Jun 17, 2010

Death: the only option?

Committing Suicide. 
Why bother when there is so much life has to offer? People cannot commit to relationships, to dentist appointments, to their child's parent-teacher meetings. But they can jump off a building, point a gun to their head, hang themselves or perhaps drink poison? What goes on in the mind of the individual who is ending his/her life, an act completely unfair to his friends and family who have done so much for his living.
*Moonlight Sonata playing in the background leading my train of thoughts in a particular direction*

You say you are depressed because of a certain problem in your life.But,
How could the person allow depression, a mental problem(in the initial stages) to become a physical problem? What can be so wrong to make a person THAT unhealthy mentally and physically. I have suffered personal losses also. I escaped it by going away to another state for further schooling. An escapist. But not suicidal. Could I have chosen the noose? Yes, I suppose. But I would have thought about how much it would affect my mother and sister after one loss already. Did I want to allow depression to rule my life? Honestly, sometimes it would feel like a safe bet. Wallowing in misery and self pity. But no good would come of that. Family members and friends have invested time and money in me in hope of me becoming 'someone' in life whom they can, with pride,say that they knew and had fond memories with.
How can one give their problem so much of an importance when they know that it is trivial as compared to other more genuine ones? 
A few things to be noted here: 
If you feel that there is a problem,be it small or big, try and resolve it on your own. Stop blaming others. If you need help, ask for it. There is nothing wrong with seeking help from near or dear ones or perhaps, even a complete stranger. Humanity is not dead, yet.

You must realize that there are many people with the same 'problem' as you, others who have also incurred personal or even financial losses, others who are just like you but for whom the intensity of the problem may have been slightly more or less. Stop in your tracks, count your blessings for what you have at least rather than cribbing about what you may never have, and then press the 'play' button in your life again.

I'm going to reiterate the fact that your problem will seem petty if you compare it to say, the problem of poverty, of sex trafficking, of water shortage. Your actions should justify your words. If you cannot act up on your yet, don't speak. But start thinking about these things at least. Someone once rightly said: Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.” A temporary problem that CAN be resolved!
Ask yourself these questions: 
How different ARE you from others? Is your problem that grave that there can never be a solution? Can you reflect back on life and not find even one instance where you were just happy and use that to keep you going in search of more instances like that? 
What's it going to be?
I don't know how far it is justified that I of all people am writing all this. But even if it doesn't apply completely, a discussion with some people over lunch made me start thinking on these lines. And writing about it is helping me get a slightly clearer picture of the concept of 'suicide' in my mind. Still a lot more reading and discussing needs to go into this and it will. 


chandani said...

i completely agree with you.
but remember what AS once said?
he said," if you nick yourself while shaving, that will cause you more pain than if a thousand people die in an earthquake."
my point here is, everybody finds their pain more unbearable than the other persons. however grave their problems maybe.
and though there are problems such as human trafficking, as long as they are not in front of you, you will not care.
such is human nature.

urvika said...

brilliantly written
i completely agree with all wht u have written
really good wrk
u have explored the subject really well
its a vast topic tht u have put in a nutshell and tht too superbly
keep up the good wrk chotti ;)

Kichu said...

i totally agree........i mean i went thru 1 of the worst times of my life lasy year where it seemed that its a dead end...but i chose to fight and i survived till date....u need not be physically strong to survive or fight, all u need is a big heart...thats how u survive ur bad time and win

Ayesha said...

There is a lot of truth in what you have said. Putting your problems in perspective to the bigger picture helps. Because there are others who have dealt with more and worse.

But yes, more discussion and more research is required :) because it is never just a unidimensional problem. Never.

Anonymous said...

You raise important points, but you're being rather presumptuous throughout the post. How can he who lives at the equator, see the sun at midnight, unless he visits the northern lands?

Akanksha Arya said...

Points taken.
But sometimes 'enough is enough'. There is no longing to live, there is no mountains to cross and there is more personal suffering that is ever imaginable. What Chandani said is true, out of sight out if mind. There are reasons and I am hoping you look into them. :)
State of the mind, they say.

I'd like to know, why do you think euthanasia is made legal in some countries - or so I have heard? Is it right wrong. Etc.

Amit upadhyaya said...

the fight is never about living a little more or in better condition, it is always about defeating that one person/thing/situation which puts you through all that.....

it is about that human spirit which says 'never say never'

there will always be contrasting experiences in others' life, what matters is how you PERCEIVE them in YOUR situation!

g2 said...

As a person who has been very depressed in life (not suicidal), I must say, I understand if someone wants to kill themselves, although I would never approve of it!

Pallav said...

having flirted with depression and been border suicidal for a good 5 years, i know what you are saying..
you know some people are just wired that ways - wired to be depressed. some people might be unhappy because of situation etc.. and its a choice. either way,

either way, suicide is difficult to explain, esp for a third person. but someone who does it, just imagine what must have he gone through to flip this desire to live.

but mostly, it is as simple as nothing to live for, no one to live with.

i guess true love could save such souls - true love for someone or some passion...

my two words...

btw you write really well.. cheers!!!

Anonymous said...

There are times though when there truly is no hope left whatsoever of ever improving your situation. When there is no hope left, life cannot continue. I hear people say 'so long as there is life there is hope', but it's really the other way around, 'so long as there is hope there is life'. In the absence of there ever being even the most minute amount of hope and happiness, love and affection, that is not a life worth living at all, that is just a wasted life and not one I would wish upon my worst enemies. In that situation, when someone is in that much pain with zero hope of it ever getting better (because it realy doesn't get better, 41 years of life have taught me that), why would anyone even be capable of continuing that life. If you knew that someone was in constant pain and that only death could bring them any relief, even if it was someone you dearly love, why would you want them to continue to live knowing that at best their life will be nothing but pain, loneliness, heartbreak?