Thursday, March 27, 2008

Hanging with the interbots


When I woke up, that was the view from the balcony.

It was also sprinkling a little, which usually means "Thar's a storm a' brewin'!". So, I decided it was a good day to just take my laptop into town and do some research, hopefully for free. See, almost every hotel in Queenstown (and most other New Zealand cities) charges to use the internet (my hotel charges $20/3 hours) and the internet cafes charge anywhere from $4-$7's maddening. I was so spoiled at the Hotel SO with its free internet and mood lighting.

I immediately went to the local Starbucks, remembering that they seemed to have kids using the interbots all the time and, as I recalled, it was free. It turns out that, at least here, they charge $10/hour to use the internet. Greedy corporate bastards with great tasting Dulce de Leche frappacinos! I immediately left, frapp-free (well, no coffee anyway) and wandered around town looking for free internet access. I found one private coffee house that gave you an hour of free internet if you bought something/anything. So, I had a sandwich and their carmel frappacino (2 free hours!) and worked online there, then wandered around the wee city for a bit.


Can you believe that a hotel named "Amity" has vacancies? I didn't see blood dripping down the walls or Margot Kidder looking for her "teefs" in the bushes , but I did pick up my pace a bit.


This place wasn't far from Amity, but I opted not to try the "Satan Lovers" combo (comes with raw meat, meal worms and is slathered in "Eternal Hellfire" hot sauce). They should work with Amity and relocate to a dark Hellmouth near the outskirts of town, don't you think?


After passing those two places, I figured it wouldn't hurt me to spend a few minutes on hallowed ground, just to keep any lingering demons at bay. Speaking of bay...


I noticed a giant sailboat near the beach and watched as the kids on board were furiously spinning the steering wheel of their craft, causing it to lean dangerously close to one side. I was certain that I'd have to get ready to jump into the water and start pulling bodies out, but they righted themselves a bit later and continued on their way. It's just as well, it's not like I'd really just leave my backpack with computer on the beach, as well as having to empty my "purse pants" (something in every pocket) to dive into the cold water just to save a few rich kids who can't steer a boat. But, I would take graphic pictures and video of the accident and try to make some money from their tragedy....THAT'S the American way!


Besides, I'm sure that this gentleman and his trusty horned animal-friend would suddenly come to life, he'd say a few words like "Get thy wollen buttucks and curly horns into the water and save those children, Pinkerton!" and then a dramatic rescue would occur (which I'd also get on video and try to make money from). It happens in the movies all the I have to believe that it is possible.

I'm also trying to figure out whether to go to Fiji (of "Blue Lagoon" fame) or Rarotonga (part of the Cook Islands) before I head into LA. Each have their pluses and minuses, but it's only about $130 for me to change my flight and stop at one of them on the way back. So, I spent a couple hours in the Air New Zealand local office to discuss my flight options (and getting their first-hand reviews of each, which was helpful) and will likely decide what I'm gonna do in the next few days.

So, I left there and have now spent the last 3 hours or so at one of the cheaper internet cafes ($3/hour) doing more island research and, of course, this blog.

I'm hungry too.

Hmmm...maybe I'll just download some snacks, upload my blog, then unload my ass from this chair and get out of this virtual island of misfit geeks...

What a scathingly brilliant idea!

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