Staying Balanced in Midst of Chaos & Conflict

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Getting Sucked Down the Rabbit Hole

Realizing that I was definitely off center with the intense emotions before and after the 2016 US Presidential Election, I had to regain my equilibrium. I had gotten lost in a litany of distressing events and obsessed with surfing the internet for news to try to understand what was happening and why. As a result, I was vacillating in the emotional sea of worry, upset, depression and gloom.

Reconnecting with My Core

I needed to practice what I preach as a stress management expert. While I think it is imperative to be informed about current events, the forces that are guiding those events, and the big picture of overall trends, there has to be a balance between awareness with detachment and then action if appropriate. A long view of history shows continuous conflicts. Yet mankind has continued and some progress has been made. While there are global and national issues to be addressed, there are also local and personal issues as well. One still has to carry water and chop wood, but being aware of myself as a soul, as a spiritual being and consciousness beyond time and space, helps me immensely. 

Basic Self Care

Balancing the mind and emotions has to start with adequate sleep as the foundation along with wholesome food and exercise. I practice Donna Eden’s 5 minute exercise routine, which helps balance the brain and body so I can think better, raises vitality and gets the body’s energy to flow properly. I also drink Source Energy Medicine (energized water). Besides hydrating the system, it is intended to raise your vibration while it deals with health issues. 

Stress Management

40580f831cc2f1219357730c661ae625 I have many tools for this , but the first thing I do to dump stress and clear my mind so that I can see things more clearly is to use the Infinite Intelligence Process that I have written about in Accessing More — Tapping Into the Eternal, Unlimited Self with the Infinite Intelligence Process. One part of this three-pronged modality is to set up a hypnotic or dowsing program (several paragraphs long) that is run by a shortcut command consisting of 2 trigger words. I use the words “process” and “go” to run the program. For example,

“From the perspective of my High Self, process and resolve everything I have read and heard on the news and internet today. Keep only what is true, relevant and important, and discard the rest. Release any unnecessary fear or worry so that I can sleep peacefully through the night. Go.”

What is mine to do?

If I am going to pick a battle to fight, an issue to address, and a way of making a difference, I need to prioritize. What is my job to do? Where can I make a difference? Perhaps all that I can do quickly is to make others aware of what is going on. Perhaps I can sign a petition, send an email to appropriate parties. A colleague advocates getting involved in town meetings. And I agree that locally is where most of our power lies. But it comes back to asking where I want to focus my energy.

To help me make better choices, I use another part of the Infinite Intelligence Process, which is to affirm that I already have an inner wisdom that is resourceful and capable of meeting any challenge and making decisions. I start out with “there is a part of me that knows____ and that part is ___.” I let the words sink in without having to consciously know the answers. Rather, I trust that by just saying/thinking it with assurance that some divine wisdom is accessible to me, something is initiated to make it true. In the best sense of the word, it is a statement of faith that activates change on an unconscious level. For example,

“There is a part of my being that knows the best use of my time, energy and resources today. And that part is making that information conscious now in a way that ever more efficiently guides my actions. I am surrounded with whatever I need to use those resources wisely and effectively. I know what to do and how to proceed.”

The Importance of Setting Meaningful Goals

Goal setting is not about having a ‘to do’ list, although specific action designed to move you closer to achieving major goals will be on that list. I am talking about setting goals as objectives that inspire you to achieve things truly meaningful to you. Having meaningful goals helps me to focus my energies in a positive direction and to use my time and energy wisely. However, in between projects, I can get sidetracked just as I was recently. So I need to set new goals as I just finished with my classes and conferences for the year. Without clear objectives and meaningful goals, I can wallow in non-productive rumination and activities. I am reminded of the folk saying

“Idleness is the devil’s playground.”

Looking for the Good

Keeping a keen awareness of all the good, the beautiful and the love that is the world creates balance. I need to hear some good news, and physically connect with people and hug them. This helps me to maintain hope and keep my concern about the bad things happening and worry about the future in check.

Years ago when I was going through separation and a divorce, I would ask people to tell me a joke. I really needed to laugh. And as they rattled through a joke or two, I did laugh. Then as I retold that joke to the next person, I laughed again. They laughed, and we all built up a repertoire that kept our spirits bouncing despite whatever challenges any of us were facing.

Random Acts of Kindness

Probably the fastest way to feel better and get out of your own head and put your problems aside for a while is to do something for someone else. It always helps me and just feels good to help others. I think I am sometimes the guardian angel for all those turtles trying to cross the road. So on my list of things to regularly do to keep myself grounded and centered, I am going to deliberately look for more ways to help somebody else.

Count Your Blessings

While I periodically count my blessings, I now commit to make it an essential part of my daily routine. Some people already do this as part of their evening prayers, or when offering a prayer before a meal. When stressed, it helps to remember that regardless of what is upsetting me or might happen in the future, for today I have a roof over my head, food to eat, running water and electricity. For today, I have many blessings. Then I just do what I can for that day. Planning helps. Action helps. Worry doesn’t.

Write a Letter of Appreciation

Recently, I came across the name of Martin Seligman, psychologist, former president of the American Psychological Association, author of the classic books Learned Optimism and Authentic Happiness, and founder of the Positive Psychology movement. He advocates writing a letter of appreciation to someone who has touched your life. This is not a new idea, but a very powerful one. I can tell you for myself, that receiving a sincere compliment or heartfelt thank you totally makes your day. And especially if it is written down where you can reread it, the message touches your heart again and again. Such a letter blesses the author as well as the receiver.


Seligman also recommends that you practice daily remembering  Three Good Things, also called the Three Blessings. Basically, in the evening, you write down three good things that happened that day. But this is more than a simple inventory of things for which you are grateful. He asks you to think of why that happened, or what traits about yourself allowed you to appreciate or enjoy those things. Thinking of good things increases your well-being and lifts depression. But thinking of what you did, or what it was that allowed you to notice or appreciate those things, makes you will recognize that you have the ability to bring happiness to yourself and others.  

“Go to where the problem isn’t.” 

I remember the quote above by Deepak Chopra. Deliberately move yourself physically or at least mentally to a place devoid of the problem. This is the point of a vacation. But at home, you might take yourself for a walk. Or just look around and focus on any good thing you see. It might a squirrel going after nuts, or a pair of them chasing one another up a tree. It could be the mist coming up off the low ground, or a brilliance of the fall leaves, or playing with your pets or children. I know someone who regularly buys flowers. Staring at a bouquet can be a meditation in itself. For me, I might just hang out with the piggies or the new born bunnies.

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Spend a moment of ABSOLUTE ATTENTION on something/anything else.

Break the pattern. Distract the mind. Do something fun or interesting.

Maybe you visit a friend or loved one or do something fun. Comedies help as does reading an interesting book, doing meditation, having a hot bath, or getting bodywork. I know someone who bounces on a trampoline. My son surfs. Skiing, mountain climbing, tennis and other sports force you to be totally focused in the moment. 

But wherever you are, day or night, there is some place you can go to at least in your mind. Think of any place or anyone that makes you feel good. Do you have photos handy? Are they hung up where you see them regularly? Take a moment to stare at the photo, and get in touch with the love that is there, the happy memory as if it is happening all over again.

 Use Music

Music is an instant state changer so keep handy both calming music and happy, upbeat ones to help you. The power of this is that when you go back to addressing issues, you are re-energized, able to make better decisions, and more effective action.


Lastly, life is about celebration and sharing of life with one another. Sing, dance, have a party. Or as a Yiddish toast goes, L’Chaim, which means:


If you think I can help you, here is my offer of  a free 30 minute phone session during the Months of December and January on any question relevant to hypnosis, stress management, mind-body healing, Reiki or dowsing. Call 434-263-4337.




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