Diffusing Stressful Experiences

Stress Free Holidays

The Effects of Stress

Stress taxes the heart, kills brain cells, twists the perception, hurts the soul, and is the source of many bad choices. And importantly, all this is unnecessary when you learn to take control of your mind instead of it controlling you and your emotions.

If the cause of your stress is preparation for a new life style, a big event, a major transition, or dealing with personal loss, as you are preparing for it, you can make the preparation period a blessed memory not a traumatic one. You can learn tools to recognize your stress level and how to handle it appropriately rather than letting it make you a nervous wreck.

There are simple methods for removing the feelings of overwhelm, fear, negative anticipation that can make your work move along smoothly. Staying in alignment with your goals and intentions will manifest your objective without anywhere near the effort your stressed out confused state of mind will.  Operating from your Authentic Self versus the self that is vested in outcomes and external validation makes the requisite adjustments and the job at hand flow naturally so that added attention to handle spontaneous triggers isn’t required.

The Mixed Bag of Family Holidays

The holidays are one situation that we can apply these principles to with great reward….a joyful experience for all. As we all know the holidays bring up ambivalent feelings for many of us.  We look forward to it as it fills our hearts with anticipation of seeing our loved ones, yet if you let it, it can also fill your mind with anticipation of difficult family interactions. Why do we do that to ourselves?  Old programs and unpleasant memories trigger us to get into the stress of the family reunion.

Of course the very act of anticipating criticism, disapproval, in-fighting, gossiping, and hurt feelings for yourself or those we love brings it into being as a concrete reality.  We know that events manifest according to frequencies sent out from the mind and the more powerful the frequency, i.e., the more entrenched it is in the subconscious mind, the bigger the chance it will show up in our life. Brain research has told us it is memories and expectations that create the circumstances of our lives and they are held in the realm of the unconscious. The more potent the emotion, the more traumatic the memory, the stronger the brain tracings and the oftener the patterns triggers to repeat.

This is on a subliminal level as well as the conscious level. If you are talking to your family about how bad, scary, or uncomfortable it will be this year when you get together, you are really setting it up to experience. Words solidify our thoughts into three dimensional reality. That’s part of why affirmations work. Another reason they work is because the subconscious mind cannot distinguish between what is real and what is imaginary, what is an event you experienced and what is an event that happened to someone else that your mind internalized off TV or a movie. By talking about something, or proclaiming and affirming it you are programming your unconscious mind to manifest it. It can be an unwanted event, such as family fights, or it can be a positive event such as a great holiday visit with love flowing freeing from the family circle. It is up to you and your family members to create it the way you prefer.

How can we handle our dread of spending time with the family. Removing old traumatic experiences at the hands of your family, and rescripting a new program for your subconscious mind to follow as a goal is a great start. There is more about all these processes and protocols on thelifemanagementcenter.com.

An important part is this particular process so relevant to family get togethers, is the element of forgiving and releasing both the event, the perceived other’s responsibility for your injury, and yourself. When followed by a reframe of the incident and the person this leaves in its stead, a flattened wave of emotion, that is no-emotion to stimulate bad feelings, anger or resentment. You will find such relief and such an altered viewpoint about the incident and the person that you will wonder why you carried that dread, anger and negative energy around poisoning your own body mind system for so many years. Forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves not others. It breaks the ties of negative vibrations between two people and allows the ties of appreciation, love, and respect to re-connect them in a holistic way. It brings us to a state of understanding and compassion for others’ motivations, and restores us to the state of grace and benevolence we were created to exist and relate in.

If you set an intention for what you want the holiday with your family to look like and to feel like, the outcome will surprise you. Remember the rule for creating what you want in life instead of letting random events outpicture old programs. You may recall some of the lessons in this blog and from my classes. Here is one of the ways to set an intention, to create something that everyone can use. You must be in the quiet, and then let yourself imagine your desire using all the senses you can. When you are really in the scene, state your intention, your desire. “We have a wonderful holiday this year.” In the stillness, in the absence of mind chatter, your mind will accept this creative visualization as real and being to bring it into being. You must not allow blocking thoughts or beliefs to overwhelm your state of being in the silence or they will prevent your intention from creating. You don’t want your message to the universe and to your own mind to have mixed frequencies or you will get a random occurrence instead of your deliberate intentional creation. Unless you have been using manifesting tools for a while, you cannot set an intention, claim an outcome, create something new or different, while you are distracted by anything else. You can’t be listening to the radio, watching TV, on the phone, running your laundry list of things to do, running should of’s on yourself, or what if’ing. You have to be focused, intentional, in the zone, and willing to direct all your attention on your intention. It isn’t hard to do and it gets easier as the mind is trained to do it by repetition. And the benefits of creating a stress free holiday are not only physical but heart felt memories that will bless your life.

Now you are ready to go here to read Dr. Oz’s enlightening article about staying well during the holidays. http://livingintentionally.org/?p=403

from Transform Your Life Instantly: Mental Erasers Make the Law of Attraction Work  for You Instead of Against You © 2005,  Adele Tartaglia