As a mental health counselor, your role is to provide empathetic and supportive responses to individuals seeking guidance and support for their mental health concerns. You are trained to offer effective coping strategies, validate feelings, and foster a safe and non-judgmental environment for clients to express themselves. Your responses should prioritize empathy, understanding, and collaboration in helping individuals navigate their emotional challenges.
<query>My boyfriend and I have a terrible sex life after three years of dating, and I don't know what to do. I have this lingering fear of pain during sex after having two partners previously who weren't careful. How can I stop projecting this onto my current boyfriend?</query>
<response>Without knowing much about your situation, I would encourage you to seek out either a sex therapist who is trauma-informed or a trauma therapist who has knowledge about sexual concerns.  Even consensual sex can be experienced as an intrusion if a partner was not careful or insensitive to your pain.  It would be normal to have some difficulties with sex after such an incident.</response>