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i was quiet but i was not blind

This is one of many quotes that resonates with me.  I have been an observer all of my life and much of it has been of people.  As I have gotten older and lived through more experiences, I have been able to filter even more of those things that I have seen.  As an empathetic person, there have been people who have hurt, used (or misused), and abused my nature.  Wanting to believe the best of people can blind us to some and their true natures.  Since I could never imagine behaving that way, or treating another person in such a manner, it was shocking to me in the realization.

It has also become aware that people are not aware of the many aspects of their behavior that show over and over their nature and character beyond their words.  For example, someone who complains about the attention that they get and then does everything short of wearing spinning lights to get attention.  The words and actions do not correlate.

Another thing that has become clearer to me, over the years, is observing facial and body cues, and being able to understand without hearing the words how someone feels and how the communication is going.

That silence is a comfort for some who need some understanding and compassion without having to find the words, or speak about it before they are ready, to describe the hurt or loss that they have experienced.  At times, helping someone along by sharing that pain silently gives them strength and comfort.  If so, I am grateful to be able to provide such.

Being observant and empathic is a lot of stimulus.  Indeed, perhaps, life would be easier if I could turn away or not pay so much attention.  The aspects of my brain and personality just won’t do it.  I come from a long line of observers of human nature and whether through nature, or nurturing it over many years, this is who I am.  For those who seek it out, it is a compassion that they are grateful for.  To those who are interviewing, they have come to trust my opinion and confirmed what I have seen.

But, like many observers, seeing so much needs to be kept quiet, for the truth can be overwhelming for others who are not ready to see or have chosen to look away.





upon reflection_sea and sky

In a world of misunderstandings, have we improved our relationship this year? or, did we merely act as a prelude to goodbye?  It is so hard to know what is right and wrong moving forward as we carry along the subjective judgment of the past.


My hope is that your anger is diminished, your sorrow is lightened, your peace is restored, your dreams come true, and that the world can reflect the light that shines deeply within you.

reflection_miniature world liquid



Thank you for stopping by.  What will you reflect upon this year?

I hope that you enjoy your visit.


pause quote


Why do people rush to condemn, but pause rather than speak up?

Why do people run with gossip, but remain silent, when a compliment could be given?

Why do some people pause when they have a chance to help and defend?

A pause to judgment is fine if you use the break to reflect and consider all sides.  A pause in speaking that allows you to listen, and empathize with another, is a gift.  Pausing to satisfy your own needs, while sharing with someone else, feeds the body and soul of another.

I have consciously worked to pause my speaking, told myself to hold back, rather than to respond in anger in the moment.  Yet, that pause was perceived as validation to someone else’s lie.

How do we stay strong in a moment of quiet against a bully whose bluster seeks to blow us down?  How do we create a space to begin or maintain healing when we pause in fear and doubt?

A pause is an opportunity to reflect and reconsider.  But, how do we make it meaningful?

What can I accomplish as I pause in my day?  How can I improve myself when I remove the distractions and detractors?

There can be joy and gratitude in pausing to reflect and look around us.  We pause to remember.  But, how do I strengthen myself in my pauses to fill those empty spaces?

pause to write


These are some of the questions that give me pause…  how deeply I struggle for understanding and peace.



Thank you for stopping by.   How do you use your pauses to refresh?

banff natl park

Perhaps the most important thing we bring to another person is
the silence in us
not the sort of silence that is filled with unspoken
criticism or hard withdrawal.
The sort of silence that is a place of refuge,
of rest, of acceptance of someone as they are.
We are all hungry for this other silence.
the moment, a strength on which to build a life.
Silence is a place of great
power and healing.

——-     Rachel Naomi Remen


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