers to referral were social support, financial preparation for birth and birth companion’s knowledge of danger signs.ConclusionThe experience of obstetric referral for women was largely unpleasant due to delays and poor quality of care which contributed to perinatal mortality and maternal morbidities. Training HCPs in respectful maternity care (RMC) may improve quality of care and foster positive postnatal client experiences. Refresher sessions on obstetric referral procedures for HCPs are suggested. Interventions to improve the functionality of the obstetric referral pathway for rural south-western Uganda should be explored.Supplementary InformationThe online version contains supplementary material available at 10.1186/s12884-023-05795-z.