Monday, October 2

What I Wore // Let your hair down

watch: c/o Daniel Wellington
rings: fred meyer
neck scarf: target
denim jacket: charlotte rouss
t-shirt: c/o bohme (out of stock:/)
belt: downeast
jeans: asos
boots: roxy brand from ross

     Hey again friends! At least now I can tell you that I've been kinda MIA due to some pretty crummy morning/all-day-long sickness, but this little peanut(or should I say eggplant?) has calmed down more today, so I have high hopes for the next little while.haha I'd almost forgotten just how much this baby growing business can really knock the wind out of you, but it's still been such an incredible experience so far. This little one is already so loved and anxiously awaited, and a 24/7 flu is a really small price to pay for such a huge blessing and privilege:) I've been feeling its tiny kicks and jabs for a few weeks now, and every time I still have to pause and grin like a goof.

     Right now I'm sitting next to Evie in some reclining chairs in the yard watching Richard and the four older kids playing on the trampoline. Their chorus of giggles is such great background to my typing, and looking over to see all their hair standing up on end with the static makes me smile and shake my head. It's just chilly enough today that I wrapped myself in a cozy sweater, and Luna the cat is napping at my feet now keeping them warm.

     The weather here really has been either nice and chilly or really warm and we haven't really seen any trees changing yet, so these next few weeks are going to bring lots of rich color to our beautiful city. I can't wait! I do feel incredibly zapped of all energy and stamina as a norm now, but I also have this incredible desire to cook (and eat for that matter) all. the. time.haha I've made a bunch of yummy soups in huge quantities, far too many side-dishes to name, apple cider, pie, smoothies, peach cobbler, eggnog, fudge, chicken salads galore, scones, brownies, and so many batches of fluffy rolls that I mostly hoard for myself(baby loves them). The kitchen just seems to be my happy place even more than it usually is, and my family isn't complaining either:) I think it stemmed from trying to find things that would stay down, but now I'm just having fun.haha

    While resizing these photos that my good friend Marley took on a walk together, I couldn't remember why I decided to let my hair down in the middle of taking them. Sometimes I do something with my hair and don't really feel it for some reason, or there's there's something uncomfortable about it. Either way, I realized that it was kind of perfect for my biggest goal for October, and that's to really try and let my mind relax more and to 'let my hair down' so to speak. I've trained my mind over time to try and do so so much at once (we all know how that feels), and a side-effect of feeling like I can keep tabs on everything and keep accomplishing my goals has also been becoming a drastic overthinker. I saw that changing in me much more in the years that followed my late-husband Martin's cancer diagnosis, when all hell broke loose and I had to really snap into action and control mode, but as our life has moved towards more predictable schedules and 'normal' routines, that habit of overthinking has become less helpful and more detrimental to my peace of mind.

     So, all that being said, I hope you'll join me this month in taking a step back, taking an extra deep breath, and giving yourself permission to stop trying to do and think of everything at once. To stop thinking of every possible outcome and failure and worrying constantly, and to let our hearts rest a bit more. I saw a quote recently by Carrie Bradshaw and she said: "Sometimes we need to stop analyzing the past, stop planning the future, stop figuring out precisely how we feel, stop deciding exactly what we want, and just see what happens."

      It's good to see you again October:)


  1. This is beautiful. Learning to let your hair down and be okay with whatever is in store for you an letting go of those plans is so, so hard. But so, so good. <3

    // Samantha

  2. SOMEHOW you frequently manage to say what's on my heart and bring encouragement. I hope you know that you softly touch so many people with your words and the things you share. We recently returned from living overseas and my brain was always in overdrive bc it's logistically harder to raise a family overseas. So many things to think and plan through. So now that we are "home" I am trying to let myself relax. It's so much healthier! I'm in for your October goal!