6 Days to New HOLE!

I love Jodie Foster, and I have to admit that I was nonplussed to discover that she had made a movie with Mel Gibson. It did not seem like a natural pairing. Adorable, lesbian, professional and batshit racist drunk. You can see my confusion.

Then I saw the trailer, and it all became clear.

(Added after the fact.)

I can see where I was misleading. The recordings are of Mel ranting at his wife after they separated, and are taken from her answering machine which she used to tape his calls. Everything that the puppet says in the trailer is what Mel actually said to his wife in reality. The trailer itself is also real, but is unconnected to the phone calls.

21 Responses to 6 Days to New HOLE!

  1. Um—ye-e-e-ah. I think I’ll give that one a pass.

    Of course, I give almost all movies a pass these days, so that isn’t saying much. 😛

    • To give them credit, it IS doing something new and different. Just to throw in terrible, crass language for no other reason (from what I can tell) but it’s still shaking up the formula a bit.

      I’m sure he’ll get everything solved in the end and it’ll be all ok and he’ll be a well-adjusted family superman again soon enough, though. Hollywood hacks.

      • My bad. The crass language and the movie trailer are cut together by someone having a laugh at Mel’s expense. Mel’s phone calls to his real life wife are not part of the movie.

  2. Wait, Mel is holding a beaver puppet that spews out audio recordings of his drunken self? 😕

    I didn’t even know until I checked on Wiki’, after Kevin’s helpful tip, that she’s a suspected lesbian. But then I don’t follow celebrities’ lives.
    I’m not sure if Mel’s views have anything against her, he hasn’t bashed lesbians yet, has he? Only hidden homosexual bigots(like most especially loud and hateful clergy members) hate lesbians- all the heterosexual men, homophobic as they might be, find them way too hot to protest against. 😛

      • So wait, Mel is *still* holding a beaver puppet that spews out audio recordings of his drunken self? 😕

        I didn’t even watch it through, stopped after some rant about “niggers” came out of the “beaver”. Your added comment does explain why the sound was a bit mechanical and “unfocused” during those moments.

  3. at first i was thinking the puppet was voiced by tourettes guy. once I recognized what he was saying though i realized it was mel. fairly amusing splice work. don’t think I’ll bother with the actual movie though.

  4. i got the most awesome shirt from my oldest daughter for christmas. it says ” Where be Sea….There be Pirates…. Where be Pirates…There be a Party! i know im a day late but i blame lots of holiday partying…..happy new year yall

  5. While we’re at the subject of entertainment, I’ve decided to watch The Walking Dead today *some spoiler references ahead*.
    It was quite fun, hilarious at some points(tough gang guarding the elderly 😆 ) and quite bloody(I was eating while the horse’s “entrails” were being plucked out, mmm…), so all in all it was very entertaining.
    But underneath it all I still resent the whole illogical premise of a “successful” zombie apocalypse, and it kept nagging at me while I watched. Seriously, how could troops inside tanks be defeated by a bunch of unarmed shuffling meat-bags?

    • Run out of ammo and die of dehydration and starvation? Once one of em dies and becomes a zombie IN the tank, problem solved!

      • Sure. I’m also sure they ran out of ammo(though they didn’t appear to have shot anything with cannons, and there are lots of rounds left on the small machine-guns on the outside), fuel, food and water all while parked in the middle of the city.
        The tanks are just parked there. Those things rolled into the city on their own, and you can bet they had plenty of fuel left, there’s no reason for anyone to stay put if they felt surrounded. And there’s still the fact that there’s no reason for any of them to have been bitten and infected in the first place. What did they do, go outside to dance on the roof?
        A zombie outbreak may work in an ancient setting, but once you introduce masses of guns with plenty of ammunition, vehicles and armed people who’ve been trained to use all of the above, they just don’t stand a chance.
        Hell, the zombies are worse off than WWI troops slowly advancing towards the enemy trench, and I think we know how well that strategy went. Maybe if they had agile, fast “zombies” like in the Fallout series, but not those pathetic shuffling things.
        That’s the underlying problem that keeps me from thoroughly enjoying a zombie-related work, even one as entertaining as this series.
        Poor horse, really should have stayed in the enclosure. 😈

        • Yeah, I thought the abandoned tank was a bit odd as well. The only thing that would make sense about the tank being there was that it was out of fuel or had some mechanical issue that prevented it and its crew from leaving.
          Good point too, about how the zombies got the crew. Stupidity is the obvious answer – at some point they decided to open the top *and* bottom hatches?

          “Sarge! Our tank is surrounded by brainless meatsacks armed with nothing but their teeth and filthy fingernails! What do we do?”

          Run the fuckers over with the god-damned TANK! That’s what you do!

          • Tanks, actually. One in the city and at least another one or two at the CDC. Anyway, my point is that it’s a great show, good acting etc, but the basic premise of all such zombie works is just illogical. Guns are just THAT fucking big a deal, and you can’t say there’s a lack of them in the USA, thanks to the good folks of the NRA(when the zombie apocalypse does come you’ll be thanking them and you know it!). Modern weapons are truly terrifying.

            • You’re correct, of course. But, I was just talking about the one in the first episode. All points made are still valid.

              • Yea, I just wanted to show it’s not an isolated case. I mean, surely tanks stationed at a high priority military center(CDC) would’ve been given enough fuel to last them more than a little trip around the perimeter. Wiki’ lists the M1 Abrams’ range at 289 miles.
                I once had the doubtful pleasure of fueling a Merkava tank(I don’t know why they had to keep the engine running, the noise was really annoying) and it just gulped a shitload of diesel from the tanker and it was mostly full when we started. Tanks have huge fuel capacities for a reason.
                Because they blow up more prettily that way. 😛

                Speaking of blowing stuff up, the 1st season ending included a big explosion, and I didn’t want to nitpick that part because it wasn’t my original point and I can mostly ignore such things, but they didn’t even bother to have the cars’ windows blow up when they were right next to it, no matter that such an explosion would’ve hurled away the cars themselves, or the multitude of debris would’ve smashed everyone to a pulp, shock-wave liquefying people etc. It’s just, you know, a minor point, except that it was the “big exciting exploding ending” of season 1.

    • I have no idea how a group of guys with modern weapons in a tank no less could be taken out by zombies aside from stupidity on the behalf of their commander. But as for how any kind of zombie apocalypse could occur would be only if everyone who died, no matter how, became a zombie. If it was a virus or some such I think it would be pretty easily contained. But if suddenly everyone who had died within the last week started getting up and attacking people, and every person they bit became ill and died, then rose up and started biting people, I could see where it would escalate quickly. Keep in mind, you have to destroy the brain to kill the buggers, so blowing them up with rockets is only gonna make lots of zombies crawling around with no legs or getting back up with jellied internals and broken bones and big ass holes in them. But if the brain is intact then they’re still alive. Ish. Plus you have to factor in the fact that no one would believe it was happening until they were watching their neighbor getting bit in the face. And the panic that would ensue, cause when fresh dead they look just like everyone else, would have neighbors killing neighbors, and whole cities (think about third world countries where everyone has an assault rifle, and america where everyone has a handgun or shotgun) killing each other just trying to make sure they aren’t the next to get eaten. And then the panic when people start to think that they’ll have to hole up for a while and start looting, and the killing that would occur then. And every person that gets killed would get back up as a zombie.

      Of course for any of this to happen hell would have to be full, or some virus in the air that “everyone” has been exposed to or some other completely far fetched thing. But hey, it never hurts to be prepared, so always know where your exits are, where there’s a skull shattering/sheering object close by, and who you’re willing to trip to get away safely.

      • I sleep with a hand-axe propped near my bed, in reach of my hand, but that’s because I’m a paranoid nutjob and have been itching to use it on something other than an old, half-broken chair ever since I moved to this apartment two years ago and found it here. So far no night-time burglars have volunteered to be my test-subjects. 🙁

        People seem to forget that explosives do more than neatly tear up your body into pieces. You want brain-trauma? How about a shock-wave turning your brain to goo or shattering your skull and your brain leaving the ruins in pieces? And a mostly ripped apart zombie is even more pathetic than a whole one, as was the case with the half-eaten one crawling piteously in the first episode.
        There’d be panic, sure, but the whole concept of it, as long as their the classic shuffling idiots, just falls apart in the modern world.

        • My granddad always told me that the best way to ensure that an intruder uses a particular weapon ON you, is to keep it by your bed…

          Just as to the tanks… the TV series does touch on this, though it gets explained a little more in detail in other places such as the comic, but the biggest problem that the military (mostly National Guard) faced was not zombies, but desertion. The logic went like this: It is one thing to fly around the world to go to war in another nation when you know your wife and kids are snug and cozy in their beds, but it is entirely a different prospect to keep morale when fighting against deceased countrymen while knowing that your family… just a few hours drive away… is in deadly peril. This is born out by the fact that the soldiers we see inside the tank appear to have been gunned down, perhaps by a tank commander trying to keep his men from going AWOL. Further, in the world of The Walking Dead, while the bite of a zombie is highly toxic and will kill you, you will turn into a zombie after dying from ANY means that does not also destroy your brain. Every one of those represents a new outbreak, and deaths are common even in an inactive and well trained army.

          And just as an aside, the author has stated as well that the “thing”, whatever that may be, that causes corpses to rise also greatly retards decomposition… which shoots my initial tactic of simply waiting underground for a month right in the ass. Now I have to move somewhere frozen.

          Only eskimos are truly safe from zombies.

          • Your granddad was right, if you let said intruder get to said weapon before you did. And do you still seriously believe my claims regarding that axe near the bed? You should know by now that I’m not that crazy.
            I way crazier! Potential burglars are just the excuse. 😉
            Lets just say I have a literal axe to grind.

            There’s a valid point there about desertion, but those who were shown fighting still showed an overall effectiveness akin to that of Imperial Stormtroopers.