Wednesday, January 14, 2015

When Your Part Is Small But Your God Is BIG *and FUN NEWS*

Friends, I have a story to tell. It's a story of a God-Sized dream, and a broken heart, and a spark that all came together on one day - changing my life forever.

If you remember, God took what I thought was the definition of my God-Sized dream and ran it down a vein that I didn't understand at all. That was the place where He asked me to commit to a group of 3rd-5th grade students on Wednesday nights at my church. I always laugh and say "I STILL don't know how or why I'm here".  I've concluded, that sometimes we can be asked to do things that make no sense to us but have more to do with our answer than the thing we're being asked to do. Does that make sense?

So, here's me showing up every Wednesday night after the start of the school year and then life begins to hit and hit hard. My uncle passed away of cancer and then less than two weeks later, I lost my Grandpa {his dad} too. It was so heavy of a time in my year last year. I was just sad for a while but wanting to not fall away from my commitments either.

Before this happened, I was invited to head to a studio with a group from my church to record what they call "gain vocals" for an album that will be released very soon.  I was excited and blown away that out of so many people, I would be asked. After my uncle passed away, I felt God begin to challenge my heart in a way that I'm still not super comfortable to share because I fear people may take it wrong. Basically, He was letting me know {in a way} that my Grandpa would pass soon and He wanted me to carry on. I had no idea why I kept thinking the same thing over and didn't make sense to me...until the day my Grandpa went on to glory.

That day he passed away? That was the same day I was to go to the studio and record the gain vocals with the group. Immediately, that one phrase I kept hearing began to make sense to me and I knew I HAD to go to the studio even if I had a really good reason to withdraw instead. I quietly showed up and then sang my heart out, not really letting anyone know about my Grandpa's passing on until after we were finished. For me, it was a way to meet up with him. I knew he was singing far greater than any of us in the studio and my heart wanted to worship God with him.  I made it threw that night with a heart full of joy unexplainable.

That night, something else sparked in me. See, I had been hiding a catalog of melody and lyric ideas that I thought weren't good enough for well over a year. A YEAR, PEOPLE. I can't believe I would hide inspiration due to insecurity but that night I decided I was SO done with that. I began to pull out voice memos from my phone and sit in prayer with them. I'm now working on my 4th song.

Please don't ask what I plan to do with the songs I write. I will only laugh and say "I have no idea why I'm doing this. I just feel like I have to & I really am enjoying it."

See...our lives are just melody lines. Some are obscure or sound strange on their own but if you play them in time with the melodies of others, you wouldn't be able to take in all the beauty you would hear. God-sized things are always beyond what we can reach or handle on our own. His symphony is one that causes angels to repeat themselves over and over again "Holy, holy, holy...".

Now. Fun news! Woodside Worship is releasing their CD on Jan. 23rd at the Troy campus {7pm}. They're having a big party, y'all. :)  If you can't make it to the release, you'll be able to find the album on iTunes as well.  AND...I have a music video of the first single to share!! Woo Hoo! Please share this with anyone and everyone.

Maybe I'll see you at the party? 

Also, please pray for me. I'm waiting on God to give me the next steps and there are a lot of things that may or may not be in the future for my family. He will lead us and the pieces will all fall into place, it's just a very foggy view for now. ;)



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