Monday, September 9, 2013

What Would You Do?

I know that it could not just be me who know people who comment about everything and everybody....."Why does she have that outfit on?" "Why does she wear her hair like that?" "Why are they dancing like that?" "Why would they put that sign right there?"....blah, blah, blah, blah!!!

Now there are times when we see something or someone, and we can't help but say something. For instance, when Whitney Houston would come out in public looking like something just wasn't right, many of us had something to say:

"Bobby got her on crack." "She looks a hot mess." "She is destroying her gift."......

We are all probably guilty of making comments about people and things...However, when it is habitual ...IT DRIVES ME CRAZY!

In my all time favorite book, The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle talks about the idea of trying not to judge everything. Like, just eating dinner and not thinking about whether or not it is good, or maybe looking at a person and not judging them at all. This is called just letting everything and everyone BE. I consciously try and practice this, and it makes life so much more enjoyable.

For instance, I was in Wholefoods on Sunday, and there was this older lady with a huge butt. I'm not talking about a big butt, but she had a HUGE butt. Yea, I looked at her butt, but I refused to let myself say one word. I just looked at her butt, looked at it again, and kept on waiting for my omelet to be prepared. Why would I waste my time worrying or talking about that lady's butt when I have lots of things going on in my life that I need to focus on and work on?

Really, take one entire day and try not to judge anything or anybody, just let things and people BE and see how much more peaceful your day will be. 

When I'm talking to someone who seems to have something to say about everybody and everything, in my mind, I am saying things like "Why do you care about the dress that she has on?" or "People can wear their hair anyway that they want to."  Eventually, the negativity dampens my mood, and I am literally ready to cover my ears and run away:

So, there are two questions on my mind when this happens: Why do some people feel the need to make comments about everything and everybody, and what should people do who are subjected to this negativity.....

I have lots of theories as to why people feel the need to judge everything and everybody...They are trying to find something to talk about, they are unhappy with themselves, maybe they were raised in a negative household and are unaware that they do it, and my theories go on and on and on......

However, maybe we should ask people who do this WHY?

My second question is what should people do who are subjected to this. And, I have some theories about this as well....Maybe we could say "Why do you care about that?" or we could smile and not say anything, or maybe we could counter the negativity with something positive. These are the only solutions that I have come up with, and I am not sure if they are solutions.

Normally, I will limit my contact what that person; I won't hang out with him/her much, and I make sure that my conversations with him/her are short and sweet.

Please, help me with this.. What do you do in this situation?


Tracy Ricks said...

Wow!! Another great read and oh sooo true!! Now I'm judging and wondering why did you writet this??? Lol

Natasha Mccain said...

I'm like you, i don't hang out with them as much, but now i feel compelled to say something because they just may not know how negative they are and that its something i don't enjoy hearing. I think i will the approach with complimenting the person they are being negative about, consistently doing this will train them to think before they speak. :))

Jacqueline said...

Tracy, I think that wondering why I wrote this post is not judging. You just want to know why... and guess what? I'm not telling you. lol

Natasha, that sounds like a great idea. Maybe, the positive comments will make them think about those negative comments.

I also secretly think "Cut people some slack." lol

Sunshine said...

I usually do like Natasha and counter it with something positive or try to limit my contact with that person.

Jacqueline said...

Sunshine, most of the time, the people who always comment negatively about other people, are not bad people. They just have that one not so pleasant quality. So, I think I will try the countering with something positive and continue to limit the contact. Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment.

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