whytakemyusername 3388 points3389 points 1 month ago

Man when I was a kid boys will be boys meant schoolyard fights, daring each other to eat dirt and doing generally stupid things without realizing the danger upon your own life. Boys will be boys never meant raping someone or anything that harmed anyone else.

AnotherGit 654 points655 points 1 month ago

Thanks. I was so enraged when I read that headline. First, how can they be so disgusting and abuse kids like that and second how can someone see such disgusting actions and describe it as "boys will be boys"? Wtf, these are rapists and not boys.

Anna_Kate 584 points585 points 1 month ago

It isn't 'boys will be boys', anyway. It's 'footballers will be footballers'. They get protected because they bring prestige.

If it had been the school's Dungeons & Dragons club that did this - the creepy weirdos? Bet that would have been a different story altogether.

MindyLouHoo 122 points123 points 1 month ago

So prestigious that the school and town demanded to protect them. Not the victim, or the hacker who helped bring them down - he’s serving two years in prison for this.

Help_An_Irishman 39 points40 points 1 month ago

The hacker is serving two years? Do you know how he was caught?

RLucas3000 17 points18 points 1 month ago

Did the rapists get no penalty? They will probably be on the Supreme Court some day.

RedditIsAntiScience 10 points11 points 1 month ago

And people think im just being edgy when i make fun of the obsession with sportsball

yungvogel 160 points161 points 1 month ago

I can’t imagine being a full grown adult and caring SO much about such a trivial thing like high school football, disgusting.

ktek01 106 points107 points 1 month ago

When your life is so pathetic you are willing to overlook rape for a team, you should re-think your life. What a crap town.

ashley_the_otter 30 points31 points 1 month ago

We were watching a video at work that was supposed to be like a weekly radio show. It had maybe 6 people who worked at our company and it had them go around and talk about themselves. One guy only talked about his obsession with this one highschool football team. He didnt have kids and didnt ever go to that highschool. He made no mention of relatives or anyone he knew playing. My team and I all thought it was a bit strange.

Maxpowr9 17 points18 points 1 month ago

The sad reality is, a lot of people peaked in high school.

EmbraceTheDepth 2 points3 points 1 month ago

Its Steubenville.

Euwana_Phoukmibhouti 1 point2 points 1 month ago

This is the best thing they have going for them. That says a lot.

Evilsj 0 points1 point 28 days ago

Fucking seriously. I get it with professional sports (NBA, NFL, MLB etc) since those are watching the cream of the crop play at the top level, but local kids playing... I mean maybe you're tying to convince yourself that in the very small chance your town has someone go on and become a star player you can say "I was there since the beginning" but outside of that, it's fucking weird.

SpaceCricket -1 points0 points 1 month ago

I’m assuming you can’t imagine that because you don’t have children? It’s ridiculous and asanine, but to say you can’t understand why a parent would want the best for their children (albeit way overzealous) says a lot. Most things kids care about are trivial to adults.

RingosTurdFace 59 points60 points 1 month ago


But then also Look at the stories of Brian Banks, Malik St. Hilaire or Shawn Oakman.

stabthecynic -3 points-2 points 1 month ago


joleme 17 points18 points 1 month ago

DM: Roll initiative!!


DM: Okay you can make the first move.

Uh... um... I've never spoken to a girl before I don't know what to do!

DM: she looks bored already so she polymorphs back into a red dragon and eata you whole.


Game_of_Jobrones 12 points13 points 1 month ago

Honestly it would serve them right, even third level illusion would have protected them from being identified. It’s like they wanted to get caught.

Sly442 1 point2 points 1 month ago

You're lucky you didn't say this on Twitter

dbadefense1990 2 points3 points 1 month ago

If this were members of the basketball team, the town would’ve wanted execution of the rapists and called over the local Klan chapter for backup.

[deleted] -29 points-28 points 1 month ago


FatboyJack 22 points23 points 1 month ago

for all i know we can just call them rapists ok?

jenni451 15 points16 points 1 month ago


dansedemorte -2 points-1 points 1 month ago

Yeah, pretty much rood piping violent rapists for the most part. There's a few good boys that try to spoil the mood but eventually they get kicked out.

LakehavenAlpha -1 points0 points 1 month ago

I play D&D and I'm neither creepy nor weird.

AntisocTeknoweenie -2 points-1 points 1 month ago

Found the incel. What you want brownie points for not raping people in your d&d club?

Fredact -7 points-6 points 1 month ago

Its that “football players are gods” mentality that produces the Colin Kaepernick’s and Antonio Brown’s that think the world revolves around them and they should be beyond punishment.

RLucas3000 6 points7 points 1 month ago

I don’t recall Colin raping anyone. Just quietly protesting the killing of innocent black people by police officers.

ThunderGirlACS 0 points1 point 1 month ago

Colin Kaepernick’s only “crime” is that he dared to think that he could use the fact he played football on a national stage as a platform to say the fact that blacks are disproportionately shot and killed by police at an alarming rate. It was suggested to him by a teammate that’s a veteran that rather than sitting on the bench he should kneel. Antonio Brown’s “crime” is that he is extremely talented and thinks that he deserves to have every demand fulfilled.

SafeQueen 11 points12 points 1 month ago

they love their football...

TerryTitts -2 points-1 points 1 month ago

Alright so before I give any time to this doc did the girl actually get raped and they have solid proof of that or is this some more #metoo bullshit?

FUTURE10S 359 points360 points 1 month ago

There's a video of boys jumping over another boy spinning in a circle by laying down on a hoverboard, like it's jump rope. THAT'S "boys will be boys". Or sliding down a pool slide backwards just because it's fun, boys will be boys.

theguyfromgermany 357 points358 points 1 month ago

Edit: to clarify, the following few lines are a satire based on toxic boys will be boys culture and is only tangentialy releated with the documentary. I was replying to the comments above me.

What? You guys didnt corner girls, take them into the locker room, then proceed to take off their cloths while they are kicking and crying? Hold their legs and hands with 4-5 friends then take turns stuffing your penis in them while they are clearly in shock?

By the time the second and third friend has a go, they are limp and bruised.

Then you threathen to kill them if they say anything.

At home you eat your dinner with your family and joke about sports.

How was your day at school? Ahh the usual boring stuff you know.

And then next month when she come to school again and you meet her on the hallway you say:

Hey Clair! We missed you! Where were you last week before practice? She runs away crying.

Ahhhaha high five boys! God damn I'm horny, should we see what Jessica is up to?


ForeignNails 197 points198 points 1 month ago


By the time the first friend has a go, they're already hurt.

People often underestimate how much rape actually hurts. The vagina needs time to grow and get aroused before penetration. It burns because of the friction and you feel like you're getting your whole stomach kicked from the inside, but it's actually your cervix. Also, you start bleeding because you get cuts from so much friction. And it's not like it gets better. It gets worse, now you're getting punched all over your cuts. It's extremely painful.

MeowMyOvaries 122 points123 points 1 month ago

I’m sorry you know that

goombah111 -5 points-4 points 1 month ago


Yeah, hurt. He said "limp and bruised". If the sex has that much friction then the guy wont enjoy it either. Im sure some rapists use spit or lube. For themselves of course.

Be_nice_boy 22 points23 points 1 month ago

Fuck I wish I never read this. What happened to the perpetrators?

ErictheRedding 11 points12 points 1 month ago

None of that happened. What happened is bad enough without people making shit up.

ErictheRedding 6 points7 points 1 month ago

Just so ppl know, none of the above is even alleged to have happened in the Steubenville case.

FUTURE10S 2 points3 points 1 month ago

Considering this isn't from the documentary, it sounds like you may have your own trauma issues, and I'm sorry to hear that happened.

And even if it didn't, something like this definitely happened to people in the past. Those are people that need justice.

theguyfromgermany 0 points1 point 1 month ago

Dont worry. Never happened to me.

Ive been on several sports teams (hockey/football/soccer) and i hate how male culture works in those circles

Khmer_Orange 44 points45 points 1 month ago

This is America

Fredact -6 points-5 points 1 month ago

If you think this is a bigger problem in America than in most of the rest of the world, you are very very naive.

Frank_Sincatra -59 points-58 points 1 month ago

more like this is india

Sly442 -8 points-7 points 1 month ago

This is boys

ipoooppancakes 1 point2 points 1 month ago

It's sad you need to preface this with a warning and also using the /s tag

xikarizfeg 0 points1 point 1 month ago

I don't really see the issue with having a little fun. Calm down pussy.

theguyfromgermany 0 points1 point 1 month ago

Go back to playing with your barbies.

Nmerhi 0 points1 point 1 month ago

This! This is the type of narrative we need! It hurt me read this. News stories always gloss over rape.

lalauniverse 48 points49 points 1 month ago

Ever seen the video of the three teenage boys standing outside in a rainstorm cheering as the cars drive by and drench them in water? That's another good example of boys will be boys.

GucciJesus 15 points16 points 1 month ago

Nah, that's gods will be gods.

PiperBaels 7 points8 points 1 month ago

Perfect teen shit

FUTURE10S 0 points1 point 1 month ago

No, but that 100% sounds like a thing I'd do if I was bored as hell.

Summerlongsleeeves 144 points145 points 1 month ago

pretty much.

Banecn 104 points105 points 1 month ago

My father would have beat the hell out of me then held me while the girls father did the same thing. Then turned me over to the cops all because he knew that I already knew better than to do something like that.

BeardsuptheWazoo -57 points-56 points 1 month ago

You got a little fucking crazy here. Jeez.

steve_gus 44 points45 points 1 month ago

It seems a fair response to me. Ever been gang raped?

stop_stopping 54 points55 points 1 month ago

he just described something less brutal than rape..

Tonydragon784 11 points12 points 1 month ago

Not in the slightest.

Banecn 0 points1 point 1 month ago

Wow people on the internet are freaking brutal. Glad I read the entire thread. Not that it will help, but you have my up votes.

gelinrefira 307 points308 points 1 month ago

The way I see it is that there is an entire town or even generation of adults in America that literally does not have the moral capacity to determine basic right and wrong.

It has nothing to do with boys will be boys mentality. It simply has to do with the ability to judge an issue's ethical and moral position and this town adults simply cannot do it. They are so selfish that they cannot see beyond their collective desires to win amateur football games over one of the most heinous crime that could be committed.

If you think about its implications, it is chilling and not so surprising to see that why people like trump and the gop can get elected. There are people in America that are that selfish that their desires outweighs the entirety of the country's well being. And I am 100% sure that I'm gonna get flamed for this comment because it seem that the freedom to truly do some stupid and unethical thing is more important than anything else.

I have visited many countries and interacted with many people but one of the two countries where latent selfishness is celebrated as a virtue is America. The other one is China.

EphemeralApricity 119 points120 points 1 month ago

latent selfishness is celebrated as a virtue

This is incredibly spot on. But then these same people are quick to anger at the injustice of it all when they're the ones who are suffering.

It's such a weird combination of rugged individualism and learned helplessness.

Theygonnabanme 46 points47 points 1 month ago

Learned helplessness is a core feature of abrahamic religions.

funkengruven 9 points10 points 1 month ago

Can you elaborate on that point?

editorgolden 10 points11 points 1 month ago

this guy gets it

mrs_ouchi 59 points60 points 1 month ago

true! Thats also why healthcare for everyone paid through taxes or proper maternity leave seems crazy to some people - "why would I pay for other people" .. I dont know if America will ever be able to rid of this selfishness

TootsNYC 40 points41 points 1 month ago

Yeah, Americans are incredibly selfish. I actually sort of dread taxpayer-funded health insurance because people will just start harassing every fat person in McDonald’s. Meanwhile those of us with insurance pay for other people’s neglect of their health anyway, through our premiums. Apparently we don’t object to that as long as some company is getting a profit

mrs_ouchi 7 points8 points 1 month ago

yeah I guess people dont see the bigger picture.. as always. The sad thing is, like you said, the only ones winning (regarding pretty much every topic out there) are the companies. But hey its all about "freedom"

crashddr 3 points4 points 1 month ago

I don't know what the numbers are, but I really want a counter point to when I hear people talk about how expensive a universal healthcare system would be under someone like Bernie. My immediate thought is that we must already be paying an exorbitant amount when you combine employer contributions, premiums, copays, deductibles, and all the stuff that gets denied. If anything, I would expect (or at least hope) that if people can go to the doctor for routine checkups and advice then maybe we would avoid some emergency expenses.

euphonious_munk 47 points48 points 1 month ago

Too many Americans, especially in rural areas, think their small town, milquetoast ways are what America is.
And it doesn't help that our presidential candidates spend months crawling into every Iowa backwater to wear plaid, eat butter, and rub elbows with every plainspoken, mouth-breathing jackass at the local fair whose family has lived in the same town of a 1,500 people for 5 generations, ie., Americans in "the heartland."

America has a real problem seeing itself in the mirror.
We sure know what we think we look like.
But, boy, that ain't what everyone else sees.

apis_cerana -12 points-11 points 1 month ago

Hello, your classism is showing.

RLucas3000 9 points10 points 1 month ago

I think he’s saying that is not all America is.

crim-sama 3 points4 points 1 month ago

theres plenty of poorer areas in america that arent like the one in the OP.

exoriare 4 points5 points 1 month ago

If an adult with any sort of moral compass held sway in this town, they'd have canceled the school's football program in the wake of this incident.

The only civic virtue of competitive sports programs in schools is to instill values of goods sportsmanship and peaceful competition. If this has instead been perverted into a cult of desperate "win at all costs" superiority, it should be eradicated.

sirmav 0 points1 point 1 month ago

Where we the opposite

rishi851 -62 points-61 points 1 month ago

Morality is a man made concept bro. You'll hate me for saying this but the older i grow and see around the more I realize morality is just man made crap. All the most successful, wealthiest, most powerful people in all of history, not just recent but all history have been at best amoral and usually completely immoral.

catrb933 29 points30 points 1 month ago

Depends on your definition of success I guess

KalpolIntro 30 points31 points 1 month ago

Of course it's a man made concept. I don't understand why you're calling it crap though.

Would you prefer a society without morals?

use_of_a_name 17 points18 points 1 month ago

I get the feeling that his actually opinion is more nuanced, but he has expressed it rather terribly in this post. I am also very confused by what appears to be a run on paragraph, expressing a one sentence idea, over the course of many

ChipsHanden 7 points8 points 1 month ago

People are merely tools to exploit for your own personal gain, love doesn't exist, and you will die alone, so best get to murdering, raping, and stealing because the only thing that matters is your own hedonistic pleasure.

And if your property is stolen, or you get raped, abused/exploited, or murdered, it was probably your fault for being so stupid.

Edit: giant /s

EphemeralApricity 7 points8 points 1 month ago

You either forgot the /s or the intense and in-depth therapy.

schwerpunk 3 points4 points 1 month ago

Or, we could try not doing any of that, and all be a lot better off.

pahobee 137 points138 points 1 month ago

When I was a little girl I got bullied and teased by a few boys. I hated it and would try to tell on them. Guess what the teachers would say to me? People use that phrase to avoid teaching boys personal responsibility.

frickfracksnack 36 points37 points 1 month ago

This is the key. The degree of personal responsibility varies depending on who is saying it.

am_animator 60 points61 points 1 month ago

Bra snapping and undoing in the halls in 7-8th grade. Even without straps boys could unhook you thru a shirt.

"Boys will be boys"

Sly442 -5 points-4 points 1 month ago

Wtf where's that

mister_brian 17 points18 points 1 month ago

They are cowards. Afraid to stand up to children.

mrs_ouchi 8 points9 points 1 month ago

adults really need to understand and have to stop saying boys will be boys

0100001101110111 -11 points-10 points 1 month ago

Bullied and teased by kids < gang rape

joleme 13 points14 points 1 month ago

Just because one thing is worse than the other doesn't mean it still wasn't bad to the other person. for fuck sakes she didn't even make the comparison to rape. Grow up

0100001101110111 -4 points-3 points 1 month ago

Honestly, getting teased as a kid (I’m assuming <12 yrs old) is inevitable and they’ll tease you about anything whether you’re a boy or a girl so it’s not at all comparable and irrelevant in this situation.

secret-x-stars 1 point2 points 1 month ago

don't worry they say the same shit if boys are making lewd comments at a girl or snapping her bra straps or any other manner of sexual harassment you can think of as well lol

dansedemorte 37 points38 points 1 month ago

Don't fool yourself rape was back then too. Just that victims were even more scared to talk about it.

mwagner26 28 points29 points 1 month ago

I don't know if this is the right wording, but hearing "boys will be boys" used when involving sick heinous actions like rape really makes me mad as a male. I'm not a piece of shit. Mother fuckers need to be held accountable.

sumaksion 73 points74 points 1 month ago

Eh, I wouldn't be entirely sure about that. I feel like back in the day, you were just way less likely to hear about the rapes at all/consider them rapes.

mister_brian 56 points57 points 1 month ago

That is true. A 12 year old girl in my neighborhood used to get off the bus at a neighbors until her mom got off work. It was a house where her parents knew the other parents and there were like 3 brothers living there. I’d always see her get off at their stop. They seemed fine even though neither of their parents would be home for many hours. Years later she had many mental breakdowns and was hospitalized. Turns out the brothers and their friends were molesting her and taking turns having sex with her.

darkoblivion000 18 points19 points 1 month ago

Jesus fucking christ

mrs_ouchi 0 points1 point 1 month ago

that Vinnie guy said something like that, like that makes it okay... like in Audrie & Daisy - the shit people said in this doc. The sherriff, the ex mayor.. it was disgusting

Woofles85 31 points32 points 1 month ago

For me, “boys will be boys” meant playing with dirt and frogs having belching contests. Innocent stuff.

tightheadband 9 points10 points 1 month ago

Tell that to the frogs

writemyswing 140 points141 points 1 month ago

Nope, I had attended an all-boys schools and bwbb would be used as an excuse that boys can't control themselves, boys can't help but touch, and boys are naturally like that and can't be helped, and there is no use fixing something that is "natural". Bwbb has done damage and caused harm and is seen as a reasonable excuse for doing damaging and irresponsible things for men not only of adolescent age doing petty things.

Azelais 94 points95 points 1 month ago

I’m a woman who attended a normal public school and yeah, this right here.

Bwbb was definitely used to refer to innocent dumb childhood things, but also used as a way to excuse behavior.

When I was in elementary school, I had this boy who tormented me by constantly stealing my stuff, knocking stuff out of my hands, pulling my hair, trying to pants me, etc. He’d get detentions often enough, but the teachers always would excuse his actions with “oooh that means he likes you” or “boys will be boys”, so he’d never really stop. It was really irritating, and then once we got to middle school, the behavior upgraded to stuff like snapping my bra straps or grabbing me.

It’s offensive to boys too when used like that imo, because it implies that they’re mindless beasts who can’t control themselves.

OfficerUnreasonable 25 points26 points 1 month ago

“oooh that means he likes you”

That mindset fucking enrages me. You see parents use this so much and all it is doing is teaching girls that violence against them is OK. That they still love you but "look what you made me do".

Dr-MantisTobogganPhD 49 points50 points 1 month ago

Your point about teachers excusing their behavior by saying it's "because they like you" reminds of something Uma Thurman said in her first interview after everything finally came out about Harvey Weinstein:


blizzardswirl 8 points9 points 1 month ago

And it puts sexual harassment and assault in the same category as the silly things described by 'boys will be boys' too.

How bad can what happens to you be if the same phrase is applied to it as was applied to the boys in your class licking a frog at recess? It makes the fact that boys are trying to take off your clothes or grab your private parts seem like it's something you are being mean to be upset by.

There's a reason it's not 'kids will be kids'. Only boys have a phrase specifically absolving them of responsibility, and it does a disservice to boys almost as much as girls.

Bringing it back to this case: these boys in question didn't even really seem to understand that they could be held responsible for their actions. Would they have acted differently if that had been a possibility to them? Would they have been more inclined to treat their victim like another human being deserving respect? I'd like to hope so.

mister_brian 30 points31 points 1 month ago

I know that is said all the time but it’s important you know that boys don’t hear that. They hear you have permission to act however you would like sexually without consequences. Nobody fights privilege. Especially children.

JeffMatthews410 3 points4 points 1 month ago

Every now and then I think about contacting my old high school teachers on social media. For a few it’s to thank them for their hard work and guidance. For others it’s to tell them they were worthless fucking failures and that while they’re too stupid to be ashamed of themselves, it makes their ineptitude no less shameful.

joleme 0 points1 point 1 month ago

It's odd that I thought I was a grown man but I never shoved my hands down a girls pants or up her skirt and I've never tried to rape a girl or grope her and I've never tried to hurt people.

I must not be a boy....?


Aerik[🍰] 12 points13 points 1 month ago

Actually it did mean that. every single time boy or young man under 24 raped a woman. in a courtroom, in the sherriff's office, at the police station.

snanos332 36 points37 points 1 month ago

Which part of 'school yard fights' does not involve 'harming anyone else'? When you say 'boys will be boys' to that it promotes a culture of violence in young boys.

AnarchoPlatypi 14 points15 points 1 month ago

I think it means "doesn't harm anyone else except the boys themselves"

hexedjw -1 points0 points 1 month ago

All that teaches is that it's okay to have violent outbursts if no one else is involved.

snanos332 -22 points-21 points 1 month ago

Like how rape doesn't physically affect anyone other than the person being raped?

AnarchoPlatypi 16 points17 points 1 month ago

Wow. Do I really have to explain you the difference between a schoolyard fight between two active articipants and a raping of a non-consenting, unwilling teenage girl.

Also, "boys will be boys" isn't always a form of acceptance and hand waving. I think that schoolyard fights will happen, as boys will be boys, but it's not a reason to not to punish the kids for fighting. Otherwise they won't learn to control their aggression as adults. However were I a parent I probably wouldn't be massively alarmed if my kid got in a schoolyard fight.

mw1994 0 points1 point 1 month ago

Shit you’re right, boys having a scrap is basically rape.

mindpainters 2 points3 points 1 month ago

Eating worms was a big boys will be boys thing in elementary school. Maybe we were just weird lol

devictionne 2 points3 points 1 month ago

To be fair, the only people who think "boys will be boys" means raping somebody are actually fucking stupid and are most likely .001% of the population or less. So no, it doesn't mean that

AndySipherBull 2 points3 points 1 month ago

lol bullshit. The world didn't change, you did. You were naive and now you're less naive.

Passivefamiliar 4 points5 points 1 month ago

Worst thing boys will be boys ever meant for my world was racing cars. Granted that COULD have been very deadly to several people. But it carried no malicious intent. Just wanted to go fast.

I read stories like this, and hate the world I live in. What do we do with evil like this out there? Sadly, it takes a dark path to get rid of it.... or so I dread.

Mean_Ass_Dumbledore 5 points6 points 1 month ago

When I was in school “boys will be boys” usually referred to two guys going to a dirt road outside of town to fight out their differences while onlookers watched out for the sheriff or stop things if they started getting out of hand. Never, ever, ever has this phrase referred to accepting rape culture.


Azelais 31 points32 points 1 month ago

Well, watch the video and you’ll see it.

Your experiences are not universal. Bwbb in my experience referred to stuff like schoolyard fights, yeah, but also to stuff like guys snapping girls’ bra straps or trying to grab their boobs, that kinda thing. It would be excused by “that’s just how men are”, the guys would see they could get away with it because boys would be boys and would escalate their behavior. Luckily no one ever got raped at my school (to my knowledge), but you can see how the behavior escalation could lead there.

timdrinksbeer 3 points4 points 1 month ago

Unfortunately I'm sure it's more likely that no one came forward and reported the rape.

Mean_Ass_Dumbledore 0 points1 point 1 month ago

I’m from a pretty small town, the stereotypical type where everyone knows you and your family. Most of the time if someone did something genuinely wrong, they’d get swats from the coaches and then their parents would mysteriously turn up at school and chew their asses out some more.

Azelais 15 points16 points 1 month ago

I’m also from a stereotypical small town where everyone knows everyone. A we only have four red lights, HS football is life, don’t go to Walmart with your mom cause she’ll start talking to a billion cousins you didn’t know you had kinda place.

In a lot of ways, being from such a small place probably made that kind of behavior worse. Because “oh, Joe would never do something like that, I’ve known his family for years and they’re good people” or it being impossible to keep something under wraps because everyone knows everyone and will tell everyone.

rockynputz -3 points-2 points 1 month ago


Zeabos 1 point2 points 1 month ago

Eh, the problem is I think it always meant this awful stuff. Most of us were just naïve enough to think it was limited to silly things.

TheBatJeff 1 point2 points 1 month ago

Seriously. When I was a kid it was about doing stupid things like getting a little too physical during games, or stupid shit like eating bugs. Nobody I knew ever said "oh. He raed her? Well boys will be boys".

Salty_snowflake 0 points1 point 1 month ago

Exactly. And people saying that this is “boys will be boys” is completely missing the point. Nobody I know would see a group rape a young girl and claim “welp, boys will be boys”. This community that defended them was either really fucked up or we’re missing something.

[deleted] -5 points-4 points 1 month ago


AlamutJones 23 points24 points 1 month ago

That’s not at all what that shirt meant though.

Boys will be good humans. Ideally, all children will grow up to be good humans above all.

[deleted] -10 points-9 points 1 month ago


AlamutJones 9 points10 points 1 month ago

Who claimed all men were evil?

chugonthis 0 points1 point 1 month ago

Yeah it just means plays rougher, not rape, anyone that rapes is instantly a scumbag

Starklet 0 points1 point 1 month ago

No fucking shit

great_gape 0 points1 point 1 month ago


Welcome to Conservative America.

shoutfromtheruthtop 0 points1 point 1 month ago

Even then, it's harmful, because girls are taught that it's inappropriate to engage in that kind of behaviour and that it's only for boys. Sit down, be quiet, etc.

In Australia we have this campaign called "Girls make your move" and it's because boys are more likely to spend their lunchtimes doing active things, while girls are more likely to sit in the one spot. This leads to worse health outcomes for young women. And I'm pretty sure these kinds of attitudes play a role in that.

lafolieisgood 0 points1 point 1 month ago

Ya the guy that said that was looking at it from the boys perspective and not giving one thought to the young girls that have to live though the trama’s perspective

BobOki 0 points1 point 1 month ago

Boys will be boys never meant what they are saying. It is that lovely social bullshit we want to throw on everyone, taking phrases and just using them at will. Boys will be boys still means exactly what you said, no matter what Brett and his Dom trans lover say, it is not their phrase to use or change, just as it is not our place to tell them how to live.

Clews207 0 points1 point 1 month ago


[deleted] 0 points1 point 1 month ago

schoolyard fights

anything that harmed anyone else

[deleted] -119 points-118 points 1 month ago


Calm-Alkyne 201 points202 points 1 month ago

I've only ever heard it used by people using it as a strawman

Well if you actually watch the documentary that won't be the case anymore.

[deleted] -341 points-340 points 1 month ago


Loadsock96 32 points33 points 1 month ago

A doc calling out child rapists is feminist propaganda? Since when did you start defending pedos?

BlargleVVargle 70 points71 points 1 month ago

I'm not going to invest an hour and a half of my life in feminist propaganda.

Imagine calling the documentary of the rape of a child this. Imagine hating women so much you write this about such a thing.

Acrolith 126 points127 points 1 month ago

Turns out it's pretty easy not to see evidence if you refuse to look at it.

CaptainChaos74 83 points84 points 1 month ago

"Rape is unfortunate" - /u/PuddleOfMush, 2019

Calm-Alkyne 170 points171 points 1 month ago

How to be an absolute dumbass in three easy steps:

Step 1. Say you've never seen evidence for something so it must be faked.

Step 2: Be provided with the evidence of what you were talking about, thus disproving your position.

Step 3: Immediately go on a long winded rant giving excuses as to why you wont view the evidence; while at the same time, in a very paradoxical manner, somehow trying to discredit the very same evidence you refuse to even examine. Because in your mind, it can't be real since it goes against your beliefs.

Congratulations! You followed the above steps perfectly you're officially a dumbass.

vowelspace 91 points92 points 1 month ago

I think that Americans fetishising male high school athletes and doing whatever to protect them from the consequences of their dickish behavior is exactly that OP meant by “boys will be boys” attitude.

funkygecko 20 points21 points 1 month ago

Not really. Sport may be a factor in the US, but stuff like this happens in other countries, too. I'm Italian and I know of a couple of gang-rape cases in which the community sided with the boys because they were from "good families". Mind you, good doesn't mean rich in this specific context over here. It means your average Italian family with hard-working parents who've never been in trouble with the law. But somehow "forgot" to teach their spawn how to be decent human beings. It's infuriating. And I'm not saying this as a feminist, but as the mother of a male teenager. Respect needs to be taught. From an early age.

marmiterules 61 points62 points 1 month ago

Imagine my shock to find you're a /r/mensrights fanboy

THISISLESSTHANTWENTY 31 points32 points 1 month ago

I don’t know if you’re trolling or not, but all it takes is one very quick websearch of “boys will be boys rape defense” to prove you absolutely completely 100% wrong here.

zzzrecruit 10 points11 points 1 month ago

A young teenager was raped.

It is explained is why it was bad.

The response from the adults that lived there was also bad.

Somehow is a problem with feminism.

oopsallberries216 8 points9 points 1 month ago


Fartbox_Virtuoso 1 point2 points 1 month ago

It's not a "boys being boys" thing, it's something that happens with sports. Players are idolized even if they are absolute dickbags.

Somebody got their ass kicked by the athletes in school, an is still obsessing over it, right, u/PuddleOfMush?

contract_law -27 points-26 points 1 month ago

This is what's wrong with Reddit. He gave a perfectly reasonable explanation about small towns idolizing football players and being inclined to defend them when it came to their criminal activity, but he gets downvoted 196 times anyways. It is WAY more likely an explanation for the town coming to the defense of these rapists, as opposed to some collective psychosis that an entire town thinks its ok for men to rape women because of something inane and delusional as "boys will be boys".

pikajake 28 points29 points 1 month ago

well then you’re pretty lucky, i’ve heard some disgusting things that are all too real

tm17 8 points9 points 1 month ago

Criminals will be criminals.

[deleted] -140 points-139 points 1 month ago


WhoAccountNewDis 45 points46 points 1 month ago

Do you need to turn everything into a pity party?

The topic is the cover up of a violent rape perpetrated by football players who were considered town heros (one of whom also happened to be the son of a powerful government official).

Anarcho_Doggo 3 points4 points 1 month ago

Weird how it's always the mysoginists that castrate the idea of what being a man could entail and then paint men as lunatics without self control in the same breath.

ABDriversSuck 9 points10 points 1 month ago

... No one here is saying that so you're just saying your own secret beliefs.

[deleted] -28 points-27 points 1 month ago


the-waves 36 points37 points 1 month ago

Since when is it that only Republicans abuse and harm women? I agree with everything in your comment except the implication that this type of behavior is exclusive to one political party.

StrawmanFallacyFound -5 points-4 points 1 month ago

It's just the Republican party makes a note of these behaviors being mandatory for admission unlike other parties.

the-waves 7 points8 points 1 month ago

Yes, yes, Republicans are bad. I agree that it's obvious that Democrats are significantly better when it comes to addressing these issues.

But 1 in 5 women are sexually assaulted. And plenty of rapists are Democrats. It's not an issue with just Republicans. Pointing out that Republicans are worse isn't all that helpful. It'd probably be better to point out which belief systems Republicans have that make them worse than Democrats rather than just turning it into another political blame game.

ramos1969 -8 points-7 points 1 month ago

So you think 16 year old Ma’lik Richmond from the inner city is a ‘standard republican’. Interesting.

icedsoychai 6 points7 points 1 month ago

Speaking of Ma’lik Richmond, he recently got removed from the sex offender list even though he only served less than a year of juvie AND still went on to play college football for a little. WTF.

Fireach 5 points6 points 1 month ago

TIL that a town of 18,000 people is "the inner city"

[deleted] -14 points-13 points 1 month ago


[deleted] 9 points10 points 1 month ago


Anarcho_Doggo 3 points4 points 1 month ago

They're both shit. They were previously friends. Both cheated on their wives. Both are unrepentant pigs. Both were friends with Epstein. Both are pedos.

Stop catering to the right's whataboutism. You're just feeding into their whitewashing. Call them out for what it really is. Let them be the only one apologizing for a piece of shit child rapist in chief and associate them as pedo defenders for doing so.

hexedjw -1 points0 points 1 month ago

The point is that we as a culture are handwaving personal responsibility of boys and in the future men with this phrase.

f3l1x -3 points-2 points 1 month ago

Yea I mean I’m happy this documentary exists to expose this but conflating it with “boys will be boys” is damaging as fuck and they know it.

ErictheRedding -2 points-1 points 1 month ago

Gotta push that "boys bad" agenda!

Driftkingtofu -16 points-15 points 1 month ago

Pretty sure literally the only people who justify rape by saying boys will be boys are screen writers and outrage journalists

Thagothropist 12 points13 points 1 month ago

Or Republican political leaders

Kweefus -13 points-12 points 1 month ago

It hasn’t changed. I’ve never met a single person rationalize rape with “boys will be boys.” It’s the same fau-outrage that’s all over the Internet.

I’ve never met a loony SJW or the rabid racist trump supporter. I don’t know where these people are, but they aren’t near me. Trolls are trolling trolls.

Orngog 11 points12 points 1 month ago

You are commenting on a video that shows exactly what you are claiming to be false

tekprodfx16 -3 points-2 points 1 month ago

The south is just a big bucket of low iq stupid as fucking shit bible thumping nimrods. They’re the American Taliban. Their ways of thinking are stuck in a period that happened 200 years ago. Fucking maggots of progressive society. They need to be deported back to Scotland by ICE