Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Fabio, The Vampire Bird and The Little Jail Bird Escapes From The Pen

Fabio, The Vampire Cockatiel
I know I should have used my welder's gloves! I love my new ones for the horses and also for the disbudding come spring-time when I use the hot iron on the kid goats. The perfect way to handle an escaped "Vampire Bird" our Cocktail.(Wow, is that how it's spelled? Nope, I found-out that it's a alcoholic drink that I promise, I've never tasted.)It is Cockatiel! Anyway, my daughter Tressa has the perfect nickname for him and it's "Carpet Shark" She could have called him a "man-eater" but I'm sure she didn't want to alarm me. She's had these birds before.

My other daughter Larin, that lives in Wyoming, knows Fabio well and has given me the advice time to time to but in the freezer to cool down that temper and even made mention that I should make a Middle Eastern gourmet meal out-of-him by making Fabio into coyote kabobs and set the plate out by the crik. She did see a cute way to fix his cage into a charming outdoor planter. I have to admit, I was tempted.

I've never played "Angry Birds" ever. I figured I already had one. Steve told me in the game, the birds are mad for a reason and there's pigs. I don't like pigs, except to eat. Just to set the record straight, all pigs dislike me too. I've only petted one pig that didn't bite me. My grand daughter's fair pig. She had to hold her pig and I touched the pig's hindquarters. Yes, I know what pigs feel like, we've had them, raised them, and I've had to do the all shots, and worming, and the mucking. It's not a hard job usually but try doing that all the while, trying to dodge the ankle-biters. So, not to get off the subject like I do all the time ... I just want to say between the birds and the pigs, I'm not playing. Is it a game that would help me like Fabio? I bet not, but I know one Cockatiel the game company forgot to add. Right?

I don't know what I was thinking when he jumped-out of his door when I was feeding. He was hissing at me like a snake warning me that something was up and I should have been warned. When am I going to listen to my head and not mess with stuff when I know darn-well something bad's going to happen? I was in a hurry and that's when disaster strikes. I still picked him up with my bare hands. AAACCCKKK!!! I screamed ... and it echoed off the mountain behind our house.

Fabio's head twisted like the girl, Linda Blair, that starred in the movie, "The Exorcist" and his head was freakishly turned all the way, and clear around! His beak pierced right into my cuticle of my forefinger. Blood instantly squirted everywhere (Oh, this is PG13 and you may want to stop here) and he liked it, the blood, I mean ... like Mikey loves "Life Cereal" You can Google that if your not old enough to remember.

Then, if that wasn't enough blood he laid into my thumb and peeled it clean-back. I was hopping around screaming. NO! I couldn't get the darn bird off my thumb--he was attached ... by golly. And, he wasn't letting go. I was shaking him, dancing, and Oh-my-gosh ...I'm glad there wasn't anyone here to record it all. You know the crazy thing I've been doing for him? I've been giving him cuddle bones to sharpen that beak so he can get into the his seeds easier. I didn't know he was saving that sharpened beak for me.

**Our Canaries**



Chipper Is "On-the-Lamb!"

My sweet little canaries never escape or have tried to escape. They love being incarcerated. Just after Fabio attacked me "Chipper" just wanted to see if the open door to his water was just glass and he hopped-out. Flying and flying in our big living with 10 foot ceilings, I think he thought he was outside, like really outside. I almost fainted because he's a rescue bird, too and I had left our front door wide open to let the breeze inside. Tanner, my grandson made the fast move to shut the door. Whew!

Fabio, the bird from the "debol" runs on the floor and hisses. He doesn't fly because of the attack by the hawk. He's only a one-winged bird, but he runs fast and right-at-cha!

Canaries are so different. Chipper, the darker orange-colored canary. I have two. The birds pictured above ^ are the same bird just different filters on my Instagram camera. The other one "Sunshine", my other canary, his little feathers are soft butter yellow, and I need to add I can't get him out of the cage, he loves his home. Both of my canaries sing beautifully in the afternoon.♪♫•*¨*•♥•*¨*•♫

The little canary wasn't afraid or even shy, but seemed to twitch like he was nervous and confused. Chipper landed on top of my sofa back and sang a couple little short arias. Was he trying to tell me something? I walked over to the spare cage that I use in cleaning their jails by changing the birds-out.  I quickly removed the large gabled top and I walked over and set the top on the Chipper. He didn't move, but looked around. I reached my hand under slowly and placed my hand over his back.  My hand held him tight so that I wouldn't loose my grip, but it frightened the little bird. He started breathing harder and harder and I thought his rapid heart-beats would cause my dear canary to have a coronary. I was freaking him out! His little canary head thrashed from side to side. "Help!" "Chirp, chirp."

I hurried over to his cage and set him in his favorite spot in the feeder. Each of the canaries nest in their feeders and face each other. Sunshine wasn't going to budge and he was there for his buddy. Don't get me wrong, they have their little squables and short little yellow feathers fly, but they are true compardres in every way. Chipper's chest was now rising and falling and there was a tear running down his beak. I don't know if he was just letting it all go and the two canaries chatted for a long while, working it out. There wasn't any long singing this evening and I think I heard Chipper say to Sunshine softly, "We couldn't survive on the outside." Chipper and Sunshine have been so accustomed  to their cage that both love  the coziness of their little home. The fact of being incarcerated so long and having the feeling of security and safety has made them both fear freedom. I didn't realize that agrophobia is a condition that crosses all creatures if they stay in one place long enough. Our gold fish hate flopping around outside in the dirt when the water flows them over the edge of the horse trough.

I need to mention that Fabio is still pitching a fit and throwing birdseed all over. He's squawking and jumping back and forth like I'm sticking with a fork. I don't know if after all this time that he even remembers that he could fly at one time. The day the hawk layed-him-out in the farmer's field was a ferocious fight. There was evidence everywhere that it was a "fight to the death" and the take-down was all on Fabio's side. All Fabio sustained was a fractured wing. His wing was torn terribly, but  he was so obstinate about the touch of a human or anything, that we couldn't perform therapy on him without having to have therapy ourselves. He wants to be free in our house and that's not going to happen on my watch. I need to note here that he has such a hot temper that he did go for blood on hawk, up the canyon. All that was found at the site was Fabio standing over an dessicated hawk corpse with his broken wing dragging in the dirt. The hawk was so destroyed that no one could identify the species.

 I was the bird rescuer and was snookered by the local farmer to take home a weary pet. I wondered why the farmer was wearing steel-chained gloves, maybe that sow of his is getting a lot more feisty. I really hate that pig! He handed the cocktail, I mean Cockatiel over to me gently with a twinkle and a sigh of relief. No longer were his chickens in danger and I heard later he mentioned to the feed store owners that he's hoping the hens might start to lay again next spring. I thought came to me while I left  the farm ... I felt a sense of relief from the farmer that when I left in my FJ, I was removing something equally deadly as a rattlesnake or scorpion. Little did I know I was about to take on the vicious, "Fabio, the Vampire Bird."

 Fabio walks like a big ol' turkey and that's fine with him. I went over to his cage to see if he spilled all his water out on the floor and he gave me a long, hard stare. I saw deep in his eyes a dark red. Fabio wants blood revenge and now I need to watch my back. I could just leave the door open and he could run with the cats. They would be genuinely afraid of him, but he might solve our gopher problem. Or he could stalk me.
You could die from that.
See? You could die from that!

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

An Honor? Holy Cow! I Am Flabbergasted

Ranch Mama  was so very kind-hearted to honor me with such a sweet Blogger Award. I'm for the first time speechless which is probably the first time ever. I'm really trying to whittle-down my blogs for easy reading and organizing in my labels. Ranch Mama is a beautiful cowgirl that tackles a huge job of being a mother, wife. and innkeeper ... clear-up in the mountains of Montana. Here's the award she gave to me and I'm so honored I can't contain myself. I think I'll go in and have another cold-one (Diet Dr. Pepper)

Here's the list of fun things and they are ones that we are required to do:   Yippee!
1. Thank the person that gave the award to you and link back to their blog.
2. Answer 7 questions about yourself.
3. Provide 10 random factoids about yourself.
4. Hand the award to 7 deserving others

1. Name 3 things you find most beautiful about the natural world? 

A newborn baby has to be first on my list. The mountains of Southwest Colorado where my great grandparents homesteaded in the 1890's. The "Pink Moment" at sundown at the beach or across the mountains and bluffs where we live.

2. What was the most creepiest thing to happen to you in the Doctor's office?

 The doctor was checking me for breast cancer lumps and had me stand on one foot without any covering over my chest and jump on one foot and repeat on the other side. Recently, I had to moon the doctor (not the same doctor) and show him a suspicious skin cancer spot and turned out be a pimple. The only other one was was when I had my gall bladder and appendix removed and Dr. Carson Liu said that he loved looking inside me. I felt more naked at that moment than another other time in my life.

3.What are your two biggest regrets and how would I change them or do differently?

I had to give shots to our horses and our young stallion was doing his morning feisty dance. He knew something was going to happen. Back then, the West Nile shot had to be given separate from the 6-way. I disregarded all the warnings coming into my head of my dad telling me to never get on a ladder and hold a horse. Steve had Sonny on the other side and had him pushed-up against the fence. I also didn't heed the warning about wearing gloves and that's especially wrong when handling a nylon lead rope. At the second injection Sonny reared and turned-away from me. The force threw me out flying and down on the ground and into the heavy, wire fence. I tried to save my face from getting smashed in the fence, but I broke both my kneecaps and also had heavy damage to the cartilage and ligaments in my knees. I thought I just bloodied my hands and it did take the skin clean-off. Steve told me he'd buy me anything and take me shopping... so he helped me in the car and I walked carefully into a large computer store. Suddenly, I couldn't walk at all just as I entered the large store. My shock had worn off and Steve had to carry me out of the store. Bummer, I didn't get to buy anything, either. My biggest regret here is that I didn't listen to the promptings I received. The other regret is that I should have landed on my hands and elbows to save my knees. My knees are still hurting. I could have gotten a free face-lift outta' that fence and dang it, that would've been wonderful.

4. What’s your biggest pet peeve?

 Pet? Our dogs bark at cats, skunks, raccoons, coyotes, and probably rats, birds, and whatever else they hallucinate about in the middle of the night. I know it annoys everyone. Today I was putting citronella in the bark-breaker of our Ginger-dog and the spray hit me right in the kisser. I still have a headache. I think  citronella is worse than a shock-collar. We have a roping arena in our backyard and our family has had one the whole time I was growing-up. My grandfather and dad had "team roping" on Sundays and every Sunday or when my dad had a mischievous idea, I got hit with the cattle prod.I think I shocked him plenty myself. I've been cattle prodded a lot more than 100 times and even had cattle prod fights (a little like LIGHT SABERS from STAR WARS) just a "little" like play-light sabers because they weren't lights, the prods were electric. So all you pet owners that worry about your pet getting shocked by one teeny battery, try eight! No big deal.

5. How would you describe yourself in three words?

The first one is difficult to admit and I'm constantly told to "get-over-it" I'm a world-class "worrier" and it's not lack of faith. It's just I think I can figure-out in my head some solution even to those things I couldn't possibly fix. I have this thing about the words, "Study it out in your mind... prayer phrase that keeps me engaged in troubling thoughts. Okay....The two others are easy, I'm a "Cowgirl" and lastly, I'm "Happy."

6. What do you do that scares your husband?

Very easy! I scare the wits out-of-him every time I sneeze.

7. When did you last laugh?

Pillow talk last night. Tanner, our grandson was in the back bedroom and I worried about him hearing us laughing. I was cold and Steve cuddled-up to warm me. I faced him and thought how perfect his face seemed to me and I set my hand on his cheek and I said, "You look like a Roman God" and he put his hand on my cold cheek and said, "You look like a Hollywood Goddess." I laughed until my sides hurt and that laughing just set me off. Have you ever tried NOT to laugh? My excuse: I was way too tired.

The 10 Factoids. "Just the Facts, Ma'am, just the facts." Not in any particular order...

1. I shouldn't eat bread, frozen yogurt, or drink Dr. Pepper. All cause gas
2. My goal is to lose plenty of weight now that I'm not taking Prednisone. Ugh!
3. I have a bunch of children and grandchildren that keep me on my toes and make my life completely  wonderful.
4. I'm Mormon and love Church. Cussing is not in my vocabulary but sometimes I think the four-letter "S" word. I'm repenting a lot.
5. We have a ranch and my biggest regret is selling the donkeys. I love to milk our goats, shear the wooly sheep, and we have horses, lots of dogs, and I don't have a clue where the dang cats came from, really they're feral, but all are after me every nite to feed 'em. The chickens are the most giving of our creatures. Our crop is growing rocks.
6. I'm dyslexic. And nto (see?) only do I write puzzels.... I can even talk backwards every single day, like "Yoda" in the Star Wars movie. It takes me a couple "do overs" to write in my blog because I have to do extra editing.
7. Swimming is my therapy and keeps me sane or insane and even though my mother told me I could never knit or crochet because I'm "impaired mentally" I can totally do those things and love knitting in the car. It's the only thing I can do to stop worry, relax, and I don't get carsick. See what idle hands vs. busy fingers can do for you?
9. My husband bought me my dream car, a Toyota FJ Cruiser and I almost rolled it in the desert while it still had the dealer plates. He broke our movie camera by dropping it to run and save me. The FJ has already got over 1,000 miles on it. We have Arizona, California, Utah, and Arkansas pin-stripping.
10. I can't bite my fingernails because a couple months ago...crazy Eddie, my dentist, made my teeth rounded on the top and bottom. Dang, with an "S"

I would like to give this "Kreativ Blogger Award" to the next 7 wonderful bloggers:

Please, please... Oh please visit these great blogs. All are unique and all are fun to read. You might want to see White Balance's website. And please visit me again. So happy!