Home Featured The House, The Boat, The Car: What Would You Be Willing to Have Sex For?




Most of us say that we wouldn’t have sex in exchange for money or material things. Your first thought may be: I’m not that type of woman/man, that’s reserved for a hoe, a prostitute, or a gigolo. Many of us look upon the lifestyle of money in exchange for sexual favors with a judgmental eye. There is a failure to understand how someone could allow a stranger to use their body as a playground in exchange for money, designer clothes, or other possessions of value. However, sometimes it’s just not presented like that. It’s an opportunity, and you take it. Everyone is trying to get ahead and they will use what they have to get what they want, like Ronnie from The Players Club.

Does it make it any better if you know the person? Maybe you have an established relationship. For example, he could be a professional athlete and he gives you hush money. That money allows you to keep up with the latest trends and stunt on your friends but are you compromising yourself in the process? It may seem to some that the older more established profession of trading money for sex is just the more straightforward way.

Now envision this scenario. You’re sitting at the rooftop bar of a W Hotel, sipping on a perfect Manhattan, and staring at the city’s skyline when a dapper man in a black tailored suit approaches. You sneak a peak out the corner of your eye.  He rubs his freshly trimmed beard and takes the seat next to you. Realizing that he may be invading your space, he apologizes and asks if the seat is taken. You confirm that it is not. He instructs the bartender to supply you with the cocktail of your choice for the remainder of the evening, in light of his initial rude oversight. A sexy smile is plastered on your face. You’re flattered by his kind gesture and the conversation begins. After you have the chance to properly size him up, you conclude that he is handsome.  Three drinks in and you are intrigued. The gentleman extends his hand, softly grabs your manicured fingers and raises them to his lips for a kiss. After the polite gesture he looks into your eyes and asks, “What would it take for you to be mine for the night?”

Credit: Serge Kozak/Corbis
Credit: Serge Kozak/Corbis

You pause searching for clarity. Then, he speaks again, “Name it and it’s yours. Money, a car, or maybe one of those penthouse apartments in the distance.”

You’ve just been propositioned. If you were given a proposition of this nature what would you do? You’re single and alone at a bar. Who has to know? Think of the things that you can do with a little extra cash or a new apartment.

Can you put a price tag on your goods? If so, do you name your price or do you walk away? Keep in mind that many of us have slept with people offering much less. Just stating facts.

Like it or not, at some point or another, most of us have had sex or done sexual favors with the expectation of something tangible in return. Or maybe you’ve slept with someone because they wined and dined your panties off. Does that make you just as bad as the hoe at the motel sleeping with men for money? Either way, it seems as though we are all playing the same quid pro quo game, maybe just on different levels. So many of us think that we would not compromise ourselves but we do. It’s just disguised in different scenarios.

See Also:  Double Standards in Relationships: The 90-Day Sex Rule

Have you ever had sex in exchange for something of value to you? No shade or shame here, we’re just being real.


Ahyiana Angel




Twitter @Ahyiana_Angel

Instagram @Ahyiana_Angel


  1. this might could get interesting….

    In the scenario described, shes at least intrigued by the gentleman, if she gets some bills paid in the process thats a bonus. People have sex for their own pleasure; what separates a prostitute from a women busting it open after dinner and drinks is shes not having it for her own pleasure, he doesnt have to be attractive or good at it for that matter, shes doing it for the funds.

  2. Everyone had sex for something they value. What you consider valuable is based on your personal values and morals. Some people value money over everything, some people value love some people value pleasure.

    The woman busting it open for love is no different than the woman who busting it open to get a light bill paid to an extent. I think people give having s*x for money a bad name because we automatically assume that specific woman will have s*x with any guy that offers her money.

    I’ve had s*x for love (that’s something I valued), that’s how most women end up losing the v-card.

  3. I’d do it… People have had sex with strangers for less. At least in this scenario I could get my school loans and mortgage paid off.

    It could be worse. He’s apparently attractive and I liked him enough to carry on a conversation. I’d want some more information about him before I agreed, but I’d go for it. No shame.

    1. There really is no honor in f*cking for free … excuse my French. It happens, sometimes the trade off is worth it no money in hand necessary. I mean even the women who wait until marriage or in a relationship, still don’t want to bust it open for someone that has nothing to offer. Heck you have to meet me half way.

      I rather have a broken heart with fat pockets, paid off bills etc, than a broken heart (no big O) and all I have to show for it is a frown on my face. No thank you lol


        I know that's right!!! *Hi-Five*

  4. I agree Smilez that what we all "value" as individuals is relative. It also depends on what that woman aspires to be, and what role she wants to play in a mans life. Some women aspire to be long-term girlfriends and/or wives. Period. They will not settle for anything less. Personally, I've never ever intentionally had sex for money or material things. Always been able to get the material things I want for myself. I've always wanted love. Never needed material things from a man. Just his heart, loyalty, sincerity, honesty, and unconditional love. Call me a hopeless "Love Jones" romantic.

  5. Some women do the "exchange thing" because they feel it's the only means to an end to get what they want and need from a man. Many married women actually sleep with their husbands in exchange for getting whatever material things they want. I've spoken with a few married women who are in this situation and it's kind of sad. What they really want is that mans heart, his loyalty, his faithfulness and his undying, everlasting, unconditional love and devotion. They want their emotional needs catered to, but; the man just wants his sexual needs catered to. So a compromise & understanding of sorts is reached between the two. Since these women can't get what they really want, they fill the void with shopping, going to spa's and money. The circumstances evolve into and exchange of wants and needs being met. The woman gets lots of spending money and credit cards and whatever else she wants and the man gets sex. I worked with a woman who was married and her license plate read "I give him sex because he gives me his credit card." Nuff said.

    1. "her license plate read "I give him sex because he gives me his credit card." "

      o__O And what was this license plate attached to? A Yacht??!! How is all of that fitting on a car license plate? That's crazy..

      1. lol. It may have been shorter. Like I give him sex he gives me his credit card…idk. But it was on there…lol
        I've seen license plates that say a lot of crazy stuff

  6. I believe that everyone at some point or to some degree PAYS for sex. Its just a matter of whether its a short sale or a long term investment.
    How many women would have sex with any man who didn't spend on them? Honestly?
    Lets say you meet a guy and you are seriously feeling him physically. You love his conversation. He can make you laugh at will. But he never so much as brakes a $1 while spending any time with you. If the destination doesn't have free admission then it doesn't happen.
    Would any of you even consider giving him any?

    1. This happens all the time in college lol. I think age plays a role in this scenario. Also are we just kicking it/dating or are we trying to get serious. Is he unemployed or going through a financial crisis.

      Also is he not spending the money because he feels I’m not worth it (some men only spend money on women they are courting and not women they are dating). I don’t I could give him any because he views me as not worth something. I mean I’m all about saving a dollar but if a $10 admission (assuming this man is employed and well out of college) is too much to ask then idk.

      Side note: In this make is rain generation men will spend money on sneakers, expensive electronics and strippers (who they probably couldn’t talk to without a 20 in their hand), spending on a women your interested in (even if it’s just casual) shouldn’t be an issue.

    2. Larnel, do you include married people in this statement? "I believe that everyone at some point or to some degree PAYS for sex"
      What about people who wait til they're married before having sex. Or people like Tamara Mowrey who's husband was only her 2nd lover. Or people who marry right out of highschool or college?

      1. Yes I do. Married people I would consider having made the investment. Even if they choose to abstain till marriage time and money was still invested into the relationship to get them to that point.
        Now HS and college may be exceptions as those are typically the only time in life you can have nothing in your pocket or bank account save for flies and lint but still find a sexual partner

      2. I had a coworker who always talked about being with her husband as a transaction. She was always talking about how she was not giving it for free meaning she needed marriage and with the marriage his bank card, credit card.

  7. There's levels to this ish.

    Bottom line I don't drop my drawers for free, it's going to cost you SOMETHING.. and let's be honest what man would truly respect a woman that let's him have his way with her and she nevers ask for anything from him?

  8. Of course I would do it and I've already done it. I have no idea why a woman would give it up for free. You have a lot of women on moral high horses that believe they are not putting a price tag on the kitty. In fact they actually are and don't realize it.

    I'm not getting into a relationship with a man unless he takes care of me. And believe it or not, I can get taken care of without having sex with a man. Being arm candy is oftentimes enough. Men with real money don't have a problem with this. The money and expenses they provide for me is change to them.

    I don't pay any of my bills with my money. My money goes to the bank. I do it because I can. Why bust my butt working two or three jobs to have the lifestyle I want when all I have to do is use my power as a woman and get more. *Shrugs*

    Women have been shamed far too long for thinking like this. I'm totally over it. You can stand on the sidelines with your "morals" in tact if you want. I'll be front and center living the fabulous life.

      1. Payne Well:: 2 coins in the collection plate…

        Men have no problem getting what they want out of the situation. If what I want is dinner, movies and someone whose company I enjoy outside of the bedroom why can’t I have that, if I want my bills paid why cant I have that, heck if I just want the particular man that wants to get in between my legs to come over and cut my grass every Saturday morning in order to get some, then so be it.

        I’m all with women being sexually liberated but don’t be stupid and out in these streets getting used and abused.

    1. We all want to which is why we do it in the first place but it's nice to know that it's appreciated as well. If I am giving you one of my most precious gifts I don't see why the gesture (which ever it may be) shouldn't be reciprocated, I am not saying this has to be everytime we have chex but I do feel like I should be able to turn to you for whatever when needed.

      1. I wish we did, but you know we don't. A lot of times we may do it to get something, someone or somewhere. We do it so he likes us, we do it cause we're scared he'll leave. We leverage it, or use it as punishment or reward. We act like we didn't want it and the man "convinced" us so we seem like good girls, we try to "turn him out" so we don't appear to be "boring".
        All I'm saying is I don't. But in no way am I saying I'm cheap or easy. I [total package] am worth the effort. I [total package] do not hand myself over lightly. My heart is my greatest gift. My time, my company, my strength, my support. I don't put that much stock in the physical stuff because I'll be damn*d if someone tells me I'm "used", or "off-market" because of it. I am priceless. My body is a bonus.
        My recent post Looks I’m Loving: The Jumpsuit!

        1. *waving my church fan*


          Let Him use you, Amaris!!!! LOL!

        1. Serious question- why do you believe that? Because "YOU", theoretically would be the one "spending"? Men try as hard as they can to get as much as they can with as little effort expended as possible from women all the time, would that be considered a "pimp" mentality? Why is it negative to you? I set requirements for who I chose to engage with, some women choose to set a price. It may be because they believe it is the only form of reciprocity they will get from that man, who knows? But does that make it wrong?
          My recent post Looks I’m Loving: The Jumpsuit!

        2. i never in my life had to pay for it because the women i got with actually liked me and we did what we did because of our mutual admiration for one another and not a "what can you do for me" … exchange/transactional mentality which is most definitely the mentality of a hooker/prostitute/call girl, etc. if you going to be a hooker then by all means be paid for your services. if you going to be a righteous stand-up type of person then you should not diminish your self worth to that level.
          My recent post VIDEO – THE TRUE HISTORY OF SLAVERY

  9. I think this is just "all in the game." Men want sex, women want more. They don't always get the "more" they want; so they charge for it because something is better than nothing.

  10. Doesn’t sound like a good investment. My time, money and effort for the cookies? When 9/10 i’ll be putting in all the work. If anything you should be paying me and taking me on nice dinners.

  11. I’d be kind of mad he put it to me that way. It’s a bit degrading but at the same time empowering. That you have something that someone is willing to put down their hard earned wealth for….that powerful feeling alone would almost turn me on for it.

  12. I've always loved these topics…. I'd do it, and I've done it before. Knowing what was being propositioned there's always that need to know about the what if. I took the chance and had some pretty awesome perks and some drama filled in with it, but that can happen at any one time. I mean, like it's been said before, at one point or another we're getting something out of sex. Propositions like these don't come to often either so it's something to really think about. At least it's an experience I can say that I've lived through and can't deny that at times I wish I would take some of the propositions being handed, but… that's a whole other story lol

  13. My cousin had an older sugar daddy once. He said it was bittersweet, but in the end the bills were PAID and then some. *shrugs*
    #TooEachTheirOwn just stay safe!

  14. have I "paid" for sex-I guess I have, not actual Cash for A$$ but Something of Value for the nani. I realize it is Life and "everything has a price" but Damn, MAYBE if Adam and Eve would have just listend to God about the Fruit on the Trees…….

    I'm Human, I'm a Man that's not So Macho and i got a 5 year old. i can't Do what I used to as a Teen and i don't Want to have to teach or tell my Daughter that in reality, for Love or Otherwise Sex will [one day] be Asked of/Required from her……..

  15. Can only do it if truly i lovs him,nd precise,lov witout money can 9va last long. ‘ve 9va dream 2 date/married a man who has an empty pocket,even d lucky man can’t smash me anyhow. Giv n u’ll receive,cz givers 9va lack…lol

  16. People have sex in exchange for stuff all time. If you are a single woman, I would hope that you aren't just giving the P away freely. The old saying, "I can do bad all by myself" comes into play. If you are with someone and they aren't "helping" you with the bills, etc. then you shouldn't be giving up the P. I mean, really, why end up with a wet ass and nothing to show for it?
    Now, I'm not saying that you have to be a prostitute but women have to know that their is power in the P. If used wisely, you can get what you want…IJS.
    My recent post “If A Hoe Is A Hoe And You Don’t Know…Is She Really A Hoe?”

    1. "why end up with a wet ass and nothing to show for it"

      Umm Good D!!?? sheesh women be ungrateful lol jk

      Seriously though, I can understand why you would feel this way, but man I just do not like this mentality. Like, i have to pay your bills to get some? lol Genuine interest from both ends just dont cut it huh lol

    2. Of course you don't like @uNk but women don't like the mindset that men don't have time for you if you ain't f*cking them. It is what it is. And the problem about mutual interest is, is that it doesn't always match both ways. And some parties are willing to put on like it's that deep just get what they want. The game cuts both ways.

  17. This is just crazy! I'm so glad I'm not a youngster ruled by my hormones anymore. I'm also glad that I have had adequate experience that I can't be persuaded solely on "my need to smash"! Two people should have sex solely because they want to. Sex is mostly a mutually beneficial activity between two (or more) parties. All this rationalizing about exchanges and minutia about what defines a prostitute is just malarkey. I'm all for keeping it real, so let's do that. if I have to do "favors" or "pay" just for sex then be up front and say so, don't expect love, concern, and care for your feelings if all you're offering is sex. Dang and we wonder why Black Love is on life support.

  18. on another note, Ladies who constantly refer to or advise against "freebies," That terminology implies that women don't have sex just because they want to or that they're even capable of doing so. So I wonder ladies is this really the case?

  19. Here's the irony of it: Some of these same women talking about basically pay for play are the same ones getting fake offended when a dude says that because he paid, it's time to play. I see men and women saying the same thing,but the fake outrage comes in when the other side is the one saying it instead of themselves. Both sides need to have several seats. It's really no different, but egos are producing the fake outrage.

    1. Exactly! Expecting "compensation" for your goods, but not expecting a demand for "service" after compensation= NOT A GOOD LOOK MA!!!

  20. I have two major desires of life that I feel makes it worth living: Love and Power, in that order. I'm the type do it for love which is free. But here lately in this dating climate it seems real stupid to just do it for free when dudes will empty their wallet for a stripper. I mean, I'd rather cry in a Maserati. Love seems to be on a real shortage so now I'm looking at power. You can find power in manipulating a person's desires (48 Laws of Power) and we all know money ain't far behind. Food for thought.



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