Tuesday, May 22, 2012

The State of Nursing

So... I feel like I haven't written on here much lately because I'm not even sure what's going on.  For at least the past month nursing has been extremely painful.  To the point of crying (and sometimes screaming) at 3am and being ready to give it all up.

We've been to the chiropractor.  I've given up eating anything with gluten in it.  We've been to an ear nose and throat specialist.  The La Leche League leader has been to my house.  Next week we are going to visit a specialist in Seattle.  Right now the only thing helping me keep on is the hope that something will change next week.  If it doesn't?  I may very well give up.

We think that Joy may be tongue tied, a very particular kind called posterior tongue tie.  And perhaps to a lesser extent Hope as well.  Which means that they can't get a good latch unless they are in the exact perfect position and even then it doesn't last long.

It's so bad that Joy hasn't been getting enough to eat (which I didn't realize until last week) and so weighs significantly less than Hope.  I'm not sure how much, but you can tell by looking at them and picking them up.  When you're only dealing with 10 or 11 pounds to begin with a significant weight difference means a lot.

It's not a fun place to be in and I really hope we can resolve it next week.

On a slightly happier note... I have been enjoying working in my yard a lot.  And we have a wild rose in the back corner of our yard (that the renter before we bought it tried to kill so this is the first year it's actually bloomed).

As well as this gorgeous white blooming bush on the fence in our neighbors yard!

And I planted some wildflower seeds which I hope will come up... I don't seem to have much luck with planting anything, all we've got is what was here before we moved in!


  1. Oh, Krista! I'm praying things get better for you! If they don't, however, please remember: you are not a failure! I couldn't nurse my first, and I felt horrible making the decision to stop, but she thrived. Hang in there, but if you can't, you can't. *hugs*

  2. Praying for you. I applaud you for persevering and seeking all the help you can get to nurse twins.
    Take care!

  3. What Hillary said! I hope this works out and you are able to sort things out. But all of my children have been on bottles and they are quite the healthy bunch. (In fact, when the latest was born, I told Jonathan and everyone else we were doing bottles from the start because I didn't want to be as stressed out as I was after Bookworm1 was born. It made for such a soothing transition.) Just saying, you aren't a failure and sometimes it brings more peace and removes anxiety and allows you to just ENJOY them. Which is also important!

  4. Oh, Krista! As you know, I know that pain too...and it's terrible. You are a strong woman to endure it for so long. Not only is it physically painful, it's emotionally exhausting too. But, as you already know, when the pain passes...it's wonderful.

    Hang in there! I'm praying for you!


  5. Awwwww. Nursing one at a time was enough! It can be such a wonderful/horrible experience. Great when all is going well. Terrible when baby doesn't latch properly. My mom said she remembers nursing my sister and I at the same time. Wishing you well.

  6. Allison7:10 PM

    So very sorry. :( I can relate to the pain of having a hard time nursing. Even if you do have to give up nursing you have made it through the first 2 months, when breastmilk is most important (as their immune systems should be functioning on their own by now), so congrats on that! May you have wisdom and peace about what decision to make.

  7. All my prayers are with you and your family. It's tough but I wish you'll stay strong and positive all the time.

