Archive for the ‘tantrism’ Category


The Tarot Trumps symbolize the inner journey that one must take to go back to the “Source”. In this case it represents the symbolic inner journey as we discover the male and female within our own inner natures and develop our spiritual or astral bodies. Each card represents a definite stage of progress on this return journey. They must all be taken in the correct sequence. Each card is therefore an initiation of sorts.

The Trump cards are superior to the Suit cards and represent more universal experiences that will occur in each of the suits. This means that each Trump is true for every type of energy, abstract/spiritual, mental, emotional, and sexual/physical. There are indeed four separate cycles that involve these individual energies as we gradually grow in our spiritual evolution.

For me this return process is really the joining together of true soulmates in a physical relationship. This at least is the ultimate goal. I choose to interpret the Trumps as the various stages in this process which I call the “Soulmate Cycle”.

The concept of soulmates is a difficult one. By it I mean someone whose foundation energy frequency is the same as your own. As people are always growing these foundation frequencies may slowly change. In fact, I believe that every new Eon requires that new “soulmate” pairs be created and the old ones be relinquished. Each person is responsible for their own entry into the New Eon and it will always follow the pattern symbolized by the Tarot Trumps. Thus at any given time different people are traveling the same path independently of each other. Also each of us must experience a physical marriage or sexual relationship to a “collective” soulmate before we can meet our individual soulmate. This collective soulmate represents the interests of humanity and we must through this person fulfill our obligations to humanity before we can achieve to more personal goals.

I have personally traveled through this “Soulmate” cycle at least nine times now and am currently halfway through another cycle so I feel that I understand it to a degree. I have gone through a cycle for the element FIRE and the suit of KEYS, the element WATER and the suit of CUPS, the element AIR and the suit of SWORDS, and now lastly the element EARTH and the suit of LOCKS.

Each new cycle was a replica of the one before it but on a lower and more restrictive level.

The first cycle involved the completion of my personal paradigm or view of reality. It was very abstract and involved visions of the far future and the far past. It also involved humanity’s future interaction with other life forms such as UFO’s. I was given to understand that humanity will not mix with these other life forms in this new Eon, but in the next Eon. In that Eon humanity will eventually merge with those races to become more than human.

The second cycle expressed these same things in less abstract form as a mental simplification of the basic concepts. This cycle also involved global events and political turmoil. It saw the fall of the Berlin Wall, the Gulf War, and major earthquakes around the world.

The third cycle dealt with personal and private issues such as employment and sexual responsibility. It also dealt with very savage astral conflicts as my intentions conflicted with others on the astral planes and two years of struggles ensued. I learned the need to defend myself astrally and also learned how to fight for what I believe in. This was difficult because I was by nature a very passive person that would rather give in to others than create problems. It was during this cycle that I finally decided to try to achieve the future that I felt was waiting for me in the astral. I left my job and security to pursue that dream and landed in a big pile of trouble.

The fourth cycle began when I was struggling to achieve my personal dream physically against tremendous opposition. This opposition was an important part of the entire process. It seems that to physically achieve your spiritual goals, you must give society a means to crucify you. You must incur the wrath of the collective before you can break out of your current life conditions. After fighting the collective to a standstill, you then attempt to smooth things over but on a higher level with you in a more advantageous position. You must fill your obligations to society that were created in your marriage or sexual relationship with your collective soulmate. This happened in the cycle described by the suit cards. At least this happened for the male. The female soulmate for this cycle must still experience this marriage to the collective.

The end of each cycle did not bring me a physical relationship with my “soulmate” but instead brought a new cycle. I don’t know how many cycles there are! Each cycle brought me a different “soulmate” to work with. In most cases I have had only a Platonic relationship with the women involved. The activity has been mainly astral activity and where possible verified as happening to the other person as well.

One thing seems certain about this cycle. It develops all of the astral bodies of both individuals and gives them great power within the astral. I think there is a difference between the experiences described in the suit cards and those of this cycle because the suit cards reflect normal and everyday interactions with the opposite sex and describes collective experiences shared by almost everyone. The experiences described in the Trump cards only begin after the mystic or magician has crossed the Great Abyss in full awareness and has attained the grade of Magister Templi. I believe it is possible to attain this grade through the method described in the OAK Energy Ball Meditations. This crossing of the Great Abyss connects one to opposite sex energy that is God/dess energy. I think that the suit cards reflect the stages of personal growth up to the stages of crossing the Great Abyss and the grade of Magister Templi. I believe that the experiences described in the Trump cards reflect the stages of the grades Magister Templi and Magus. I also believe that these events in the “soulmate” cycle are largely beyond personal control and fall under cosmic law instead, especially as it begins with a personal connection to God/dess.

This connection to God/dess energy replaces the opposite sex energy that you are currently using and results in the breakup of that relationship. It also establishes a connection to the lunar and solar cycles that acts to further develop the body of light that has been formed in the crossing of the Great Abyss. The process seems fairly mechanical from that point onward. It establishes a cosmic circuit that goes around the entire universe and encircles it.

Also these soulmate cycles have two parts that basically repeat each other with some minor differences. First the entire cycle is gone through with “spiritual” energy and creates astral bodies and astral futures. At the completion of the spiritual cycle it seems to start all over using etheric energies instead and creates etheric bodies and etheric futures. I am currently in the etheric portion of the EARTH cycle which means that I’ve experienced versions of this cycle over nine times now.

In conclusion I wish to say that these cycles are phenomenon that are perfectly natural and mechanical in nature based entirely upon the intensity and the amount of effort an individual puts into his or her life. Very small effort will show very small progress in these cycles. Very large effort will at some point impinge upon the collective future of humanity and encounter resistance. Surplus energies will at that point flow into the collective and be distributed among others. The completion of the cycle being established as a specific moment in time and not one minute sooner.

It seems the cycle involves at least three people and the collective of humanity as soulmates. In the suit cards we learned to experience any one of the opposite sex as our soulmate. In this cycle we experience very specific individuals that we do not choose. They are chosen for us as contact is made within our dreams long before we meet them. As a mystic of the grade Magister Templi I tap into that part of myself that is both male and female, that part that is HUMANITY. From that part of myself I seek opposite sex energy or female energy. In my dreams contact is made with a real physical female person and I get energy from her. She is for the duration of the cycle my “soulmate” in the truest sense of the term. The third person in the cycle is another male. He also is a soulmate of mine and of the female. But he is the exact opposite of what she is, the two of them combined create a complete unit.

Forming a triad he represents the male force and she the female force while I represent the combination of male/female through the act of going within for my female energy. He is of the old egregore and represents the collective of humanity and I am of a new egregore. This is the time of changing to more appropriate soulmates. He must give up his connection to her so that I may create a new connection to her. The collective is the fourth soulmate in this cycle because at the deepest level we are all a part of everyone else and it only appears that we are separate. As a Magister Templi we have already been married to the collective. The female’s relationship to the third person is her marriage to the collective which is just beginning to happen.

My experiences have always been of the two males and one female variety but it stands to reason that there must be similar cycles involving triads of two females and one male. I share these things because I believe them to be general principles that have always existed in the process of spiritual development. I have followed the mystic path before following the magical path and suspect this may be a factor in the type of experience a person has. The magician turned mystic may have a different type of experience. Because of this it seems that any experience may be either a male or a female experience depending on whether one follows a mystical or magical path. I can only try to share from my personal experiences and let others sort it out as it applies in their own circumstances.

A final clarification must be made about astral energy, its creation and uses as well as the development of astral bodies. As mentioned in previous posts I believe that all astral energy must be created and generated through the physical body and injected into the astral perhaps as dreams or with practice directly injected.

A male body can only generate male energy and a female body can only generate female energy. Male astral energy is uncontrollable, expansive and destructive in nature. It can destroy astral objects. Female astral energy is restrictive and containing in nature. It can create barriers and encircle harmful things to make them ineffective.

Only a perfect mix of 50% male astral energy and 50% female astral energy is malleable and capable of forming astral bodies or various astral creations. The collective is one form of this type of energy that is very powerful. The most powerful type is that created during the “Soulmate” cycle when the new “soulmate” pair is established and their energy Phase-locks together in an unbreakable unit capable of creating a new life for each of them.

This concludes the introduction to the “Soulmate” cycle symbolized by the Tarot trumps. A cycle that is as old as time itself. The stages are as I have personally experienced them, meaning from the perspective of a two male and one female triad.

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Ten of Pentacles

Symbol-sexual union with no barriers


This is total understanding put into perfect action. This is a perfect union of both pleasure and pain. This is love without barriers, joy without bounds, and a world without limits.


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Nine of Pentacles

Symbol-Death as a beautiful being flying toward the light.

Meaning- He gives her the key

This is the beginning of the enthronement process as they are recognized and honored by others for their attainments. For the first time life is truly smiling on them. Even the hard things propel them onward in the right direction.

All restrictions and injuries have been lifted up into the Christ Light to become Holy. All sins and darkness remain as transfigured blessings and proofs of this true attainment.

Together as a couple they look forward toward a deep and fulfilling life of Mastery. A life that contains all things. A life that explores all that needs to be explored.
This is the first step in their life of service to others. They are truly a family.

This will be a life born of true compromise where nothing is lost or given up. If one of them wishes to experience a certain type of life they both will experience it together. They will overcome all obstacles and differences between them in time.

They have experienced the love that each holds for the other and the love they have for themselves as well. They like who they are as a couple and as individuals.

They know that within each of them lives a dangerous being capable of unimaginable cruelty and violence. They know at times they will hurt each other and hurt others swiftly and without remorse. When this happens they will accept the pain and cruelty as an echo and reflection of what is within themselves and rejoice in the strength and will to survive that flows within both of them and within the entire human race.

They can do this because they know it is also possible to rise above the animal and to be divine. This is what it truly is to be human, to be a divine animal above all other
animals and to have a mate as strong as yourself. They have discovered the power of tough love within themselves and within each other.


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Eight of Pentacles

SYMBOL-They lock together as life and death combined
Meaning- Join Forces

This joining of forces is a difficult thing for her because she is generating low level physical energy that brings all of her past injuries and fears into awareness. Does she want to relive these old experiences with him? Does she have to?

The dark side of her personality has joined with the dark side of his personality. Is this a good thing?

Slowly she realizes that the light side of their personalities have joined together also. The future holds the promise of both good and bad things happening to each of them. This is the awareness of the bittersweet qualities that all true relationships must share.

He has no intention of experiencing the dark side of life with her. It is troublesome that she wants to experience things he would rather forget. This makes her a little less attractive to him and he is finally able to see she is very different from what he thought she was.

In fact, she is almost the opposite of what he had thought she would be like. To him it seems she likes the pain life has to offer and that really scares him. He is not really into pain as much as he is into living in his head. He must learn to appreciate the bitter-sweet in life. He must learn to live in the present moment and not run away from responsibility.

Male experience:

He is disturbed at the intensity with which she lives life. She is not afraid to experience pain or unpleasant events and even seems to get a perverse pleasure from them. This is not at all like the living in his head that he is used too. The prospect of such intense earthy experiences is frightening to him. Staying so long in the present moment is almost more than he can bear. This is an entirely new insight into who she is. He must learn to accept the bitter-sweet in life and accept his responsibilities.


It is difficult for her to imagine a life full to the brim with happiness and joy. Instead, the emptiness and pain within her yearn for expression as well and she is surprised that her emptiness and pain are an important part of who she is. Her children mean everything to her. It is important to be alone at times and important to truly and deeply feel one’s pain and sorrow. It is important to drink deeply from life’s cup. The deepest things in life are bitter-sweet.

She might not have a life of her own but she can live through the life of her children.


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We all want to be loved for who we really are inside and we want to love someone else with the same intensity or do we? Often our fear of getting to know someone else too deeply ruins our chances and truly rewarding relationships. What is more important, our mask or being vulnerable enough to really share ourselves with someone else?

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Sexual Energy Vampires

Sexual Power and Spiritual Power

Sexual Alchemy Is Normal

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Magical Egregores

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Seven of Pentacles

Symbol-She discovers him in bed with another woman.
Meaning- loss of innocence

As a couple they combine their energy of love and light and pour it out into the entire world. They proclaim their combined desires and wills throughout the entire Spirit planes. This is a mingling of bitter-sweet as each shares the pains and sorrows of the other.
She is now taking his lower level sexual and physical energy and using it to create the physical reality that she wants out of life. It soon is apparent that the relationship has serious problems.

They are both very different persons and want very different things out of life. He resists doing what she wants and she resists doing what he wants. The relationship turns into a massive power struggle that can have no winner.

There are some things that they each consider sacred and they will not part with those cherished dreams. Those dreams are not compatible with each other.

Since they both are freely generating all types of astral energy two separate versions of the future are generated, his and hers. As more and more energy is poured into these potential futures the power struggle becomes more and more intense. Neither one is satisfied with the relationship but neither one wants to leave it.

Ultimately, more suitable partners are drawn into their lives by the very intensity of their desires and the accumulation of energy within each created astral future. Affairs and separation are the result. At the very least they know they must separate and it is devastating for both of them.

He plunges into an abyss trying to find another source of female energy. At the same time he is trying to deal with the hostile energy she is sending toward him. She has been his only source of female sexual and physical energy, but now it is hostile energy and he has real difficulty trying to neutralize it. He is not sexually attracted to her any more.

He is trying to escape from her reality completely but is still dependent upon her for sexual and physical energy. There is probably a temporary separation.

She is sucked into an uncontrollable vortex and lost in terror and despair. She has been used. She gave the relationship everything she had and he deserted her. He is not interested in her any more.

It is only after she loses him she realizes how much he really means to her. It is a terrible thing not to be able to live with someone or to live without them. In all this the family suffers if they have children together.

Male experience:

The relationship is not working out and he is not at all satisfied. He is ready to look for someone outside the relationship to fulfill his needs. A separation is inevitable and brings a feeling of intense relief. It may be temporary or permanent. They need to think about the children.

Female experience:

She doesn’t realize how much she loves him until it is too late and he is gone. There is nothing but a huge gaping wound in her life where he once had been. She knows they were not good for each other but he was all she ever had. Having something is better than the loneliness and emptiness she is now experiencing. They need to think about the children.

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Six of Pentacles

symbol– He uses her energy to do things that he wants to
do. She gets him to do things for her. They have a child.
Meaning- exploitation

They are both generating high and low level sexual and physical energy at this point. She is able to generate an abundance of high level energy and combines it with his high level sexual energy. They encourage each other in their physical effort to achieve the things in life that are important. This combined physical energy is used to create physically the type of life that she wants for them both.

They have begun the process of creating a family together. The birth of a child brings new joys, responsibilities and sorrows. It is more than either one expected it to be.

The effect of this is that she gains control of the relationship and gets him to do things for her that she wants done. Everything must be done the way that she wants it and all that he says is “Yes dear!”

Even though she is becoming dominant at home he is still able to do the things that he wants to do when he is away from her. He is able to find time for his own interests too. In this way the relationship is a workable one in which each partner is using the other to fulfill their own physical needs.

The relationship does not meet their highest expectations and many compromises must be made but they do learn to love and respect each other in their own ways. They learn to become a family.

Male experience:

He learns to compromise with her and in general is content with the relationship. It becomes comfortable to be in. She demands things of him but he is also able to do many of the things that he wants to do. He learns about being a father.

Female experience:

She tries hard to make their life the type of one that she dreams of. It doesn’t really work out that way but things are not all that bad either. There is a steady progress that is being made. Being a mother changes her life in radical ways that she could never have imagined before.

If she could only get him to really try to do the things that she wants things would work out perfectly. He seems content to waste his time on things that are unimportant to her and even may try getting out of doing things that she asks of him.


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