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A stutterer finding a voice

I’m a writer, but not a notepad writer. It probably seems like a strange quirk, but I took most comfortably to the keyboard. What helped me take strongly to an artificial communication method? Since about age four, or farther back than I can remember, I haven’t been able to talk without a stutter, so that’s how deep it goes. I have a better time sharing my feelings using an electronic product than using my voice, unless you can get me to be really calm in quiet company. Also, my handwriting never got that smooth.

I came into writing for the uninterrupted expression of what’s going on in my oft-dissociating mind. If I try to speak it to you, it’s rarely a matter of not knowing what I want to say, and almost always a matter of being physically blocked from saying it. There’s a certain sanctuary here, a relief. That relief is found in the process of writing, but not often the written product.

Mind you, writing has its challenges. They’re just refreshingly different. I can honestly feel like with self-awareness, reflection, and effort, those challenges might be mitigated or overcome. When you know what it’s like to have a disruption in your life that’s always there, and might be made worse by self-awareness, reflection, and misdirected effort, you might learn to better appreciate those pursuits where effort pays off.

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1 Comment

  1. Grant H.

    All so true. I identify with you especially where you said that writing is like a sanctuary. It is where I pour myself into without being or feeling inhibited or insecure which is definitely a more difficult thing to do in real life. Thank you for posting! ~ Grant ☺️

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