The Astoundingly Good Case For Making A Ziggy Movie

"I see this as a summer tentpole movie, definitely." I'm laughing so hard it's coming out as a panting horse noise, because I just listened to this rapid-fire pitch for a Ziggy movie. There's everything: Why Wallace Shawn is the ideal actor for the role, how Ziggy could be the nature side of man vs. nature, why it should be live action instead of CGI, the role of the parrot as god, possible set pieces, the teaser trailer starting at the complaints department, the bonus scene after the credits. If you are still in your chair by the end of this routine, you are soulless.