How Fast Can A Bear Climb A Tree? (SPOILER: Very)

April 24, 2019

This is a short video of a bear speeding up a tree like it just had an accident and the last roll of Charmin is in the tippy-top branches. And it comes down almost just as fast! So, if you were wondering how quickly a bear can climb a tree, the answer is much, much faster than you ever could. I'd encourage you to remember that the next time you're considering doing a little B and E and subsequent porridge theft.

Keep going for the whole video.

Thanks to Ricky D, who's still convinced he can outswim one, but I have my doubts.

  • Sayahh

    Poor bear must've been so scared!

  • davegrille

    The moral of the story is don't climb a tree to escape a bear.


    Quite agile. Claws help.

  • Douchy McDouche

    And people are terrified of spiders for some reason.

  • Ollie Williams

    Hey! Bear fucker! Do you need assistance?!

  • Eric Ord

    This one should have been a reply to mine! :'(

  • Octo

    That's not climbing, that's running vertically.

  • Ken

    That a big squirrel

  • Wooder

    Only black bears climb trees...NOT Grizzly's or Polar bears or Teddy Ruxpin or Paddington bear.

  • Konstantin

    You _might_ be safe on a tree from a polar bear. Trouble is, where polar bears are likely to attack, trees are rather scarce, and these facts are probably related. Otherwise, assume that if a bear is a danger to you on the ground, it will be just as much danger if you get onto a tree. There are strategies that will help you reduce chances of getting mauled by a bear. Running away and climbing trees are decidedly not on the list. Playing dead will typically be safer than either of these two. And that one's far from ideal in itself.

  • Ken

    Tell that to this guy

  • sizzlepants


    Bears are fucking terrifying.

    Can't outrun them. Can't out climb them. Best bet if you run into one and don't have a gun is to do what basically every cop screams during an arrest. On the ground. Face down. Hands on your head.

    And then play dead until the bear decides you're not worth the hassle.

    Try not to scream when you get scratched open too.

  • GeneralDisorder

    That's a black bear. It's like a scared puppy. You don't need to be afraid of it so long as it doesn't have rabies or something.

  • Tigerh8r

    My wife lived at the beach as a teenager and had an encounter that left her terrified of sharks. I am afraid of , have a healthy respect for bears. We live half way between the beach and the mountains, and every vacation is a debate. I usually win with, "The shark can't get me unless I go into the water, but if the bear wants me he will come into the cabin and get me."

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