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What was REALLY causing Anne's depression?


Here's one of those "must read" articles if you are feeling stopped with a stubborn issue. Rather than conclude that "EFT doesn't work" or that "I've tried everything," it is much more useful (and accurate) to say, "I haven't found the real underlying issue yet." Read how Anne Presuel-Moreno was faced with this dilemma and how she creatively uncovered the true cause of her depression. Pay particular attention to her "conversation with her brother." Very creative.

by Anne Presuel-Moreno

Recently, I felt very depressed and scared about something that would (normally) seem to be a very positive thing: a possible move as a result of a very good job offer (my husband's, not mine).

I spoke with a friend who suggested that I didn't like change. I agreed with that at the time, but upon reflection, I realized it isn't about change itself, but rather, I'm happy here, where I'm at. That evening I continued to mope around, and the next morning, I awoke with a feeling of dread and depression. Finally, I told myself that I needed to tap on it. (I had to get to work and needed to be available for my client ... a very good motivation for identifying and clearing out the feelings.)

I started by rubbing my sore spot and saying "Even though I'm feeling depressed, I deeply and completely love and accept myself." I tapped one time through. It didn't shift. So, I started again. Same thing. Nothing happened. I knew that "feeling depressed" was likely made up of a number of aspects, beliefs or fears, and that I would need to address them one-by-one.

But how to figure out what they were?

I decided to imagine myself having a conversation with my brother regarding why I was depressed about the possibility of having to move. (Notice my language there: I felt like I "have to" move, rather than "choosing to" move. Always watch how you frame things as you think or speak.) Here's how the conversation went in my mind. Also, I tapped while I did this.

"Gosh, Steve, I just really hate the idea of moving. I mean, I've worked so hard to get my life to be what I want it to be here. I'm happy! I feel safe! Last time I moved, my life turned to crap!" I began to cry here, so I knew I was connecting with one of the aspects of feeling depressed. I had two issues here: feeling safe and what happened last time I moved. I continued.

"What if that happens again?" The feelings intensified to a 10, and I began to sob, while I tapped, until it reduced in intensity to a 4 or so. I continued in my mind. "I just feel so safe here, and if I leave, I don't know that I can count on the world to be a safe place." Here was another issue: not knowing if I could count on the world to be a safe place. I had more intensity again - up to about a 9 this time. I continued to tap and stayed with that thought for a minute or two.

Then ... release. Big sigh. I affirmed Patricia Carrington's choices method as I stated "Even though I'm afraid the world isn't a safe place, I choose to see areas where it is." (Starting small here.) I began to feel even better, although there was still some intensity - about a 3. I did another round of tapping. "Even though I'm afraid of the big, bad world, I choose to see it as a safe place. The world is a safe and friendly place." Big release.

I felt better for most of the day. That evening, I began to feel depressed again. I knew I needed to get to the bottom of this. So I began again. "Even though I'm feeling depressed, I deeply and completely love and accept myself." Again, nothing shifted. My language wasn't cutting it. I was depressing myself (a term used by Dr. William Glasser in his Choice Theory methods), and I didn't know why.

This time, I actually called a friend who is an EFT practitioner. I asked her to listen to me and help me identify the feelings. I talked about leaving my beloved Charlottesville, Virginia, about having to start all over in creating a new practice, but none of these triggered anything. I just felt a little sad (and tapped on that), but nothing significant stood out.

Then I said "My husband will be teaching at the new university and I'm afraid some hot little thing will make a play for him. I'm afraid I'll lose him." Bingo! Interestingly, he's never, ever given me any reason to think something like this. This was old stuff from a former relationship, and I knew it. I began to cry, and I tapped on this fear. It spiked at a 10 when I said it, but quickly went to a 0.

I felt much better again. I knew I could then be more at choice about this decision than I could before all the tapping. Here's a good question: do I want to move? Hmmm ... not sure yet, but I don't feel frantic about the possibility, and that's a huge difference.

If you don't have someone available at the moment to process a feeling with, it is a good idea to create someone in your mind: someone you trust and who will listen to you as you identify the emotionally-charged issues. This gives you an opportunity to shift the emotions quickly and easily.

Anne Presuel-Moreno



