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Production Code: 1AGE06
Original Airdate : October 18, 2002
Written by: Ben Edlund
Directed by: Marita Grabiak


Magistrate Higgins - Gregory Itzin Bartender - John Jabaley
Mudder Man - Daniel Bess  Foreman - Jordan Lund 
Stitch Hessian - Kevin Gage Woman - Laura Niemi
Fess Higgins - Zachary Kranzler Prod - Simon Brooke
Well-Dressed Man - Bob McCracken Mudder Elder - Clement E. Blake
Busker - Ronald Craig Williams   


       Simon and Kaylee are discussing Simon’s cussing habits, or lack there of as Jayne is making a racket in the infirmary, tearing through everything looking for tape so he can better hide a gun on himself. Jayne is expecting trouble on the planet they are headed for because he has a history with the place, but Mal refuses to let Jayne arm himself for this run.
       They land on a planet, fairly dusty and whose main commodity is clay. As they head out on the surface, Jayne is wearing goggles and a hood low on his face and Simon is joining them on this one, posing as the buyer (since he does look rich). The crew thinks Jayne is over-reacting until they come upon a large mud statue of Jayne in the town.  Jayne explains that he stole some money from the town’s magistrate named Higgins. Meanwhile Inara is meeting with Higgins who happens to be employing her for their time on the planet.
         The crew is in a local bar talking about the statue of Jayne and drinking a local concoction of vitamins and alcohol when a man in on their deal tells them their cargo is set, they just need to  quietly sneak it out successfully. Just then people begin to sing a song about Jayne. The song explains that these people see Jayne as a Robin-Hood style hero because the money he stole he dropped on the people. Jayne explains he was having trouble in the get-away and had to dump the money to escape and the people gathered it, thinking it was a gift from him. And when Jayne goes to the bar, he is recognized and celebrations begin. Jayne Day is then set to be held the next day in his honor and Mal takes this as a good diversion so they can slip out their cargo.
          Higgins introduces Inara to his son, the reason he hired her. He asks her to make a man out of him because he is still a virgin , not yet “a man” at 26. While Inara is spending time with the magistrate’s son, Higgins is told about Jayne’s return. And Kaylee and Simon, who had been having a good time at the bar have a misunderstanding so that Simon is left alone at the bar.
        Higgins is out for revenge on Jayne so he frees a prisoner named Stitch, who apparently worked with Jayne and has been imprisoned for years for the theft gone wrong and caused him to lose an eye. Higgins arms him and sends him out for his revenge. Stitch grabs Simon and beats him up a little and plans on using him to get to Jayne. Meanwhile Higgins son informs Inara of Jayne’s history with these people and also that his father put a land lock on his ship so he can’t get away.
            Jayne day arrives and some of Serenity’s crew are working on getting the cargo out as Jayne is enjoying himself and is giving a not so bad speech when Stitch arrives to cause trouble, throwing a beaten up Simon into the crowd. The crowd of locals finds out the truth as Stitches begins to reveal that they had to dump everything off of the ship if there was going to be an escape after being shot at and Jayne threw Stitch off as well, before he dumped the money. Stitch shoots at Jayne but a local boy throws himself in front, taking the hit  for Jayne who then throws a knife at Stitch and proceeds to beat him to death. Angry at it all, Jayne yells at the people for thinking of him as a hero and then he knocks over his statue.
            Wash is having troubling taking off but just after Inara asks him if there is trouble, the land lock is removed and the take off. Turns out Higgins's son overrode the lock to his father’s fury and his son rubs it in that now he is a man and is rather pleased with himself.
            Jayne is trying to deal with the whole situation  when Mal explains to him that it’s not so much what Jayne did but what the people needed.

Read the Script
Memorable Quotes:
Simon: "I reattached a girl's leg. Her whole leg.
She named her hamster after me. I got a hamster.
He drops a box
of money, he gets a town."
River: "Bible's broken. Contradictions, false logistics - doesn't make sense."
Book: "You don't fix faith. Faith fixes you."
Kaylee: "Bye, now. Have good sex."

Simon: "To Jayne! The box-dropping, man-ape-gone-wrong-thing."
Mal:  "It's my estimation that...every man ever got a statue made of him,
was one kind of sumbitch or another. Ain't about you, Jayne. About what they need."


Section Editor: Cassandra   -   Email Cassandra   -   Cassandra's Bio   -   Last Edited on: July 30, 2005

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