Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Getting Rid of Jiggle

It's the end of April. Already.
So this past week's FFI, had me stating that I am going to be doing something about my weight struggle.
Starting on Friday (new month and all) I'll be doing my darndest to shear what weight I can off of my body.
I weigh 178 pounds. That's heavier than I was either time I had my babies. I'm disgusted with what I see there, and am thoroughly disappointed in myself for letting it get as bad as it is. I have a small frame, it just was not built to hold a whole lot of weight.
So being fed up with what I'm seeing in the mirror (or NOT, as I avoid them at times), noticing that last year's spring/summer clothes don't fit me, and the knowledge that I'll be returning to my hometown soon, have helped me to decide to take some action.
My first step?
Cut down on the portions that I'm eating. Seriously...I could eat a full 3-4 servings of a meal in one sitting, and be hungry about an hour later.
So I get to start measuring out the portions before I eat them, just so I get to know what they look like, cause right now I over-estimate.
I'll also be shearing off how much I eat by limiting the amount of meals I eat in a day. In the course of a regular day I eat breakfast, lunch, dinner, and a late evening meal, not long before bed. So, we'll be taking away that last meal, adding in two small snack times, and eliminating food after 8pm.
My second step is to drink more water. I go through phases where I drink more-than-enough, just-right, and not-enough. I'm in a not-enough phase right now. As the weather heats up, I'll be shoving that into the more-than-enough range.
My third step is to get my butt in gear and find some of that energy that I seem to have lost.
My dream goal would be to work back down to the 130-140lbs range, but I know that's going to take me a while, so for the time being I'd be happy just to squeeze into last year's clothes comfortably without too much hangin over the edge, and the ability to breathe.
I plan to keep myself focused with regular updates on here...that's right, you'll be my jury! Starting with tomorrow's HNT picture (I'll do two, one for this series, and one for the regular).

I've been asked what I think about my body after my series of photo therapy pictures. I can see the beauty in parts of it now. The lean shape or my legs, the smooth texture of my skin, the coloration of my birthmarks, the way my hair falls, eyes blink, lips curl. I've noticed plenty about my body that I didn't know or think other's noticed before. It's liberating.
I like my body in it's parts. I hate my body as a whole.
I'm a rectangle that jiggles when something bumps it. When I wave the shit under my arms waves back and starts a tidal wave that travels (snickering? I am). Bodies aren't supposed to do that. I'm never going to have a smaller than a size 8 frame. My ribs are wide, my torso short...I'm never going to have one of those lovely long & lean frames. Now, that doesn't mean I can't make mine worth drooling over, it's just me expressing my disappointment out loud.
If I could just get rid of the jiggle...I'd be happy at any size.

10 thoughtful remarks:

My expressions LIVE said...

All of us need to improve our lifestyle in regards to eating and excercise....I will join you in the endevours of weight loss.....Keeping each other in check....xoxoxoxo I think you look fine as you are btw. ;)

Janet said...

Size doesn't count, in this instance, as long as you're healthy! Curves rock, straight lines, not so much :-) Good luck with your weight loss journey!

LarryG said...

You Go Amber!
You can do it.
I can tell you'll be successful by the way you are talking now.

You got a great attitude and confidence!
Wishing you the best!

Anonymous said...

Sugar you look great from here.

Best of luck getting to whatever weight/size you want to! You can do it. I know you can and will.

Go get em!

only a movie said...

You do look great, but I can understand wanting to feel comfortable in your own skin. You have a good start with the strategies you laid out. I'm sure you'll do well!
Good luck!

Billy Rhythm said...

If you're not happy with yourself, then by all means, do what you need to do. Make sure you're doing it because YOU want to, though. I agree with Janet: Curves rock! In the words of my new hero, Moto Moto: "There's nothing wrong with lovin' plumpy." And, as I once heard a Spanish guy explain: "Meat is for the man; bones are for the dog."


Andhari said...

Best of luck to you, Amber. You know you can do it, and Rome isn't built in a day. Take your time.

Jack said...

I boy can I relate! Since I quite smoking a year ago, I put on 20+ lbs!!

Hubby and I have decided to start a healthy eating plan and hire trainers to get into shape... May is our start month.

Good luck to you and keep us updated on your progress :)

Ragtop Day said...

How timely, considering my own post on a similar topic today!
Making the commitment to yourself is the hardest thing to do, especially when you have so many other things in your life demanding your attention. And yet, it's the easiest too, since if you don't take care of yourself, how can you take care of anyone else? You are worth it, and they are worth it. I'm a big emotional eater, so finding other things to feed my feelings is a huge part of my struggle. As is, for me, getting over the difficulty of the first two weeks. After that it starts to become easier, and before you know it, new habits are forming.

I see I have written a book here (and I could go on longer!), but wanted you to know this really resonated with me, and I'm in your corner - you can do anything you set your mind to!

Jaime said...

i could have written the exact same post about myself. but i'm working on it. good luck.