If DJT does not get the Nobel prize for Peace, perhaps he can get it for a mash up of Bob Dylan’s song “If Not For You”. Remember that one? I think Olivia Newton John covered it later on. Never mind copyright infringement or plagiarism. He’s been playing the Rolling Stones’ “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” despite their protests for the last two years plus. Keith Richards in particular would like to B Slap him for many infractions. You can bet the Donald will never be within 300 yards of Keith without becoming instantly incontinent. Sort of like facing Robert Mueller at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. For reasons we have yet to learn, Don gains intestinal fortitude around Kimba, Putin, Duterte, and other dictator toughs. Delta Dog Don feels safe when the dark side alphas wag their tails in his face and let him sniff their butts. “You are one of us, Don.” He-he-he…. “until we barbecue you on the spit of your own grandiose delusions.” Dylan had the audacity to focus on someone else, which we now know is totally wrong in our post modern, narcissistic sociopathic era. Dylan didn’t put America first and make america great again like Donald is doing with all the winning he’s been up to. I mean, we are all projectile vomiting from his excess winning. It could be food poisoning. Hmmm, what did all of us eat recently? Yes, the rainbow stew.  He is truly a gift like ipecac syrup, steroid infused prune juice, or electro shock therapy. Convulsively wonderful. Biological geysers erupt spontaneously. The Chaotic beauty of a rabid squirrel running through L.A. rush hour traffic. Anyway, thinking of yet another of his village idiot claims, I wondered how it might play with the rest of Dylan’s lyrics. The Donald whips up solutions for which problems never existed, and then rides in to fix them as only he, the Strong Man, can. Reminds me of the evil priest in Angels and Demons who creates a false threat in order to take over the Papacy and mimic Jesus rising from the dead after saving the Vatican from the bomb he constructed, but he flies away from the populace in a fake act of self sacrifice, only to return three days later. Like Stalin, Mussolini, Duterte, Putin, Kim Young Fool, Erdogan, Hussein, Assad, Castro, you get the picture. Quite a frightening fraternity: Mega Lo Maniacs. Imagine their Rush Week. “Uh, I wanna join the frat house, you know, get babes and be politically incorrect in the comfort of my own silo with like minded sociopaths.”

“Okay, Donnie. You have to bankrupt ten innocent people in your real estate game. Then plunder a shit hole country. Run a scam university. Break up two faithful couples. And then pass a lie detector test at the end.”

“Oh man! This is gonna be fun!” All have the gift of hypnotic lying. Like criminal advertising, “This beer will make bikini clad super models adore you. This beer will make bikini clad supermodels adore you. This beer will…” repeat the lie until it is the new Gospel. Hit it Don…

If not for me,

we’d have a Korean nuclear war

Be overrun by rapist poor,

Have Obamacare and even more

If not for me. The night would see our allies sigh

The Russians would have to say good bye

Porn stars would not be in view, Wild eyed Muslims would call

MS Thirteen too

Without me you’d be nowhere at all

You’d be lost if not for me. Canada would invade in spring

Trade deficits would be crippling

You just wouldn’t have a clue, Decency would have a place

Our country wouldn’t be disgraced

We could practice diplomacy Women could breathe easier

Politics would not be sleazier

Crowd size could be ignored You wouldn’t need a knife in each back

Or lie and lie to counter attack

The village would get its idiot back King of hypocrisy

White trash aristocracy

Killer of democracy

yep, it’s just me.

All the chaos that you see, After his faithful clap themselves silly and cry for an encore, Don will pass the hat for his legal defense fund because his taxes are under audit and cannot be revealed at this time. Because he cannot be bought, being a really rich guy and all, he will make that gorilla smile/shoulder shrug shimmy move of his with both palms up, as if to say, “You guys really love me” and then authorize a second offering be taken for his reelection campaign because he knows that it would be rude to stop sucking the last cent out of the zombie crowd who can’t distinguish chicken salad from chicken shit.

Where to honor him, oh where?  Earlier I speculated that he needed the Pentagon to house his ego, but that is too far from the heart of D.C. It’s shabby and undeserving of  his brand. Mt. Rushmore is crowded with losers that beat him there simply because they died first. Hmmm, where or where can Donnie go? Oh where can he get his due? Let’s see… In the Greek myth of Sysyphus, this arrogant petty trickster king was condemned to push a boulder up a hill for eternity. Once he managed to reach the summit, the boulder rolled down the other side. If he didn’t exert himself, the boulder rolled over him or else the birds of Hell would peck at him. Sisyphus was the founder and first king of Ephyra (supposedly the original name of Corinth). King Sisyphus promoted navigation and commerce but was avaricious and deceitful. He also killed travellers and guests, a violation of xenia, which fell under Zeus‘s domain. He took pleasure in these killings because they allowed him to maintain his iron-fisted rule.
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