Monday, November 19, 2007


About two years ago a close friend tricked me into seeing a scary movie. I hate seeing any kind of scary movie, so the trick was actually necessary to get me to the theater (my friend also paid for my ticket). I sat there ready to be the one wimp in the audience who screamed, jumped, and clung to her friend because I was sure everyone else was not such a coward as I was. Then Cursed began.
Let me set it up for you. Christina Ricci portrays a young woman who has become a caretaker for her younger brother after both of their parents died, and is dealing with a boyfriend who is being cold and distant at this time. One night they are involved in a car crash and attacked by some animal. After this attack they both figure they are fine and just try to move on with their lives. However, in the days that follow both of them start experiencing strange things that they can’t explain. The brother, after doing some research, realizes that a werewolf attacked them and the only way to save them is to kill the werewolf that infected them.
Actually, now that I have written that out the movie doesn’t even sound that scary. However, I have heard that Wes Craven is good at scaring people and, as he was the director of this movie, I thought I had just cause to be nervous. Yet soon after the film started my friend and I both realized that the scary thing about this movie was the fact that they actually thought it would be scary. It was funny in a very bad kind of way, but not scary. Sure there were parts that made you jump, but it did not scare you. They even had the typical scary movie things going, e.g. ominous music that crescendos at the point you are supposed to get scared, but I think they left out the part that was supposed to scare you.
One really scary thing was the horrible plot of the movie. I was scared that this script actually got optioned. I still have nightmares sometimes thinking that if they made that into a movie what is going to come next? Joshua Jackson, who plays the distant boyfriend, is described as having been a ladies man, until very recently. He shows up here and there in the movie but just gets through the scene other than acting in it. The plot was so contrived that it was ridiculous. Of course the werewolf is going to be someone who the brother and sister trusted and would never suspect in a million years. I mean that was just ridiculous and I actually felt insulted that there was NO ORIGINALITY in the plot. They must have thought that I was like a lot of moviegoers who doesn’t really think about what they are watching. Guess what? THEY WERE WRONG!!!!!!
One thing that usually angers me about going to see bad movies is the fact that I actually spent money to see it. However, in this case that did not happen, but I still ended up liking some bad movies that I paid to see more than this one.
Normally at this point in my review I would try to sum things up and give you my rating in a clever way. This movie does not deserve it. -16. Shame on Wes Craven! Yeah, that’s right you don’t even deserve a proper conclusion.


jbodster said...

Wow. I'm glad I paid for that ticket or I might have lost a friend that fateful night.
You forgot to mention that the "werewolf" looked like nothing more than an actor in a hairy suit. I think Wes Craven was trying to go for humor but it just ended up making the movie completely and utterly stupid. I mean, I always enjoy watching shallow movies with no meaning but even I was insulted by this one.

Moshe Reuveni said...

I would argue that the time you've wasted was worth much more than the ticket price...

Your Racist Friend said...

I don't know gave this movie a -16, which means dental surgery is more fun. And yet, you gave no real examples of what it did aside from being a bit predictable, and not scary.