At the best of times, an estrangement involves a constant process of managing uncertainties but naturally, with what is happening right now, a crisis state is being triggered in many people as they feel an added pressure to respond/react but at the same time they are unsure of what exactly to do.

In my last video on Estrangement and the impact of the Corona virus, I mentioned how I encourage people to follow their gut feelings or their intuition. Even when clients come in and they say ‘my gut is telling me to do this or that’, I’ll more than likely support that as they are their own experts.

But it’s very important to recognise the difference between being intuitive as opposed to being impulsive, as sometimes these can get confused.

Impulse is when we are driven by habit and conditioning, by strong and often very negative emotions, such as shame, fear and guilt, and a sense of obligation or duty.

In life, we adapt ourselves so much around our family and depending on how stressful the home environment is, we can be so focused on surviving and orienting around the many conflicts, perspectives, needs…that we identify more by our adaption and by our conditioning and lose touch with our intuition. Or we learn to distrust it, because if we were to listen to it, it might tell you walk away from the situation and which would cause more pain…so we ignore it and lose one of the most important resources available to us.

Intuition is a knowing that doesn’t require thinking…a knowing that something isn’t safe or possibly isn’t the right thing to do…whereas impulse will prompt you to act/react in a way that is counter to what your intuition is alerting you to.

So now, more than ever, maybe you need to step back from the many internal cords pulling you in multiple different directions and go inwards and try to centre yourself…tap into the part of you that knows exactly what to do. And that might to be reconnect or it might be to stay where you are…only you know best, you know your family better than anyone else and you know the right thing to do…so it’s time to start rebuilding trust in yourself and your inner wisdom.

Take care


Written by Karl Melvin