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City of Nightmares, salt & paprika and a question mark walked into a bar?

posted 20 Mar 2015, 00:00 by Adrian Kirby   [ updated 20 Mar 2015, 02:44 ]
Hi all,

Still very warm here, despite it nominally being autumn. So warm that we have a plague of wasps in Melbourne, which is essentially the most terrifying thing I can imagine. Worst of all if you read that article is that one of the picnic parks it tells you to avoid is the park directly opposite my house! I have seen a lot of wasps but haven't been stung yet. Yet.

Got forwarded this very funny article of grammar jokes that I will now reprint in its entirety:

1. A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves. 

2. A dangling modifier walks into a bar. After finishing a drink, the bartender asks it to leave.

3. A question mark walks into a bar?

4. Two quotation marks “walk into” a bar.

5. A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to drink.

6. The bar was walked into by the passive voice.

7. Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They drink. They leave. 

Much better than puns, I'm sure you will agree.

Finally, I'm about to trim my beard down so I look less homeless but here is a photo for posterity. It's a bit more salt and paprika than I'd like it to be but at my age I guess I have to savour the paprika while it lasts:

EDIT: That's better