You Don't Have to Tell the Elders Anything!

by minimus 25 Replies latest jw friends

  • slimboyfat

    Mostly a good idea, except possibly when they’ve already got evidence, and ask you to confess as a test of repentance. Need to be careful because it’s a rigged game. Not that I have any experience of this. It’s what I gather from what others have said.

  • stan livedeath
    stan livedeath
    westiebilly1126 minutes ago

    My mistake was to be honest, trusting, and friendly. I was DF with no tangible evidence bar my own admittance that I had had a meal with my wife's carer in broad daylight (deemed to be 'brazen conduct') to repay her care

    was the carer disfellowshipped ?

  • westiebilly11

    No, my late wife's carer was not a JW. She was part of a team of carers . Whilst most of the carers worked to rule and only did the minimum, this carer went out of her way to ensure my wife was comfortable, cared for, and even took her out in her mobility chair, unpaid. Had the carer been male, I'd have been equally appreciative.

  • ZindagiNaMilegiDobaara


    Maybe I am ignorant since when did having a meal with anyone inside or outside become the definition of brazen conduct .Check this definiton from thier website

    Brazen conduct

    From the Greek a·selʹgei·a, a phrase pertaining to acts that are serious violations of God’s laws and that reflect a brazen or boldly contemptuous attitude; a spirit that betrays disrespect or even contempt for authority, laws, and standards. The expression does not refer to wrong conduct of a minor nature.​—Ga 5:19; 2Pe 2:7.

    I am so sorry you have to go through this when you are dealing with illness of your wife.You should be given a lot more moral support and help not otherwise when you are going through a difficult time yourself. I hope she is much better now.


  • Crazyguy

    They can df you for anything. A friend had a friendship with a female at work while he was going through marital problems. He mentioned this to his elders why I don’t know. They he and his female friend never had sex never even touched one another, yet it was deemed in Christian so he was dfd.

    By the way his wife had already left him claiming he wasn’t a good spiritual head and they ofcourse supported her in her divorce of him even with no evidence of foul play on his part.


    You Don't Have to Tell the Elders Anything!

    Twenty years ago I asked my 20-year-old disfellowshipped cousin... Why in the world did you would admit to committing fornication with your girlfriend? Guilty people go to court and plead not guilty. Why would you admit guilt to the Elders when you knew that you would be disfellowshipped or marked? Why not say that you had a girlfriend but was chaste?

    My cousin told me that he needed to tell the Elders because his conscience was bothering him.

    You dummy!!!!!!!!!.... The Elders would have needed to be in the same room with you and your girlfriend and catch you in the act. It's better to live with a guilty conscience than lose your family.

    My cousin was disfellowshipped twenty years ago and to this day is still shunned from his dad, sister, and the rest of the family. He has been told numerous times...Unless you come back to the meetings and get reinstated, we cannot have any contact with you or your wife.

  • btlc

    Opening post should be printed and nailed to congregation's clipboard!

  • Slidin Fast
    Slidin Fast

    I think if I was accused I would insist on legal representation and/or arrange for a lawyers letter warning of a lawsuit should I an announcement about me be made from the platform.

    I would never again be subjected to a kangaroo court.

  • zeb

    Is it rue that in the 'secret' elders book it says that to attend a jc is to accept the elders authority.?

  • OnTheWayOut

    Excellent post subject, Minimus.

    Truly, whether you are questioning the org or are involved in a violation of the rules, steer clear of the elders.

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