Saturday, December 08, 2007

Let's talk about sex: Sex Education

This song is dedicated to , Ching, JC Smith, Grifter and Manilenya. I would encourage the readers to please listen to the song while reading the rest of my story.

My sister sent me a message as soon as she saw me online. She said that their home PC's desktop had some anime... porn anime! I don't know if it's hentai or not. Apparently she was flabbergasted by the discovery and the fact that her eldest son wouldn't admit to downloading the porn. I was grinning while she was telling me the story. I told her, "well, he's a warm blooded boy!" I guess this made her think a bit and she said, "At least he's not gay. I told hubby to take it easy on him. It's just normal diba?" Of course.

I wasn't surprised if my sister and her husband's initial reactions were shock and distress, I would think all parents would have the same reaction. Parents need to have the right perspective on this kind of situation. We all went to through this stage of sexual curiosity, probably not all of us but most of us at this stage of puberty started to wonder, to look around and discover things that amazed us. Do you remember the time you saw nude pictures of the opposite sex or the first time you read a porn magazine? If you remember that time and remember how it felt, then you should know how your kid feels now. You need to understand and accept that sexual curiosity is normal.

Parents should discuss sex with their children by the onset of puberty and parent's should discuss this topic sensibly and with some level of accuracy of facts. Giving teenagers the wrong idea or information may screw up their kid's psyche.
When I was in 4th year high school, I used to hang out with 4 girls from my batch but from different sections. One of my barkada had a bf, she was the only one in our group to have one. Anyway, one day she appeared a bit uneasy and troubled. We asked her what was bugging her, she said she is in trouble because she may be pregnant. We were all shocked! Pregnant at 16 and weeks away from graduation. We asked her how it happened. She said that one night, her mom went to bed early. Her bf went to their house to spend time with her. They talked and talked till it reached to a point that the guy kissed her. Then we asked her what happened next, she said that was it, they just kissed and now she could be pregnant. We all laughed at her story. We told her that no one gets pregnant by kissing. She said her mother told her that if a man kissed a woman, the woman will get pregnant. We laughed even harder at this story. We insisted that her mother's story is not true. I asked her how she passed 2nd year Biology class without knowing anything about reproduction. She said she knows text book information on reproduction but it seemed all just rote knowledge. We asked her if she did some torrid lip locking with her bf, she said it was just a peck on the cheek. We assured her that she wasn't pregnant at all and she can graduate and go on with her life. A classic! The story is funny but I learned a few years ago that some parents really tell their kids (girls) that kissing can make them pregnant. Akala ko joke, totoo pala!

But what if my friend didn't open up to us about her "dilemma" and she just assumed that she's pregnant, what would she have done? Her mother is known for her controlling and dominating nature, kinda having a closedmind and probinsya mentality. I'm pretty sure my friend was seriously worried that time. Would she have told her mother? Would she have asked her bf to marry her or elope with her? Would she have killed herself? She would probably have gotten married at an early age. I think her family would have immediately assumed she's really pregnant, no questions asked. This is how parents screw their kids' minds.

Another funny story I heard from my cousin is that of her married friends' sex life, or no sex life for that matter. She has this couple friends who attend the same religious organization with her, they are laking Manila and studied in good schools here. They were complaining that they could not get pregnant. So my cousin who is a doctor, asked them questions and she discovered that they were not having sex often. Kaya naman pala! How can they get pregnant if they have sex once a month? I'm not sure if I remember her story right but I think the couple's idea of sex is strictly for pro-creation and having sex for any other purpose is WRONG. Bwahahaha! I think she tried to explain to her friends that sex is a good thing for married couples and that they need to have frequent sex inorder to increase their chances of getting pregnant but they seemed closed minded. This is how religion screws up people's minds.

This reminds me of how some sectors of society blocked the ruling on having sex education in public schools. I think that schools can be a good venue for students to learn sex. Hopefully, schools can provide an objective and clean approach to teaching sex. HOPEFULLY. Of course, it's still best practice to have the parents talk to their kids about sex, that is if the parents do not give false information or try to scare their kids from having sex at all. Besides, a lot of parents do not feel comfortable discussing sex with their kids. I certainly do not agree that the church or any organized form or religion should start campaigning about the dangers of sex and all that churkiness.

Good luck!

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pearljem said...

kakatawa naman kwento mo ate...kung kahit kiss lng e mabubuntis na...edi lalo na dami tao sa mundo. nyahaha! kakaiba namang nanay yun...

grifter said...

nice read. reminds me to set my future kids straight, and to do something to produce future kids (logs off computer ...)

cathy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
cathy said...

ahaha.. I was just reminded of an experience when I'm not-so-young anymore. We were listening to the radio when a condom advertisement was aired (?). I asked an innocent question - why do condoms have to have flavors when you don't eat "it" naman.

They started laughing real hard, including my grandmother who was with us and I really didn't understand why they couldn't stop. Later on, it was explained rin naman. Haha.

Well. Wala lang. Natuwa lang ako sa post mo. And btw, dumaan din ako sa stage where I thought it was the kissing part that makes us pregnant (but I am sure I got that from t.v. not from my parents).

Mec said...

which is why sex education should be an integral part of learning in schools... and parent-child conversations

no child is too young to be educated about sex... i don't mean you tell a five year old about condoms and stuff, but you can tell him or her about physiological differences between a boy and a girl in words he/she can understand... that's a start...

Anonymous said...

i read somewhere that teachers who conduct sex ed classes should be married people because they are more knowledgeable about the subject.

what a requirement... oh well.

BURAOT said...

hokey... bago ako makipag-sex.... eto quickie lang ito..

meri krismas sa imo fionski. bagay sa yo talaga username mo, me pagka kinky ata mga post mo. heheheh.

meri krismas sa yo at naway masarap at hindi malamig ang pasko mo. (hmmpt! buti ka pa. huhuhuu)

sanay matupad mo ang lahat ng mga wish mo ngayong christmas. cheers!

Austin Pinoy said...

so... where can i meet girls like this? hehehe