
Comments on this blog (10) (moderated)
The World of Motorsport writes:
"NASCAR: Voyager"
Posted by Hinch27 on July 8, 2013
Viewed 342 times


It's time to address some issues that plague NASCAR at the tip top. There are many issues that are causing decreasing ratings, fan apathy, and more, but we shall address only those issues which can be fixed at the top of the ladder.

Let's number the issues:

(1) Brian France: he has mismanaged the series worse than any top-level sporting commissioner. This guy is as consistent in his decisions as the Kardashians. Solution: Lynch mobs are illegal, so just hope his divorce ends in his wife getting control of NASCAR

(2) Product Length: Yes, the races are too long, and too short. The reason NASCAR ran 500 miles was because of the attrition. Nowadays you have the same number of cars running after 600 miles at Charlotte as are left after a 50 lap race. That's not good. That's why people get bored. Why watch 4 hours to get the same result as watching for 1 hour can get you. There is something wrong when cars don't break down during the 24 Hours of Le Mans!!! Solution: mandate flimsier parts so that the odds of grenading an engine increase or just run 200 miles like every other series or even time the races.

(3) Brian France: I think I mentioned this.

(4) G-W-C: This is a biggie. For the fact, you the fan buy a ticket. That ticket says "Texas 500." Here's what that ticket means: you the fan are entitled to see a 500 mile race, barring rain. It does not guarantee you a green flag finish. Get that through your self-entitled head. Solution: either make caution flag laps not count (and wind up with 900 mile races) or just grow up and deal with the caution flag ending. Even better, if you still want a green flag finish, declare the leader at the end of the scheduled distance the winner and the winner of the G-W-C gets a $50,000 bonus without points.

(5) Brian France: I feel like I mentioned this before. I guess not.

(6) Scheduling arrangement: Sorry, but the best way to help this series is to have all three-series go through a shuffling. Cup, NNS, and CWTS all need to run on different tracks each weekend with only two exceptions, Daytona and Homestead. Why? It forces each series to form its own identity AND it gives each driver a chance to develop. If you want the Nationwide drivers to run against the Cup drivers, then look to part-time entries.

(7) Brian Jim France: the head of NASCAR Media... yeah, those morons.

P.S. I hope that worked.

(8) Anybody named France or Kennedy. These families should be banned from all racing events ever. Solution: defame them as Salem witches or something to get them out of circulation.

(9) The commercials: I am sorry, but I have a very young sibling. It is just completely wrong for there to be ads for movies and TV shows that are so violent they shouldn't exist in the first place on a program little kids watch. Same goes for alcohol. Logical... ban smoking, but not the MUCH MUCH deadlier booze, and then legalize the even more dangerous marijuana... brilliance of America. Solution: chew out the rears of the media outlets airing the races.

(10) Brian France: getting the picture?

(11) The competition: as much as people want to deny it, but NASCAR is actually at its lowest level of field wide competition in history. You are not going to look, see that the next race is Bristol Night, and wake up the morning after to go Racing-reference.info :) and find that J.J. Yeley legitimately passed Kasey Kahne for the win with 20 to go without rain, fuel, wrecks, tires, restrictor plates, or acts of God interfering. Yeah, there was attrition back in the day, but James Hylton and Lake Speed legitimately got numero uno. People love to discuss Hut Stricklin's dominating run in the 90+ degree heat at Darlington in 1996, but we NEVER see that happen anymore.

(12) Brian France: Sick of this yet?

(13) The cars: Too much moolah goes into these cars. It is literally cheaper to field an IndyCar nowadays.

(14) NASCAR: Enterprise, coming soon to blog post near you.
