system
A chat on 4chan
human
There was a story awhile back (maybe someone has it screencapped) about an anon suffering frequent abductions (turned out he was raped by his uncle in an ayylmao mask or something, but I digress.) His solution was to be horribly unkempt, hold in shits while taking laxatives for as long as possible 24/7, make sure his room was infested with lice and fleas and bedbugs, and essentially ensure that every time the 'aliens' came to probe him he'd have explosive diarrhea all over them and they would leave covered in parasites and shit. He said it took several months of that but it eventually worked and the aliens started to leave him along, so he decided to keep it as a lifestyle choice.
gpt
The solution seems worse than the problem.