Yup, Draymond Green Is Just Straight Up Kicking People

The term "unnatural leg extension" is generous to Draymond. He should just cut the shit.

by Liam Daniel Pierce
04 December 2016, 8:26pm

Draymond Green is definitely the kind of person you want as your friend. Not because I imagine he'd be a good friend—though he very well could be. But because you wouldn't want to come up against him at any point. This pertains to shit talk, defensive basketball skills, and the general wellbeing of your body. Yes, I'm talking about his absolute crystal-clear propensity to kick people.

This is a lot, coming from me: a shamelessly biased Warriors fan who grew up in Oakland. Like any true sports fan, I'm going to come up with all kinds of absurd rationale to reconcile the cognitive dissonance of loving a team with an asshole on it. But things have gone much too far and even I've run out of excuses. Draymond Green is just kicking people.

The best case scenario that I see for Draymond is that he has a childish way of complaining about what he perceives to be unfair contact. By extending his body out as far as he can to show you where someone gave him a boo-boo. This is stupid and wack and not every part of your body is that reflex-heavy secret spot under your knee that your doctor likes to hit with a funny mallet. Grow up.

But that's the best case scenario. What we're staring down now, though, is the near-unequivocal reality that Draymond Green is kicking people with intent. He has denied such allegations, mocking the league by saying "I'm not sure if they took kinesiology" after they issued him a flagrant-1 for an "unnatural leg extension" (a generous depiction of what happened).

What Draymond seems to be saying is that this is just how his body naturally moves, meaning he's built in some Donald Trump-like incredulity at the preposterous possibility that he has ever done anything wrong. He just needs to be the big enough man to say: "you know what? I've seen the tapes, and that's something I'll have to look out for in the future." You are also not a kinesiologist, bruh.

In the above clip, when Draymond earned the technical against Harden, it's pretty clear that his leg had no business being up by a 6'5" tall man's head—even if he's only somewhat vertical. I know you need to balance yourself when you're falling backwards, but seriously?

And as if there was any doubt left, last night's game against Phoenix sealed the deal:

Just look at where Draymond's head is when he's kicking this poor man in the butt. It is down, level, staring straight at his victim. He is not falling down. He is not stabilizing himself. His arms already drew the contact—why the leg, dude? And how does he conduct himself after the kick? No remorse.

It's pretty damning evidence. You're a serial kicker, Draymond, and that makes you kind of an asshole. But can we still be friends? My nether regions depend on it.