Ask Roulette

Welcome to the first installment of Ask Roulette. A different kind of advice column. This will be a recurring Saturday event. All questions can be  submitted via the Facebook page or you can fill out the handy contact form at the end of this blog.

This is for entertainment purposes only. All advice given should be recognized as unprofessional advice from a professional smart-ass.



Dear Roulette,

What do you think of saying no” to sex to your sex partner?

Sexy Time or Not 

Dear Sexy Time, 

I think saying no to your sex partner should be the exception, not the rule unless, of course, you’re OK with him/her fucking someone else. If that’s the case, then withhold away.  However, if you have valid reason to not want to have sex with him/her like your mom just died or your vagina looks like a SVU episode, then it’s OK to take some time for yourself, but if you are just withholding as A.) Punishment for him/her not taking you to dinner last Friday or B.) You just don’t feel like it, then I think maybe you need to re-evaluate. Of course some partners will be faithful no matter how often you give or don’t give them sex, but ask yourself why you don’t want to have sex with your sex partner. 


Dear Roulette, 

Why don’t people do the things they should be doing? (Open to any interpretation) 

Procrastination at it’s Finest

Dear Procrastination, 

People don’t do the things they should be doing for two reasons. They are either lazy or they are simply assholes. People have a tendency to put off today what they can do tomorrow. It’s the procrastinator’s creed. I had a boyfriend who promised me the world and had every intention of giving it to me, but his follow through was about as in tact as a broken windshield. And since a girl can’t live on good intentions, the relationship soured. But I did learn who I could take at face value when they said they were going to do something and who I wouldn’t hold my breath over. However, if this is a sex question (which I hope it is), then maybe they just don’t know what they should be doing and maybe you need to have an adult conversation about physical needs. 


Dear Roulette, 

If you are friends with someone that you enjoy being around but they are needy when it comes around hanging in a group, is it best to end the friendship?  Ex: The friend that gets jealous if you’re talking to another friend. The friend that gives side eyes. 

Looking for the Eject Button and Permission to Push

Dear Ejector, 

If you truly enjoy being around your friend, I would not suggest ending the friendship.  Instead, try meeting him/her where they are and make an effort to plan a day every few weeks or so where it is just the two of you. You never know why your friend may be so needy. It could be social anxiety. Or maybe your friend has a crush on you….stranger things have happened. The important question is how important is this person to you and does this person add value to your life? If neither applies, go ahead and hit that eject button! 


Dear Roulette,

How do you handle a friend that tries to low sabotage your other friendships because they can’t handle you being the nucleus of the friendship circle?

Not Friendly Behavior


Dear Not Friendly, 

I agree. That kind of behavior is not friendly at all. I would question why you are keeping this person around in any capacity. If you are the “nucleus of the friendship circle,” I would guess you have a somewhat magnetic, maybe even dominant type of personality. A go-getter. A take charge kind of person. I definitely would not water down who you are to make someone feel comfortable or important. I will repeat these words over and over when it comes to relationships until everyone gets it….. if your so called friend does not add more value than he/she is taking, it is perfectly fine to leave that person behind. Not everyone was meant to be around for a lifetime. Some people are seasonal. 




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