I’m Bored!



Dear Dharma, 

Sure hoping you can help me out with this, as I am approaching the end of my rope!  I am a separated dad, with excellent access to my son who lives with his mom.  I have tried to keep him engaged with me, and feel like I have done a good job there, but lately things have soured.

He is constantly whining about how bored he is, and how there’s nothing to do when he is with me.  First of all, there is all the same stuff as there was 6 months ago when he wasn’t bored, and secondly there is even more to do now, since I got a fancy new Xbox thing for Christmas.

How can he be bored?  He is in soccer and I make sure he goes to all the practices and games, he has an Xbox at home and a new one at my house, he has a smart phone, an iPad, we have great cable, the list goes on!

How can I make him see there is lots to do, if he would only quit whining?

Kids These Days!

Dear Kids These Days,

Yeah, kids!  They sure are a pain, aren’t they!  Almost as much as the parents who insist on filling every possible moment of their child’s life with an activity, a class, a game, an electronic gadget, to ensure their little tyke never experiences the horrors of being bored.  We take every opportunity to overstimulate them at every turn and then… something slips through the cracks... there’s an unscheduled moment… little Tommy finds himself somewhere he’s never been before… with nothing to do…

Dunh dunh dunh

Of course he’s going to whine and complain… it’s uncomfortable!  He doesn’t have the skills to entertain himself, why would he?  He’s never had to!



Well, dad, don’t fret, because out of the darkness comes the light.

Meaning kids need to get down and dirty in the boredom, really wallow in it, before the desire to do something about it kicks in.  And once it does, a whole lot of other good things happen.  Creativity, initiative, decision making, ingenuity, camaraderie, strategic thinking, problem solving, exercise… this is all waiting for your kid, right there on the other side of boredom!

You just have to let him get there. And stop putting obstacles like smart phones, iPad’s and cable TV in his way.

Also, check this out for some great ideas, like the Boredom Buster Jar.


Got a question for Dharma? She’s probably got an answer!



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Categories: Advice, conflict, Family


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