September 20, 2011


I've been having some whacked out dreams lately. I dreamed I was in nursing school. You will never catch me in nursing school, mkay? I don't do sick people. I went to EMT school, went on my first run on the ambulance, came back to the station and quit. I don't do sick people. It's probably worth noting that my mother is an RN and my sister is in nursing school. Rebellion, perhaps?

We've been discussing trading my Jeep in on something with better than 10 miles per gallon gas mileage since I'm running Aidan & Asher's Personal Bitch Taxi Service. I dreamed I was driving a horse and buggy, wearing an Amish bonnet. I didn't even tell the Beast about that one, he'll think that's a GREAT idea.

I say "we" but really it's just me talking and the Beast shaking his head slowly but "we've" also been talking about moving into a less expensive house. Problem is I want  an old craftsman style with a huge front porch and most of those are in neighborhoods I don't want to live in and in a different school district. Although, Duh, if I'm driving a smaller car and therefore saving gas money and we're living in a cheaper home, then it stands to reason that we could afford for me to drive the boys to their schools in the district we're in now. Still I get the slowly shaking head. Which is probably why I dreamed that we moved into an RV behind Aidan's school. And I was thrilled because we didn't have to move the swing-set since there is a playground at the school.

Somehow I tricked the people at the shelter into thinking I am capable of creating a calendar to sell to raise money for the shelter. I'm terrified I'm going to screw it up royally. I guess that fear is what led me to dream that when the calendars came in, instead of photos of adopted dogs for each month there were photo copies of my ass. You know, like when you sit bare-assed on the copy machine? Don't pretend you never did it.

I've also dreamed that Asher ripped my nose ring out and insurance wouldn't pay to repair the tear in my nostril. I was super-pissed when I woke from that one. I dreamed that Aidan filled out a fund-raiser order form for 200 items so he could get the big prize - an iPod Touch - and we were going to have to pay for it. I was amused upon waking from that one because if he sells 200 items he's getting the iPad. For me. I dreamed my veneers fell off. I dreamed I sewed my fingers together. On purpose. And I dreamed something hysterically funny about the Beast but he's dead serious when he says he will divorce me if I ever repeat it. Maybe he won't get an invite when I go private and I'll tell y'all then *wink*. Kidding, honey, you know I would never...


Kritta22 said...

Are these like in one week?

I have crazy dreams when I'm prego. I'm just saying.

Crystal Renee said...

Lmbo! My dreams are a little crazy as well.

Anonymous said...

Girl, you've got some seriously crazy dreams! They almost sound like they could be real! That's how mine turn out sometimes and it takes me longer than it should to realize that they were, in fact, dreams and not real life.

I've never dreamed about it, but ever since I got my nose pierced 5 years ago, I'm terrified of it getting ripped out. OUCH.

Ordie O. said...

Yikes! Those are even better than when I dreamed I was naked and pushing Ruth Gray around in a wheelbarrow!