stop! in the name of the law! dear officer h.,
thank you for being so kind when you pulled me over this afternoon. you see, it was my first time being pulled over. ever. so i was a little shaky and nervous. but you were so nice--so nice, in fact, that after you handed me the ticket, i said thank you.
also, thank you for choosing to pull me over on a day when i was only going 13 over.
and since i could tell you felt a little bad about giving me a ticket, i should tell you this: i've chosen to look at the $155 i will be paying for those 13 mph as follows: if i divide that by all of the other times when i probably should have been pulled over in the last year, it only comes out to about 0.42 cents per incident. that's probably less than the average american spends on lottery tickets everyday. guess we all have our addictions.
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