If You're Doing This, You're Making a HUGE Mistake!


Have you experienced a loss so painful, you couldn’t imagine how you’d get through the days?

Suddenly, they’re gone and you’re faced with a reality you never imagined.

Now what?


Many of us have experienced profound loss. Whether through death, divorce, or someone walking out of your life. The aftermath of losing someone can be painful and traumatizing. It can rattle you to the core and knock you down. Make you afraid you’ll never be ok again.

The process of grief is messy, challenging and extremely frightening, leaving you to scramble for anything to make the pain go away.

I’ve been there. A few times actually. I’ve experienced losses that were unimaginable, inescapable and unrelenting. Pain that showed up everywhere I turned. In the smile from a stranger, a hug from a friend, songs on the radio, random words uttered in the midst of a thousand others.

It was everywhere, with no way out in sight.

And so…I discovered the power of avoidance. Yup, you read it right, avoidance.

It was like a magical healing solvent to all my sorrows. Just remove the things that hurt and everything would be okay. Remove the people, places, thoughts, feelings. Even the memories. This was my solution for feeling good and moving on.

Holy crap… I’ve never been so wrong. Yeah, it worked for awhile, until it didn’t. Inevitably, things seeped through the cracks of my imagined armor.

And how did I respond? I made my world smaller.  Avoided more things, closed off to more people, shut down more memories.

When I finally realized what I was doing, I looked around and my world had become a small and dark hole. My magical solvent of avoidance did nothing more than deepen, prolong, and solidify my pain.

Can you relate?

Some of us will choose to avoid and others will do it without realizing it. Either way, the results are the same.

- Making yourself smaller.

- Abandoning yourself.

- Closing doors.

- Making the pain last longer.

- Sacrificing the fullness of your life, showing up as a fraction of your potential.

Choosing to work through your grief and walk straight into your pain isn’t easy. It takes courage. There will be tears, anger, kicking, screaming, and who knows what else. You’ll face some hard truths and own some stuff you may wish you could erase. You’ll heal some old wounds and reprogram some old beliefs. You’ll learn new skills so you can show up in life in a different way.

You’ll transcend life in a way that aligns you with your deepest longings and desires. Giving yourself the FREEDOM and PERMISSION to receive it all!

It may not be easy AND it will be the absolute best choice you make for your life!

With love and joy,


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