Post-toilet hand-washing

In my quest to encourage good, toilet-related hygiene, I have previously posted about splashback, the floor, the age-old up versus down seat debate, and seat contact prevention.

Today I will be discussing hand-washing. People wash their hands with varying degrees of thoroughness; from not washing all, to the old rinse ‘n’ dry, to a proper soap job. Always do the latter. Unwashed hands in a toilet spread dysentry, cholera, and food poisoning, among others. Remember: it doesn’t matter what you did in the toilet area, even if you just popped in to adjust your tie, if you touch anything WASH YOUR HANDS.

Hygiene does not finish with washing the hands though. You must also adhere to the post-wash protocol. Once you have washed your hands thoroughly, you may not touch anything in that room, except paper hand towels or toilet paper that was not exposed before you entered the room. Everything else in that room is Contaminated.

The two things you are most likely going to need to touch after you have washed your hands are also the most likely to be crawling with Contaminants. The first is the tap. This is the first thing that hand-washer’s touch after finishing their business, and is thus going to have all manner of Contaminants on it. The second is the door handle. For those foul disgusting pigs who do not wash, this is the first thing touched, and will also have all manner of Contaminants.

Once your hands are clean, use a barrier preventative to protect them from contacting the filth. Paper towels will do if nothing else is present. Wash; dry; turn off tap with paper towel; exit room, using paper towel to open door.

Bonus tip: If no barrier protection is available, grasp the door handle or tap in an unusual place, one that is unlikely to have been grasped by the Contaminated hands of the Unclean. These people are Unclean because they are lazy, so their handle-grabbing will always follow the path of least resistance.


Those whacky bisexuals!

I discovered this article (NSFW – there is a picture with half a nipple showing) by the Daily Mail about an incident in which part of artist/songwriter/musician Amanda Palmer’s breast was accidentally visible during a recent show.

The article is a pathetic piece of rubbish, and I’m not surprised the author hid behind the nom de honte “DAILY MAIL REPORTER”. For one thing, Ms Palmer has never been ashamed of her body and is more than happy to flaunt it to whomever is interested. I’m not sure she would be any more embarrassed by a brief nipple slip than I would be by an untied shoelace (for example, see her NSFW response to the article).

But I’m going to ignore on that, and focus on this little nugget printed towards the end of the text portion of the article. The pre-ante-penultimate sentence begins, “The bi-sexual singer also wore a pair of…”

So, why mention that she is bisexual? I looked at a bunch of other articles from the US Showbiz section of their website, and none of them mentioned the sexuality of the person being written about (note: although that last one about Jillian Michaels mentions her same-sex partner, they don’t go to the trouble of enlightening us as to whether she is lesbian or bisexual). Even this article, which refers to the fact that Darren Criss is playing an openly gay character (in which mention of Mr Criss’ sexuality may at least be justified in the context of the acting challenge involved in a straight person playing a gay person), doesn’t say word one about his sexuality.

So why this bolt from the blue, bearing such a burning bulletin of ballsy bisexuality?


Look at those crazy bisexuals and the whacky things they do!

Their customs are different from us!

We should mock them and revel with glee at their embarrassment when their silliness backfires!

They didn’t mention where she gew up. They didn’t mention where she went to college. They didn’t mention what her parents were like. They didn’t even mention the fact that she is married. Amanda’s sexuality does not define her. Like all of these things, and more, it is just one part of who she is. Yet when pointing out all of her crazy antics and hi-jinks, the authore chose to remind everyone of that particular fact. Way to encourage bigotry and reinforce negative stereotypes, Daily Mail!