Friday, November 07, 2008

Scary thoughts

Here's the truth. My last weekend wasn't great not because I was ill (but that didn't help) or because we didn't have any trick-or-treaters (which we didn't) but because I thought I was pregnant.

And I freaked out. I cried. I hyperventilated. I cried some more. In my head I scared myself silly with the idea of what it would be like for me, if I did end up with 3 children. Three children all under 4 years old and thinking about it made me depressed and scared and angry and sad. And not once was I feeling any positive emotions on the subject.

And it turns out that even though I was 10 days overdue, I am not pregnant. And I can breathe a sigh of relief. But it's opened my eyes to the things that I value and what I want and what I need to work towards (not least of which is more reliable birth control!).

So here's to having a lifeplan and a list of goals and a happy and complete family!


  1. ahh I had a scare beginning of the year too, i was about the same length of lateness, and like you I already have 2 children at preschool age - the thought of another tore me apart.

    Glad it was just a scare, lots of luck with finding a new birth control :) xx

  2. Glad it was just a scare! Those are never fun. I on the other hand am hoping for a pregnancy "scare" soon!

  3. And now you know how you really feel!

    I am absolutely paranoid about birth control. While I might one day want a third, I DEFINITELY don't want a third NOW.

  4. I'm sorry that you had a similar scare Emmie! It's not a nice feeling at all!

    Good luck Becca, I think you'll make an excellent mother!

    I completely agree Lisa! It was an eye opening experience.

