So I Know What's Happening

Story Structure 101, with Adam's Mom.
Normal thought. Normal thought. Huh?

June 17, 1996
It was a delight seeing you and Vicky. Let me know when your travel plans materialize so I know what's happening.
Is your car insured for other people to drive? Posted by don't eat sushi at 9:55 PM 0 comments Labels: Nothing to say but..., Paranoia will destroy ya, Warnings-Personal

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Don't Be Anxious

What? NOW I'm anxious.

Don't be upset, because when you're upset or in a hurry,
you trip, you fall and you break your leg.
You can't afford any more of that! Something good is going to happen soon. My horoscope says so. Just take care of yourself, and don't be anxious.
Because then, you make things worse than it is.
Have a little faith. Posted by don't eat sushi at 9:26 PM 0 comments Labels: Advice, To your health

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Stay Away

Nanny are you ok? So Nanny are you ok? Are you Ok, Nanny?

Don't go near Nan until we find out from the doctor why she has a rash all over her body and face! I don't know if it's contagious. So stay away. Posted by don't eat sushi at 7:39 AM 4 comments Labels: Big News, Don't Trust Anyone in our Family, I will protect you, Maybe it's me, Paranoia will destroy ya, She may be right, Warnings-Personal

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Capricorn Man

First the horoscope arrived.
Then about a week or so later, came the letter.
By the way, I am a Capricorn Man. My wife, is a Gemini.
Welcome to La Vida Loca.
And Happy Mother's Day, Everybody!

1. I had NO idea that was on the horoscope. I didn't even remember what Maria's birthday was. (I only read the CUTE saying they had.)
2. If you want me to be the "Bad" guy in this for something "harmless", then so be it. I can't control what people think! If I bothered to look at that part of the clipping, I may have thought twice. But, it was so unimportant to me, I never even looked! Maria should know in her heart how very much I care for her!
3. If you still have the cold after the antibiotics stop, you should have the doctor renew them 'cause I had to renew mine when I had the flu. You have to stay on 1 week longer. It's so cold up here now, I had to put on my heavy "down" coat 'cause I don't want to get sick again.
Take care- Posted by don't eat sushi at 7:08 AM 3 comments Labels: Attachments, Just plain weird, Manipulation 101, The definition of embarrassment, Warnings-Personal

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Captain O'Reilly

This is more about a phone call than the subsequent fax.
So please bear with me.
Only the names have been changed to protect the ambushed.
My mother was coming back to California from New York the other day. There were strong winds in the area, so the plane couldn't take off on time and was going to be delayed by three hours. While waiting at her gate, she called to let me know that I shouldn't worry about picking her up. They wouldn't be landing until after midnight. "That's fine", I said. "Thanks for letting me..."
"Hang on a second...", my mother interrupted. "Captain? Captain?...
Adam, listen, the pilot of the plane wants to talk to you for a second. Here. This is my son, Adam."

Captain O'Reilly: Hello?
Adam: Hello?
Captain O'Reilly: Hi, this is Captain O'Reilly. I'm here with your mom. (Pause.)
Adam: Is this really the Captain of the plane?
Captain O'Reilly: Yes. Your mom wanted me to tell you that we're going to be delayed about three hours due to the strong winds we're having here. She just didn't want you to worry.
Adam: I...can't believe she got you on the phone to tell me that.
Captain O'Reilly: No problem. Have a great day.
Adam: Thanks.
Captain O'Reilly: Here's your mom again.
Adam's Mom: Hello?
Adam: (Dialtone.)

Upon her return, she handed me the following note to fax to the airline.
How does a guy like me keep his mojo?

Please send to Human Resource Department
Re: Captain O'Reilly
Dear Sir:
I took a flight from >>>>> to California. We were booked to leave at 6PM Eastern Time. There was a delay and we didn't leave until 9PM. I was so impressed by the Pilot-Captain O'Reilly that I had to write this letter.
I was in a wheelchair and he was so considerate and caring for my welfare that I felt completely safe and secure about the flight (late or not).
He even took the time to call my son in Burbank on my cell phone to let him know of the delay and not to worry.
Because of his concern for all the passengers, he is one of the few pilots I have seen that has the empathy and respect that others do not have.
Therefore, I believe he deserves some kind of recognition.
Thank you. It was my pleasure. Posted by don't eat sushi at 10:51 PM 4 comments Labels: Maybe it's me, The definition of embarrassment don't eat sushi
Ah...my mother. Ever since I moved from Florida to California for college, I've been receiving letters from her about two times per week. Some I tore up. But most of them, I kept in a large container I hid in the corner of my garage. Now, I'm claiming my place as the official curator for this still-growing, ever-evolving collection of her advice, warnings, fears and curious discoveries. If you can relate, send me an email at email@example.com.
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