Category Archives: pants

I Don’t Like Pants

In case you didn’t know, I don’t like pants. If you do know, then this post comes as no surprise.

In fact, if you have ever even met me, you would know this about me as I make it a point to announce my disdain for the clothing item from the beginning. “Hi, I’m Christene. I don’t like pants. How are you?” Just like that.

It is then no wonder that my children have also caught on to this. Unfortunately they are not fully immersed in this whole socialization thing, so they don’t quite understand that even though we don’t like pants, we still kind of have to wear them. Especially in public.

My daughter is *still* not potty trained. At this point I am just waiting for society to shame her into it, because I have clearly gone wrong somewhere. She knows how to use the potty, has done so in the past, but for whatever reason absolutely refuses to do it on a regular basis. So I took away her diapers, put her in regular underwear, and hope the discomfort helps her figure it out.

The only thing she has figured out is how to change herself. But not all the way. She will remove her soiled clothes, clean herself off, put on new underwear, but no pants. Ever. I asked, and she shrugged, replying something along the lines of “why bother?”

Despite the fact that I am notorious for not wearing pants around the house, I think I am going to have to implement a new pants rule, and actually follow it myself. No one within the parameters of my home can remove their pants for prolonged periods of time. There. Done. Pants wearing shall commence. And pantlessness shall be punished with time-outs and solitary confinement.

So basically, as soon as I get home tonight, I am going straight to my room.

Pants Are Overrated

Pants are overrated. “What is this insanity?” you may be wondering. Well, hold on, because this is (or seems) like a valid point. If you are a man you will be very distressed to learn that pants really are not for you. If you are a woman, pants are even less for you. Now, before anyone makes any feminist statements, don’t worry, that is not where I am going with this.

I do not propose a relapse into the long dresses of the early nineteenth century. Modern apparel is appropriate. As for the men folk, kilts are perfectly suitable. Yes, kilts. If they are good enough for the British royal family, then I am sure you can make due. And as far as I am concerned, men would look far more attractive in kilts than pants. Think of all the accessories!

Pants, while fashionable, and appealing to some senses, are rather cumbersome. You may disagree and think jeans to be the epitome of casualness and comfort, but think about it for a second. How much easier would it be to not have to wear them? As I beat mine into submission each time I cannot help but wonder.

Yes, pants are in style, and they make sense in colder weather, but so do tights, or long socks. And while tights might be lumped in with the category of pants, they are stretchy, require no buckles, buttons, zippers or any other fastening paraphernalia. Long socks are even more versatile in that they allow for temperature adjustments and various adornments (should you be so inclined). The men could wear them with ribbons (again, should you be so inclined), and as for the women, well, knee high socks are pretty hot (example above).

Since the month of May I have only worn pants on rare occasions. If the things were not in style any longer, I would not miss them, nor would I begin wearing them again in the colder months. I only do so because it begins to get cooler outside, at times I get lazy, and they are an acceptable form of clothing. If it were not for the last part I would eschew them altogether and spend year long in dresses and tights.

As for men, tell me exactly what is wrong with the kilt, or simply tights? Men were wearing these for centuries. When did it become unacceptable? This is not a rhetorical question; I actually do not know.


Stuff! Like The Magazine, Except Way Better

I have had crazy writer’s block lately, so in my incapacitated state, I have not done a lot . However, I did a little, and here it is. For your viewing pleasure.
Stuff I Pinned. I am putting it at the top of the list this time. Because these pretty pictures are better than a lot of my writing right now.
There is something going around. And this can help.
If you have any great topic ideas for me, share in the comments.