The Natural

A former angry young man, Lost star Josh Holloway has learned to blend a certain amount of mellowness with maturity. But he has also found that a little rage is still pretty good fuel

"Piss and vinegar," says Josh Holloway. It doesn't sound appetizing as a recipe for living any more than it does for a cocktail, but Holloway believes that good old-fashioned anger represents an underappreciated resource for men. And we don't give it nearly enough credit for getting us where we are today.

Case in point: Four years ago, Holloway was unemployed and in debt. He was about to give up on acting and become a real estate agent just so he could finally propose to his then-girlfriend, Yessica Kumala, with a straight face. Then, on the very day he was expecting his agent's license in the mail, he landed his career-making role as con man Sawyer on Lost. He and Yessie jetted off to Hawaii (where Lost is filmed and where Holloway and Kumala soon said "I do"). But all the resulting success, he believes, comes from that place of internal combustion.

"The drive I had, the need to break out and go, there was nothing but anger behind that," says the 37-year-old actor, who spent his twenties traveling the world while working as a model. "All that travel changed me, because I saw the world beyond the Bible Belt rural Georgia mentality I grew up with."

It was anger that drove him to pursue acting so he could leave modeling. It finally pushed him--more pissed than ever--to that make-or-break audition that changed his life. And here's the interesting thing, he says: "I'm much less angry now, but I use anger as a way to feel on my game. So I find I make myself angry to get back on it and not let my guard down. It's a manufactured thing--when I have something big I need to do, like getting into shape or doing a big scene. I have to work up to it. I think we need that anger to push us."

Ah, but hotheadedness alone doesn't get the girl, as every leading man knows. When asked how Sawyer finally landed Kate Austen (the Canadian beauty Evangeline Lilly), who played him off against his rival, Jack, Holloway says, "In real life, I would've told that woman to head on down the road if it meant taking a beating like that. But that's the dynamic of the Sawyer character. If you wanna get the girl, you gotta take your beating!"

These days, Holloway has also had to learn to let a little balance enter his life. To counter his natural impulse toward irascibility, he retreats to his oceanfront haven in Hawaii. "I love my existence here," he says. "It's calming. Having a home on the water and doing this show in Hawaii is healing. The beauty and the peace here get you. If you can find that place for yourself, wherever it might be, you're absolutely golden."

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