How to reclaim your identity?


As mothers of children with disabilities it is natural your childs needs are met and come first. Yet when this takes over and suddenly you notice the things you once enjoyed or spent time doing as a distant memory. Or you are just too exhausted there is no energy left and no motivation. How can you find a balance and reclaim your identity yet not compromise being a mother.

Here are a few tips to consider:

  1. Focus on what zaps your energy during the day, by this I mean anything that does not add meaning or serve you – drains you. An example could be that one person who constantly moans and talk negatively. Sub consciously this is having a negative affect on your own behaviour and can bring you down. Do you know anyone like that? One way is to turn their negative comment into a positive one.
  2. Incorporate meditation into your daily routine. This is your time to clear your mind and find calmness. Once you experience the benefits of meditation you will practice this on a regular basis.
  3. Create a vision board. Get a piece of paper and cut out pictures that represent you and the things you enjoy or want to achieve. Stick the pictures on the paper until you have a full vision of you. You may also add key words which represent you eg fun, strong. When complete place this somewhere you can see it daily.
  4. Pay attention to your well being, are you keeping yourself healthy in body as well as mind? Are you eating regularly and eating the right foods? Do you exercise? The impact on your health as a result of being a parent of a disabled child can be dramatic. Look at ways to improve this.
  5. What excites you and makes you feel really positive? Is there something you used to enjoy and have stopped?
    6. Can you introduce one thing back into your life?

Look at your wardrobe, is there an outfit that makes you feel great. Dig it out and start wearing it. This is about reclaiming you and clothes are a quick and easy way. Perhaps introduce a bit of colour, or start wearing skirts again. Whatever you choose, have fun with it.

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