Monday, 16 May 2016

Let the Terrorist Through!!

Let the Terrorist Through

So received a letter saying to meet for the citizenship exam in the next week. Once successful I will get a date to swear an Oath to the Canadian Flag. Yes its better than getting a Green Card to the US its a dream for most people.

I guess I should be more happy especially since I got 100% for the exam but I cant betray my feelings. Lets get the obvious out of the way. A Canadian passport is like kryptonite to me, its like Van Der Merwe in a whore house with a credit card, its just doesn't get any better than that. For a guy from Athlone who has been traveling the world and knows what it means to use a Third World passport to get around, I should feel completely elated. Imagine you needed a passport with a current visa every time you entered Shoprite, this is what's its like. Having security personnel organize themselves every time you present your South African passport - in less than subtle ways I might add. Having my bags constantly ruffled through for bombs, guns, biltong and animal skins - which is understandable.
I look back to one specific incident when boarding a plane in Canada. It was the smallest airport I have ever been in. There was probably only 5 people in the entire airport including my wife and I. As I gently walked up to the security point I very slowly removed my passport from my shirt pocket. As I pulled it out ever so carefully as to not frighten the heavily armed security it was about half way out when they started to whistle and motion each other to surround me. The security in front of me started to give me her smart ass "I am just doing my job and you better listen or I send you to Guantanamo" speech. Ordered me to remove everything including my prosthetic leg and toupee.  I get taken one side and done over thoroughly. The Ghamajtie in me just snapped but in a well controlled way that my wife would just about approve.

I raised my voice and calmly spoke to the security and asked why on earth did she call a death com five on me when I did not even show her my passport. I told her how frustrating this all is. She understood my pain and nicely told me on my air ticket there is an allocation of SSS which mean triple security threat. Possibly because I paid cash or there is no return ticket. As my wife was stabbing me in my heart with her eyes for causing a scene in dear Canada I digressed and moved on.

Violated or Justified

I will get tons of slack for suggesting that their profiling is justified. For years working on ships we travelled in and out of the US and were always "randomly chosen" to sit in a bullet proof glass room with homeland security offices for anywhere between 3-8 hours. Looking around at all the brown people in the room you immediately see each others pain and solidarity with every eye contact and roll of the eyes. We are in the lions den and we have no choice. So shut up, comply, act subservient to the Homeland security Gods and beg like a leper for them to let you in. Ordinarily us guys would be bold and brave by saying you do not take discrimination, you will not be spoken down to, you will not be interrogated because you are in charge of your being and freedom. But in this case you are so desperate to get through that exit doors and to the promised land you would forgo your usual bravado and ego. Yes I said it. You would lick the doughnut crumbs off his face to let your through those golden gates.

Here's the despicable part: I do not blame them for profiling. If some crazy jihadist was trying to bring an explosive on the plane that I am on I would tell them to triple check all the brown people first!!

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