Your Morning Dooley

(Note To Readers: Last night's Evening Jemmy was cancelled due to the fact that he pretty much wasted his time setting up that whole Constitution business. It will return tonight, purely for reasons of nostalgia. The Management)

"They were all alike. I think iv Bobby Burns as a man that wrote
good songs, aven if they were in a bar'brous accint, but Hogan
thinks iv him as havin' a load all th' time an' bein' th' scandal
iv his parish. I remimber Andhrew Jackson as th' man that licked
th' British at Noo Orleans be throwin' cotton bales at thim, but
Hogan remimbers him as a man that cudden't spell an' had a wife who
smoked a corncob pipe. I remimber Abraham Lincoln f'r freein' th'
slaves, but Hogan remimbers how he used to cut loose yarns that
made th' bartinder shake th' stove harder thin it needed. I
remimber Grant f'r what he done ar-round Shiloh whin he was young,
but Hogan remimbers him f'r what he done arr-ound New York whin he
was old."

-- Finley Peter Dunne, 1899.

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