Thursday, March 8, 2012

Out With The In-Laws

Mamakat's prompt:  5.) Describe what it was like meeting your in-laws for the first time?

Larry and I were about to move in together, and it was time for me to meet his parents.  I wanted to make a good impression, of course, and I imagine that they felt the same.  Larry's parents looked a lot older than my parents; his mother appeared particularly frail.  She did all the talking for herself and her husband, but both seemed pleasant and friendly.   We chatted as we buckled our seat belts and drove to the restaurant to eat.

In San Antonio, if you are not at a table in a restaurant before five on a Friday night, you plan on waiting in line.  We got a late start, so it was after five, and we were told that we would have about a thirty minute wait.  Larry and I were used to such waiting, but his mother felt that the line was too long; she would not be able to wait that long to eat.  We decided to try another restaurant just up the road, and we all piled into the car and fought the rush hour traffic for about twenty minutes to get there. 

We were told there would be at least a forty-five minute wait for a table.

"I guess we should have stayed at the other place," Larry's mother said. 

Under normal circumstances, Larry and I would have made sarcastic comments, but we were both on our best behavior. Since his mother was the one who could not wait too long to eat, the rest of us were willing to defer to her wishes.   Did she want to wait for a table at this restaurant, we queried, or did she want to go somewhere else? 

She didn't know what she wanted to do, she told us.  Every restaurant would have a line, she said.  She did not want to eat somewhere that would upset her stomach.  She normally brought crackers with her, she told me, but she had forgotten to replace them from the last time.  She had a delicate tummy, she said.  Larry's mother chattered for some time, like one of those bossy squirrels guarding their tree in the park.  We waited for her to decide, becoming more irritated as our blood sugar levels fell.  I felt myself on the brink of saying something sarcastic, and likely hurtful.

I finally pulled Larry aside and suggested strongly that we all go to a Mexican fast food place close by.  There would be no line, and we could eat instead of just talking about eating.  It was a win-win, as far as I was concerned.  Larry agreed with me, as did his father.  After a few moments agonizing about what a bad impression she was probably making, we were able to get into the car.  Five minutes later, we were at Taco Cabana, our food sitting in front of us, and we were digging in.  Except for Larry's mother, who was still trying to explain her 'tummy troubles' in detail. I was shocked when she brought up the 'C' word at the dinner table. 'C' as in 'colon'.  I wasn't really sure what my response to all this should be.   I took my cue from my future husband and future father-in-law and tried to ignore most of what she said.  I would have been too grossed out to eat, otherwise. 

I was feeling magnanimous as we went our separate ways for the evening.  I wasn't sure that I wanted to go out to eat with my future in-laws again, but I was still in love.   


  1. Holy crap. Pun intended.

    You might be a saint for not blowing up at her.

  2. People really should try to filter their mouths more than usual when they're eating with others. But, really, in want context or setting do we ever want to hear, in detail, about someone's tummy issues?

  3. We can pick our spouses and our friends. We can't We're born into them or we inherit. Hmmmmm.

  4. Whoa! That's a REAL true love test!!! But some dramas turn out to be secret 'in-law' tests to see if you're up to the challenge.

    Sadly, sometimes they don't realise they're providing these tests...

