What Would Father's Day Be Without Some Advice From A Dad? Here's 10 Tips To Succeed In Life

I'm picking up my son from college today. Next Friday, it's my daughter’s high school graduation. Come September, I’ll be an empty nester. It’ll be just me, my wife, two Sheltie dogs and two cats.

Time flew by so quickly and I can’t even begin to wrap my mind around how this happened. It's made me a little sentimental and thoughtful about life—mistakes made, paths not taken, missed opportunities, taking things for granted and some success. Since Sunday is Father’s Day, I’d like to offer some advice based upon the lessons I have learned along the way. I’m not one to talk about your personal life, but I can certainly help with your career. Sometimes, the two are inextricably intertwined.

1. When you’re young, be true to yourself and stand up for your beliefs and dreams. Too many people, including parents, friends, teachers and the media will push, cajole and pressure you into being someone you’re not. They don't want to acknowledge who you are as an individual and what you’d like to do with your life. Start to stand up for yourself at an early age; otherwise, you’ll end up living someone else’s version of a life. The career you choose won't be because it's the one you want. You will take that path—that’s not right for you—as not to offend or disappoint your parents and succumb to societal pressures. Don't let this happen to you. You’re better off failing—while pursuing your own meaningful path—than achieving a modicum of success in a career you’re disconnected from and don’t derive any meaning or enjoyment from it.

2. Today, it seems that everyone’s going to college. It's ridiculously expensive and incredibly competitive once you graduate. Try to pick a major that will enable you to obtain a decent job that could lead to something big down the road. I understand that you want the college experience, taking easy-A classes, declaring a bogus major and spending your time drinking, smoking pot and goofing off with your friends. With hundreds of thousands of dollars in student loans and the ensuring crushing debt that you’ll bear, this is a shortsighted approach toward college. Use this time to learn something valuable, which will enable you to quickly pay back your loans, start a family, purchase a home and lead a comfortable life.

3. Work sucks. It's hard, exhausting and most bosses don't appreciate what you do at the office. Some other guy will get the promotion who doesn't deserve it. At some point in your career, you’ll be fired or find yourself afraid of losing your job. You’ll feel that the world is out to get you. This happens to everyone, only nobody likes to talk about it because they all want people to think that they’re successful and appear to have their lives together. Since its tough no matter what, you should select a job that you enjoy, are good at it and will offer at least a reasonable living. I don't necessarily believe the adage, “If you love what you do, you’ll never work a day in your life.” Even if you love what you do, there will be days that you feel miserable and dread going into the office. However, if you generally derive meaning and enjoyment from your work, there will be more good days than bad. It's the same with a marriage or any relationship. You will experience ups and downs and you will have to work hard at it all the time, making concessions, biting your tongue and letting go of slights to make it successful.

4. If you are going to spend the vast majority of your life working, you might as well be good at. Don't be a slacker, complainer or pessimist. It's too easy and the path of least resistance. Spend the 10,000 hours to become a master of your job. Become great at it. Then, the money and congratulations will come your way. You’ll also be happy knowing that you excel at something you enjoy.

5. There is no upside to making enemies, fighting with people and having nemeses. Life is too short to spend it arguing and fighting over petty stuff. Focus on positive activities that move you forward in your career. Help others without expecting anything in return. The irony is that the good deeds will come back to you in the future. If someone is generally abusive, then fight back with everything you have, extricate yourself from the toxic environment or find another opportunity.

6. Put in as much time and energy as you can when you are young and have unbounded energy. It's all about building a skill stack of experiences and creating a toolbox of knowledge that will last your entire career. Yes, you will miss out on some partying, but you will retire with a fat bank account, while the others labor away into their late 70s.

7. Live far below your means. I come across so many people that earn one dollar and spend three. They have big homes, fancy sports cars, take exotic vacations and brag all the time. Meanwhile, they also don't have any savings, are deeply in debt and prisoners of their jobs because if they lose it, they’ll lose everything.

8. If you can, move back home to save money. Put the extra money you have from not paying an exorbitant rent and ordering out from Uber Eats into the bank or invest it in the stock market. It will compound, grow and one day it will be a second income stream for you or a retirement nest egg.

9. As hard as you work and no matter what type of stress and pressure you deal with, don't bring it home and take it out on your family. They are the only ones who you will love you unconditionally. Spend as much quality time with them as possible. Before you know it, your kids will be out of the house. Your parents will get old, pass away and you’ll regret the past acrimony and miss them terribly.

10. My dad died less than a year after my mom passed away from cancer. We had to shop for her casket, while she slowly deteriorated in unrelenting pain. I’m not exactly sure what happened to my father, but he fell into a coma. I, ultimately, had to direct the doctors to pull the plug (he had a do-not-resuscitate order). We talked about these things while he was alive, so I knew and honored his wishes. You must learn to be strong. Life is difficult and filled with adversity. It's easy to fall apart. Somehow, you need to find a way to be tough, resilient, thick-skinned and learn to keep your head when everyone else can’t cope.

