1743: Coffee

Explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb.
Revision as of 16:04, 7 October 2016 by (talk) (Megan is pouring coffee grounds, not coffee beans. Turkish coffee is not filtered, you're supposed to not drink the last bit and thus leave (most of) the slurry in the cup.)
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Remind me to order another pack of coffee filters from Dyson. Man, these things are EXPENSIVE.
Title text: Remind me to order another pack of coffee filters from Dyson. Man, these things are EXPENSIVE.


Ambox notice.png This explanation may be incomplete or incorrect: Very brief summary, please update

This strip follows the frequently used theme of people growing up but finding themselves unable or unwilling to accept traditional adult roles ((see 441: Babies, 905: Homeownership, 616: Lease, and 1674: Adult). In many cultures, drinking coffee is considered an adult activity; most children aren't served coffee and likely wouldn't like the taste if they were, however there are cultures where coffee is served to children, as in many Hispanic countries with "Café con leche" (coffee with milk) which is at least 50% milk with plenty of sugar.

In this case, Cueball and Megan are anticipating guests. Offering coffee to houseguests is a commonly-accepted courtesy in the United States. However, they seem to be unaware of the basics of coffee making. Cueball is concerned that this lack of knowledge is an indication of their mutual immaturity (thinking of himself as a "fake adult"), but Megan is confident that the necessary steps can be determined.

They attempt to make coffee by pouring the ingredients on the ground (misinterpreting the meaning of "ground coffee"), sucking it up with a Dyson vacuum-cleaner (misinterpreting the meaning of "vacuum brewing"), then boiling the mixture by placing the vacuum-cleaner's removable (plastic) canister over a hot stove, and serving the resulting sludge without separating the grounds from the liquid.

Megan says she is a regular "Starbuck" (likely meaning a Starbucks' barista) after serving the batch of coffee. Her misspelling of the chain's name further indicates a general lack of knowledge regarding the subject of coffee.

This method of making coffee would be very expensive as it would most likely destroy the (previously functional) vacuum cleaner. It would probably not be very hygienic either. Furthermore, the removable canisters on bagless vacuums (such as the Dyson shown) are made of plastic and would melt or ignite if placed over direct heat from a stove. Furthermore, failing to remove the grounds before serving would produce a slurry, rather than the smooth golden-brown liquid that is customary in the western world.

The joke here is that Megan misunderstands the words "coffee grounds", attempts to pour coffee grounds on the "ground", tries to vacuum brew the coffee using a vacuum cleaner, and uses the wrong kind of filter (a vacuum cleaner filter instead of a coffee filter) in order to make a proper coffee. It demonstrates her total lack of knowledge of coffee making.

The title-text refers to the extreme expense of replacing the "filter", as vacuum-cleaner filters are considerably more costly than single-use coffee filters. It also suggests that they genuinely believe that a key function of the Dyson is to make coffee, implying that vacuuming is another 'adult' responsibility with which Cueball and Megan are unfamiliar.


[Cueball and Megan are standing.]
Cueball: We should make coffee for our guests.
Megan: Crap. I know nothing about coffee.
Cueball: We're basically fake adults.
Megan: Don't panic. We can figure this out.
[Megan shaking can of coffee grounds out on floor as Cueball watches.]
Megan: We just pour the coffee grounds...
[Megan pouring pail of water over grounds on floor.]
Megan: ...Add water...
[Cueball watching Megan vacuum up mixture with bagless vaccum cleaner.]
vacuum: vrrrr
[Megan holding vacuum cleaner dirt canister over stove, Cueball watching. Vacuum cleaner in background.]
Megan: Now we just hold it over the burners...
oven: hissss
[Megan pouring contents of vacuum cleaner dirt canister into mug, while Cueball watches]
Megan: Annnd...Serve.
Cueball: Nice
Megan: I'm a regular starbuck!

















