Monthly Archives: December 2013

2013 Year End Superlatives

Pre-Surgery Irony

I had surgery the other day, and anyone who has ever had any surgery knows that you are prohibited from eating or drinking the day of and possibly the night before. So you’re usually starving going into the surgery, like myself.

 As I was wheeled into the pre-surgery room, we passed a setup of sticky buns and danishes. I thought to myself “they have got to be kidding me” as my stomach rumbles from hunger pangs.

Shortly after they began asking me questions to verify my identity and my medical history or any medical conditions.  A few minutes later a lady I had just seen getting prepped for pre-surgery downstairs, was wheeled into the station next to me separated by only a curtain. They proceeded to ask her the same/similar questions as me.

Now let me paint a mental picture of this woman’s physical appearance.  She was a 5’7 black woman with a tall/big build (mostly stomach) and she walked with a slight limp.

Prep Dr.:Any allergies?

Lady: Yes, Red sauce. (I chuckled to myself because I’m sure they were referring to medications etc., but can’t hurt to share)

Dr:Are you diabetic?

Lady: Yes

Dr: High Blood Pressure/Cholesterol?

Lady: Yes, both

Dr: Yea your pressure was a little high when we took it down stairs, so we’ll take it again in a minute.

Dr: Do you smoke?

Lady: Yes

Dr: How much?

Lady: I used to smoke a pack a day, now I’m down to a half a pack.

Dr: Do you have asthma or any breathing issues?

Lady: Yes, Sleep apnea

Dr: Heart disease or issues?

Lady: I have a heart murmur.

Dr: Any previous surgeries?

Lady: I had knee surgery in July.

Dr: What’s your height and weight?

Lady: 5’7 and I’m 265 lbs.

Dr. What are you having done today?

Lady: Carpal tunnel release.

Dr: On which hand?

Lady: My right hand.

Dr: Do you have any questions?

Lady: No but I’m hungry, and yall had all those sticky buns right outside the door, tempting me.

I laughed so hard, because I was thinking the same thing. But I was also thinking that those sweets were the last thing she needed to be concerned with.

I know I’m no “skinny mini” but, generally speaking I’m healthy at least to say I have no hypertension, diabetes, sleep apnea, high cholesterol etc., in spite of the fact that I’m pre-disposed to all of these issues.  I also try to work out and exercise on a regular basis, but after I finished chuckling to myself at the irony of this lady’s predicament, I felt sad for her. She has all these health issues and she was still a relatively young woman, probably around 40 years old.  I don’t know her story but I hope she’s doing what she can to get all of those issues under control, or carpal tunnel will be the least of her concerns.

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