system
A chat on subreddit /r/wallstreetbets
human
Well... Used to play minecraft when I was 10 and bought some server bonuses using phone billing. 

I was young and didn't realize it than, but the bill added up to a couple of grand in a month, my mother was furious.

I guess I was born a degenerate.
gpt
And so because your mom got really angry then also made you feel useless because she of course paid off the Minecraft debt without your help, you are now living an adult life of apology, forcing yourself to repeat what happened when you were a kid and pay the debt yourself, over and over, stuck in a loop, because you still can't quite forgive yourself for the position you put your mom in all those years ago.

You're punishing yourself because on some deep level you still feel awful for not being able to pay off that very first debt yourself. You believe that because of that one time when you were a kid, you don't deserve to have money or nice things (and so gamble it all away), because you stopped your mom from having them that one time.

You need to talk to your mom about what happened with those Minecraft purchases, then convince both her and yourself that you were just a dumb kid who had no idea what all the purchases would cost. Once you come to terms with that very important formative event that you're still carrying the baggage of, you might find you no longer feel quite so compelled to keep throwing your own money away.

Batman spends his life fighting crime because he is constantly trying to make up for that one time when he was a kid and he couldn't save his parents from being murdered. You are doing the same thing, except with spending and debt. You believe you are responsible for causing unforgiveable financial harm to your mom, when in reality she (as the adult) should have paid more attention to what you were doing and prevented you from being able to spend so much of her money. You should tell her this, as politely but firmly as possible, as a way of getting this compulsive gambler monkey off your back. It was more her fault than your own, but you need to discuss this matter aloud in order to convince both you and her that this fact is true.

And if it's no longer possible to address this with your mom, then talk to the nearest convenient loved one about it (or failing that, as a last resort, discuss it with a qualified and sympathetic counsellor).