The Returnening

« December 2016 »

Memo to Return Of Kings: YOU'RE STILL SHITHEADS.

I've been largely avoiding areas of high gloat potential since the election, for obvious reasons. I mean, Trump won. They get to gloat a bit. They think they get to gloat a lot, of course. They think they get to gloat in a manner wildly inconsistent with narrow victories in three key states and a nearly unprecedented popular vote loss. Nonetheless, they get to gloat, and I don't need to see them gloating to know they're gloating.

This has, of course, had an effect on the new tradition that is Men's Rights Monday. But I thought I'd check in, and in case you're wondering if the win and suddenly finding themselves in power has caused any newfound thought or reflection or even self-awareness on their part, HA HA HA HA HA no, they're still giant dicks with tiny cocks.

So let's take a quick peek at some of the articles they have going on right now, just quickfire-style, just to catch up with the current state of the leading garbage barge of Men's Rights.

For example, there's "How To Reduce Your Risk Of Divorce", which seems wildly out of character for the "we're not misogynist just because we think women are convenient semen depositories that better not talk too much" Men's Rights Movement. But they don't all feel that way, or, as "Brutus Centinel" so charmingly puts it, "Call me a faggot, but I want to share my life with a woman."

In addition to his deeply confused idea of what it means to "call him a faggot", Centinel's recommendations are "don't marry a slut", "don't marry a slut", "marry a white woman", "marry someone who believes in a patriarchal religion", "I don't understand it, but the statistics say marry someone with a college degree", "don't marry someone whose parents are divorced", "don't marry a rape victim", "don't marry someone you've knocked up", "don't marry someone with mental illness", and "don't marry outside your race". Nothing, of course, about how you treat your wife, of course. Stay classy, dudes.

In case you're wondering what Head Garbageman Roosh V. is up to, you can, should you so choose, read the complete list of all 131 answers he gave to the 2016 Q&A. What's the 2016 Q&A? What are some of those answers? It's cute that you think I love you all that much, but no, that's not gonna happen.

I'd much rather read "5 Quick Fixes For Your General Social Anxiety", because it's not general social anxiety at all, it's specific "approaching women" social anxiety they're talking about. And while one of them is "meditate", two more of them are "utilize semen retention" and "take game-enhancing drugs", and suddenly, I've learned even more about these douchewaffles than I ever wanted to. But hey, ladies, doesn't it make you feel better to know that this guy is only talking to you because he's been deliberately not jerking it for weeks and is hopped up on a combination of herbal painkillers and mood stabilizers? Yay!

In case you're wondering how the election of Donald Trump will affect pick-up artistry, I looked at the five ways Troy Francis provided in his article, and I still can't tell you. I know he thinks there'll be a "trickle down" effect, which is just gross. I know he thinks political correctness is dead, which means I guess now he can call women "dumb broads" and they'll leap for his cock like it was a lifeboat on the Titanic. Trump's election will also, as far as I can tell, cause women to lower their standards, a vital part of any of these asshats' strategies. But the rest of it is pure RoK word salad. So the election of Trump hasn't taught any of them to fucking write, either.