Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Ocean's Zero, Part 4

Previously, on MinerBumping... Rebel leader JTClone Ares' dreams came true when he was contacted by TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet and Captain Rick Tyson, who claimed to have a mole in CODEdot. They told him they would pull a massive heist and transfer the assets to JTClone's alliance, The Clone Republic. But to ensure everything went according to plan, they needed JTClone to give Captain Rick alliance executor corp director roles.

Rick and TheInternet firmly believed it was best to give Rick director powers, rather than relying on JTClone to do everything himself.

Though he'd first met Rick only about an hour and a half earlier, JTClone was willing to put his alliance in Rick's hands. High risk, high reward.

Before things progressed any further, TheInternet wanted confirmation that Rick had total control over JTClone's alliance. It was absolutely essential, if the heist were to have maximum impact.

Rick, the newest alliance director, was busy wrapping Christmas presents. Once finished, he would get another update from his high-level spy in CODEdot. Then they would learn if the heist would be performed that night.

The level of anticipation grew once again. JTClone and TheInternet were willing to wait on Rick's present-wrapping task. Wrapping, like EVE heists, cannot be rushed.

TheInternet got the idea to have EveNews24 publicize the heist after it was finished. JTClone was ecstatic. EVE's most trusted news source! JTClone imagined his portrait on the front page as The Clone Republic's glorious deeds were shared throughout the galaxy.

As time went by, the heist seemed less likely to be performed that night. There were a lot of assets in CODEdot stockpiles throughout highsec, but critical personnel were still online. Those men could stop the heist. Better that the theft take place while they slept.

TheInternet also believed that would be interested in hearing about a successful heist. JTClone could use the extra publicity to support a carebear CSM candidate. JTClone was thrilled by the idea. Victory was within his reach. This feeling must be what New Order Agents experience every day!

As they continued to await more information from Rick, JTClone and TheInternet discussed the implications of the heist for the umpteenth time. They both agreed that it would spell the beginning of the end of the New Order.

Now it was JTClone's turn to come up with a way to slap CODEdot in the face: Maybe the high-level spy could have CODEdot offer to surrender to The Clone Republic for three billion isk!

JTClone cackled with delight. He could even use the heist as a jumping-off point for another anti-Code speech. Unless a Christmas miracle occurred, the New Order would surely be doomed.

To be continued...

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Ocean's Zero, Part 3

Previously, on MinerBumping... JTClone Ares, leader of a rebel alliance called The Clone Republic, was approached by TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet and Captain Rick Tyson, who claimed to have high-level spies in CODEdot. They invited JTClone to join their conspiracy to plan a massive heist of New Order assets. JTClone enthusiastically agreed.

As a new member of the conspiracy, JTClone Ares was sworn to absolute secrecy. No one could ever be told what took place in the private chat.

Now all the rebels needed to do was hammer out the details. How would the stolen CODEdot assets be transferred to JTClone's alliance? JTClone volunteered to set up offices in each station. But Captain Rick and TheInternet didn't yet know the locations.

For maximum flexibility, TheInternet recommended that JTClone grant Captain Rick some roles in JTClone's alliance. That way, Rick wouldn't need to waste time coordinating every step with JTClone on the night of the heist.

JTClone suggested that Rick simply trade the stolen assets to him. However, there was no guarantee JTClone would be online at the time of the heist.

Besides, trading is risky.

The rebels' scheming was interrupted by some alarming news: There was a 50/50 chance the heist could take place immediately. Everyone's adrenaline started pumping.

JTClone's concerns about whether to trade or give Rick roles were put on hold as the conspirators fantasized about the heist.

The impact of the heist on CODEdot morale would be enormous. Might it even be... the end of the New Order?

JTClone imagined himself at the moment of glory, surrounded by his fellow rebels in the Anti-Ganking channel. He would be the ultimate hero of the resistance, the first rebel carebear to score a victory against the New Order. The "Fishing Spider" would become a legend. When viewed from this perspective, JTClone's earlier worries about giving out roles seemed so small, so insignificant.

JTClone granted Captain Rick a role that would enable him to rent offices. However, Rick didn't have the director role, which he'd need to be able to bring new corps into The Clone Republic alliance. There was no need, after all. They were only talking about transferring assets.

For the first time, TheInternet raised a new possibility: His high-level spies might be able to coordinate a defection. The spy could cause an entire corporation to leave CODEdot and join The Clone Republic. The propaganda effect would be collosal.

With the "director" role in JTClone's alliance, Rick could do pretty much whatever he wanted. Would JTClone be willing to take that risk--to give that power to someone he'd met barely an hour earlier?

TheInternet once again stressed how important it was that Rick be given the necessary roles. The New Order's downfall could be orchestrated at any moment.

To be continued...

Monday, December 29, 2014

Ocean's Zero, Part 2

Previously, on MinerBumping... JTClone Ares spent months recruiting carebears into his rebel alliance, The Clone Republic. He didn't know how to strike against the New Order, so he just kept on recruiting. But then, two days before Christmas, he was contacted by TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet and Captain Rick Tyson. They claimed to have a high-level spy in CODEdot, and they needed JTClone's help in bringing the New Order down.
JTClone Ares > accepted
JTClone Ares > lets burn code for a little bit
JTClone Ares > or all the way
Although initially concerned that he might be walking into a trap, JTClone couldn't resist joining the conspiracy. Especially since it mostly involved "someone else" doing something to stop the New Order.

TheInternet started to unveil the details of the plot. It involved a major heist of New Order assets.

Captain Rick added that there were actually multiple spies in the New Order who would assist with the plan. At least one of them, according to TheInternet, had a "golden ticket": Full access to New Order Logistics, the largest corp in CODEdot.

For the last two and a half years, the New Order has been completely victorious, winning battle after battle. But Rick believed that a spectacular heist would change the momentum of the war. Finally, the rebellion might have a chance. JTClone nodded along agreeably.

To fully exploit the positive effects of the heist, the resistance would need a single leader. JTClone immediately saw himself in that role.

If JTClone wasn't sold on the conspiracy before, he was now. This was his chance to wrest control of highsec from its democratically elected leader. For his own part in the heist, JTClone would need a ship--and a well-tanked one at that. (To a carebear, "tanked to high heaven" means the ship has at least a small shield extender to go with its cargo expanders.)

The conspirators grew increasingly excited. Visions of stolen CODEdot loot danced in their heads. They could already taste the rebel victory which had so long been denied them.

Because the New Order has its assets stored all throughout highsec, the heist would need to be perfectly timed and coordinated. The slightest mistake could result in failure.

JTClone was all-in. Now he only needed to know when to be online so he could take part in the heist. His job would be to ensure that all the stolen assets got transferred to offices under the control of his alliance, The Clone Republic.

Unfortunately, this would need to be an "alarm clock op", well outside of JTClone's preferred time zone. No matter. A little sleep deprivation was a small price to pay for one hundred stolen Catalysts.

Wait, a hundred?

Actually, the New Order has far more than a hundred gank ships in its possession. It goes through a massive amount of hardware each week. Captain Rick and TheInternet estimated more than 15 billion isk of ships in Uedama alone. The total heist would net the conspirators tens of billions. With that much isk, they would all be swimming in PLEX!

Upon learning the full scope of the plan, JTClone could barely contain himself. He once again affirmed his willingness to participate in the conspiracy. There was no mistaking it now: JTClone Ares was a rebel carebear. The conversation was clear evidence of his intent to commit treason against the rightful rulers of highsec. If the dastardly plot succeeded, it could very well mean the end of the New Order.

To be continued...

Sunday, December 28, 2014

Kills of the Week
















Saturday, December 27, 2014

Ocean's Zero, Part 1

Meanwhile, in the Anti-Ganking channel...
JTClone Ares > yes
JTClone Ares > dont worry
JTClone Ares > he owns a blog so
Alexis Mayfield > ... you mean james 315?
JTClone Ares > no
JTClone Ares > not that faggot





TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > o/
JTClone Ares > o/
JTClone Ares > yeah
JTClone Ares > ah so allies?
JTClone Ares > or try to get 2+ man fleets
JTClone Ares > np
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > you can't tell anybody
JTClone Ares > no worries
JTClone Ares > i tend to keep the info to myself
JTClone Ares > okay
JTClone Ares > hmm
JTClone Ares > just to fore warn you
JTClone Ares > my honor and your honor
JTClone Ares > oh and just to let you know
JTClone Ares > like an FYI
JTClone Ares > never the other way around
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > like the fisherman spider
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > smart
JTClone Ares > so now the question is
JTClone Ares > when shall we start
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > this will be run in stages

To be continued...

Friday, December 26, 2014

Yes, the Code Always Wins

The Christmas season has been filled with miracles.


On Christmas Eve, notorious rebel leader Gorila Vengaza joined CODE.



















And the gifts kept on coming...