What Are Your Excuses for Not Changing?

April 1, 2017
What excuses have you created for yourself today? You might think you are too old to start studying Chinese or that the things you want to do can wait until later. You might not encourage yourself to continue towards that objective you had set for yourself with so much enthusiasm. Maybe this is so because you start feeling tired and having doubts. It is not about fear. It’s not about having the ability to do something or not. Curiously enough, it is not about having confidence either. All of this is the product of your own excuses, of the reasons your mind creates. Unfortunately, you start leaning on these excuses.

The difference between the people who have acceptable lives and those who have excellent lives is not the absence of fear. Better yet, it is the absence of excuses.

We are all scared, since fear is a natural emotion. And yes, it’s true that many times it blocks us, paralyzes us and keeps us from moving forward with what we want. However, fear doesn’t make us throw in the towel. This action is one we execute for and by ourselves based on our own will. We hide behind multiple excuses that have no reason for being. Fear leads us towards them. Insecurity does too. That way, we redirect our sensations to the ample world of excuses.

Are you committed to what you want?

Let’s give the example that you are trying to be more responsible or that you are thinking about changing jobs, because the one you have does not satisfy you. Of course, you have a clear objective, but you are missing something. You might have doubts about whether you will be able to achieve it or not. You might start supposing that it will not be worth it. Without realizing it, you will start procrastinating.

Procrastinating means leaving for tomorrow what you could do today. Yet, due to different circumstances you decide to postpone these things or tasks. This means that in reality you are not as fully committed to your objective as you might think. When you truly want something, you try to delay it as little as possible. There are no valid “buts” about it. Tomorrow you might not have the opportunity that is being presented to you today. You get things done by moving around the chess pieces and not by staring at the board passively.

woman with horse

Let’s imagine that we have a temper which is causing us problems in our relationships, or even problems at work. We have had several wake-up calls. Yet, we have responded each time with “Yes, I have to change the way I treat the people around me”. You consider that other people are right and also don’t like the way you behave in certain occasions. Nevertheless, as the days go by, everything remains the same. You do nothing and modify nothing. The big question here is “Why?”.

Only by acting, by doing, by moving the chess pieces, will you make everything you want a reality.

The answer can be found in the fact that in your mind the word “tomorrow” is always prowling about. However when that next day comes around you have already forgotten what you postponed. You are not really committed to the change, because laziness overcomes you. It might even be that you consider that you are too old to modify certain aspects about yourself. However, this is a fallacy. Age can be a conditioning factor, but our thoughts are also a determining factor. And they hold greater weight.

Do you really do… or you just think you do?

Phrases like these will surely seem familiar to you: “It is not worth it for me to make the effort, because I am not getting the desired results”. However, have you already put in the effort or are you simply predicting what might happen? Sometimes, we are not sincere with ourselves. We justify our behavior based on something that has not happened yet. This occurs because we are not truly committed, as we have mentioned before.

The problem is that human beings sometimes let themselves be fooled so they can believe they are doing something useful. In reality, they are not moving in order to get what they want. Each excuse makes us feel better, like victims of circumstances which don’t allow us to reach what we desire.  However, this is a big lie. Think, do you really want to achieve what you are saying or are you just saying it?

redheaded woman

In life, there are paths which truly make us panic, regardless of whether they are forced upon us or imposed by ourselves. Not only when we try to mold our personality, but when we embark on a new adventure. For example, such as starting college again or leaving a job in order to do what actually satisfies us. But it is all a matter of will, of wanting it and making the effort. There is no easy way out, but this difficulty is what can help us flow if we face it in the best way possible.

It does not matter if you think it is not the right moment, nor whether you have all the resources to achieve it or not. The truth is that you’ll rarely have all of the resources you need, not even with all the time in the world. No matter what doubts may arise which tell you “Don’t do it!”. Do it anyway, without giving yourself any excuse.

Many of the limits that you consider real only exist in your head. You can put an end to these limits if you confront them with reality. It is not necessary for you to lie, not to yourself and not to others. If you do not want to go towards something, then don’t do it. But if you do want to reach a certain goal, do it without second thoughts. Without any excuses, without procrastinating, without doubting…Get things done without thinking too much about it. Because when our minds start to get crammed with ideas, we get blocked to the point of becoming completely paralyzed.