Im 31 weeks pregnant and i witnessed my long time family friend almost die today in my kitchen. Ive been stressed as it is through the entire pregnancy, but this really scared me. Any suggestions on ways to relax from this?

A few vodka gimlets always helps me relax.

Omaha, I won't go any farther than Omaha, NE. Omaha is about 470 miles from my home in Fontana, WI.

I got pantsed in 8th grade gym class and I liked it.

Underwear is overrated.

If you're in an accident there's a good chance you're going to soil your knickers anyways.

For some damn reason my photos always make me look like an albino Asian.

Why do you keep getting kicked off?

I'm voting for Trump just to piss you off.

Why would voting for Trump piss anyone off?

Burning coal for electricity is bad for the environment.

Atheists are not very bright people and should never hold office.

liberal = stupid
atheist = stupid

What you want your headstone to say?


He's a very popular man!

Bernie Sanders kinda reminds me of Goofy.

Image in content

Chuck Norris

Have you ever suffered from high self-esteem?

People see me as awesome so why shouldn't I?