Monday, August 31, 2009

Half Baked

We have officially entered week 20 of pregnancy. You know what that means?
We are half way there.
My goodness that scares the day lights out of me. I am not sure where the last 20 weeks have gone, but I'm sure the next 20 will come at the speed of light.

I'm sorta content-o where Hill and I are right now. He gives me the ol' left right in my tum to let me know he's there. I am not 100% miserable in my body yet. No real nausea. A wee bit tired, but nothing to complain about. We are getting good sleep at night. No big aversions to anything.

I did have a little hormonal deterioration (not quite a breakdown) today, but hind sight it was really nothing to cry about. Ok, we'll add this story to the hormonal list.

You see Chip has to go to Oxford this week, before he left town he came up to my work so we could say our goodbyes and I just started getting a little teary eyed. He was so sweet because he'd done all the laundry and tended to the dogs and made my life just a little bit easier. Meanwhile I'm telling him bye and my co-worker who I've worked side by side with for 2 years is packing his office to transfer to a different department. I felt really sad, so I got overwhelmingly weepy (ok, I secretly cried). There was no real reason - Chip will be back in 3 days and Jeremy will be 3 buildings away. I had to get a grip.

After Chip left and I helped my ol' side kick take a few things to his new digs I returned to my office to find that happiness showed up! My friend Marsha with her sweet smile, rotel chicken spaghetti and this..........warm banana nut bread.

If you can't tell in the photo I couldn't wait until I got home to eat a slice.

Marsha, without even knowing it, made my day that really wasn't as bad as my hormones made it out to be, just a little brighter.

When I left work it was a pretty day outside so I rolled down my windows and turned up the radio and sang really really loud. That always makes me feel better. I even considered unwrapping the banana nut bread in the car and eating it like a candy bar, no fork, no plate, just one hand on the wheel and one hand holding the bread and my mouth. Then I decided that would be inappropriate and quite pig-ish. Then I wished I had a fork to eat the chicken spaghetti as I drove home, but again, I refrained.

I did however end up eating the above mentioned goodness for dinner and dessert. Yum-freaking-o. Thank you Marsha you are an angel and a wonderful friend. I love you too manies!

(P.S. my blog title cracks me up because I just watched Scent of a Woman the other night. 10 points if you understand that)

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Fighting In Utero

So today was a bad day. Not because of work or trying to catch up from last week, but because Hill and I had our first fight. How do you fight with an unborn child? It's completely my fault and I deserve to be beaten up from the inside out.

You see last night I just wasn't that hungry. I drank a glass of orange juice and later had a bowl of Blue Bell Homemade Vanilla Ice Cream with Chocolate syrup then went to bed. When I woke up this morning I had a big non alcoholic mimosa (oj and sprite) so by 11:15 it hit me like a ton of bricks, I was famished. I had psyched myself up for Pizza Hut for lunch. I'd been wanting their buffet for like 2 weeks and finally had to give in. I called up my friend JJ (who is also with child) and said how about the Hut? She said sure...let's do 12:30. No prob. I could make it an hour and 15 minutes. No prob. Well about 11:45 is when trouble started. My stomach let out such a huge growl like I've never heard before. It was one of three things either Hill screaming at me or Hill eating my insides or worse....a monster.

I got concerned. I only could think about my poor baby. I have deprived him of nutrients. I selfishly didn't eat anything once I got hungry mid-morning because I wanted to save room for dessert pizza and cinnamon sticks. Then I started thinking about how scary for him. He can hear everything. What if he wasn't screaming at me or eating my insides but heard the roar of my tum tum and thought it was a monster? I mean the growl of my stomach even caught me off guard and I'm 29 years old not 20 weeks old.

So I felt bad for my little man. In order to make it up to him I called JJ and asked if we could meet a little before 12:30. She agreed and we met. I ate a huge salad, ate pizza, then more pizza, then had dessert pizza and cinnamon sticks and 2 Pepsi's. I know, that's a ton of food, but hush - - it was to appease Hill for the trauma he had endured. I thought I was making it up to him. Little did I know that would just make him mad. I had withered him away to nothing then suffocated him with greasy carbs. He had every right to be mad.

I have suffered too. I have taken on the fiery pits of my stomach as it tried to rise to the top of my throat. I have taken every deserved Karate Kid move that Hill knows. I have taken the unsettled pizza stomach since lunch. I have uncomfortably endured the rumblin' in my tumblin' this afternoon.
You win, Hill. I will never selfishly not eat because I'm not hungry. I will never over stuff myself until misery for us both. I vow these things as your mother. Now please, mommy loves you and just wants everything to be happy. We can start anew tomorrow. Do you want me to sing to you? I'll take the nudge you just gave me as a big "spare me lady."
Love you!

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Hill's First Monogram

I have so many talented friends and one of them brought me ...I mean Hill... his first monogrammed burp cloth. How fun and exciting to see his name written out!
What a fun Ole Miss 'H' that his daddy and grandpa will love so much that maybe they will even burp him? Or change a diaper....or stay up during the night with him...ok I won't press my luck.
Anyway, thank you dear Cindy at Just Sew Sweet Designs you are too kind. I love it and you! Hill even gave a good kick kick flip to show his appreciation. He knows it took a lot for you to sew that Rebel material on there for him. He wouldn't be opposed to an MSU one just so he could spit up on it. Ha! Kidding! Not really.

Monday, August 24, 2009

Shopping While Pregnant

I should have taken a picture of my closet before I tried to straighten it up. I think World War III took place there. It was a tornadic mess because I got so mad at everything that doesn't fit anymore. I went shopping Sunday and found out a lot about myself and being pregnant. For those of you that have yet to have this experience grab a pen and paper to take notes.

1) Take deodorant. You need to take deodorant because for some reason every maternity store I went into A/C unit was not mechanically equipped to support the hot flashes that you endure when taking your clothes off to put more clothes on to see how they fit just to get mad and worked up while an over head heat lamp beams down on you and you get frustrated. Even the cute skinny non pregnant sales associate had the nerve to say, "hmmm, it's a little warm in here." Really? Really, 95lbs girl that has not been trying on pants that a family of 4 could easily fit into with sauna lights beaming down on you as you are gasping for breath ? I digress. Just take deodorant or wear your bathing suit. It's a workout.

2) Take a towel. This will assist with step 1 and also to help wipe away the tears when you go to try on maternity clothes that are suppose to be your 'normal' size that don't fit. I'm a big girl, no need to deny it. So here I am, oh cute jeans. I need some jeans! I will get the XL to try on. My poor thighs will never be the same. They just laughed at me as I tried so diligently to force the denim over them. I literally sat on the bench in the changing room while I dripped with sweat and asked myself as I tried to regroup........ok, so I'm in a maternity store, XL is the largest size they make and it doesn't fit. Uhhhh Where do I buy clothes? What do I do? Cry. This is where the towel comes into play. Use it to wipe off your sweaty body from forcing on clothes and wiping away those tears. Then cry a little more when the sales associate explains to you that they make plus size for maternity. Shut up. So, not that I'm whale-ish enough you mean to tell me that they have bigger sizes for big people who are initially big but get bigger. Take a moment to absorb that. So I went to that section and found a pair of jeans. They fit. I was going to be ok, my ego was just a little beaten up but that's ok. It is better than walking around naked. You all will just get tired of seeing me wear these jeans everyday but just think of the alternative. Naked.

3) Wear tennis shoes. My ankles didn't swell one bit. No kankles for me, which is rare these days. I guess I wear my flip flops 24-7 and they just don't give the support I need.

4) Go to Babies R Us first. This should actually be step 1. I have discussed this with a couple of friends before on how in order to work there you must be between the ages of 12 and 22. I'm not sure if their target market is the overwhelming population of teen mothers or preparing your patience to be a parent for kids immature antics. I made the mistake of going there last for the day, after the heat stroke from trying on clothes and my sense of humor had deteriorated. Here I am bee-bopping in the crib section when a cute little freckled employee thought it would be funny to tell a grandma who is overly excited about buying her first grandchild's crib for her house that he was sorry, they don't sell furniture on Sunday. She was confused....he thought he was being funny....and she thought he was being serious -- it was just annoying. For those of you confused......they sell furniture on Sunday.

5) Get a Belly Band! I cannot stress this enough. Buy a belly band. It's such a wonderful heaven sent piece of panty hose material that makes all your clothes fit again. You don't even have to be pregnant. It's so simple and so great that I wish I'd have bought it a long time ago or better yet, invented it. I can walk around with my pants undone and you won't even know it. Chip asked if it was ok for my zipper to be undone too and I said probably not, but mine is because I can. This thing keeps all of my unmentionables under wraps. It is so special it makes me feel like I'm secretly cheating on my husband. Heck, I wish I knew about this contraption pre pregnancy when I was between sizes. This is right up there with the Mommy Boppy Pillow. It's a must have. I love you belly band, you are my best friend.

I hope you all have learned the do's and don'ts of shopping during pregnancy. This was my first go round and what I took away from the experience. If anything, maybe I have helped you avoid a little less stress during this wonderfully awkward time of your life. Good Luck.

It's A Boy!

I only have a second to post, but promise to catch up on here later this week once I get mentally back on track.

Just an update in case you missed the text, facebook, or shout from the roof top. Chip and I are having a boy!
Charles Hill Hawkins IV
We will call him
Hill Hawkins
We were so excited, we just cried and cried. Now I'm scared to death because I've not heard one story of Chip as a calm normal little boy. Please pray for my sanity. (I will try to figure out how to post sonogram pics...Susan help)
Another thank you to everyone in the world that I know. Each of you were there for us last week during the loss of Chips mother and we couldn't have made it without you. Your continual prayers for our family is appreciated because as Chip said best, "life without her has just begun for us." That's the part that has not set in yet.
I told you all I'd have stories of this past week. Tuesday after Adrienne passed my baby was more active than ever. It was almost uncomfortably active. Chip felt certain that his mom was in there poking around to spread those legs apart to see if we were having a boy or girl. I don't doubt it one bit. Jane Claire said her baby was doing the same thing! She must have been in there checking out her little girl, Adrienne Brooks. That silly Snooks!

Wednesday, August 19, 2009


To me, the Spanish language is so beautiful. One of my favorite words to say, besides sacapunta (pencil sharpener) - which is not so much a pretty word, just fun to blurt out..........anyway one of the most beautiful words is amistad. Ahm-e-stahd.

Amistad means friendship and I have certainly seen the fruits of it's beauty lately. This post is brief, but just a quick thank you to all of my amigos who have prayed, cried and laughed with us through this trying time where amistad is most important.

I am sure a ton of funny stories will come out of this emotional time, Adrienne wouldn't have it any other way. I will gather them and be sure to post the hilarity of our lives to you.

Through all of this sorrow Chip has made sure that all plans for our doctors appointment stay on track. We go tomorrow at 9:45 to HOPEFULLY find out if we are having a Hill Hawkins or a Catherine Henderson Hawkins.

Wish us luck.
Love ya,

Monday, August 17, 2009

"But everything happens for a reason"

If you look at the top of my page you see it says

No Really....This Is My Life
Life is funny, but everything happens for a reason
My blog is called "No Really...This Is My Life" because there is always something crazy going on and I felt it appropriate because half the time I feel that it could only happen to me. My url is "truly my life" because I wouldn't expect anything less than truly random stuff to happen to me. The one part of my blog that probably means the most to me and brings everything full circle is the "but everything happens for a reason" line.

I've always said that, my whole life. I've never understood it, but have always said it. It's one of those things that when someone says it to you you sometimes want to reach across and slap them. Why do we say that? "Oh well, everything happens for a reason." Blah blah blah.
But it's true. Things do happen for a reason.

When I was 14 and my step dad died, what was the reason? When I was 17 and my best friend died, what was the reason? When I was 19 I was in a bad car wreck, what was the reason? I can sit here and think 100 miles an hour on how each of these life altering events has changed and formed me to do things I may not have ventured to do or make decisions that have brought me to where I stand today. Everything happens for a reason. Bad things happen for a reason. I don't dwell on these awful things, I think of them often, but reflecting on them only makes me stronger. They are stepping stones, if you will. It's healthy, there is no hatred, there is no remorse only what might have beens. We all do the, "But what if's," we are human.

Lets rewind for a minute. Most of you know this story, but lets rehash. Chip and I moved to Kosciusko for his job in August 2005. It's not an unknown fact that I really disliked it here. In April 2006 we married (I know, if you do the math we lived in sin.) Our first 6 months of marriage was hell because we were both working from home living in the ghetto with a broken A/C in the heat of summer driving each other crazy. Then in October, two hours before we closed on our non ghetto house Chip was relocated to Alabama. I stayed in Kosciusko in the new house and he came home on the weekends. Something kept us here for no real reason. I was a poo poo head about everything but was coping. I switched jobs in June 2007 which made my life a whole lot happier since I had people, but I was still stuck here with myself and I had to suck it up. Chip still commuting back and forth. Then eight months later (Feb 2008) Adrienne was diagnosed with a brain tumor.

I will never forget it, I was in the shower when it hit me (God is funny like that.) He was doing his Glory as I was in all of my Glory. Anyway, my mind was cleared and the path was laid. It all made sense. Everything happened for a reason. Chip and I were sent to Kosciusko not to make my life miserable at all. I was the problem. I was taking everything the wrong way. He knew what He was doing. He brought Chip and I to Kosciusko to settle and care for our loved ones. He brought us here to be with our new found friends and family so they could help us through this time. I wasn't being punished at all, it was just me being impatient. I was being rewarded by Him to be able to have the opportunity to grow and learn and be loved by new people.

Some things I will never know why they happened, and maybe it's because I'm just too impatient to see or wait for the whole big picture. I am sure I know why we were lead here to Koz. I'm sure I know why God said it was time for us to finally have a baby. I'm sure of so many more things now because I can accept the not knowing of why everything happens for a reason.

But that's just one way that God has opened my eyes through Adrienne being his tool. I was able to understand these hard times in a different light. I cannot fathom in my lifetime how many others have been blessed by Adrienne and her works. That was her mission in life, she knew it and she has certainly done it bigger and better than I think even God imagined.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Gratitude to the Land of Koz

I found out I have a lot of readers this weekend, secret stalkers. Oh the pressure!
(she says with the back of her hand on her forehead like Scarlet O'Hara)

I don't really post on the weekend but the opportunity is here and I'm not sure when I will have another chance to post the rest of the week. Things are still in the air with Adrienne. We are in waiting.

I've enjoyed the out pour of visitors in the ICU waiting room. The friends that have hung out, some until the wee hours, just chit chatting, laughing, crying and even just sitting in silence. You know Chip and I have come to terms with the situation. We have said our goodbyes, given her kisses, held her hand and run our hands through her hair. It's more of a comfort to us than to her I'm sure. We are never truly prepared, but who really ever is?

This may be a monumental moment. I have things in my head to say, but no words to say them. I just can't seem to relay the meaning of friendship and how wonderful it is. When I married Chip 3 years ago I married more than just my soul mate, I married an entire town. I'll be the first to openly admit that Kosciusko was nothing less than culture shock to me. I'll be the first to step up and say I cried many many days and nights knowing my husband brought me here and dropped me off to go work in Alabama and I knew no one except his family. Yet, because of his phenomenal family and friends, and the wonderful people of this tiny foreign village taking me in, I am a better person.

I realize I've known some of you longer than 3 years, but most of you I have not. It's hard to believe that these friendships I've formed are so strong in such a short time. Sometimes I don't understand why you guys want to be my friend. I know my abrupt personality and broad open mindedness and need to play devils advocate at times can be a hard pill to swallow. I speak my mind more than the average bear, but those of you that are around me often carry a salt lick around because most of the time a grain of salt won't work.

I appreciate you all taking me in and making me feel like I've been a Hawkins since birth. My family back in Texas appreciates you all taking me in and making me a part of your family too. I don't just mean making me a part of the Hawkins family, but your family, the stalkers who are reading this without posting comments and even those of you that do post comments. To me friends are family. So, if you find me in your house eating food out of your fridge it's because I think of you as a sibling or parent.

Chip and I are expecting our first child. I've always heard the saying that it takes a village to raise a child. Well there is no other village I would rather have raise my bambino - - and Lord knows any kid of ours needs all the rearing it can get!

Love to you all. Keep us in your prayers. Be sure to pray for my moms safe flight tonight as she comes to be with us during this not so fun time.

I leave you on a happy note.
Only in the Land of Koz will you see this cruising town on a Saturday night.
Welcome...please come visit us any time!
You sure do have a purdy mouth! (queue banjo)

A pick up truck pulling a trailer with a 4wheeler and a miniature horse on the back.

Friday, August 14, 2009


Wow my friends, I don't think I've ever in my life been so glad to see a Friday. This has felt like 5 weeks rolled into one week. Our friends are probably the best friends ever. I mean seriously our friends should win awards and trophy's for being Heaven sent. There are no words or explanation to comprehend the wonderful people in our lives.

Adrienne had a good night last night. Very few seizures is my understanding. She deserved a good night sleep after at least 3 awful nights.

I really believe that God doesn't give you more than you can handle but he truly tested me yesterday. As you can imagine my cell phone right now is my life line. I need it to keep in touch with my husband and worried friends. Well yesterday during one of my 40987365 trips to the bathroom (pregnancy symptom) umm it fell in the toilet. This was less than 24 hours after it survived falling out of my purse in the parking lot at work. It died. It bit the dust. Well I guess there was really no dust involved more like toilet water. I said a few choice words that felt appropriate at the moment then gathered my cool.

So as I'm questioning Him (I know I shouldn't). I say, Lord, Really? I mean, really? Now? Then it was like he wanted to say SIKE! Cheer up, but he knew my phone was junk and sent me Joyce's phone that she doesn't use. Again, Joyce saved the day.

Now every time the phone rings I am looking around like SOMEONE ANSWER THAT PHONE! Because I 'm not use to the ring. So if you call, and I don't answer....I will get back with you.

Keep up the prayers and love to you all! Thanks for being the best friends ever.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Clean House

Yesterday I get a call from my mother in law, Joyce (Chip's stepmom). When she calls my phone she is calling from my house. I was so confused, I hear this is called pregnancy brain. Anyway, she and the cleaning lady had been at my house cleaning all day. What! Why? I mean I know my house is a wreck and I haven't done laundry in like 2 weeks. What gave it away? Chip wearing the same shirt 4 days in a row? He does that anyway. I was pleasantly surprised! What a God send! She knew what a hellacious past week and a half we'd had and it was just so unexpectedly wonderful. Then it hit me.....Oh no. She's at my

Some people would think oh no they saw my holey granny panties! Some would say oh wow, all of those dishes in the sink. My owning 3 inside dogs may have thought about all the dog hair needing to be swept up. Or maybe even the bathtub looking like a filthy Cuban john boat used to cross the ocean to get to America. Not me.......the first thing that popped in my head was MY BRA!

Who cares about a stinking over the shoulder boulder holder, Right? And I mean these suckers are boulders, thanks pregnancy. Well there is a story about the bra laying out on my bathroom sink and here I go......always telling on myself. Since my blog is titled "No Really...This is my Life" I only feel it appropriate to let you know how my life truly is. Here it is guys, I'm laying it on the line.

Every morning I take my prenatal vitamin. Well, I don't take it at home because I have to let my stomach settle. You see, I wake up every morning with my sinus' draining down my throat (another pregnancy symptom) this causes me to cough, usually pretty hard. I don't know how to "hark it up" as Chip would say, so I cough. My stomach gets queasy from coughing so hard, then I brush my teeth. Chip is to the point where he told me yesterday - Seriously, stop brushing your teeth. When I brush my teeth it inevitably sets off this gag reflex. I don't have to brush hard, I don't have to brush my tongue, I just insert toothbrush and toothpaste into my mouth and gag. So you understand that my morning has to be strategically planned. Nothing to eat or drink before brushing of the teeth. Then about 30 minutes afterwards my stomach is still weak so I have to take my vitamin at work.

Ok, now you know the preface to the story. Continuing on about the bra. Everyday I wear dress clothes. Skirts, suits, etc. Most of the time they have no pockets. This causes a problem for my prenatal vitamin. I can't take it just to throw it up so I have to stick it in a special place where I won't forget to take it to work with me. This special place is my bra.

I looked for a picture online to post of what my vitamin looks like, but could not find one. I assume it's because if you saw what a PreNexa vitamin looked like you wouldn't want to take it. It's a vanilla smelling, gelly textured, brown horsepill. To put it so bluntly it looks like a terd.

So morning before last I stuck my brown vitamin in my bra and went about my morning. Went about my day. Went about my night. I forgot to take it! So when I went to get ready for bed that night I took off my bra and there was a smushed brown dookie stain in my bra. So tired, I couldn't even function to crack up laughing at my absent mindedness; I took a shower and would deal with it later.

Well shoot! I didn't know that people were coming to my house to clean! So you could imagine why my mind wasn't on dishes, dog hair, holey panties...but on my skid marked bra laying there all big and open on my bathroom counter. When I got home I saw it in the laundry room. They washed it. I felt the need to call and explain. Joyce laughed so hard and then Chip, Jane Claire, Meryl and Joyce all proceeded to pick on me. I don't think that this story will ever leave my life, at least not for a long long time.

Only me. At least I am able to laugh at my own stupidity. Therefore you are not laughing at me, you are laughing with me. Right?

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Special Request

I usually don't post in the middle of the day, nor do I normally make special requests of my readers. I have a favor to ask of each of you. Please stop for one second right now and say a prayer for my mother in law, Adrienne. Pray for her strength, pray for her healing, pray for her well being. Pray for Jane Claire as she travels to Kosciusko and pray for Chip as he helps everyone stay focused on what needs to be done.

For those of you that know my mother in law you are aware of how lucky I am, how lucky all of us are, to have her in our lives. We all wish there was something different, something more we could do but our charge is still the same as it was 18 months ago. Pray. Miracles subsided the unthinkable once before who is to say it won't again.

Please keep my family in your prayers. Please ask others to do the same. The more prayers the better, in my opinion.

She is at home now and as you can read on her CaringBridge they are sending a home health person over to see what can be done about her medication. Chip will update on there as often as he can.


Grilled Corn and Feta Salad

Yum-o! I want to eat this now! Even so early in the morning. Chip, Fire up the grill!

Does anyone have any fresh zucchini, corn, tomatoes, basil and parsley? Oh wow can you imagine the superb flavors in your mouth right now? Since being pregnant I really want veggies more than meat. Even for breakfast. I hope that my kid ends up like me and not like Chip with his/her eating tookieness.
I've not made this before, but if the thought of it keeps brewing in my head today then I will have it by the end of the week! I will let you know how it turns out. Again, if any of my local friends have a garden or grandparents with a garden I will pay you for your goods. I really really dislike our produce selection at our local supermarkets.
1 whole Medium Zucchini, Halved Lengthwise
2 ears Corn, Shucked
2-½ Tablespoons Olive Oil, Divided
¾ pounds Assorted Ripe Tomatoes, Chopped Into 1" Chunks
1 can Roasted Green Chilies, Finely Chopped
2 Tablespoons Chopped Fresh Basil
2 Tablespoons Chopped Fresh Parsley
Juice Of 1 Large Lime (about 2 Tablespoons)
¼ pounds Feta (or Goat) Cheese, Crumbled
Salt And Freshly Ground Pepper

Preparation Instructions
1. Preheat a grill over medium heat.2. Brush the zucchini and corn cobs with ½ tablespoon of the olive oil. Grill for about 5 minutes, turning occasionally, until the vegetables are lightly charred and soft.3. Set aside to cool.4. Combine the remaining 2 tablespoons olive oil, tomatoes, green chillies, herbs, lime juice, and cheese in a large mixing bowl.5. Chop the zucchini into 1/2” half moons, cut the corn kernels off the cobs, and add both to the bowl.6. Season with salt and pepper.7. Stir to blend, and serve warm or at room temperature.
* Salad tastes best if served when prepared (flavours intensify too much if refrigerated).

Prep Time 10 Minutes
Cook Time 5 Minutes
Difficulty Easy
Servings 6

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Sweet Dreams

I got a call from my best friend Angela in Southaven that her little Dinky Dog passed away today. I just wanted you guys to keep her in your prayers because it's hard to lose a family member. I truly can't imagine, but I know that my little one eyed nephew sure loved him some Foxy Mama. He use to pretend to pee on her to flirt. Katie use to tattle tell on him for things he didn't even do. I swear those silly kids. I sure will miss my Stinky Dinky - he had a great life and an even greater mama.

Speaking of silly kids. Chip was like a kid in a candy store this afternoon in Oxford when he had the opportunity to go and watch the Rebels practice. He sent me a text and all it said was, "on the field with the football players and Houston Nutt!!!" I replied back and said, "No way" and of course the reply I got was, "WAY!" I asked him if he thought they would let him be the water boy? He never got back to me. He is super stoked about this season and only plans on missing one game which is in another state far far away or something. I will be big and pregnant and unpredictable so I make no promises. You all know that if we go to a Bowl game I will be without husband and doctor to birth this baby come January. It's ok, I guess I can take one for the team.

I had a great time at Cosmo tonight. I really enjoy hanging out with every single one of those girls. We have a lot of wonderful new members and I think we will have a great year! Good stuff, good friends and always good conversation.

So lets talk about my complexion and how I look like a 9th grader that should have started school this week with monster zits that have a heartbeat of their own. Gross! I have two big ol zit-olas that require their own zip code and currency. One is located directly in the middle of my 'God said Shhh!' Do you know where that is? It's that divot between your upper lip and nose where God placed his finger when you were born and said, Shhhh. Then it left that dent there. There ya go, your history lesson for the day. Don't ever say I haven't taught you anything. The other Mount Everest is on my chin in the place where you put your hand when doing the fist to chin Glamour Shot pose. Again, you know what I'm talking about. If not then go watch Napoleon Dynamite. I am at a loss with these monsters. There is no end in sight for them to go away. I guess this too shall pass or maybe I can become an under cover 9th grade narcotic agent at the high school. When life gives you sour lemons make lemon tarts! or something tasty.

Night Night. Katie and I are going to bed. Have sweet dreams.

I am a cantaloupe and Katie loves me

If you are on facebook then last night you read that my cantaloupe was full of Wendy's salad and I did end up going and eating Chippy's Rice Krispies.

I get the What to Expect emails every day and it said my uterus is the size of a cantaloupe. I really really really wanted to take pictures with a cantaloupe but my camera is lost. It's around the house somewhere......but that requires my cleaning to find it. So sorry that is not happening.

Speaking of cantaloupe, Katie Lou loves cantaloupe more than the average dog, but her favorite is watermelon. You have never seen a dog go spastic until you have seen Katie Lou smell watermelon. It's her favorite food in the entire world. More than steak. Wait, you have to understand that my dogs don't eat people food. They can eat fruit and veggies, but no meats except for on their birthday they get a hamburger. I guess you could say they are vegetarians when it comes to people food. Katie has eaten shrimp before, but prefers cocktail sauce on it. She eats salad, but only with dressing. Foster really dislikes cucumber - - have you ever seen a dog spit something out they hated, it's hilarious. Foxy just tastes things and then decides if she likes it. Usually she doesn't. Here are pics of my babies

I read an article yesterday about Dogs are Smarter than Toddlers. If you have met Kate Lou then you all know that I am going to say, I already knew that. Katie is something else. She's not a dog, but she's not a human.....she may a doman, a manog, a hug. Whatever she is she's my little smarty pants with a cocky attitude and I wouldn't trade her for the world. For the past 9 years I've been living with a loud potty mouthed kissy face who calls the shots. I'd say that she knows as much as a border collie or poodle hands down. Anyone that has met my Lou knows exactly what I'm talking about. It's hard to explain. She is literally a two year old that communicates through actions.

She knows word recognition like Go, Car, Food, Ride, Water, Mommy's Bed, Inside, Outside, TT/PooPoo, Kisses, she knows the names of ALL of her toys, Mommy, Chippy, Foster, Foxy Mama, Look, Night Night, Mama Lou, amongst others.

She's very observant if the other dogs are out of food or water she is their communicator, their Speaker of the House. She will go in their room and pick up their bowl and drop it causing commotion, then bark. Half the time if it wasn't for her I'd assume Chip had fed them, but no, Katie Lou lets me know real fast. She takes care of everyone. Katie has a different bowl in a different room than Foster and Foxy. She likes to eat one of two bed or on the couch. When you get her food for her you must follow her so she can tell you where she wants to eat because forget sitting or standing on the floor to eat, she wants plush surfaces to dine on.

Thank goodness I broke her from having to eat by hand....MOM! That took about a year. When I went abroad to Europe for half the year I came home and Katie had my mom fooled. Katie said she needed to eat on the couch and be hand fed each meal and would only eat the colors of the Benefuls she wanted and turn her head if you tried to give her a hard kibble. She's a handful I tell you. She also throws a fit when you bring out her t-shirt. She WANTS to wear it.

When it is time for bed she is a lot like me. She just gets up and goes without telling anyone. You could have a house full of people, but it doesn't matter. Into Mommy's bed she goes. She is a grouch pot when she's sleepy, just like her mommy. The difference is that I usually bite and Katie does not.

The mornings are Katie's favorite....but she is always a sleepy head if you wake her up before she's ready. Katie LOVES to give kisses, abundant amounts of kisses in the mornings. I usually get them as soon as my eyes open and Chip asks for them and she'll go to his side and give him a couple too. Sweet girl. When I am sad she kisses my whole face, she thinks it makes me feel better and usually it does. She's my little guardian. She too is very emotional. She's intrigued by most things and expresses it through her human looking eyes. When she is sad, her body language lets you know she's been let down. She's also a great listener.

What are her favorite things to do? Her leash is her security blanket and she loves to "fight" with Chippy. When you hold her you have two positions, on your hip like a little kid so she can see around or upside down on her back with her head flopping over so she can be silly.

My Katie Goose is a trip, she is one of a kind that is for sure. She keeps me and Chip on our toes and has us both wrapped around her finger, I mean paw. She knows it, she thrives on it, she eats it up. We let her. She's my first born and I pray that she doesn't take a back seat when the baby comes. I will work really hard to prevent that. It makes me sad to think about. If you haven't met my Lou Lou please come do so. Maybe you will see what I find so hard to explain about her being more human than dog.

Monday, August 10, 2009

Big Days

First of all, I want to wish my mom a happy day of birth. She turned 25 on Saturday and said she had a great day! I wish I could have been there to hang out, but I will see you in 10 days! Can't wait!

Do you all know what today is? Of course you don't! Today is the day that in 2005 my boyfriend proposed to me. Yup, we were young and crazy and stayed up late and talked and seemingly had no worries. The proposal was so perfect.....for us. Nothing planned, nothing really romantic, nothing abnormal, just a night hanging out on the back patio in Oxford. We'd been together for 4 years. Which breaks down to 94725 years in relationship years.

I had gone out with some girlfriends for one of their birthdays that night and came home where Chip was hanging out on the patio. We were talking about how long we'd been together amongst other worldly things and then out of the blue Chip said, well would you marry me? I said well sure. Because I thought that we were having general conversation and I answered in a nonchalant way. He said, no Rachel, like will you marry me? Still confused if we are hypothetically speaking or maybe it's my numbness because we'd been together for 94725 years......I said ummm, what? He said it for the third time, Will You Marry Me? Me, still a little bit taken back said, Seriously? I mean, YES.

There was no ring, there was no down on one knee, no talking to my parents first, there was no Eiffel Tower; just me, the plastic patio furniture, Chip and Katie Lou. Perfect! I wouldn't have changed one second of it. Not even the fact that we both jumped up and hugged and Katie Lou barked at Chip like DON'T TOUCH MY MOMMY (she still does that by the way.) I called my mom and since it was like 11:30 at night I didn't call anyone else until the next day. Then of course everyone was confused because I'd tell them I was getting married and they look at my naked finger like.....ummmm sure you are honey. Whatever helps you sleep better at night. Then turn around and say, Nurse, give her her meds please.

That went on for like 2 weeks until Johnny Sides made my dreams come true with the most special beautiful ring in the history of rings. I love my ring. I love my ring not because it has diamonds and I love diamonds but because these aren't just your go to the jewelry store and pick out a ring type diamonds. These are Chip's grandmothers diamonds. They are all different sizes and shapes and are beautifully special beyond words. Chip and his grandmother were so close and I hate I never had the opportunity to meet her.

In the mornings when I put on my ring I can only pray that she knows I love her grandson more and more each day which just seems physically impossible from the day before. For the past 8 years Chip has been my world, and it just makes me cry those uncontrollable happy tears we spoke of the other day to think of how far we've come, how much we've grown and the things we have overcome together. I can't imagine, nor do I want to imagine, what my life would be like if 4 years ago tonight my world had not changed.

Love you, poo.

Friday, August 07, 2009

Roller Coaster

Being pregnant has been an adjustment. I like being pregnant, but one thing I or no one else is ever prepared for is the emotional roller coaster I live on. My goodness my hormones are crazy. For example:

Last night I was watching TV, the So You Think You Can Dance finale to be exact, and when the sweetest most talented girl won I noticed my nose getting all tingly and my eyes a little watery. I was so happy for her I shed a tear. What's up with that? Hello, it's a reality tv show and I felt like she was my daughter that I personally had professionally trained her to dance myself. I was proud.

Then I started thinking about times where I just can't control myself. Like yesterday and the kolache incident. I was leaving work walking across the parking lot thinking, I could cry. I could literally get in my car and drive to Texas and get a ham and cheese kolache and drive back. That is ridiculous.

Another thing that makes me cry, even if I only hear half of it- is the dang OnStar commercials on the radio! I can catch the tail end of an OnStar commercial and know that those OnStar people helped save someone that were in a crash or helped the little girls whose mommy isn't moving. Oh my goodness it is bad. I even teared up before I was pregnant so now it's like a sob. Sometimes I just turn the radio down so I don't have to go through the trauma and be so scared for these people but relieved that the OnStar support person was there to help.

Then the first time that I truly remember thinking, Rachel, get a freaking grip on yourself was when my husband told me he was in line at the grocery store, Sunflower, and an elderly lady was short money for her groceries and she only had staple items like milk, bread, etc and didn't use food stamps. My heroic husband helped out a lady in need and paid for the remainder of her groceries. Sigh...I'm tearing up now thinking about it. Anyway, he told me that he did that and I cried. I called my mom barely breathing I was crying so hard and said I know I'm stupid and can't stop crying but guess what Chip did? He is so sweet and I told her he helped an old lady out. I could not keep myself together and I know I sounded like a freak, we all know Chip is a great guy I just needed to cry about it.

Anyway. I just thought I would share a few of my moments. I know there will be ample more along the way and there are a few I've left out I know. Thank you to all that lend an ear when I have my moments.

I hope you all have a great weekend. I'll try to keep myself together till we talk again.

Thursday, August 06, 2009

Food Dilemma

Ok friends. This is serious. I have never had a craving like I am having a craving now. This is worse than the cheese puff with vinegar craving! I NEED, there is no "want," I NEED ham and cheese kolaches from Praseks, now. This is a dilemma because Praseks is located like 9 hours away and over 600 miles south west of my current location.

I tried Googling 'kolaches in Jackson, MS' and the closest is in Pascagola, MS. I'm not risking it, I need Praseks if I'm going to make that hike. You have to understand. I've traveled to the Czech Republic before, I've been to both Prague and Budapest and they don't compare to my friends kolaches. If I could take a vacation day tomorrow, I would leave now and drive to Texas eat about 3489762 of them and then have dinner with my family and drive back. It's that worth it.

For those of my non El Campo Texas friends who are asking, what is a kolache and how do you say it? Ko-lah-chi is a Czech pastry that is a bread filled with a cheese, fruit or meat. Don't you dare think of a run of the mill pig in the blanket thats all thin and wrapped in a crossant or something silly and a kolache in the same sentence. It doesn't do it justice. Let me see if I can explain the Praseks ham and cheese kolaches, they have been such a big part of my life I think I can describe it. Ok, close your eyes. Imagine a warm soft cloud with a twinge of sweetness then biting into it and your tastebuds dancing to the complimentary semi salty smoked ham and creamy lava hot cheese. Can you taste it? Isn't it divine? You aren't even pregnant and you want one don't you?

If you go to Praseks or order online, don't pass up the peppered turkey jerky, it's like nothing you've ever tasted either....while your at it grab me a homemade cream cheese strudel. Holy cow, there is no place like home, there is no place like home. My ruby red slippers aren't working.

Oh man, I'm getting in the car. I'll see you in 12 hours.

Adrienne Update

I know many of you have been asking about the status of my mother in law, Adrienne. Chip called me and said I could post this.

He just got off the phone with her husband Ed and he said the doctor came in and let them know that the tumor site has become more active. They are going to step up her chemo and keep her in the hospital for observation a couple of days.

As always, continue your prayers. I know that she would love to hear from you all but please keep in mind her rest. I'm sure she will be posting on her CaringBridge as soon as she's up to it and will definitely be able to give you more of a first hand explanation. When I know more I'll be sure to fill you all in.

I think I can speak on behalf of the family when I say, thanks for your continual support and prayers.

Wednesday, August 05, 2009

Who has the hook ups?

My awesome friend Lindsey hooked me up on a good deal.......AGAIN! I think she has some underground connections with the discount people at all local stores. Her and the Wal-Mart smiley face are BFF and he calls her when he's slashing prices. Her and the Dirt Cheap chicken communicate through Morse Code about special deals that may be of interest to her. Needless to say, she's the ultimate hook up and a wonderful friend that shares her inside secrets. And thank goodness for her iPhone so she can do on the spot email alerts of killer deals she comes across.

Lindsey saw 2 Jenny Lind (3 in 1) cribs on clearance at Wal-Mart for $50 each. So I got one for Charlie & Joyce's house and then JJ wanted one for her moms house. I would have LOVED to have one at my house but the trim in the baby room is more of a cream than a brilliant white. Plus, my cream colored bedding would not look good against the white either. Maybe something else will pop up somewhere. I thought about painting the crib, but my luck I'd use some paint that causes mesothelioma, black lung or some asbestos infected lead flaky ingestable stuff. I'll stick with the store bought prepainted crib.

Lindsey, I think your savings tab has gone up to over $300 by now. Maybe Chip will let me use that money you've helped me save to decorate the baby room with all of your goodies.

You all know what I like to do when I am happy and to return thanks?!?!
Write a Haiku....the only thing I am creative enough to whip together.
So Lindsey, here is your 5-7-5 of the day. I will always be indebted to you, my gorgeous friend.

Ode To Lindsey
Hooks me up on deals.
So my baby can be cute,
And save Chip money.
and if that wasn't enough for you...
Underground secrets.
You rock by telling me them.
You are my hero.
Much love to you girlfriend. I was glad to see your happy face yesterday while I was in action making the hot purchases...even if it was your 3rd trip to Wally Martinez that day.

Tuesday, August 04, 2009

Confirmed Friend

Darden Hays North confirmed you as a friend on Facebook...

We are BFF now. I saw that Lauren & Alysha are friends with him too, that is great!

Last night on my facebook I was checking out pictures of Dr. North's beautiful family and I showed them to Chip. He was so confused why I had photos of my gyno's family. I said "Oh we are friends on facebook." He thought this was soo funny....but I know him. He'll be looking him up today wanting him to be his BFF to - just you wait and see. Chip loves Dr. North just as much as I do.

I wonder if he will ever comment on my status? Uh oh, what if I have a status that says something like Rachel Childers Hawkins is eating a whole cheesecake in one sitting. Do you think he'll write that in my chart? I didn't think about how this could be a double edged sword. Ahh, it's ok...that's what BFF's do. We call each other out when we do something wrong. If your BFF can't tell you then who can?

Speaking of BFF's - I have many, Chip being one of them. I wonder at least 2 or 3 times a week if couples, married or not, laugh as much as we do. There is not a day that goes by where some inside joke or some random thought crosses our path and we don't crack up. I also often wonder when this happens in public if people think we are weird-o's? Not that it matters, but I'm curious to know outsiders perception of our antics.

Example: Last night we went to Sonic and I was asking him how much money it would take for him to eat certain items on the menu that included onions, lettuce or ketchup. As we waited for our order I'd point to a picture of onion rings and he'd say no less than $250. I'd point to the picture of the chicken wrap that has lettuce all in it and he'd say $8,498 (which is the price of a new 4-wheeler he's wanting), then I'd point to the breakfast burrito that has funky stuff in it and he'd say $1,000. It will take no less than $10,000 for him to take a ketchup packet put a dab on his finger and put it to his tongue. There were no promises made that he'd swallow it.

So as I was pointing at pictures on the menu and laughing so hard my abs hurt there were people looking at us from other cars. What were these people thinking about us? Maybe, who are these immature freaks? Maybe, those people are super fun? Maybe, those people are really really weird and are making me uncomfortable? Any of those answers are probably the truth. It's ok though, at least I have my own weird-o in this world that gets who I am....and we have procreated meaning there will be more of us. (insert evil laugh here - Mooo whooo haaa haa!)

Monday, August 03, 2009

Winner(s) of the Haiku

As promised; since Melanie was the first to correctly answer what that weird kidney shaped pan is and the plastic box/bucket too - - Here is a Haiku in her honor.

A friend of Jane Claire's,
Will be a friend of mine too.
Because you are smart.

Since I am feeling super creative I decided to write a Haiku about everyone that posted a comment.

The best friend ever
Even though her phones not broke
I will still love her.

My friend has nice boobs
She is a super hottie
I wish I was thin.

Leah was just wed
I have not met her husband
I bet he is nice.

A good friend to have
Always puts up with questions
That I have daily.

Sorry to those of you that didn't post missing out on my rare creative spurt. You know you don't have to have a blog to post comments! Click on comments, type your comment in the box then choose the Name / URL option and type in your name then publish comment. Voila! You will speak to me.

I insist all of you blog stalkers at least say hi so I know you were here and I know who to not talk about. Ha! Just kidding, I'll talk about you anyway!

Weekend in Review

Before I start I just received some great news. Jane Claire and Bubba found out today that they are going to have a little girl!

What a great weekend!
Friday night since Chip and I felt like we'd been eating out every meal I went and grabbed a few things from the grocery store and we had cook out night! Chip cooked chicken breasts, pork chops, hamburgers, mashed potatoes, sauteed potatoes in garlic, black eyed peas and I guess that was it? What we do is make mini meals in tupperware out of this and we just grab one for lunch or dinner and it still gives you a little variety with out all the fuss. Just set it and forget it.

Saturday was an eventful day for me. I woke up to volunteer at the Helping Hands Thrift Store. I'd never been in there and it was so much fun! You know how I get when things are at a discounted rate even if "gently worn". Chip made me promise I would not come home with a puppy, rooster or used underwear. I told him I was not going to a Flea Market but to the Thrift Store. Men, I swear. Later that mid day I left the thrift store to go and get my hair did. This is interesting to me. Since I am with child my hair is weird. My hair is growing at the speed of light due to the vitamins and then on top of that it's coming in dark brown - almost black. Yes, blackish brown would be a safe way to explain it. So, since we are about to come into Fall I went ahead and had it done a shade or two lighter than my new natural color. I will post pics soon.
I have to go back because the pesky grey hairs did not take, damn them....I told her to just pull them out...but there are a lot and I would be bald.

After getting beautified I got a call from my friend JJ. She was solo Saturday night and didn't know if maybe I wanted to go on a date...a prego date. She came and picked me up and we headed to Starkville. Since we are both due within mere seconds of each other we had lots of notes to compare and things to talk about. Also since she knows I'm addicted to Dirt Cheap she is such a sweet date showed me where the one in Starkville was. Oh man, this D.C. was awesome! I got a hugemongo never been opened industrial size Black & Decker food processor for $16, a 4 pack fancy thing of baby bottles that makes the baby feel like it's still breastfeeding for $8. I have no idea about bottles, but whatever it sounded like a good deal. Then the Mamma of all purchases; it was such a good find that JJ and I split the cost and we will automatically be crowned the most awesome parents / aunts in the history of parents / aunts. We bought a HUGE inflatable waterpark with a slide and things to climb on and pool. I think the original sticker on it was $499 and we got it for less than $100 bucks. The air blower inflater on it works and everything. I can't wait to have a fun day soon where her nieces and my niece and nephew can blow it up and try it out. It will be a couple of years before our kids can use it, but that's ok....we are still the coolest ever.

After Dirt Cheap we ate and then went to Walgreens to get candy for the movies. There was no denying our pregnancy - We looked like Willy Wonka with arm loads of candy. I got Junior Mints, Airheads and Hot Tamales. JJ got Sour Patch Kids, Hot Tamales and something else. We went and saw The Ugly Truth. Oh my goodness drop everything you are doing right this second and go see it. Obviously you aren't doing anything interesting so go! Get off your Duff! I honestly don't know if I have ever in my life laughed that loud in a movie theater. I laughed so hard and loud I heard my laugh echo in the theater. My stomach was so sore from having to catch my breath / laughing. At one point JJ was crying she was laughing so hard. It's not just a girly movie. It's got some funny guy stuff in there too. Gerard Butler has officially made my Top 5. Love Him!
We got home around Midnight. What a great date JJ is! We should do that every weekend.

Sunday we woke up late and went out to Chip's cousins house. Some of you know Glue....most of you didn't know we were related to him, sometimes we prefer to keep it that way. Anyway, we went out to his house where he has grown these watermelons I'd never heard of; they are called Moon and Star Watermelon. I will post pictures so you can see why. Their skin is green and has yellow speckles like stars then some have a big yellow spot which is the moon. It is really neat. When we went out there and his garden looked like a big ol weeded Hot Mess. This is my type of garden where you don't pick the weeds because it helps protect the melons from getting burned up in the sun. That's what happened to my garden last year....I was trying to protect it from the sun...uh yup, that's what happened. Around my house I am known as the Grim Reaper of Growing Things. So anyway, we got three big melons and took one to Chip's mom and cut up one to take to Charlie & Joyce's for dinner last night. Chip cooked up fish, hushpuppies, okra and green tomatoes. My niece and nephew were there being cutie patooties and I was just a big ol lump in the recliner.

Yesterday a new pregnancy symptom popped up. My feet & legs are wanting to start retaining water. Hello! KANKLES are NOT ok. I've been propping them up to prevent this and drinking nothing but H2O and cutting back on the salt intake but friends, I am scared. Is this another one of those things we talked about where it's too early for this to be happening? I think my niece Hannah predicted the kankles when she drew a picture of me and Chip. She drew a picture of me pregnant and my brother was quick to point out the kankles she drew on me. I will have to post it. It's true.

I hope you all have a great day. I am going to go prop my feet up and drink water while I work.

Saturday, August 01, 2009

Hospital Paraphernalia

Ok here is a real conversation between an expectant mother and an expectant father.

(*Note: not me and my hubby)

One night they were laying in bed and the husband asks -why do hospitals give you the plastic box, urinals, weird curved pan and a pitcher when you leave?

Wife said because you pay for them so they give them to you; then says the urinal thing is only good for boys anyway. Is that curved pan for girl pee? What do you do with the curved pan? Both perplexed, the husband says, What's up with the box?

The wife said it must be for sponge baths or to soak your feet. The husband suggest it's just to carry all that other crap home in.
The couple (not us) is still unsure of the use of any of these items. They easily figured out the pitcher and the boy urinal but the curved pan and box/bucket thing?

The wife thinking about the hospital and the delivery of their first born and then the horror stories she's heard quickly turns to her husband and says...with all seriousness. What happens if you have to wipe my hiney? Will you wipe my behind if I am unable to? The husband confused and appalled all at the same time with no hesitation says, Absolutely Not! The wife laughing but wondering why not asks, you wouldn't if I couldn't? The husband replied No, I am paying those people to do that! I am not going to do their job! Wipe your butt, ppsshhh. Pah-leez - Do I ask them to come and sell stocks and bonds for me?

The couple pauses from their uncontrollable laughter and the husband says, I have a feeling this is going to end up on your blog for some reason.

Since this couple is not us; even though ironically the husband from the story sells stocks and the couple is expecting their first child and the wife has a's not us. But still - someone PLEASE answer for my friends what in the world that curved pan and box are for? I tried to research it on google, but only found the pan is called a Kidney Pan from some wholesale hospital supply store. I wish I could reward the first person to answer this question with something but I'm not as creative and crafty as everyone that reads this blog. Maybe I can write a haiku about you. That is as creative as I get. And my friend from the story, her and her husband don't have any talents either or they'd offer a prize.

If I get the answer I will be sure to let that couple in the above mentioned story know what it is, since it wasn't us or anything. I'll relay the message to them for you. Thanks.