The Only Action Your HP Fax Machine Might Get This Year Is a Deadly FireS

Not only do fax machines still exist, but HP sells them, and the government is forcing a recall of nearly one million of the obsolete things. Why? They might burn down your house—ancient and deadly, like a velociraptor.

The official U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission recall cites the HP fax 1040 and 1050 models, which, judging by the photos, are either in your attic or local landfill by now. But if you've still got one hooked up to a wall for some reason, beware!



So, how did you injure your hand, man?
Oh, I burned it on a defective fax machine.
I want a divorce.

Is your HP fax machine on fire right now? I advise you to go check—if so, HP will provide you the world' most insulting recall compensation: "a rebate on the purchase of an authorized replacement HP fax machine or a partial rebate of certain HP ink jet printers." [CPSC]