How to speak to your boss about your mental health


Man and woman in meeting room at work
kupicooGetty Images

It's not always easy to speak to friends and family about a mental health problem, let alone a manager.

For many people, this might seem like an impossible task – and there is no legal obligation to disclose a mental health problem to a boss – but for some, being open about it may be a good way to get better support in a work environment.

Almost one in three people experience mental health issues while in employment, but recent research by mental health charity Mind found only one in four of 15,000 employees at major UK companies would seek support from a manager.

"After having spent many years trying to cover it up and pretend it wasn't real I thought it better to be honest," says 31-year-old Kasha Khan. "The aim was to gain understanding from my manager so that if I was to have any struggles it wouldn't be a shock."

Initially, Khan was nervous about speaking to his employers – who he worried would see him as less competent - but his fears were soon put to rest.

"What I did to inform her was to arrange a meeting to discuss my health problems with solutions on how they can be managed," Khan says. "This was followed up with a discussion with the occupational health team who confirmed or suggested ideas."

"I work for a really supportive company that encourages diversity and support. My manager knows when I am not myself and I feel comfortable telling her when I am having a bad day," he says.

"This means I don't keep it all bottled inside and struggle to pretend everything is alright even when it's not."

sturtiGetty Images

Not every workplace has such a supportive culture - and talking to a line manager about a condition isn't always as straightforward. In an ideal world, an employee wouldn't be judged for having a mental health problem, but as it stands, mental health is still a taboo and stigma is very real.

But keeping a problem hidden at work may make it worse. "We all have mental health just as we all have physical health, and it can fluctuate," says Emma Mamo, head of workplace wellbeing at mental health charity Mind.

"Things like long working hours, excessive workload, and poor relationships with colleagues can all lead to unmanageable stress, which in turn can worsen or cause a mental health problem."

And so although it might be daunting, there are steps you can take to make telling your boss about a mental health problem easier.

Find a safe space to talk

Making sure you are comfortable and at ease while speaking to your employer is crucial. A quiet, private room where you and your boss aren't too constrained by time will make the conversation easier.

"Ideally, your manager or supervisor would create a space for you to talk about any issues you're facing – personal or professional – by regularly checking in with staff or by including a 'temperature check' in meetings," says Mamo.

"It depends on the relationship you have with your manager, but if you have a good relationship and trust them, you could meet them one to one to discuss what's going on."

Be honest

Being as truthful as you can be about a problem is essential as it will help your employer understand what you need

It's best to be concise about your feelings. You might want to consider having Mind's resource information for employers to hand, as it provides trusted information on conditions and ways to provide support.

It might also be helpful to have a note from your doctor to explain what the problem is, how it may affect you and what adjustments might help you manage your work.

"It is more and more common to find workplaces where people feel able to talk about their wellbeing and mental health," Mamo says.

"As attitudes begin to change, more companies and organisations are asking the right questions and taking the right steps to start the conversation with their employees."

Make reasonable suggestions

Ultimately, it is up to your employer to decide the best way to provide support, but you can suggest reasonable changes including: changes to your working area, changes to your working hours and occasionally working from home.

Earlier this year, a web developer in the US sparked a global conversation about workplace attitudes to mental illness after asking her boss for two days off.

In an email titled 'Where's Madalyn', she told colleagues: "I'm taking today and tomorrow to focus on my mental health. Hopefully I'll be back next week refreshed and back to 100%".

CEO Ben Congleton replied to the message, saying: "I can't believe this is not standard practice at all organisations," adding: "You are an example to us all, and help cut through the stigma so we can all bring our whole selves to work."

Morsa ImagesGetty Images

In the UK, there's no legal difference between taking a mental health sick day and a day off for a physical injury.

According to data from the Office for National Statistic Labour Force Survey, 15.8 million days off work last year were for a stated mental health condition – including depression and anxiety.

If you need to, have someone from HR there

"Having someone from HR present will make the meeting more formal, and normally wouldn't be necessary in the first instance," Mamo says.

"But if you didn't get anywhere with the first meeting then it might be a sensible next step."

If you don't get anywhere with your managers and HR - don't give up.

If you are being treated differently or your job is affected because you disclosed a mental health problem, you can seek advice from Mind's legal line (0300 466 6463) or Acas.

Remember your rights

If you have a mental health problem and you want the protection of the Equality Act, you have to tell your employer about it, Mamo says.

"Under the Equality Act 2010, employers have a legal duty to provide reasonable adjustments for an employee who has a disability, which can include a mental health problem if it has a substantial, adverse, and long-term effect on normal day-to-day activities," she explains.

"Typically, when it comes to mental health problems, these are small, inexpensive changes, such as more regular catch ups with managers, change of workspace, working hours, or breaks. But we know that too often, people stay quiet, fearing being deemed incapable, unable to cope or weak. It shouldn't be that way."

Being open benefits your employer too


In total mental health problems cost British employers around £30 billion a year through lost production, recruitment and absence - so in short, it is in an employer's interests to ensure workers are healthy and happy.

Advertisement - Continue Reading Below
More From Healthy mind