Dear Dairy, Oops Diary, Here Are Some Confessions About My Weekend

Confession 1: I like cheap earrings. I buy them in bunches at Big Lots. My sister-in-law Lindsay does the same. Which means sometimes we show up at parties with, you got it, the same earrings. Embarrassing? No. More like flattering. More like ESP. More like love, really. Stephanie and I can visit Targets across the country from each other and buy the same thing. It's happened before and it's bound to happen, you got it, again.

Confession 2: I want long hair. I want it so bad. When my hair grows anywhere around my shoulder blades I look like a convicted killer on death row with not much time. Or, like any of Charlize Theron's latest choice in characters (in hopes that she wins all the Oscars ever casted by the Academy!) Or, in other words, trashy. My BFF Wendy, (on the right) was born with hair touching the last rib on her rib cage. Lindsay (on the left) can cut her hair one week and grow it back to where it was previously the next month.

Confession a: I hate them both.

Confession b: I am lying, I really love them both.

Confession 3: My nephew Phun is smarter than me. He knows physics. It really hurts my feelings. Mostly because this makes two nephews who are smarter than me (Miles).

Confession 4: Kentucky forgot to buy her husband MD a birthday cake yesterday and I condoned buying one on the Sabbath. This isn't really my sin, it's more like Kentucky's sin because we had a 15 minute debate before she left for Utah on who should get the cake (I said me, she said her.) As we sat down to my delectable dinner (brag, brag) she looked at me with fear and trembling "I can't believe it." And I knew. She had forgotten her own sweet husband's birthday cake. A trip to Baskin & Robbins was pulling the ox out of the birthday mire, and I decided right then and there, that I was going to support her in her sin. So help me. Besides, people who survive cancer twice in two years don't go to hell. Necessarily.

Confession 5: It's my spring break and the West is about to get just a little more Wild.


P.S. Happy Birthday MD the horses run in April.

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