Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Fuck friendship when we could be fucking right now

Most of my blog posts are about me, but this one is dedicated to and about a close male friend who would rather not be named. This is a story about love.

This guy falls for one of his friends, and decides to burn her some mix CDs to declare his affections. So there he is, outside her apartment with a gift bag he bought with some CDs that more or less spell out "I love you". He ties up the gift bag nicely and folds it rather flat so it'll fit in her mail box. The gift bag has a teddy bear printed on it, and it's really girly. He thinks she'll like it.

He takes a deep breath. He walks towards her apartment and find the mail boxes... it's behind a giant security gate and he can't get in. A little disappointed that he can't declare his love for this girl, he gets back in his car. He glances at the gift bag and notices the words printed on the side of the gift bag.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Not a virgin, not yet a slut

Interesting fact about my Anglican private girls boarding school. When we were in Grade Eleven, we had our debutante ball. Except the religious people in the school board prohibited us from wearing white because they said we were all dirty sluts. And the father's club who funded the event didn't want us wearing black because it was too sexual. So we pretty much were only allowed to wear any colour but white and black (let's not go into the whole physics/art debate of whether they are colours). And they changed it to "Presentation Ball" because they said there was no point debuting us to society since we'd been whoring ourselves out at parties for a few years.

Safe to say, I didn't go.