Analysis Essays for AP English Language (page 3)

By McGraw-Hill Professional
Updated on Mar 4, 2011

Writing the Body of the Essay

What Should I Include in the Body of This Analysis Essay?

Your strategy here should be the same as on the previous essay:

  1. Present your analysis and your prompt-related points.
  2. Adhere to the question.
  3. Use specific references and details from the passage.
  4. Use connective tissue—repetition, "echo words," and transitions—to establish coherence.

For more detail, refer back to the first discussion of this subject, earlier in this chapter.

To understand the process, carefully read the sample paragraphs below. Each develops one of the elements asked for in the prompt and cited in the introductory paragraph. Notice the specific references and the "connective tissue." Also notice that details that do not apply to the Alcott prompt are ignored.

This Paragraph Develops Diction

Throughout her account, Alcott's diction manipulates emotional responses in her readers. Words such as "earnest," "brave" and "faithful" establish John as a soldier worthy of sympathy, while "liberty and justice" rally the reader to his side with their patriotic connotations. Once the reader is involved, Alcott directs the tragic scene with words intended to bring forth more negative emotional responses: "suffering, tears, groans, and wept" emphasize John's pain. Yet, when the author says, "very touching," "fear vanished," and "my heart opened wide," the reader also wants to help John bear his pain. Alcott balances the negative side of death by using words that will make the reader more at ease during this uncomfortable passage. "Beautiful, gratitude and comfort" relax the reader and allow him to feel good about Alcott and her caregiving. Then, her direction changes as the young man is dying. He is now "cold, damp, white, and in agony." When the reader's heart is breaking, Alcott chooses words to lift the moment. The other men are "full of awe and pity," like the reader. In this way, the diction unites the reader, John, and Alcott. She makes certain that her concluding choices are comforting and positive. The "hard hour" has been "lightened." His expression is now "lovely and beautiful."

This Paragraph Develops Selection of Details

Louisa May Alcott chooses very special details to include in her development of scene and character. Dialog is one of these details which provides tangible insights into the character of John. The immediacy and reality of John's inevitable death is brought straightforwardly home to the reader in paragraphs 2 and 3. "You don't mean he must die, doctor?" "There's not the slightest hope for him." John's politeness and unassuming personality are observed when we hear him respond to the nurse in paragraph 6. And, his youth and sense of honor are heartbreakingly presented in the dialog in paragraph 7 and the end of paragraph 9. This sense of duty and honor is reinforced with his last words, "… tell them I did my best." Selection of details also help the reader to understand and feel the horror of war and its casualties. The pain and coldness of death is almost brutally punctuated in paragraph 5 where Alcott chooses to emphasize others not crying while John does. Alcott chooses to tell us about the letter from John's mother that was not delivered until after his death to add more pathos and irony to an already tragic scene. And, to select the detail of her placing this letter into the dead soldier's hands prior to his burial heightens the reader's emotional involvement.

This Paragraph Develops Imagery

It might be easy to become dulled to pain in a war hospital filled with dying men. To prevent this and to personalize the experience, Alcott uses imagery to re-create the events of John's death. The reader can feel that "every breath he draws is like a stab." The image of suffocation tightens our throats as we read about his pain, but we, like Alcott, must learn to "bottle up our tears" as we envision through her simile the nurse as mother and soldier as child. The metaphor of "a grey veil falling that no human hand can lift" softens the death of the soldier while heightening the finality. The concluding metaphor reassures the reader of salvation as she, the writer, allows John into the "dawn of that very long day which knows no night."

This Paragraph Develops Tone

As a result of her selection of details, diction, and imagery, Louisa May Alcott creates a scene with a predominant tone of sorrow. Re-creating the death scene of this young soldier, the author chooses those details that emphasize that pain and sorrow, both in herself and in her patient. She chooses to tell of the undelivered letter prior to the soldier's death, which further reinforces the reader's sense of sorrow and pity. Words like "suffering," "wept," "cold," "white," "in agony," help to convey and evoke sadness in the reader. And, the piteous situation is further developed when John's face is described as "lovely and beautiful" after his death. Imagery is also employed to create this tone of sorrow or sadness. Images of suffering, loss, and grief throughout, together with the final metaphor of "a grey veil falling that no human hand can lift," sadly portray the passing of this young Virginian blacksmith into eternity.


  • Write the body of your essay. Time yourself.
  • Allow 15–20 minutes to write your body paragraphs.

Here are two actual student essays with comments on each.

Student A

Louisa May Alcott experiences the worst part of war—suffering. Each day brings her in contact with new bloodied men brought in on stretchers, and only a few walk out. She has to live with their souls on her mind. One soldier, John, is described as a "brave" young man who fought for "liberty and justice." But, he is suffering. Alcott writes with an emotional tone about this soldier whom she helps "live" through his final moments. She obviously retells this story so that her readers can begin to understand the anguish of war.

This chronologically organized story spans two hours, from life to the end of life. It is said that no man should die alone, and Alcott helps this young man to die with the comfort of one who cares for him. Alcott's diction includes adjectives to describe his slow drift towards heaven with words like "his limbs grew cold, his face damp, his lips white …" These characteristics added together with the metaphorically imposed "grey veil" all lead up to his death. John's last words, "tell them that I did my best," symbolize both his life and his death. From then on, he said nothing and waited to enter his next life. Though he dies, Alcott hangs on as if trying to keep him from leaving. When she finally lets him go, four white marks stay on her hand, symbolizing John's lasting presence.

"… Many suffered, some swore, some groaned, most endured silently, but none wept." However, John was the exception. He let his emotions go, and his pain was answered by a caring nurse. Alcott appeals to the reader's emotions with such words as "crying," "suffering," "pity," and "awe," that express the extremes of feeling present in the hospital ward. A man in pain, about to die, should be pitied, especially when his life is about to be cut short. All his childhood dreams are to go unfulfilled. It is a waste of a "genuine man." Alcott uses this not only to tell of her experiences in war, but also to clarify for her reader the devastation of war. Alcott's balanced sentences enhance her story. In paragraph 7, John says, "This is my first battle; do they think it will be my last?" Alcott uses this question to illustrate the shock soldiers feel when faced with death. How can anyone believe a doctor who tells him he is dying. This shock, on the part of the soldier illustrates the human horror of war—people die!

Alcott also uses irony to emphasize the sadness of this boy's death. Just an hour after he passes on, another doctor brings in a letter for John. It is just too late. If he had seen it, maybe it would have put one last sparkle in his eyes before he shut them forever.

The ending of the passage summarizes the entire experience of so many of those who fought in the Civil War. Here was a young man who was very human. He was an average boy from Virginia who worked as a blacksmith. He had had a regular life and a regular job until this terrible war. That was when this regular life ceased to exist: John's and pre–Civil War America.

Having witnessed this young soldier waiting for the "dawn of that long day which knows no night," people should cry and be awe struck at the consequences of war.

Student B

In this excerpt from Hospital Sketches by Louisa May Alcott, she constructs her story to deeply move the reader by re-creating her personal experience as a nurse. Alcott's rhetorical strategies, including diction, imagery and selection of details, help to emphasize the pain and the sorrow which filled the U.S. Army hospital.

A reason why Alcott's excerpt was very successful in helping the reader understand the atmosphere during the Civil War is through her choice of words. The repetition of "hope," reveals that although she and John hoped that he would survive, it was inevitable that he would die, for he had been deeply hurt. Alcott reveals her sympathy and care for this man named John by asking the doctor how long he has to live. She also helps us understand that during the war precious lives were taken away. "The army needed men like John, earnest, brave and faithful." Alcott even reveals to her readers that having this companionship with John wasn't an easy job. She would have to answer heartbreaking questions, such as "Do they think it's going to be my last?" Telling a person that they won't live for long may be one of the hardest jobs Alcott may have had.

In addition to Alcott's diction, the details which she presents for her readers give the story an even more melancholy effect. She doesn't simply just state how many men were injured or how they were injured. Rather, she writes about her short encounter with the man named John. "John sat with head bent … and no outward sign of suffering, till … I saw great tears roll down and drop upon the floor." It's like this simple example shows the sadness and grief felt by this young man who was brave and fought for liberty. She reveals the soft side of a soldier. Alcott re-creates her experience by presenting the details of her relationship with John. "I sat down by him, wiped drops from his forehead, stirred air … waited to help him die." She even displays the gradual physical change of the dying human body. "His limbs grew cold, his face damp, his lips white …" She also includes a small conversation between John and an other injured man who, although a stranger, still had pity and sympathy for him. She also appeals to emotion by adding his mother in the story. She, as a friend, cuts his hair and kisses him for her instead at the grave.

Furthermore, the use of imagery also added to the re-creation of the Civil War scene. She describes John's pain as "every breath he draws is like a stab; for the ball pierced the right lung and broke a rib." With this quotation, it is evident that his pain was great. Alcott also shows the slow deterioration of John. "I saw a gray veil falling that no human hand can lift." This reveals that John's death is inevitable and there was nothing any human could do, but she could play the role of a friend. Alcott also displays the strength of John, how he wished to live, as "heavy breaths still tore their way up for a little longer."

Alcott describes her experience of the Civil War by telling a personal story. She reveals great love and generosity for John. Through this, it helps us understand the true power of human companionship.

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