Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Yeah, I'm having THAT day

So you know how you lay there in bed and you think about the day ahead of you and it becomes increasingly more difficult to get your ass in gear because as you lay there you realize that you are probably the LEAST creative person you will encounter in the entire day?

You realize that some run-on sentence that probably makes very little sense just might be the very best thing you do today and it's only 8:45. Wait, 8:46?

Then you realize that you really need to start working on doodles of conversion vans because if you are ever going to be able to pull-off a 1/2 arm zombie road surfing on top of a van in aviator sunglasses to the smooth sounds of Kenny Loggins while wearing a Teen Wolf t-shirt you are really going to need the practice. And by practice you really mean 4 years of art school. But because 2009 is the Year of Teen Wolf and you've already committed so strongly to 1/2 arm zombies you better get to work on making the two jive. And I mean a rockin' Teen Wolf Zombie/Kenny Loggins jive to make the world know you mean bidness.

Yeah, I'm totally having one of those days. I'm sure they have a book I can read to get through this though.

The only thing getting me through this situation is that I'm pretty sure with just minor effort I can top this:

Because if I can't top the beaver on a stick that my almost 2 year old brought home yesterday, I should just end it now, people.

And now I have to go write sentences that make sense and don't embarrass everyone who has ever known me. Although they wouldn't admit it now.


rachie! said...

Is that a stick, or a straw? It looks like a straw and something disturbs me about 2 year old being given a beaver with a straw up its' rear. I guess a stick isn't any better, though there's no sucking implied with a stick.

Betsey Booms said...

rachie - You so busted me. It is a straw. I just thought a beaver on a stick was funnier...

You've shown me the error of my ways though.

Yeah,beaver on a straw is unsightly.

Rassles said...

This is going to be the greatest year of our lives.

AND: Beaver on a stick? No fucking way. No. Way.

More crazy Teen Wolf references.

Betsey Booms said...

Rassles - Songs will be written about this year. That? I promise you.

I know, crazy ass beaver on a stick. I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw it!

It's like we were destined to combine forces and spread the gospel of the wolf.

Rassles said...

I climbed to the top of Mount Stiles to to have my weekly chat with God, because He lives there, and he told me that LL Cool Jesus was working on a wolf-themed rap inspired by the musical stylings of the newest hot rapper, Joaquin Phoenix, who now looks like Teen Wolf. True story.

Betsey Booms said...

Rassles- If I didn't consider myself blessed by association, I'd be totally pissed at you for having such an awesome life.

PS - I'm almost certain that Joaquin is Gaelic for "singer of the wolf". This explains his retirement. I predict this rap will be carved into stone tablets.

Googling stone tablet vendors now.

Rassles said...

Excellent. Regardless of whether or not they'll carve them for you, remember this: I have a shiv. So either I could shiv them into submission, or shiv-carve the tablets myself. Little FYI.

Betsey Booms said...

You are such a team Teen Wolf player.

Technically, I think you will be shanking the tablets. Prison yard lingo is an ever evolving language much unlike the Queen's English but I'm pretty sure on that one.

Those tablets have it coming.

Rassles said...

Fuck you, tablets. I shake my beaver straw at you.

Betsey Booms said...

Man, I've been shaking my beaver straw all day long and let me tell you...

Be careful, the power of the beaver straw ain't nuthin' to fuck with.

Wu Tang Clan and Beaver Straw.

Word of warning.

Miss Yvonne said...

I think you're missing out on a major windfall with the Beaver Straw. Just make some minor alterations and boom you've broken into the adult toy and/or personal grooming market(s).

Then you could expand and add the Teen Wolf Straw to your line of products.

Betsey Booms said...

This? Is why I love you guys. You just padded my retirement account.

Erin said...

Oh, man. That is not a good concept at all. I think it's time for the world to learn that some orifices should not be approached with straws.