Elevator Talk

Author's note: I'm tired, grumpy, and feeling very bad about myself. Tell me my writing doesn't suck; I need it desperately. Aww, what the hell- I need a pity party, haha.

Four pages of straight dialogue (except for the end), fun and uncomplicated. There's potential for a follow-up if you ask nicely.




"So… what?"

"We're stuck."


"In an elevator."


"That's stopped on god-only-knows what floor of a place that's gotta be nearly deserted with the lights off."

"And yet I can see the wheels turning in that head of yours."

"Party pooper."

"I try."



"Such a big talker."

"Mmm." Pause. "Do you have your cell phone with you?"


"Well, does it work?"

"The battery died."

"Why are you carrying it around with you?"

"Because I feel like it."

"My god, you're pathetic."

"My god, you sound like me."




"You started it, hello."


Long, slightly awkward silence.


"What now, Jordan?"

"Lily and Bug, huh? Who woulda thought?"


"Pft. Right. You? Relationship screwer-upper extraordinaire?"

"I'm flattered."

"Yeah. Seriously, you knew?"

"I guess. They just clicked. Quit making me sound like a sappy romantic."

"You're not?"

"Excuse me while I choke on your sarcasm."

"That's me. But hey, the wedding doesn't get you in a 'mood'?"


"I'll take that as a 'no', I suppose."


"This is such a random conversation."

"You're a very random person, Jordan."

"I am not. Truth or dare?"

"Case in point…"

"C'mon, Garret, be a sport."

"Well, seeing as we're in a dark elevator in which there is nothing but the two of us, and also seeing as you are the queen of evil, terrible, horrible dares, I pick truth."

"Mwahaha. Okay. Have you ever… had romantic feelings for anyone in this building, male or female, and no, Lily does not count, because everyone knew about you and her."


"You can't pass. Who was- or is- it?"

"I never said yes."

"You 'passed', which clearly indicates a positive answer that you obviously don't want to reveal to me."

"Mmm. Perceptive, are we?"

"Garret, tell me who it was, or is."

"I think… not."

"I think… yes."


"Garret." Pause. "I can make you, you know. I know things."


"Wanna bet?"

"It's my turn. Have you ever had romantic feelings for anyone in this building, male or female, and no, Woody doesn't count either.

"Unlike you, I'll play the game right. Yes, presently."


"As in I still do, Einstein."

"Who is it?"

"Nuh-uh. My turn. I dare you to tell me."

"I didn't say dare."

"Doesn't matter. You didn't do the last one, so now you have to take a dare."

"Who says?"

"Me, duh."

"Something different, Jordan."

"You really don't wanna tell me, do you? Garret, god, it's not like I'm gonna tell the damn world."



"Okay, I'm sorry."

"Forgive you. If I have to."

"You do. I'll try again. Ever had a crush on a teacher?"

"Once. Sort of."



"Yeah, yeah."


"If, hypothetically, things had worked out between you and Woody, would you have ever married him?"

"Hypothetically? No."



"I'll take that as a sign to drop it."

"Thank you."

"No problem." Pause. "Would you ever marry anyone? Hypothetically?"

Long pause. The lights flicker, then turn on, and the elevator doors open. They stand up.

"Hypothetically, it depends." Jordan winks at him. "But, hypothetically, if I got stuck in an elevator again in pitch-blackness, there's no one I'd rather be with than you."