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October 13, 2009, 10:15 AM

Joan Jett: What I've Learned

The rock star on the word "rock," the color black, Mike Tyson, Howard Dean, the immediacy of the music industry, and more

By A.J. Jacobs

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Michael Lavine

There's this thing that happens when a guitar chord is struck a certain way — it slightly bends out of tune and then goes back into tune. And there's a connection from that sound right through your crotch, right up into your heart.

They've turned the word rock into nothing. It's a meaningless word. "It rocks." "That food rocks." "She's rocking in that outfit." They've taken the word and stripped it of all its menace, of all its dirt, of all its sex.



I learned to scream from Marc Bolan of T. Rex.


I remember times when I was at shows and the person onstage locked eyes with me. And in that moment, everything was right with the world. I think that's part of my job, to create these thousands of moments every night. And for the rest of their life, they can say, "You guys looked at me," or "You sweated on me," or "I got your gum."



Don't be afraid. Because you're going to be afraid. But remember when you become afraid, just don't be afraid.

They said, "Lose the guitar. Maybe you'll be more palatable without the guitar."


I think some of our lyrics that might be considered angry, if they were sung by a guy, they'd be called passionate or intense.

I don't look good in beige.

When you're onstage, you just have to empty out and stay as empty as you can and let it come in. It's like you're driving around in your car and all of a sudden, you wind up on the other side of town, and you're like, How'd I get here?

The national anthem is a very hard song to sing. You gotta start in the right spot or you're screwed.

I never lived in Wisconsin. One of those images you see as a kid — I might have been six or seven — it was a Sports Illustrated cover. Everybody was completely muddy, so muddy you couldn't see who was wearing what uniform. One guy had a swipe across the helmet where the mud was wiped off, and you could see part of the G through it. For some reason, as a kid, just seeing that G, I became a Green Bay Packers fan. Isn't that weird?


When I watch these cop shows, I think of how many things boil down to: Someone's pride was offended. Somebody was disrespected.



I was onstage when Howard Dean did his famous yell. It was completely blown out of proportion. The press couldn't even get the emotion right. They were saying he was angry. No, he was effervescent.

I don't think about the shouting. Should I do it high, do I do it hard? I just do it. It's guttural.

In the beginning, I used to eat discarded food off other people's Holiday Inn trays. I mean, it was discarded.

People come up and stab you, give you a shot in the ribs with one finger, like you're the Pillsbury Doughboy. They want to see if you're real. They have a sense of ownership. You're public domain, to be touched, like with the Statue of Liberty.

I don't Google myself. Never read message boards, either, because that's even more dangerous.

Being in a band is like being in a family. It's intense, it's emotional. It's not always smooth. In fact, something's kind of weird if it is smooth.

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