Saturday, 3 July 2010

Happy Fourth of July!!! Yay for American Independence!!!!

Or not -- we here at Something Wicked pondered how to celebrate the Fourth of July -- a holiday for the American, Nicole, and for Brit Marissa it brings back memories of travelling as she spent the 4th July in Sacramento many years ago.

So here's what we're doing -- Nicole is listing the four things she misses/-is glad to be without with regards to the UK, while Marissa is listing the four things she loves, and loves to hate, about America.


Oh United Kingdom, how do I love thee, let me count the ways:

1) Tea -- coffee just doesn't do it for me, Tea is the ultimate beverage, hot or cold, Oolong or Earl Grey -- the colors, the smell, the flavors -- the British are really on to something there!

2) Shakespeare -- his plays are timeless, they apply today as much as they did way back when. And he wrote them in iambic pentameter -- good grief! I struggle with regular English!

3) Sexy British accents on men -- my girlfriends and I went on a girls' weekend to the beach last year and we changed the Tom Tom's voice to be a male British accent. Way!

4) Last, but certainly not least -- Dracula. Probably the best account of the modern-day vampire tale, and the reason why Marissa and I have entered the literary field.

And now, four reasons I'm glad that I don't live in the UK:

1) Spelling -- what's with all the extra 'u's in words? Favourite? Colour? And 's's instead of 'z's?? It's apologizzzzzze, gang. Oh, and it's z, just plain z - - not 'zed'!

2) The crime rate -- I mean, they certainly have enough detectives on the case, but who wants to live in those quaint English villages where the neighbors are always offing each other through poison and such? And sometimes even Scotland Yard is clueless and you've got to rely on elderly spinsters to solve the crimes!

3) Daleks -- thank goodness they only seem to land on the British Isles!

4) Rain -- although I can see that the Brits do make good use of all that water -- putting it into beer, which is the color of the sunshine, ... sort of!

Marissa. Okay, here goes.

Things I love about America:

1.) The food! Oh my God - you guys have some of the most amazing food. You can literally get whatever the hell you want and the portions are HUGE! Southern cooking is my favourite.

2.) The Southern accent on men (can you see a theme going here?). I think the guy from Lost is responsible for this little fetish, but then TrueBlood has just brought it all back again. I love accents - they make people sound so much more interesting than they actually are!

3.) Halloween! I love Halloween, but we Brits just don't know how to do it properly. The most we can manage is a couple of old pumpkins and then everyone pretends not to be in when you go trick or treating. America goes the whole hog and I love that!

4.) Obama. Whatever people think of his politics I think it says a huge amount about the leaps and bounds America has taken in their views to elect a black president.

Things I love to hate about America.

1.) American 'end-the-world movies'. Why-oh-why is it always only America who saves the world from destruction by impending alien attack/asteroid/global warming? The rest of us might get a very brief mention somewhere along the line, but then we just get forgotten about and America saves the day... cue, waving flags and the American anthem.

2.) Lollipop head girls with small dogs wearing clothes. I don't think I need to explain this one. The poor dogs must be thinking 'My cousin is a wolf - how the hell did I end up in a Gucci handbag with a bow on my head?'

3.) Very long scary roads through the desert. These empty roads are just destined to have psychopathic rednecks waiting to pick up unsuspecting travellers in camper vans for them to torture. My husband wants to do an American road trip one day, but this will be the one thing that will put me off (well, that and my over-active imagination).

4.) The spelling! Hey, Nicole - we invented the stuff. After all, it's called the English language! It's colour, not color, and it's only your accent that turns all the 's's into z's!

Happy 4th of July everybody!


  1. Very nice, Ladies. I enjoyed the pro and con, as well as the bit on the English inventing the English language. I also like the flames on your blog...I'm not sure why. There's just something about them that speaks to me, something familiar, perhaps? It'll come to me... ;)

  2. Ha-ha Jimmy! We're actually thinking about renaming the blog 'Dance on Flames.' We thought it had a good ring to it!

  3. Hey girls that was a great 4th of July post. I'm not being drawn into the spelling discussion. Each to their own is my motto.

    Nicole on the whole tea issue I think least said best mended (The Boston Tea Party wasn't a social event).

    What is it with accents? Personally the only sexy one is the French. When is Bastille Day?

    Take care both of you and have a happy weekend.

  4. Loved the pros and cons!

    And being a woman from the South I'd like to clear up a misconception - the term "redneck" refers to the coal miners of West Virginia who wore red kerchiefs around their necks supporting the unionization of miners.

    It has since become a term we all use to bash ignorant people with reddish brown necks with pasty bodies under their shirts- the implication was thought to mean men that worked in the sun (like farmers), but it was much more literal.

    Want me to tell you how Nascar came into being next? I never understood how that was considered a "sport". But just like spelling, to each their own. ;-)

  5. Hey James, Gaynor, and CJ -- thanks for stopping by!

    CJ -- interesting to know that about the term "redneck" -- I always thought it referred to the Scotch-Irish settlers who settled in the Southern US and got sunburns from working in the heat. As for NASCAR -- I married a Louisiana man who actually attended the Talladega races -- more than I ever wanted to know about the sport, LOL!