Incest at Game Night

I was recently at a friend’s house for a game night, when, as my favorite social gatherings do, someone inadvertently brought up the subject of kink (i.e., less conventional sexual interests and/or practices, including BDSM, fetishes, etc.). This person had misheard someone else during a word-game and thought they had said “daddy,” instead of whatever the word actually was. Some of us chuckled, but she then expressed disgust for incest fantasies, in general.

I was surprised that no one else volunteered opinions, so I casually remarked, in a joking tone to keep things light-hearted, that we do not kink-shame in that basement. My jest was met with a spirited “thank you” from another guest, and then the conversation topic was promptly changed.

Presumably unbeknownst to the woman who initiated the conversation, at least half of that crowd is somewhat kinky. Of the attendees present while I was there, three of us consider ourselves kinky, one is kink-curious, one prefers playing a submissive role in non-kinky romantic relationships, and two have had incest fantasies for extended periods of time.

For anyone curious, incest fantasies often (but not always) overlap with interests in dominance, submission, and discipline. Daddy-daughter, mommy-son, and other family-themed role-playing dynamics are not uncommon among kinksters.

Even casual references to this type of role-playing happen in our everyday lives. For example, while vacationing to Las Vegas with close friends a couple of years ago, my friends and I attended a “bar crawl” excursion on one of our final nights in the city. During our outing, we met a sober young man tending to his soon-to-be-recklessly-intoxicated best friend, whose birthday was that day, and who was determined to have a night he would not remember. Throughout the night, the sober man chaperoned our group to ensure that not just his best friend, but also each of my friends, too, returned to the party bus before departure to and from the various club destinations. As a result of his helpful role, one of my friends elected to coquettishly address the sober man as, “Daddy,” all night.

As I’ve written before, and as I frequently say, sexual fantasies are generally harmless.

Fantasies do not become problematic until you either cannot continue with your regular, everyday life because your attention is wholly consumed by the fantasies, or as soon as you start expressing the fantasies in ways that unfavorably impact and/or harm yourself or other people.

Fantasize about anything you want, even taboo ideas. Fantasies can be explorative, can help people learn to cope with a multitude of stressors and past experiences, and can be excellent outlets to express creativity.

If you choose to take it a step further and act out your fantasies, as long as you are exploring them with fellow adults, everyone involved enthusiastically consents for the entire duration of each activity, safety is maintained, and no permanent harm is risked, go for it!



  1. Interesting article. Thanks for your perspective. Valentines day started here. 8am. I find it another shopping day in the Pope Wall St calendar… Pretty sad when we allocate one day of the year to tell our lover/mother/father that we love them with material gifts or tokenistic gestures. If we can’t do it in the little ways for 365 days of the year then something is wrong.
    Then again an entire elite class is built around patriarchal oligarchs who can’t love their wives enough to elicit an orgasm. Last time I asked an old boy from my school where the G spot was he and his medical degree started this talk about his sphincter…. I had to stop him and say NO…. FOR HER

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for reading! I agree with your sentiment about Valentine’s Day, but I also appreciate that, despite the capitalistic marketing and obligatory gift-giving expectations (which can be negotiated, as I prefer for my partners to not buy gifts, and for us, instead, to find an experience that we can share together), it can serve as a reminder for lovers who wouldn’t have otherwise remembered to be prompted to show appreciation for each other. Regarding your second sentiment, amazing. It surprises and disappoints me how little some medical professionals know about the female reproductive system (including what chemicals are good or bad for it!). I wish more female-male pairs, in particular, were familiar with female anatomy, too, and were genuinely comfortable exploring its capabilities with each other.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yep. Their wives are generally very familiar with their cash flow. Then again I knew a cop whose wife thought she was working to pay off a mortgage for 10 years and he was using the credit card attached to it to know the anatomy of every female he could in the city including all his female colleagues who had treated her for a fool. Imagine my friend’s few days of uncertainty waiting for results from the clinic because her husband still had to get some at home too. In fact I had asked him at the footy club not to tell me the details of such things that were between them. I have never understood other blokes or maybe I understand them too well because my mother is intelligent and as a very small boy I saw grown men topping up her glass and having to touch her even though they hated her. Nothing scares the boys club so much as an intelligent woman. A genuinely free thinking woman.


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