Various news updates (again)

"Here it is, Mr. President": the Republicans publish their alternative budget. Obama's response?

Obama defended his budget at an online town hall meeting Thursday, saying, "It's a budget that cuts the things we don't need to make room for the investments we do, a budget that cuts the massive deficits we've inherited in half, by the end of my first term, and offers a blueprint for America's success in the 21st century."
Maybe the teleprompter can have Obama tell us exactly where there are "cuts" to "things we don't need"? I haven't heard of Obama (or any liberal, really) of ever cutting a program on the theory that "we don't need it".

Jason Kenney is being taken to court for being a whore.

The NHL has gone carbon neutral, in a charge led by Andrew Ferrence, Suzuki's little bum-boy in professional hockey. Well, okay, so some NHL players are paying $320 to "become carbon neutral". This is peanuts to these people (which is why letters about families spending $1700 on a night at an Oilers game doesn't faze them), but it serves as a good reminder that Ferrence, who had no problem taking a salary from oilsands workers as a Flame, is now trashing the oilsands and encouraging people to pay more money for fewer services.

A suicide bomber in Afghanistan accidentally blew up his fellow militants. I showed this to our health and safety coordinator at work (great gig by the way: an extra half-grand a month on a paycheque to be able to lecture people all the time) who asked a long-standing question regarding the female suicide bombers.
Men get 72 virgins in heaven for blowing themselves up, but what do the the women get?
My answer? They get fucked.

Canadian women receive too many ultrasounds. ECanadaNow! shows us a picture of a bloated stomach close up. Uh, that's not the picture you showed us on the Google News preview!