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In between hell and heaven, there were many pleasant stops for Serina...

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 Number 4                      April 25, 1999                      Volume 1
        Feature Story........CRY2-4    Funny Bones...........CRY10-12
        Poems and Stories....CRY5-6    Quest Central.........CRY13-14
        A Cry for Help.......CRY7      Announcements.........CRY15
 [editor] Mystaric [printer] Bede
 [staff] Allison Alovea Anaisse Apollonia Athuro Cyniq Dacoit Decantor
         Deevlit Gurt Hawpch Iktome Kayah Keroppi Kuah Lohon Louellin
         Mea Ranstlin Thabo Tunclon Vestia Yardan
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Interview with an Immortal
Serina has become one of the more popular Imm's due in part
to her unique and addictive quests.  She's combined a love
of word puzzles and an understanding of the realms and
created quests that both frustrate and invigorate glory-
seeking realmers from every walks of life.
     Looking back on Serina's history in the realms is
as enjoyable and entertaining as one of her quests.  One
little known fact about this lovable Imm is the fact that
Serina was not her first character.  As a newbie, faced
with the frustrating rigors of leveling for the first time
in this huge world, she lost her marbles, and got a bit
too frisky with the immortals.
     "When I first started playing here I was so lost, so confused, and
very annoyed," says Serina.  "Eventually I just got sooooo ticked off
and *cough*  .. started mouthing off.  So I'd have to say
my very first experience was my most embarassing one.
Level one and in hell.  They wouldn't let me out ever . a couple of weeks later I tried again."
   Giggling, Serina, the consumate pixie, admitted that
her story might inspire mortals who have found themselves on
the wrong side of right.  If she could rise from hell to
the graces of Immortality, they should feel inspired.
    In between hell and heaven, there were many pleasant stops
for Serina.  She started over and found herself amongst the
family of guilded clerics.  Which she joined under the
leadership of Jeremiah.  Looking back, Serina remembers those
times fondly, as many of us remembers our younger years.
    "I found a whole group of people I could depend on.
They became like family and made me feel really comfortable
and showed me a whole new part of the realms," says Serina.
Serina eventually became leader of her wonderful family.
    "Eventually I thought I'd give leadership a shot,
and ran for first in the GoC. I got that, and made my
way up to leader.  Ran the guild of clerics for a fabulous year."
    Before she became an Imm, Serina was also involved with
the Newbie Council and the Pixie Nation Council.  During
her time in the realms, she has seen it change from a small
world, much more laid back than it is now, but she enjoys
the changes.
   "...things were sooooo different, and much quieter!;)," she says
"Although I'm not complaining, I'm happy with the way things
have progressed."
   And progressed they have, partly do to the input of dedicated
Immortals like herself.

Interview with a Leader
     The latest Guildmaster for the Guild of Druids deals with leadership
with a smile on her face and a quill in her hand.  Ceirana Starprofit, Leader
of the Guild of Druids, has adjusted smoothly to a transition into
leadership that can often times be bumpy and frustrating.  She writes more
notes than ever and is giving advice like nobody's business, but she says
she loves her new role in the guild.
     "Our guild has had great leadership from the start, and it has been
fun and an honour to be part of that tradition," says Ceirana.
     A very positive individual, she does notice the increaste of duties,
but accepts it with a cheery disposition, and the endurance of a well
trained druid.  Which might explain why she has experienced an
overwhelming amount of support and popularity in and out of the guild.
     "It can be very time consuming some days, being a guildleader, as
some days it just seems that everyone is sending tells and needing
something," says Ceirana while at the same time acknowledging  how much the
guild and her new role has added to her guild experience.
     When Ceirana first joined the guild, it was a lot smaller than it is
now, Phred was Guildmaster and she fell in love and never looked back.
Today, the guild had undergone major renovation, she is Guildmaster, but
she still isn't looking back.
     Ceirana was a battleground newbie, staying until lev6, because she
hadn't how to write a note, which was deficit that kept her from joining
the guild of druid until level 27.  She was spared the task
     "I meant to join sooner, but it would have meant writing an actual
note," says Ceirana giggling.  "Something I had not done before."
   Fortunately for her a druid name Phil held her hand through the
induction process and the Guild of Druids were blessed with a
great leader today.
    Ceirana is more than eager to brag about the great programs
her guild has, but when all is said and done, she sums it up perfectly.
    "DRuids ROck!! the guild is a wonderful place to be!  and I am proud
and tickled to be a part of such a great organization."
(Reporters note:  This will be my last article on behalf of the
guild, subsequent to this interview I left the GoD.  Its still
the best guild in the realm though.)
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Poems and Stories
                   --   Fools Run   --
                Cowered in the darkness
                From the pain of love's embrace
                The  sting of rapture burning deep
                A scar we can't erase.
                Yet like a vicious circle
                we keep a watchful eye
                seeking out our heart's desire
                in spite of tears we cry
                Longing for a lover's touch,
                companion to our souls
                someone to confide in --
                a friend to make us whole
                But isn't it ironic
                that such passion makes us weak
                and like fools we run away
                from the very love we seek.
                  -- Amoria Whitewind --

A Cry for Help
The Cry of Despair is introducing a brand new weekly column..."A
Cry For Help".  As the name implies, it will be an advice column.
Readers can write in questions about anything from personal
problems to Eq nightmares.  If you have something you would like
to seek advice on, or need a solution to a nagging problem,
send a mudmail to anyone on the staff of the paper and put
'A Cry For Help' in the subject.  Names will not be published.
   If you wish to respond to a question in the column, send a mudmail
to anyone on the staff and put "Response to Cry" in the subject.
Dear A Cry for Help,
    I've been happily married to this wonderful Av Pixie.  We
met while we were both newbies, and have been together ever
since.  We've had great times together and have settled into
a nice relationship for about a year and half now.
     The problem is that I started a newbie one day while she
was away...visiting her family in the forest.  I wanted to
see how fast I could assist it in leveling.  Well...while I was
still in the academy, I met this other newbie. She was level too
and I was completely caught up in her innocence and spent the
whole day trying to help her out.  Well..I didn't tell her I had
an Av character, nor did I tell her I was married.  Its been about
two weeks now, and I always spend time with her when she's on.
I haven't told my wife about the newbie, and I'm starting to
feel horrible.  Should I stop seeing this girl, or is it
really considered cheating if its not with the 'married alt'?
An old dog with a new bone!!
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GoP news
In an inter-guild competition with the Guild of Vampires, the Guild of
Paladins claimed victory!!!  Results were close, with both sides showing
a trememdous effort, but at the end of the 2 hour event one Paladin remained
standing!  :) Good Job GoP!!!
The Guild of Paladins proudly introduces new members Delnoch and Orturas.

Order of Templars
By: Cyniq Dela Drones
The Order of Templars is currently an unofficial order, inspired by
the real life Order of Templars, the order is a military order, based on
self control and discipline. Cyril of GoA currently leads the order until
the order becomes and official order., the current deity is Casdin.
Each member will be accountable to a  commanding officer and will be
expected to carry out the instructions given to them. The purpose of the
military portion is so that members can be an effective fighting force.
The order is based on the idea of communal property. The more a
member contributes the higher the rank the person may achieve.
The Order of Templars goal is to be an effective run order. They will
strive To run all avatar mobs effectively and effeciently. The order is
mainly Designed To help those newbietars who have a hard time finding
people to run with. All equipment gained from runs done by the order
goes into the order storage.The equipment is then divided among the order
members depending on Activity with in the order and on runs. If a person
chooses to leave the order Honorably their account is then credited. The
order will also deal with the Trading aspect of  realms. So for those who
enjoy trading this order is for you.
To gain acceptance to the order , you must first pass a interview given by
A member of the order. You then must lead members of the order on a run
To an avatar mob. This shows leadership capabilities and knowledge of the
realms.After that you are voted on by the members of the order, if you get
the majority of votes you will be accepted into there ranks.
All in all this is a new theme for an order and is already supported by an
Immortal I for one would like to see this order coded as it will help those
gain more run experience I wish the order the best of luck.
Cyniq Dela Drones  Order of Baali  1st Elven Nation

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      '--' '-'    _                                    _     '-' '--'
Funny Bones
Narana Screams "Eat a lot and Ride Roller Coaster!".
Vergrom the Ugly glares at you and Uglies you to death...
Akael rampages all over you in a very merry manner.
A Funny
someone chats: "Cheer! ... I just adepted away'
Funny Titles
Cresis the Iron Lady has rusted. [The Symposium]
Tamarkus is the Annoyed Paladin of the year {IC GoP}. (Guild of Paladins)
Krystiana kicks the snot outta time and curses bad modems. (Order of Dragonslay
Lethryn on a Holy Quest for Kool-Aid (Order of Dragonslayer)
Jebalakiz mercy. i am new to pk and mostly naked.
Zilch is less than one
Mikieln likesthesandwichesinthoseflimsyplastictriangles.
Cassoc is OOC for quest. RPers also need mudlives. (Guild of Vampires)
Brexhan Five out of Four ppl have trouble with fractions.
Duvessa ate a furby in one bite!CoLSENIOQC. (Order of Arcanes)
Verimthraxus: You Thought You Were Someone, But You Goofed. (Order of Dragonsla
Hilldebrand spanks his monkey well and it obeys.
Geldron is getting married, as soon as she gets drunk.(Guild of Clerics)
Sarah is snubbing someone...maybe it's you!. (Order of Dragonslayer)
Interesting stuff on Avchat
Herne: Nobody luvs me... *sigh*
Iseult: Bah, that's not true, H.
Iseult: Your mom loves you. Although she dresses you funny.
Herne: *blink*
Jaspera: *twitch* Funny..dresses...
Kayah: pink.. frilly.. cute.. dresses *twitch*
Iseult: Actually, Herne looks good in a tutu.
Ilsensine: Red Lace Panties!!! *oops* :P
Herne: You promised you'd never tell, Issy!
Iseult: It's the wand and fairy dust that get me.
Darrek: Herne in panties. Great, now I need therapy.
Herne: You needed therapy before, Darrek.
Funny Submissions
I origionally had the intent of making my character's (Elbanor)
health points down to at least -11hp with the purpose to have my cleric
heal him and kill him, forming an interesting skit to submit to the CoD.
Things, as you can see, did not exactly turn out that way...
(-6hp 125m 210mv)
Zoicyte utters the words, 'heal'.
(-11hp 125m 210mv) north
A little difficult to do when you are DEAD...
(-11hp 125m 210mv) laugh
Lie still; you are DEAD.
Darkhaven Square
Exits: north east south west up northeast northwest.
Elbanor the Attendant is DEAD!!
Zoicyte blah is standing here.
I would like to thank Artegal for donating 25 glory for adding -5hp
to a charm bracelet to make this scenario happen =)
Editor's Note: The editor wanted to title this "Things to do in
Darkhaven when you're dead" but he restrained himself.

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Social Quest
Are all of you itchin for a quest in these lowly times of boredom?
Great! I thought not, but you'll be getting one anyway. So what is a
Social Quest you say? Well here's the rules and regulations.
1). Your social idea may be as strange or ordinary as you like,
2). Try to keep the fowl language down, we do haveta read these,
    and obviously if your social just swears it won't be accepted,
3). You can mudmail/turn in your social to any of the Cry of Despair
4). Socials must be written up on a note and contain all of the following,
 -The message you see displayed when you do the social to you,
  to nobody, and to somebody.
 -The message others see when you do it to you, nobody, or somebody.
 -And the message the victim sees when you do it to them.
5). All submission must be submitted by next Saturday(5/1/99) at 12 noon,
6). Be creative!
  -Allison Starsmore of the Guild of Clerics
Social Quest Example
(Your Name)
You boogie with Sally!
Allison boogies with Sally!
Allison boogies with you!
You boogie.
Allison boogies!
You boogie with yourself.
Allison boogies with herself, lost in her own little world.
************Limerick Quest************
Posted on the chest of a barmaid from Hell
Was tatooed all the prices of ale
Pasted on her behind
for the sake of the blind
Was precisely the same, but in braille.
That is called a limmerick, an 18th Century form of poetry
The earliest English limmerick published was 'Hickory Dickory
Dock'.  A limmerick is simply a five line poem of a certain
rhyming pattern and rhythm.  The 1st, 2nd and 5th lines rhyme with
each other, as does the 3rd and the 4th.
    The Cry of Despair is looking for the best limerick in the
realms.  If you can come up with a hilariously, witty limerick send it to any
member of the Cry's staff via mud-mail. All submissions must be
free of vulgarity and explicit content and must be received
no later than May 7th at 12 noon.
   /       \ .--"--.     -+ Wedding Announcements +-
  ||.------.|       ||     Best Wishes Good Luck
  |;        .------.|
  /_..---.._.\                 Amoria and Onyx
 .'    (_)   '|---.._.\
 ._       _.'  (_)   '|
    `"'''-       _.' --------------------------------
   Together they Vowed To Walk The Realms As Man and Wife
     The Staff of the Cry of Despair Wishes them all the
          Blessings That true love can bring.
Thanks for reading The Cry of Despair!