Dear Abby: "Left Out in Florida" (Sept. 2) feels it is inconsiderate of her daughter-in-law to speak only her native language (not English) with her children in front of their grandparents. You advised that the mother should speak English in this situation.

My son attends a bilingual immersion school, and I have experience with this issue. I have attended lectures about raising bilingual children.

It is extremely difficult to pass on a language other than English to kids living in America. As the children grow, they will be increasingly drawn to English. The most successful families are those who do exactly what the mom in the letter is doing. They speak only their native language with their children and are very persistent about it. This is the recommendation of the experts in the field.

What should also be happening is translation for others when necessary. Ideally, there is a level of support from family and friends who understand what a worthwhile, yet difficult, task this is. Grandparents don't need to understand everything that is said, and their job is to speak English with the youngsters so they become truly bilingual.

Bilingualism is an incredible gift to give a child. It goes beyond just learning another language. It broadens mental development, thought patterns and world perspective. It must be done during childhood while the brain is still pliable, and continue until adulthood or the language will be lost.

These parents obviously understand the value of what they are doing. I hope the grandparents will support it. — Bilingual Mom in Oregon

Dear Bilingual Mom: Thank you for lending your insight. I heard from others who, like you, have firsthand knowledge on this issue.

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