The All-American hero is as much a part of the DNA of comic books as wearing your underpants over your trousers and impossible cleavage. Every comic book line has its defender of truth, justice and apple-pie, from Captain America at Marvel, Superman at the Distinguished Competition and Patriot at Image Comics.

Every now and again, however, these golden boys and girls go rogue. Whether twisted by magic or chronological manipulation, or reimagined as part of some Elseworlds shenanigans, when the All-American hero spits out the pie, bad things happen.

And they would have almost certainly voted for Trump.

On this, the most star-spangled of days, Geek Ireland presents the top 5 All-American heroes that would have ensured a red state.

5. Superman: Red Son

All American Hero Superman Red Son

In Mark Millar’s 2003 Elseworlds tale, Kal-El’s rocket lands in the Soviet Union instead of a small farm in Kansas. Instead of fighting for truth, justice, and the American Way, he is described as the Champion of the common worker who fights a never-ending battle for Stalin, socialism and the international expansion of the Warsaw Pact.

This entry might be cheating a little, as the Red Son would not have had a vote to cast in the 2016 US election. That said, the confirmed reports by the FBI that malicious intervention from Russian sources in the electoral process probably contributed to Trump’s win, and Trump’s own admissions that he admires the way they do business, means that at the very least, Superman would have been delighted with the election’s outcome. It’s a great deal….believe me!

4. Hal Jordan/Parallax

All American Parallax

When Hal Jordan’s home town was destroyed by the evil Mongul, it left him susceptible to the fear parasite known as Parallax. The flag waving fighter-jet pilot turned his back on his friends and became an omnipotent despot, at one point trying to use his near god-like powers to re-write time to fix his beloved Coast City.

There is little doubt that Parallax would have approved of Trump’s fear mongering. From Mexican infestations to immigrants with bad intentions, Trump has built his Presidential success on the back of fear, the same fear that feeds the Parallax entity.

Hal Jordan eventually defeated Parallax and reclaimed his humanity. At least that’s what Fraud news CNN reported.

3. Captain Marvel/Shazam

All American Shazam

In Mark Waid’s seminal 1996 comic Kingdom Come, a future where Superman and friends have retired, leaving a newer, grittier generation of super humans to run riot over the planet. Blly Batson/Captain Marvel/Shazam is under the control of Lex Luthor, who is fighting for humanity but still managing to be a complete turd in the way he goes about it.

The grown up Billy Batson is a mindless stooge, devoid of any willpower or self-worth – a grinning empty marionette, willing to follow orders without questioning their source. He is a man who has completely abandoned his own values and is now dead inside.

Remind you of anyone?

Paul Ryan


2. Jean Grey

Dark Phoenix American

When not dead, the X-men‘s all-American girl, Jean Grey, spends most of her time trying to fight the corrupting influence of the galaxy’s most powerful entity – The Phoenix. The Phoenix is an irresistible force of cosmic change, burning out the bits it feels doesn’t work allowing new things to take their place. It is also surprisingly easy to corrupt, having a real jones for the darker aspects of human emotions.

When Jean last succumbed to the Dark Phoenix, she destroyed a fair amount of the cosmos. The all-encompassing allure of power led this erstwhile benign creature to do some pretty horrible stuff in the pursuit of said power.

On an unrelated note, Kellyanne Elizabeth Conway is the current Counselor to U.S. president Donald Trump. She is the first woman to ever successfully run a presidential campaign.

1. Captain America

Captain America Hydra

And now for the grand-daddy of betrayal. This one carries far more weight than the others due to the fact that it is an ongoing story.

After some time-tinkering by the cosmic cube at the behest of the Red Skull, Steve Rogers aka Captain America’s history was altered to make him a deep, deep, deep cover agent of Hydra. The reveal of his duplicity sent shock waves through not only the Marvel Universe, but comic book fandom who have been nursing the wound of betrayal in the only way they know how – internet trolling.

Captain America’s abandonment of all of the values that he embodies is hard to swallow in a way that all the others on this list can not possibly be. This isn’t just turning evil, this is a corruption of something that was supposed to be shining and pure, a co-opting of a perfect ideal, the cancer of freedom itself.

On January 20th, 2017, Donald Trump was sworn is as the 45th President of the United States of America.