Nairobi News


Shame on you if you can’t win arguments without insults

There was a very interesting meme circulating on social media recently. The meme stated, “You should read books and improve your intellectual capacity. You can’t always say ‘kwendaa’ in every argument.

I laughed so hard when I saw it but I was also sad because I realized how true it was. I have heard a lot of people say “Wewe kwendaaaa!” when they are suffering from a deficiency of facts during an argument. Then there are those who just resort to insulting the other party.

You cannot win an argument with insults. The moment you do that, you have already lost. You can only win an argument by outsmarting the other party with endless bits of knowledge.

The other day, I also saw activist Benjo Ndolo arguing with Raila’s daughter Winnie Odinga online. Winnie had said how the Kenyan government had failed Kenyans, especially because of the drought. Ndolo then told her to tell her father the same thing since he was now close to the president.


Winnie didn’t seem to be in the mood to argue with Ndolo so she told him to direct his sentiments to the president.

Ndolo immediately lost the argument by responding with a derogatory remark about Winnie’s looks.

It was a low blow especially for a respected activist like him.

Instead of using insults, you can always keep quiet and end the arguments. There is no shame in that.

Learn to respect your fellow interlocutor’s views and if you don’t like what they are saying, you can simply stop engaging with them.


There is a popular book called How To Win Friends And Influence People. In it, the author Dale Carnegie says “I have come to the conclusion that there is only one way under high heaven to get the best of an argument — and that is to avoid it. Avoid it as you would avoid rattlesnakes and earthquakes.”

This is great advice for two instances – when you realize you don’t have facts, or when you realize the person you are about to argue with doesn’t have facts. When arguing with a fool, people from far can’t tell who the fool is and who isn’t, right?

There are those who also resort to fighting when they have been cornered with facts. Apparently, their fists and legs work better than their brains, so they resort to blows and kicks.

Violence is never a solution to anything. You are not fighting for independence. You are not fighting because you are a soldier. You are not fighting because you are a boxer or a wrestler. You are just fighting to win an argument? Terrible!

Learn to argue better or avoid arguments altogether. Insults are petty and so are fights. Be smart, be logical and have some self-respect.